Quotes from people that should not have credit cards.
Actual things I've had customer say to me at the credit card call center:
"What do you mean I'm being charged interest? Everyone knows that credit cards aren't allowed to charge interest!"
You know, because interest free loans are so lucrative these days. Even sadder, I've heard this more than once.
"What do you mean there's a limit to how much I can spend on my card!?!"
This guy blew through $3500 in less than 2 months. And it wasn't on stuff that needed financing, it was all little stuff like trips to McDonalds. The majority of his purchases were $5 or less.
SC: I was listening to your automated system, and I think it said I owed $117.
ME: Actually you owe $170.
SC: How can that be?
ME: Your previous balance was $270, you paid $100, so now you owe $170.
SC: I'll just assume that I only owe $117 because I like that amount better. And if my bill comes any differently, I'll be calling up again to raise holy hell with you guys!"
"Is my credit card a credit card or a debit card?"
SC: This card won't work.
ME: According to my system, you're attepting to use an expired credit card. What is the expiration date on that card you are using?
SC: It says the expiration date is 01/05.
ME: Well, there's the problem. You should be using a newer card.
SC: But doesn't expiration date mean that's the day you sent it out? That means this is the newest one.
"I need to report some fraud on my account. According to my statement, I was billed by a place called Late Fee. I know I've never shopped there."
It got even better, when I explained that the fee due to her payment being late, she screamed the payment being late was impossible, since she had put the payment in the mail a WHOLE TWO DAYS before the payment was due. She was adamant that she had sent her payment in plenty of time.
SC: How much is my minimum due?
ME: Your minimum due is $20. It is due [in three weeks].
SC: Holy crap! Can I get an extension on the due date? It'll be a long time before I come up with that kind of money.
SC, who's balance is now double than the original purchase due to interest and lates fees: Can I set my password for this account to 1234? That's the same PIN number I have on my food stamp card, so it'll be eaisier to remember.