Talking to strangers' babies/kids: Yea or nay?

[ShinyGreenApple]

Every few months or so, my Mom and I get into heated arguments and rifts over this. She's one of those people who *loves* babies and small kids. Of any kind, it doesn't matter. When we're in stores or out in public (church, etc) she is constantly waving at and going up to complete strangers and talking to their babies in the carts and strollers, or making a comment to us along the lines of "Aww, babies!" "Look at the little baby in the little dress!" or "Aww, babies are so cuuuutte!"

*gag*

Frankly, this embarrasses the hell out of me, and that's where she comes in and gets mad, saying I have no right to act that way and she'll talk to babies if she wants to.

I, on the other hand, am the kind of person who, when it comes to babies, I really, really couldn't care less. To me, there's nothing very special about them, since everyone was one at one time or another, and just about everybody has figured out how to reproduce. Now, I'm sure that if, heaven forbid, I have little ones of my own someday, I'll feel differently about them. Because they'd be mine, you know? But as for other peoples', eew. I'm sorry, as I don't mean to offend anyone, but that's just how I am, and how I always have been. When I was small, I played with stuffed animals or little plastic animal figures and wouldn't touch a doll with a ten foot pole if you paid me.

Back to the issue at hand, though, what is everyone's opinion on people like my Mom who insist on talking and waving and making noises at every child under 3 that comes into their 'radar'. Do you think this is weird and/or embarrassing? For those of you who are parents, does it make you uncomfortable when complete strangers insist on talking to your children?

[Norton]

I, on the other hand, am the kind of person who, when it comes to babies, I really, really couldn't care less. To me, there's nothing very special about them
*snip*
When I was small, I played with stuffed animals or little plastic animal figures and wouldn't touch a doll with a ten foot pole if you paid me.

... are you my long lost sister, or something? I feel the same way about babies, and was the same way about dolls. Also, my mom acts exactly like yours when it comes to other people's babies.

When I was younger, her behavior used to bother me. Then again, everything my mother did when I was a teenager embarrassed me. Now when my mom starts cooing at stranger's kids, I just kind of roll my eyes and ignore it. She and I are different in many ways, and this is just one of them. As long as the parents of the babies don't mind (they usually seem to enjoy the compliments), I don't think it's my place to dictate her behavior.

Yes, I think it's weird, but my mom's harmless, so no big deal.

[ShinyGreenApple]

... are you my long lost sister, or something? I feel the same way about babies, and was the same way about dolls.

Well, I'm adopted, and I know without a doubt that I have at least half a dozen siblings and half-siblings roaming the earth somewhere, so it's a possibility ;)

Now when my mom starts cooing at stranger's kids, I just kind of roll my eyes and ignore it.

That's all I did in today's case (were were in the Wal-Mart parking lot, God help me), and maybe start walking a little faster to get away from the awkwardness, and I got chewed out halfway home for 'snapping'. I can't make her understand that it's one of those 'equal reaction' kind of things. Sure, go ahead and fuss over something you find appealing that I find repelling, but I'll go right ahead and get embarrassed, just like you did the time I walked around in the store wearing work pants and a sleeveless undershirt and you thought it was indecent. And for the record, the shirt was not see-through, I had a bra on, and I had the figure to get away with it :p

[Aethian]

Nope I don't think it's weird. And if the parent of said cute child doesn't mind the attention I don't see a problem with it. Of course I'm ones of those who likes to coo over babies.

[Sliceanddice]

i hated dolls too but i love babies

[AdminAssistant]

Now if I see a little toddler in a store just being adorable, I may smile. I've come across a few that'll say, "HIIII!!!", and I'll usually reply. Because that's just cute. I also have a 3 year old nephew (Monster - see pic) that I love to pieces, so I'm biased.

But babies to me just aren't that interesting. They eat, crap, and sleep. I don't even think they're that pretty/cute. It's when they get personalities that kids get interesting and fun.

[Kheldarson]

I'm one of the people who, if behind a small child/baby in the store, will smile and wave a bit to said child. Just to make them smile. I don't talk to them unless they approach me first. But that's me and it keeps me amused.

[clod75]

I sing the alphabet or twinkle twinkle to babies/toddlers when they cry or are restless (giving mom and dad a bad time) and I am working...

but that is to distract them.

Out and about I think it's ok to smile and say hiya to little ones, but I don't think people should get too cozy and start playing and cooing nonsense, it's weird to me.

I also have four (cute :p) kids, and I don't care for when some granny comes up and starts touching their hair or cheeks and always wanting to know their names.

But that's just me.

[Ree]

I love babies and children.
I don't know why. I think it might be that everything they are experiencing is new to them and I love seeing that look on their face.

I will smile at babies and wave and get them to interact.

One thing I do not do, though, is touch someone else's baby.
For one thing, if I see them in a store, my hands are dirty and there is no way I am spreading those germs to some innocent little child.

*Gratuitous grandmother bragging rights:

When I am out with my granddaughter, she gets a lot of attention. She's a beautiful child, really. She has these huge blue eyes that seem to just look right through a person.
She has a way of making even grumpy old hearts just melt. I'm not saying that because she's mine, either. I have seen it happen so many times, and it amazes me every time. I was at a meeting the other night, and had no choice but to take her with me, as her Mom was called in to work, and there was nobody to watch the baby at the last minute.

I could not believe the number of people who picked her up and hugged her. There were at least 3 elderly men that I know, and they always seemed to me to be a bit grumpy and having no interest in children. Every single one of them played with her and picked her up.

She warms up to a lot of people, and never makes strange, but there have been some friends of the girls hanging around, who can only be described as having "questionable" character, and some people we have met in public that really aren't on my list of favourite people because they aren't all that nice. They have made a fuss over the baby and picked her up. She almost seems to know instinctively that these people aren't nice, because she doesn't smile at them or do any of the coy little things that she does with other people.

There are other people who have been going through a rough time, or who need just a little bit of 'loving', and she goes right to them and gives them hugs and kisses.
Like I said, it absolutely amazes me when I see it.

Someone mentioned the idea to me that she may be an "Indigo" or "Crystal" child, but I really don't know much about that.

*Enough bragging....Back to actual topic of thread

[Kiwi]

when im out and I see a kid upset, I start making funny faces at it

the look they get is a cross between haha funny and who the heck are you!?!?!?!

it usually distracts them enough that they stop crying or grizzling

when its a happy kid I could care less, but when they are upset I dont like seeing that
I think its fine as long as the parents are good about you speaking to their kid

[Bright_Star]

I don't have any kids but if I did & a complete stranger walked up to me & my kid & started talking to the kid then I'd get on the defensive in a real hurry & scream at them to "Leave my kid alone!"
Nowadays you just don't know the kind of person who starts talking to a kid that they never met. You don't know their intentions or even if they're harmless or some psychopath on the prowl. When it comes to children you can't be too carefull.
I'd rather be rude & tell somebody off even if they mean no harm than to just stay quiet & put up with some stranger who you have no idea what they're up to. Better safe than sorry.

[blas]

I love babies, but in general can't stand toddlers and little kids. However, I try to be a decent, polite person out in public even when things are going crappy, and I'll smile at a kid. I just really don't care to interact with them...but if there's a little kid in a cart and I'm passing by, I'll smile...but most of the time I just shyly smile at people out and about unless I'm in a really, really bad mood.

I've always loved babies and can't figure out why. I have no desire to ever have one, but I love to hold and play with babies. Just not strangers' babies.

[BookstoreEscapee]

If I catch a little kids' eye, I'll wave and say hi to them, but that's about it. I don't touch strange children (unless they are running around and run into me, in which case - not so cute). Even with people I know, I won't just pick up their kids without permission. I ran into a guy I used to work with at Target last week, and he was with his wife and baby (about 6 months old). If the baby had been awake I might have touched her hand (I love it when they grab your finger - that reflex grip is amazing) but unless offered I would not ask to hold her or anything. She was asleep, anyway, and I would never wake up someone's kid.

[ShinyGreenApple]

Hmm. Well, maybe it's just me, although in Mom's defense, she doesn't touch stranger's kids, she just talks and waves.

I appreciate all the feedback, and I do sincerely hope I haven't offended anyone. It's just one of those weird things that gets under my skin, you know? :)

[RecoveringKinkoid]

Doesn't bother me if strangers admire or talk to my child. They do it all the time, she's beautiful and chariming, they can't help themselves. ;) :lol: Of course, I may be a bit biased with that opinion, you know.

Seriously, though, I don't mind.

I mean, I don't think I'd like it much if anyone tried to paw at her or give her something without my permission, but just to speak to her or admire her, no, I dont see any harm in that.

I am friendly and southern, and am very comfortable talking to strangers, so that may have something to do with it. I realize that that seems to be a mostly southern thing, strangers striking up conversations with each other.

[Greenday]

I don't really like babies or toddlers. Once they develop their personality, then they aren't bad.

Honestly, the only kids I like are my little cousins. The six year old is a terror though. Not like a horrible kid that curses and is really violent. More just doesn't listen at all. Maybe not even just not listening. He listens. But then he grins. And then he does it anyway. For instance, "Jay, don't throw that ball out of the pool." *cue smirk and throws ball out of the pool*. He's a lil too rough too. Likes to play rough with me and my 16 year old cousin. Like punching us rough. And he's decently strong for his age. Always full of energy which isn't that great. Luckily, ever since we got a Wii, we just have him play with that. I swear though, once he gets tired, he is the sweetest kid EVER.

And his little brother, my godson, he's 2. And despite me hating kids that age, I still love him to death. Always have to keep an eye on him though. He tries to escape. Whenever he's over, I lock the front door. Why? Because unlocking it makes noise so I can actually here him leaving. He's much too clever to let something silly like a lock stop him. He does it at daycare too. Drives them crazy. They've threatened to kick him out of daycare if he keeps unlocking the door and leaving. They just can't spend all day watching him and not the other kids. A couple weeks ago, he climbed the fence and walked away without anyone noticing for a bit. Luckily he didn't go too far.

Sigh. Kids.

[Aramika]

I, on the other hand, am the kind of person who, when it comes to babies, I really, really couldn't care less.
*snip*
When I was small, I played with stuffed animals or little plastic animal figures and wouldn't touch a doll with a ten foot pole if you paid me.


... are you my long lost sister, or something? I feel the same way about babies, and was the same way about dolls.

:wave: I'm like you two, while my friends were playing with dolls and Barbies, I was playing with stuffed animals.

And LadyB, it's not just you. I don't wave or talk to little kids when I see then when I'm out shopping or whatever. I dunno why, I just don't.

[iradney]

It depends on my mood on the day really. Some days I'll ignore them, and other days, I make funny faces, smile and wave with my fingers. Never touch though.

[Imogene]

If I notice a kid, or a baby staring at me, I will usually turn to the nearest adult and say, "Yeah, my height tends to scare kids..." and kneel down so I'm not so frightening to the kid, possibly wave, depends on the gender I'm rocking hard at the time. Male? Eh, I've had my fill of kids through twenty years of in home daycare. Female? "Aww, lookit the cute little munchkin... playing... 'Saw'? *hurp*"

[Becks]

I'm one of the people who, if behind a small child/baby in the store, will smile and wave a bit to said child. Just to make them smile. I don't talk to them unless they approach me first. But that's me and it keeps me amused.

I'm like that, too.

I like babies and small children, and they seem to like me.

[ShinyGreenApple]

:wave: I'm like you two, while my friends were playing with dolls and Barbies, I was playing with stuffed animals.



You know how most girls will start taking a little interest in the opposite sex around 13? Dad I guess took advantage of my tomboyishness and love for animals and bought me a horse. I wonder if that was intentional now to keep me distracted :roll:

Oh well. Horses are better anyways :D

[Gravekeeper]

No interest in babies. Will not interact with stranger's children unless they start it. Even then I try to ignore them because I have testicles so I'm obviously a child molester.



Oh well. Horses are better anyways :D

As a horse owning girlfriend of mine once on the appeal of horseback riding: "Because I get to have a large, sweaty beast between my legs."

;p

[rdp78]

I do like little kids and babies but I'm not quite sure if I want one after working in retail. Anyway I sometimes will interact with a baby or tot but just briefly and I make sure the parents aren't creeped out. Like when a little one is trying to talk and I usely "Are we making noises?" in a high pitch voice. The only time I don't interact is when they are sleeping or the parent might be overprotective. I sometimes make a comment on them to their parents especially babies. Now if the child is in a cranky mood I might try to help the parent calm them down or I might make comment about someone isn't happy. However, I do avoid touching a child and do interact with the parent.

OT: I also try to do the same with dogs and their owners. Since I got a dog of my own I love seeing other dogs and petting them (they usually can tell I have a dog). I also talk to the owners about their dogs and I tell them about my dog (sometimes I asked if we can switched :lol: well, not realy). However, I never bother a working or service dog as well as a dog who wants to bit me but I do interact with the owners/handlers.

[Rapscallion]

Will not interact with stranger's children unless they start it. Even then I try to ignore them because I have testicles so I'm obviously a child molester.


Beat me to answering with that one.

Rapscallion

[RetailWorkhorse]

I don't talk to kids, I don't look at them, I don't do anything to them. If a kid starts talking to me (outside of work) I turn my back and start signing to whomever I'm with.

I am not allowed to mess with children.

I break their little brains. :devil:

And I seriously don't like kids.

[Lace Neil Singer]

Oscar the Grouch signing on here; apart from the various kids that are either related to me, or are spawned from my friends, I dislike all children. I will ignore any who try to talk to me outside work; if they persist, I will walk away. I get the repeated urge, suppressed, to trip up kids who are running madly about so I feel it's best if I remove myself from the situation.

Strangely enough, I once had a brilliant conversation at work with a kid of around eight years old about dinosaurs. His mother told me he had Aspergers; I replied, "So do I." ^^ Dinos being one of my obsessions and all. XD

[Rapscallion]

I'd like to point out that I don't particularly dislike children. I just want to avoid any risk of being accused of liking them too much.

Rapscallion

[Lace Neil Singer]

Yeah; I like kids...


...


...


...


I just couldn't eat a whole one. :rimshot:

[PizzaDrone]

I've never really been a "kid" person. So much noise, so much mess and all. Also, I work in a restaurant, which is arguably where kids are at their worst (depending on the parent's usually though). Recently I've spent time around a friend's two year old and I feel a lot more comfortable around them. I realise now that I didn't interact with them out of fear. Fear that I didn't know what to do. Now that I do, I'm far more comfortable with smiling at babies at tables. But if one cries, all I'll do is say to the parents, "Oh dear, someone's not happy". As for absolute strangers...no, unless the kid looks. Even then its just a little smile then carry on. Wouldn't go out of my way to get to a kid.