**WARNING - GEEK HUMOUR AHEAD....**

[Slytovhand]

Hey gang.

I was trying to cheer up a friend who's just been dumped, and in the process I said he couldn't deal with the prestige of being with her.

So I'm going to now call her a 32nd level Duellist... High Prestige Class (for you D&D nerds - or of course, Neverwinter Nights etc...).

And I have now asked her, as a prestige class - what are her pre-requisites and bonuses?

Which I now ask you (if you will indulge the sadness of my state of mind... :D)

If you were a prestige class, what are your pre-req's and bonuses?

For the Slytovhand, I think you'd need
Class: Call Centre Operator level 6
Feats: Bad Humour, Improved Sarcasm, Resent Customer.
Skills: Rotten Puns 6 ranks, Irony 6 ranks, Sarcasm 12 ranks, Argumentativeness 12 ranks.

Bonuses - at each level, you gain +1 Save Vs Customer Whinge, Whine & Rants.
Also at 1st level, and every second level thereafter, gain Improved Night Shift Wakefulness +1.
At 3rd level, gain bonus feat: Customer Suck Riposte.


(ok- getting tired now...failed Save Vs Graveyard shift :p)

Anyone care to join my silliness??

Slyt

[Chanlin]

I couldn't just stop at prerequisites, I wrote up a whole class :)

Chanlin

HD: d6

Skill Points: (Int +6)

Class Skills: Bluff, Diplomacy, Knowledge (Cellular Phones), Profession (Call Center Rep), Sense Motive, Tumble

Prerequisites:
Skills: Bluff 6 ranks, Diplomacy 6 ranks, Sense Motive 6 ranks, Sarcasm 6 ranks
Classes: Call Center Rep: 2, Technical Support Rep: 2,
Feats: Iron Will, Improved Temper Control, Skill Emphasis (Diplomacy),

Special Feature:
Witty Retort: A Chanlin may make a number of witty retorts per day equal to their Class Skill level + Intelligence modifier.
1: Witty Bluff: A witty bluff is a special mental attack that unlike a normal bluff leaves a customer open to suggestion. On a failed saving throw vs a witty bluff a Chanlin may immediately make a suggestion as per the spell with a caster level equal to his bluff check. Targets that fail their saving throw are also completely unaware of the fact that they have been subjected to a mental attack. This uses one use of Witty Retort.

3: Scathing Sarcasm: Scathing Sarcasm is a secret attack that all Chanlin's learn from years of abuse at the hands of customers and the general public alike. This is an ability not to be used lightly, however most Chanlin's have a hard time holding back. To use this ability the Chanlin makes a Sarcasm roll DC 25. On a successful check the target must immediately make a Fortitude save DC 5 + the Chanlin's Class level + the Chanlin's wisdom modifier. On a failed save the target is immediately rendered speechless and suffers a -5 penalty on all saves vs Mental attacks. This is a supernatural ability and uses 2 uses of Witty Retort.

6: Diplomatic Tirade: An awe inspiring ability that all Chanlin's learn as a defense vs the harsh environs in which they are trained Diplomatic Tirade is a speech rendered in at such a fast pace that the target barely has time to comprehend what was said but for some reason find themselves regarding the Chanlin in a better light than before. When using tis ability the Chanlin makes a diplomacy check at a DC equal to the targets Level. On a successful check the target immediately regards the Chanlin as a friend and will cease any and all hostile acts. Furthermore the target will regard all of the Chanlins statements as advantageous and will strive to help him in any way they can that would not normally violate their alignment restrictions. A failed use of Witty Bluff or a successful use of Scathing Sarcasm will immediately render the effects of Diplomatic Tirade useless and any subsequent attempts to us this ability against that target will automatically fail. This is a supernatural mind effecting ability and can be used on targets normally immune to such abilities. This uses 3 uses of Witty Retort.

10: Logical Rebuff : The penultimate ability which represents the Chanlin's dedication to simple common sense. To use logical rebuff the Chanlin rolls a d20 + wisdom modifier with a DC equal to his targets intelligence or wisdom score whichever is higher (in most cases this will be a 5 or less). On a successful check all of the targets attempts to use any special abilities are rendered useless as the Chanlin becomes immune to them. Furthermore the skills Whine, Bluff, and Rant automatically fail when used against a Chanlin who has succeeded on a Logical Rebuff check. This uses 4 uses of Witty Retort.

[Greenday]

Greenday

Class: Logistical Wizard Intern - Level 1
Feats: Quick Typing, Understand Technology, BSing.
Skills: Surfing the Web Level 10. Hear Boss Coming Level 5. Logistics Level 3.

Bonuses: At each level, grows more adept at sneaking around the office and taking longer lunches without being noticed.