It Leaks
By: repsac
I remembered this story a few days ago, and found myself laughing myself silly in the car. It's a great story, with a rather amusing ending. The story itself, is perhaps one of the first stories I gained while working in Returns for Lowe's, and from all I've told it to, this story has the chance to be a classic.
I remember like it was yesterday. I had just started working in Returns, perhaps even had just started working at the store. It was a nice warm summer day, and my chicken legs and I (hairy white pasty legs of mine) were kicking back waiting for my shift to end. Ten minutes and counting.
As I stood there, my mind wandering to the things I might do that evening, I see this older woman coming across the parking lot. I also notice that she's got this long thing dragging behind her. Long black thing…oh, I get it. It's a hose! Probably had a hole in it or she left it in the sun. You'd be suprised how many times that would happen. Customers don't realise that hot water expands. Hoses, do not.
Walking into my returns area, the woman plonks this hose down on my counter. You know, as I've said before I hated doing it, but I had to ask the stupidest questions then. "What's wrong?" was the most common, and the one I asked of her. "It leaks!" she said, crossing her arms looking at me.
Well, that's to the point.
Picking up the hose I began to feel all down the length of it, trying to find the hole. As I do this, I notice that the hose has this sandy/gritty texture. This isn't totally unexpected since we live in a sandy area. Still, something wasn't right.
Looking up at the woman I ask curiously. "Where does it leak."
Looking at me as though I am a fool, the woman says. "All down the length of the thing and for the life of me I can't figure out why!"
Waitaminutehere!
Looking at the hose again, it dawns on me. This is a soaker hose. It's supposed to leak!
"Ma'am, It's a soaker hose…" she interrupts me and nods. "I know. I bought it because of that."
Ohkay…
"But ma'am…they're supposed to leak."
Blink Blink Blink
"I bought it because it said soaker. Doesn't that mean it puts out more water?" she said angrilly, but also with disbelief.
"Uh…no. Ma'am, it's got tiny holes all in it. It's supposed to leak."
She stared at me a moment and said those wonderful words. "I don't believe you. I want to speak to a manager."
Ok, that I can do. I call over Gina, explain the situation to which she turns to the customer.
"What's the problem again?"
"The hose leaks."
I add to Gina. "Soaker Hose."
Gina blinks, stares at me and then says to the customer (while fighting back laughter) "Ma'am, it's supposed to leak" after that she turns to me, and lets me go clock out while she deals with this.
epilogue:
Next day I come into work, only to find a soaker hose cut up into half a dozen pieces on my damaged cart. The explanation being: Customer accidentally ran over with lawnmower. Hose leaks.