Are you at peoples beck and call?

[Kiwi]

Blas's thread on door to door salesmen interrupting her day made me think of something.

Do you answer your phone or door anytime someone calls or knocks?

I dont.... and drives my boyfriend crazy that I wont answer the door (or the buzzer intercom) or the phone if I dont feel like it. I will set the answerphone and screen my calls. He will RUSH to the phone or to the door and look at me as if Im crazy. Its the same with my cellphone, if I dont feel like talking to someone or Im busy doing something I just wont answer it.

But my boyfriend will answer it no matter what! He could be driving (I hate that) or eating or even out on a date!!!!! That phone gets answered no matter what, so does the door, if someone buzzes hes at the intercom asap. I have been that way all my life, if someone comes to the door and I dont feel like answering it, I wont... I carry on with my day. My friends and family know that a "pop over" isnt going to happen and will at least call first, I dont even call on my own mother without ringing ahead to see if she has time for a visit.

Even if Im going to answer the door its in my own time, if im not dressed or my hands are wet I take the time to dress or dry my hands. My boyfriends family all do the pop over, totally uninvited! Its so rude! His mom will bang on the door at 9am on the weekend when we are still sleeping and he wont stay in bed and ignore it. He leaps out of bed and gets dressed to let them in. They all think IM THE RUDE ONE! when I shut the bedroom door and keep sleeping or reading.

So am I alone on this? Do you always answer the phone or door when someone calls? Do you think you should have to?

[jb17kx]

I have a private (unlisted) number, so there's rarely a time when I have to answer the phone, but when it does ring I do.

As to the door, I'm a little more restrained. Generally, if they're not expected and I'm busy, or I can't see them from a little window along the side of the house, they don't get to speak with me.

[RecoveringKinkoid]

"His mom will bang on the door at 9am on the weekend when we are still sleeping and he wont stay in bed and ignore it. He leaps out of bed and gets dressed to let them in.

Which is precisely why they do it. They've certainly got him trained well.

No, my telephone is there for my convenience. If it's not convenient for me to answer it when it rings, then the person on the other end will have to make do with the convenience of leaving me a message to call back when I am able. Which I promise I will do in a timely fashion.

As for my door, if someone is banging on it, I will look to see who it is, as it's probably one of my neighbors. They've come to my door with local petitions, Girl Scout cookies, urgent news about affairs on my street or what have you. I will answer it for my neighbors, that's not a problem. They don't bang on my door very often. And never at an odd hour.

I might crack the door for a stranger to see what he wants. If he's a saleman, I'll just politely decline and close the door. I'll crack it to make sure it's not a lineman or a water guy telling me he'll be working in front or something.

My friends and family are far too polite to show up on my doorstep without a call. If they ever did, I'd know it was a huge emergency. Knock wood, it's not an issue because it's never happened. If they showed up unannounced for no reason habitually, yeah, I'd do exactly what you do. In fact, I had an old sort-of-boyfriend in college that did that shit when I lived in parent's house. I had told him not to do it, he kept doing it anyway. I couldn't stop my parents letting him in. But that didn't mean I couldn't just hang out in my room with the door locked.

Way to demote yourself to "Thick Skulled Non Boyfriend" status, dude.

[MadMike]

I'll answer the door, but I'll check the Caller ID before I answer the phone. If it shows the name of a business, a number/name I don't know, or nothing, I let the machine screen it.

My ex was one that would answer the phone no matter what, no matter what we may have been in the middle of. And yes, she's stopped in the middle of "that" to answer the phone. :rant:

One time, she really pissed me off. One of the former managers at my job was always trying to call people in on the weekend to catch up on management's latest mismanaged project, so I started screening calls because of that.

One Saturday, the phone rang. I told her, "Let the machine get it!"

She starts reaching for it anyway. I tell her, "I'm not here!"

Next thing I hear from her, "Yeah, he's right here."

I got stuck going into work that day. :pissed:

[myswtghst]

I <3 caller ID. I will not answer my phone ever if the number isn't in my phone book or doesn't have a prefix (all our work numbers start with the same digits) that I recognize.

Also, I generally don't answer my phone before 10AM no matter who you are, unless it's my parents or my grandma, in case its an emergency, and my mom knows full well I'll be grouchy being woken up, since I work til midnight and don't go to bed til 3 or 4 most nights. I operate by the same theory if I've gone to bed and am sleeping, unless it's my parents or someone calls multiple times. Then, it better be an emergency or I'm ignoring your calls for a month. :p

As for the door, I don't have people come by unless I know they're coming. I like my space and don't generally have people over at all, so if my buzzer goes, I usually have warning. If it goes and I'm not expecting anyone, I'll ignore the first buzz, and maybe wander out to the balcony to take a look on the second buzz, if it's daytime. Otherwise, anyone who'd ring my buzzer that I actually would want to see has my cell #, anc can call that to warn me.

[Misanthropical]

It drives my children crazy that I will ignore the doorbell. I told them that just because someone rings the bell and/or knocks on the door doesn't mean I have to answer it.

I rarely answer the phone and have no problem letting the machine get it.

[Kiwi]

there he goes again! he has been home for an hour and 3 phone calls later!

everytime his damn phone rings I jump!

[BusBus]

I have caller ID for a reason. If I do not recognize the number (or don't want to speak to the caller :whistle:), I let the machine get it. I live in an apartment complex, so if I am not expecting someone, my buzzer gets ignored.

[BookstoreEscapee]

I check caller ID too. If the house phone rings it's usually not for me and if it's a business or unknown I won't answer at all. Easier for me if they leave a message anyway. Then I just leave a note to make sure my parents check the machine.

I will usually answer the door, though. Though if you were to ring my doorbell at 9am on a Saturday it is highly unlikely that I will hear you. I'm not the type to "pop over" but if I did and the person was busy I would never expect them to just drop everything to entertain me. The closest I'd come to dropping in on someone would be to call and say I'm nearby and do they mind if I drop by.

[blas]

I work 3rd shift. My friends know when I sleep. They should know better than to call or stop by, but they don't. They call and show up. Especially my younger friend who just wants to gab about her boyfriend all the time.

I ignore the door and the phone if I'm sleeping. I bet it drives my neighbors nuts.

I used to answer the door just because I got sick of friends who wouldn't stop knocking or ringing the bell. They knew I was home. I'd answer the door and snap at them.

Sometimes I just gotta be rude about it. I respect that they sleep at night, can't they respect that I sleep during the afternoon?

[powerboy]

I'll answer the door, but I'll check the Caller ID before I answer the phone. If it shows the name of a business, a number/name I don't know, or nothing, I let the machine screen it.

My ex was one that would answer the phone no matter what, no matter what we may have been in the middle of. And yes, she's stopped in the middle of "that" to answer the phone. :rant:




That is how my ex was also. I do the same thing as you, I will answer the door. But if the house phone or cell phone goes off, I will screen it first.

[digilight]

Caller ID is a great thing. If its a 800/866 or a unavailable number then it goes to the machine. The wife usually answers the phone though (I hate the damn thing). We very rarely get anyone at the door. Usually its just our neighbor who brings us coffee and goodies (His son is a shift lead at starbucks and keeps him and us supplied with the caffinated goodness). And we are real good friends with our neighbors nextdoor, they are like family to us so its no prob when they knock. We are lucky though, we don't get the normal family dropins, or door to door sales people. In the 3 years we've been at this place, we've only had 4 door to door people, 2 doing some carpet cleaning scam, and 2 for political reasons.

[Princess-Snake]

How about people who continue ringing the doorbell even though it's quite clear you're not going to answer? I was expecting a medical delivery last night. The delivery guy knows to take the coolers I put out and just leave the new coolers on the porch. I'll get it later because most of the time, I'm too busy to deal with them at the moment.
Last night I wasn't really busy, I was just watching COPS on tv. But I was cold, my head hurt, and I was feeling like crap, so I didn't get up to answer the door when the bell rang. I thought that the guy already knows to just leave the stuff. About three minutes later, the doorbell rings again. I'm thinking, "Okay, maybe it's a new guy. He'll get the message soon enough." Oh, and I should mention, on the delivery ticket, it says to leave the stuff at the door if owner doesn't answer. Three minutes later, the doorbell rings again. This continues for fifteen minutes straight. I am really pissed off. I am not answering the door, I'm sick and don't feel like getting up just to acknowledge the fact you're on my porch with my coolers. Just leave it! And if that's not bad enough, he circles the house three times, each time ringing the doorbell because he saw the tv on and possibly me lying on the couch. He finally gets the message and leaves the coolers.
I waited about ten minutes just to make sure he left before I went to get my stuff. When I unpacked my things, I saw that out of the three coolers I had left on the porch, he only took one of them. :pissed: I called the company and complained about the situation. I gave them a description of the guy (I saw what he looked like as he circled the house trying to see if anyone's there.) and they told me he was new, but he was told to leave it at the damn door several times! It was even printed on the goddamn delivery ticket! They promised to have a stern and severe word with him. I don't doubt that they did. I really like this company, but that delivery guy sucked!

[RecoveringKinkoid]

I had a dear, sweet old 80 year old Aunt that lived in Florida who was sick of door to door church people. We were at her house and the doorbell rang and she just grumped 'Damn mormons again." and didn't move from her chair. Well, they could see us inside and were evidently thick in the head, because they kept ringing. Finally, Aunt Es got up, shuffled to the door, opened it and barked "What, you don't take the hint? Get the hell off my porch!" She then slammed the door and shuffled back to her chair as if nothing had happened.

I got the idea this was a common event at her place.

[blas]

I feel so bad for my little friend's boyfriend. He's my age, just the nicest boy on earth.

He is at her beck and call. He must answer his phone or she gets upset. He has to be there when she asks. Kind of like the way my ex roomate's gf is. If he doesn't answer by the 3rd ring, that means to her that he's cheating, and she needs to yell at him. Rrrrrr.....

My little friend isn't good at taking hints, either.

To think, I'm such a mellow girlfriend, really easy going, not quick to jump the gun on small shit........yet boys would rather date controlling obsessive crazy girls over me.

[AFpheonix]

It's pretty rare that anyone comes to my door and I'm not expecting them. Last time it was Jehovah's Witnesses. >.<

I had to learn how to screen calls on my cell before I got married and after, because I had so many church people calling and wanting to talk me out of marrying my husband, and after to try to talk me into standing up in front of the church and saying it was a mistake, but that it would be a bigger sin to divorce.

God, that sucked.

I just leave my phone out in my purse and check it a few times a day. If someone needs me, they can leave me a message and I'll get back to them.

[protege]

Having a phone on me at all times...is a bit annoying.

The thing won't ring all day, but as soon as I get in the car, or the bathroom, or any other place where it's not possible to answer...the damn thing starts ringing. And no, I don't talk while driving. Not only is it dangerous, but it's difficult to steer, shift gears, and hold the damn phone. Whoever it is can wait :p

[Dreamstalker]

He must answer his phone or she gets upset. He has to be there when she asks. Kind of like the way my ex roomate's gf is.
The bungee bf used to be that way, until I went off on him when he called as I was eyeball-deep in computer innards trying to get A fixed, pull as much data as possible off of B, rebuild C, and have it all done yesterday (just cause you have way too much free time does not mean I can/should/want to drop everything).

He's started doing it again...call once. If I'm interested in talking, I will call you back. How hard are these simple rules: not after 7 PM any day as my TV shows are on (and no, this does not mean "call at 5 and keep me on the phone until 8"), not on Thursdays at all as I'm working, and not before noon on Fridays.

And WTF is it with some people calling when you're in the bathroom and acting all offended when you say you'll call them back in a few minutes?

[Dragonlover]

If someone knocks at the door, I'll answer. As a rule, if someones knocking on a day people aren't coming over, it's someone that lives here. As for my mobile, I'll answer it if its on me. Frequently, I've left it in the bedroom. Drives the GF nuts. I'll get the 'What if its an emergency?' talk, to which my response is 'There are several other people you can call who will either be in the building with me, or on the next road over. I have a phone so that I contact other people, not so they can contact me'

Dragonlover

[nhollywood]

I used to be the "answer door / phone immediately" but am now a "screener". In my opinion, it depends on the area that you live in. For example, when I lived in Tennessee, people dropping by was actually a pleasant surprise but now I live in California and I won't answer anything that I haven't screened (even at work). If I'm asked about it being an emergency then I reply "if it's that much of an emergency then you should be calling 911 (999 in UK)".

I did have my wife answer and give me the phone thinking it was a friend of mine. After she overheard my end of the conversation with a bill collector, she doesn't do that anymore.

[blas]

It just blows my mind the amount of people who dont understand that missed calls almost always appear on people's phones. That includes the phone # and time of call. And voicemails can be received on almost all cell phones, provided their messages aren't already full.

Why in God's name do people insist on flooding people's phones and repeatedly calling? If I'm at work, my phone is OFF.......calling me 20 times is not going to make me answer. I won't even know anyone called until I turn it back on.

Most people may be busy, and they will call you back when they have a free second. If they don't want to, they won't. Simple as that. Once is enough. Infact, repeatedly calling me is enough to make me not answer or return the calls. It's annoying.

[Dreamstalker]

I'm fairly lucky in that my apartment-door peephole has an unobstructed view of the glass front door, so I can see who it is without letting them know I'm home.

Exactly, blas. My desire to do something is inversely proportional to how much I'm bugged about it. Flood my phone and leave no messages of substance, and I won't return the calls. If you expect a call back, either leave a detailed message (and for the love of Cthulhu stop calling every 5 minutes) or email me.

[ArenaBoy]

I hate answering phones and I will answer the phone if I damn well feel like it. At my parents whenever I had the house to myself and I was just content sitting down watching TV the damn phone would go off and it'd be one of my sister's friends. The fact that I rarely answer the phone drives my friends, any girlfriend I had, parents, and work nuts. I won't mind answering if I'm not in the middle of something but the phone always goes off when I'm enjoying myself. As for doors, good luck if I even come. I'm the same with way with phones.

[Crazeyal]

I had to learn how to screen calls on my cell before I got married and after, because I had so many church people calling and wanting to talk me out of marrying my husband, and after to try to talk me into standing up in front of the church and saying it was a mistake, but that it would be a bigger sin to divorce.
Who the hell did you marry... MANSON?!?!?!

[Iced Coffee Man]

I am the same with my home phone, I never answer it anymore. One time it rang and it was one of my Dad's friends, and my Dad wasn't home at the time.
So he left this very long and confusing message for me to tell my Dad, I'm amazed I even remembered it. Why he couldn't just tell him himself I don't know. Don't get me wrong, I don't mind doing things for my Dad, but this guy made me shake my head.

As for the phone at work, I always run off or pretend to be busy when it rings :p

[Crazeyal]

My phone has an ignore option...

That, and I don't pay for a %#$%#$ landline when the wireless is just as (un)reliable as the landlines.

[Jinxy]

I *DO NOT* answer the phone or the door unless I feel like it. I will check the caller ID if it's close at hand and if it's someone that I feel like dealing with atm then I'll answer but flooding my phone won't get me to call you any quicker.

I just (last night) had a HUGE debate with my bf about this topic, he was in the middle of helping me cook dinner and telling me about his day and when the phone rang he walked over to it, looked at the caller ID and then saying he didn't want to talk to the person on the other end, picked up the phone, leaving what was on the stove to burn and chat.
I was just dumbstruck, and hurt that someone he didn't want to talk to was so important that dinner was almost ruined.

I seriously asked him what the point of caller ID was and why were we paying for it.

Jinxy

[blas]

Last night was just the icing on the cake.

I had a date. Mind you, I'd only slept for few hours after work Friday morning while I did laundry. I spend all afternoon trying to look my best for my date.

After my date, I became so tired that I forgot to lock the door, and I literally sank into my bed and promptly went to sleep. This was at about 8:00 pm.

At 8:15 I heard my phone go off. It woke me up. I saw it was my little friend. I ignored it. It went off literally 5 minutes later. I got up, picked up my phone, and silenced it. It started to vibrate over and over and over. It dung three voicemails in that time frame.

I looked at my phone when I awoke from a dream at about 10:30, and I'd already had over 10 missed calls from her and 5 voicemails. I also had a text from the guy I went out with and my other friend trying to go over plans for tonight. I went back to sleep.

Then around midnight or so, I hear pounding on my front door. Pounding. I placed my pillow over my head, remembering I'd left my door unlocked. Oh shit.

Then went the doorbell. You know how some little kids will press it over and over and over and over? Yes, just like that.

Then I heard the doorknob turn and I said to myself "Oh fuck..."

Then she turns on the kitchen light, the livingroom lamp, the hallway light, screaming "Blas? Blas? ARE YOU HERE?", then comes into my bedroom and yells at me, "Wake up! Why didn't you answer my phone calls? I told my parents I was with you tonight, and my boyfriend ditched me, so now I have nothing to do!"

I told her I was sorry, I was extremely tired, I couldn't stay up any longer, and I couldn't hang out. I also said it wasn't MY fault she lied to her parents and got her plans all fucked up and now she was stuck.

I'm NEVER going to bed without locking the door again. I don't care what the situation is. And the weird thing is, I normally don't forget to lock it. I don't know why yesterday was different.

I'm not going to move my car, either. For all she can know, I got picked up and went somewhere with someone. Rrrrr.

Suffice it to say I have been in a rotten mood all day.

I don't want to hear anyone else bitch about bad friends lol.

[AFpheonix]

Who the hell did you marry... MANSON?!?!?!

No, just a mild mannered, geeky agnostic. He's the only son in law that called my mom on mother's day. Yep, he's satan, all right :lol:

[CaroPhoenix]

My husband loves to answer the phone. We have Caller ID. I can't tell you how many times he's yelled at me 'cos I've looked at the Caller ID and said "it's an unknown name/number/etc." and he still expects me to answer. :rant:

As for the door. If I'm not expecting someone, I dont' usually answer. My mom comes during the day so i can peek out the front window, not her car there? I don't answer. The peep hole is so high up, I have to use a step stool. more :rant: It drives me insane so normally I don't answer it. If hubby insists, I make him do it himself.

[Cia]

Blas I hope when you are more awake you gave your little friend the 'who and/or what the hell do you think you are' speech and scared the piss out of her.

[Dreamstalker]

{{{{Blas}}}}

She entered uninvited and unannounced, that makes it an illegal entry IMO. I'd have no problem beating the crap out of someone who did that (or calling the cops if I couldn't), friend or no.

(I'd also suggest contacting the telco about harassing phone calls, but I'm evil that way)

[CaroPhoenix]

Dear God on Mount Everest!

My mother AND sister came over today. I put Kelly down for a nap, and I ended up sleeping right along with her. All of a sudden I hear banging on my door. LOUD BANGING. Then the phone rang. I answered, it was my mother. She was calling me, talking to me on the phone AND banging on the door. I stumbled down the stairs and let them in.

They wanted to look at the baby clothes I had packed away 'cos my sister is pregnant and due in November. Oy.