How do I leave the SCs at work?

[Coconut]

I know I've been on the advice board a lot lately, but I am just very upset right now because of SCs. :cry:

What is the best way to not let if bother you? What's the best way to keep work at work, and not bring it home? Help! Any advice you can give!

[gunsage]

Honestly, my wife is not necessarily awake by the time I get home, but often she'll get on AIM a few hours before I leave. This is good because if there's any BS to get off my chest, whether it's about fellow coworkers, stupid agents, or total SCs, I can typically vent to her, no biggie. That's not to say that she always gets on, but it is helpful when you have someone to talk to that isn't associated with your work.

That's one thing that helps. If it wasn't for how damn'd late it was when I got off, I'd probably hit the bars. Instead, I often check up on myspace, play some games, and kick back a few hard drinks if I had a rough day. Having a fitness center also helps, but without a punching bag and with the fact that I only go before my shift starts, I can only really start a shift in a good mood, which helps, but isn't optimal.

When I was working as a tier 2, there was a local gym that we all had a free membership at. I beat the HELL out of that heavy bag, bare-handed if the trainer wasn't around. I learned how to bounce the bag up with simple jabs, toss it around with hooks, etc. Fun stuff. And really, it works better if you're NOT trying to envision the bag as your source of frustration, but rather acknowledge that you're doing it to vent.

Why? Because the moment you start imagining what's really making you mad is right in front of you, ESPECIALLY if it's REALLY pissing you off, that's when you lose control. After all, it's just a punching bag, so it's not like you're hurting anyone for real. As a result, you end up getting tired quicker and not attacking with any real skill.

So, I guess what I'm trying to say is that yes, there are times where you will bring your work home with you. It's important to vent, by any means necessary. What's REALLY bad is when you need to vent while on the job. That's a tricky sector.

[blas87]

You have to find the right people to vent to. People you trust. People you know won't tattle. Trust me, I've had a few coworkers go behind my back.

The time that you DO have off, use it to your advantage. Pamper yourself. Relax. Do NOT think about work. Do NOT think about customers. Have some tea. It really does help, and I hate tea.

What I do every morning since I've been training Dipshit the Impossible has been RELAX. I go tanning every other day, and on the days I don't, I take a bubble bath. Then I sleep ALL day. Then I get up and have some tea. I stretch a bit on the floor.

[smileyeagle1021]

A lot of my coworkers find comfort in the bottle... i wouldn't suggest that... my personal preference is to once in a while when i bonus or get a lot of overtime pay make the 2 hour drive to Wendover (or take the bus if i'm being a cheap bastard) and spend a day on the tables. I'll dress up in semi nice clothes, play some craps, play some blackjack, probably lose my shirt, but that is one day that I am doing something completely out of character.
Of course there is also CS.com to vent on.
Oh, and have a hobby, I for example love movies, I know where the best theatres are and have most of their schedules memorized. Always have an escape option.

[crazylegs]

It sounds odd, but it works for me.

The best way to get over a bad day is to change out of my uniform as soon as I get home, it has such a significant psycological impact to be able to physically remove all the worries/stress/strains that I rarely take my work home as it were.

[Gurndigarn]

There are a number of coping mechanisms. Some that I recommend:

* Loud music. Ideally stuff that's heavy on instruments. Try to avoid the angry-at-the-world type music (punk, thrash, etc.) when you're in this mood, though, as it might only make the situation worse. Loud classical music is generally a real good choice, as are various types of rock. Just do it in privacy (windows up in the car, headphones on at home) so you don't bug anyone around you

* Soft music. I know it sounds odd following loud music, but when you're in more of a crying mood than an angry mood, this sometimes helps. Classical, some pop, some rock, some jazz, possibly new age.

* Having someone outside of work who's willing to listen. Spouses/significant others should work well for this, or parents at times. Though it's important to find out what mood they're in BEFORE starting... sometimes they need to vent or something like that even more than you do.

As an aside, but an important one, IMO, it sucks when you come home and just want to vent to your spouse(Spouse/partner/boyfriend/girlfriend. Please fit your own nouns and pronouns in as needed), and realize that she needs comforting more than you do. However, sucking it down and supporting her at that point makes the whole relationship better in the long run. And sometimes supporting her gives you a bit of perspective that helps you put your own problems behind you.

* Pinball. Or, I would assume, some other hobby that requires focus. Though pinball is a great hobby, and you ought to give it a try. Really.

* Other activities that require activity. Generally not sitting in front of a TV, especially one with lots of downtime (AKA "commercials"). Movies possibly, since they tend to be better thought out and don't have commercials (usually, at least not after previews), but anything active is probably going to be better.

[smileyeagle1021]

Movies possibly, since they tend to be better thought out and don't have commercials (usually, at least not after previews), but anything active is probably going to be better.

on that note, for those of us not physically inclined :wave: , reading is another great release, I for example love Sci-Fi, *shameless plug for favorite author* if y'all get the chance you should read the Seafort Saga by David Feintuch, the man is a genius.

[MadonnaC]

For me, it's a First Person Shooter, God mode on, and just go on a shooting spree :eek: :p

All virtual, and the pixels get recycled for the next game :lol:

[Boozy]

I know I've been on the advice board a lot lately, but I am just very upset right now because of SCs. :cry:
What is the best way to not let if bother you? What's the best way to keep work at work, and not bring it home? Help! Any advice you can give!

I used to be the same way, and I really feel for you.

For a lot of people, blowing off some steam at the end of the day is all it takes. For me, I found that an angry or rude customer would upset me for days. All I could think about was, "What did I do wrong? What could I have said?"

Customer service is very difficult for people who are sensitive, react strongly to confrontation, or for whom approval from others is very important.

You need to realize that these people should not be important to you, as you aren't for them. They have forgotten you the second they left the store. You are allowing strangers, and rude strangers at that, to dictate your moods. You can't allow them to have that kind of power over you.

Allow yourself to replay the incident in your head once or twice ONLY. This is a valuable thing to do, especially if you did make a mistake. You'll need to learn from it.

After that, LET IT GO. If you find yourself thinking about it again, stop yourself immediately and say (aloud if you're alone): "This person is not important enough to occupy my thoughts. I have already dealt with that situation and it is over. I refuse to be upset."

Think positive thoughts! Good luck.

[Rapscallion]

To add to the advice to post it here and venting that way, I've known people say that they wrote out their post, nearly hit the post button, and realised that the effort of typing it up had gotten rid of all their tension.

This place kept me sane through the dark days of retail, which is the main reason I maintain it.

Rapscallion

[retailwrkralum]

Always good to have someone to vent to, my poor husband has gotten many earfuls from me about work! I worked in a place with a bunch of petty bitches and man were they hard to deal with. One of them happened to be my boss at the time too. I found that keeping a journal helped because it got all your feelings out, plus you could use it as documentation should you need it in the future. I used to call mine the "venting machine".

As far as customers go, put it this way, you will probably never see them again (unless they are regulars) and if they are, chances are, they won't always remember you or what happened. Clearly they forgotten all about the tiff you had with them so you should too. I realize that's easier said than done, but I figure they aren't losing sleep over their experience dealing with me, why should I lose sleep?


If all else fails, just keep telling yourself "they don't pay me enough to worry about that" or "that's no longer my problem" that's usually does the trick.

[MTNLaurelPoacher]

Not ever job is nice enough to give you a machete. Surveyors normally take out their stress by hacking and slashing trees and shrubs.

My other suggestions as to how to leave the Scs at work are to take on a physical hobby or sport. Weigh lifting, airsoft, and or a martial art tend to remove the stress that is associated with SCs. If these are cost prohibitive, walking, running, hiking, massage, and sex also help remove that stress.

[Bright_Star]

Get a video game system & a shooting game. Works wonders. ALWAYS helped me unwind when I was working at Wally World...lol.

[Gurndigarn]

Get a video game system & a shooting game. Works wonders. ALWAYS helped me unwind when I was working at Wally World...lol.

For me, it was pinball. Grab a buck, come back an hour later feeling just fine with the world. Cheapest therapy in existance, at least for me.

[Arcade Man D]

For me, it was pinball. Grab a buck, come back an hour later feeling just fine with the world. Cheapest therapy in existance, at least for me.

Pinball does have a wonderful therapeutic effect. Shame I can't find any good ones around where I am any more. (Train station which is run by a different company than the one Gurndigarn and I work for has a No Fear table, but there's just not enough open playfield for me).

[AnaKhouri]

I second the first-person shooter video game idea. Since I started working at the bookstore I have become a master at "Timesplitters: Future Perfect" and "Mortal Kombat: Armageddon" for the Wii. ;)

[Banthor the Unruly]

Get a video game system & a shooting game. Works wonders. ALWAYS helped me unwind when I was working at Wally World...lol.

It's scary but true, but it's not the portrayal of violence or acting out what I have been suppressing all day that I find satisfying about video games. When I play a video game especially a FPS It's like I am using another part of my brain. Something primal and basic. I don't think in words anymore, just thinking about staying alive and hitting my target.

The game does not even have to be violent. A simple twitch game, or a racing game. Something that requires your total attention.

But you have to be careful. Something too challenging, your anger will turn into frustration quickly. I would also avoid anything player-vs-player. Yea it's fun to wail on real people, but if you run into some idiot out there they are only going to feed your rage.

It took a few times of screaming myself horse at my monitor before I realized the benefit of gaugeing my mood before playing a game after a bad day.