View Full Version : My Christmas "Vacation"

01-05-2010, 05:01 AM

- My family is seriously falling apart, but it has been for some time. Dad's drinking more, Mom's stopped trying to get him to quit, and my sister ignores the problem. I've just had to try to stop caring so much. I don't worry about Dad, because, hey, he's doing this to himself, so if he gets a horrible liver disease then, well, he should've got help for his alcoholism. I worry about Mom and quite frankly, I'd wish they'd get a divorce. I know that probably sounds heartless and cruel, but I have to live my own life, and not get caught up in the horrible family cycle of alcoholism/prescription abuse.

- I planned my 'escape' for today....and last night a big snowstorm blocked my usual path home. However, I was determined to make it to my apartment, so I went the slightly longer way on interstate highways away from the storm. It was nice to go a different way, but 75 mph for 8 hours is rough on car and driver. I want to give my poor baby some STP or high test gas for not giving me any trouble on the trip. Well, one of my windshield washer squirters is blocked again, but that's easily fixed.

- In spite of everything, I did have a pretty nice Christmas. I got some things I really needed, including a Mini Dell and some snow boots. The kids and my parents loved the presents I got them. I got to actually see my step-niece for once; she rarely visits her dad, my BIL, anymore. Not sure what's going on there... I got to spend a lot of quality time with my nephew. He's 4 and awesome. Such a pistol and has got quite the imagination.

- The biggie....

Well, I met a guy, H, my senior year of college (5 years ago). We lived on the same dorm floor and were part of a big group of friends that hung out a lot (and drank alot. H and I went out once, but I didn't want it to go anywhere since we had so many mutual friends. A few years later, we started talking on Messenger, met up for dinner and nothing happened. We lost touch until several months ago, when we started chatting on Messenger again. H has really been a godsend and has been very supportive about all the family drama I've been dealing with. He had planned to come visit me in November, but couldn't get the time off work. (Oh, for the record, he currently lives in Arkansas.) So, since I was in state for the holidays, I decided to visit him on New Year's Eve.

Wow. We hit it off nearly immediately, although it took him to almost midnight to make anything that resembled a move. (More than made up for it later! :angel: ) He's going to visit in a few weeks, and then we'll decide if we want to give this a serious try. I want to, but I am scared to death. I've never done a long-distance relationship and this is the first time in a very very long time that I've been with someone so sweet and caring and serious...we talked on the phone tonight and I had to explain some of my past and why I sometimes shy away from romantic talk. After being treated like crap (or a whore) so many times, I don't know how to deal with being treated like a princess. It freaks me out, and I don't know how to react.

There is one problem - a medical one. He has some kind of inflammation or something that's causing severe abdominal pain. Of course, his insurance for his job doesn't kick in for a few more weeks, and since he's seen a doctor for this before the insurance probably won't cover it anyway (preexisting condition). I think I finally convinced him to go to the ER and get it checked out. Maybe they'll at least give him some pain meds... :( Of course, the hospital bill may mean that it will be longer before he can visit, but he has to take care of himself first. (As much as I want to see him again.....)

It's been a roller coaster of a break, and I'm very glad classes don't start until the 14th. I need a vacation after this vacation!