More Credit Card Follies
Me: Thank you for calling Small Business Credit Card Company Application Line to apply for a credit card for your business. (Collects information such as name and address from caller.) And may I have the name of your business?
Caller: Bid-ness? I don't have no bid-ness.
Me: Congratulations. You've been approved. Your credit limit is $1400 and your credit card will arrive in 7-10 business days.
Caller: $1400! That's awesome! That's the easiest thousand bucks I ever made! Who needs to work when you've got a credit card?
Me: May I have your social security number, please?
Caller: Sure, it's ###-##-####.
Me: And may I have your mailing address?
Caller: What the **** do you need THAT for?
Me: So I know where to send your credit card.
Caller: I don't like that. I don't think I want to give you my address.
Caller: Can I get a credit card without you doing a credit check on me?
Me: Congratulations. You've been approved. Your credit limit is $15,000.
Caller: That's it? That's all you're giving me? **** it.
Caller: I want to get my son a credit card for Christmas. Can I apply for one in his name?
Me: No, sir. I'm sorry. That would constitute fraud, and we'd both get in big trouble for it.
Caller: That's stupid! He's responsible enough for a credit card. I mean, he is sixteen now, and he needs to build his credit.
I've had people get credit and debit cards confused, but that's understandable. One guy, though, thought he could get a green card through me.
Then there were those with the bizarre names. Customers with oriental accents trying to spell their names and giving me letters like "E, uh, 4, teh, go, 9, W." Or customers from states like Alabama and Georgia with names like "Shalondamoniqua." That one was just strange enough to me that I had to write it down.