My resume any good?

[Plaidman]

I just copied and paste. But I'll take any suggestions or ideas. Please.




PLAIDMAN
ADDRESS
PHONE NUMBER

SUMMARY





QUALIFICATIONS
•I feel that I'm best qualified because I'm reliable to come in at any hour, weekends, holidays and overtime.
•
•I have great customer service skills, can easily work with even the most aggressive customers with whatever problems they may have.
•
•I can work both by myself and with others with no problems.




WORK EXPERIENCE

2004 - Current
Assistant Manager
Plaid Pantries Inc.
Portland, OR


I greeted and helped serve customers with their purchases and make them feel welcome at the neighborhood store. I both checked in and put away freight from various vendors in a orderly time. I cleaned the floors, coffee pots, shelves and windows. I did paperwork on weekends and whenever manager was sick. I came in at any time a shift couldn't be covered, and would work overtime to make sure the store functioned.

•I was given a written commendation from my district manager for my viligence on inventory, managing to catch most shoplifters and/or employee's mistakes.
•
•I was given a diamond pin for my fives years of service.
•
•I've worked under four different managers for long term, and each would gave rave reviews, and urged me to be a manager. I once had two managers fight to have me in their stores. Several customers would call our corporate number to give me compliments on my service and pleasant attutide.


1999 - 2001
Envelope Stuffer
Qualex
Portland, OR


I was a freelancer that stuffed several thousands of envelopes that was to be held with pictures from Kodak to customers.


EDUCATION


2010 - 2012 Everest Community Collage
Still Attending
Portland, OR



2001 - 2002 Portland Community Collage
None
Portland, OR



2001 SE Works GED program
GED
Portland, OR



2000 - 2000 Franklin High School

[Jester]

One thing you need to remember is that a resume is nothing more than a tool to get you an interview. Period, end of story.

That being said, could yours be cleaned up? Sure. If you want, I can help clean it up and make it snazzier. (My mom taught me really, really well on such things.) I'll PM you my email address...if you're interested, email me a copy of your res.

[Jack]

Remember first that I've never actually hired anyone and may not know as much as I think I do.


QUALIFICATIONS
•I feel that I'm best qualified because I'm reliable to come in at any hour, weekends, holidays and overtime.


Redundant. We already know that your flexibility is a qualification. See, it says QUALIFICATIONS right above it. Try "I'm available to work any hours, including weekends, holidays, and overtime." or some such.


•I have great customer service skills, can easily work with even the most aggressive customers with whatever problems they may have.


This struck me as an empty statement. It seems to provide no elaboration on why you think you have great customer service skills, or what those skills are. Try listing a few of your strong points. I might mention my experience in phone manner, conflict deescalation, and note-taking.

Also, that's a comma splice. You need to construct it like one of these (not all-inclusive):
I have great customer service skills and can easily work with even the most aggressive customers. [I recommend leaving the rest off -- an aggressive customer obviously has a problem and repeating "with" stands out as awkward.]

I have great customer service skills; I can easily work with even the most aggressive customers.

I have great customer service skills, easily working with even the most aggressive customers.

etc.


•I can work both by myself and with others with no problems.


Good to know. I might suggest phrasing more along the lines of "Works well both in a team and unsupervised." I'll elaborate on that later.


•I was given a written commendation from my district manager for my viligence on inventory, managing to catch most shoplifters and/or employee's mistakes.


1. Vigilance.

2. You have two separate ideas in the same clause: Catching shoplifters and catching employees' inventory errors. [Also, yes, it should be employees' as the apostrophe goes after the s in a plural possessive (unless the word is already plural such as in "children's"] This is confusing, even if grammatical. I suggest: "I was given a written commendation from my district manager for my vigilance in keeping inventory [or however you might best phrase that in the industry], discovering most of the errors and shrinkage*."

3. You don't manage to do anything. Makes it seem like you had a hard time of it.

*Best not to phrase it so that it's accusatory toward people (even in general). Just a CYA.

This bit is kind of petty, really, but you can't afford to make anyone think you lack the intelligence and diligence to write a grammatical resume.


•I was given a diamond pin for my fives years of service.


That's nice. Who cares what the pin was made of? If I were reading this resume as a hiring manager I would wonder what made you mention that. I might settle on ego. :( Maybe you should just mention that you received commendation for five years of service. Not "fives". :P


•I've worked under four different managers for long term, and each would gave rave reviews, and urged me to be a manager. I once had two managers fight to have me in their stores. Several customers would call our corporate number to give me compliments on my service and pleasant attutide.


Merriam-Webster lists "rave" as a noun and verb, not an adverb or adjective. A resume is not the place for colloquial use such as "rave reviews". I suggest: "I've worked under four different managers, [who each/each of whom] gave me excellent performance reviews and urged me to become a manager." (the list of "and"s makes it seem like a run-on. Again, even if it's strictly grammatical, we want to avoid the sense that it isn't, because many people like to think they know English grammar better than they really do). Also, I'm not sure it's entirely vital to mention that the managers were long-term. Most managers are, I assume, or they wouldn't have been around long enough to get there. Work it in if you feel like it though.

Note that one noun definition of "rave" is "an extravagantly favorable criticism" but this does not function the way you've tried to use it, as far as I know.


I was a freelancer that stuffed several thousands of envelopes that was to be held with pictures from Kodak to customers.


"I was a freelancer who stuffed several thousand envelopes that were to be held with pictures from Kodak to its customers."

If it's a person, use "who".
If it's a non-person, use "that".
[animals depend on context].

"several thousands of envelopes" seems like a cross between "several thousand" and a vague "thousands". I suggest picking one.

Envelopes is plural. [lol see wut i did thar] Use "were".

I don't understand the sentence. Do you mean, "I was a freelancer who stuffed several thousand envelopes with pictures sent from Kodak to its customers."?


2010 - 2012 Everest Community Collage
Still Attending
Portland, OR


Learning what? How is it relevant to the position or your general life skill?

I said I would elaborate on that phrasing later. I feel that it's best to avoid writing a resume in the first person. Even if you're only factually reporting your qualifications, the person reading it is a human with emotions and whims, and this can easily come off as egotistic. Writing it in the third person as if objectively reporting someone else's performance seems better for appearing neutral. Again, this is petty, but CYA.

Remember that I was very pedantic here because they will too.

[r2cagle]

Pedantic bit here..

Rather than 3 bullet items of qualifications, you want to make a summary paragraph or statement that stands out, explains who you are and makes you shine. Then list those qualifications as part of your work experience.

For example:

Summary paragraph/statement might say...
I am looking for employment that utilizes the skills and talents that I have learned and affords me the opportunity to continue to develop new skills.

Then under work experience make all that stuff either bullet points or short paragraphs.

Most Recent Job:
blah blah information, years worked, etc.

As a clerk/cashier, I greeted and served customers, and dealt with required paperwork such as (list the two most important reports). I have learned the value of working side by side with coworkers as well as being productive whenever working alone.

As assistant manager, I was often asked to cover a manager shift, and I had to be discreet and productive despite the increased duties.

Part of my duties included keeping the store clean and tidy, put away freight and maintain inventory. Multi-tasking and flexibility were a requirement in this job, and these skills continue to be used as I attend college.

I did receive numerous commendations from both customers and management. It was especially gratifying to be complimented on my vigilence to inventory accuracy. I have also learned that I am capable of providing excellent customer service regardless of circumstances.


*okay.. I'm out of time, but do the same on the envelope stuffing job, or I'll get back and edit this post. You obviously don't have to use the same wording, but it's just to show how you can imply the same things without having to get into details. *

[Magpie]

Over all, I think you might want to try using a more formal voice in your resume. What you have written is written using the same language that you'd use to talk to us about what happened. This isn't what employers are looking for. Be more formal, try to avoid the first person.

Use action words in your job descriptions, and make each point about what you did also cover a skill. If all of your particular qualifications for the specific job can be covered by previous work experience, then you can skip the "qualifications" section.

The feeling I'm getting from reading this is that you're trying to put too much into the resume. Descriptions of how good a job you did belong more in the cover letter and the interview. A resume generally focuses on hard skills. Make sure to list anything that was above and beyond that you did. If there's an award you got (long service not so much) that you feel really needs to be mentioned in your resume, put an "awards" section. (By the way, I'm assuming that "diamond" is the name your company gave the pin. A more generic name can be more useful.)

For your education section: For the current degree, put

"Candidate for [degree name]"

For example, our co-op resumes all contained

"Candidate for Bachelor of Applied Science, Honours Mechatronics Engineering, Co-op"


For previous ones, because your studies haven't been linear, don't feel the need to include "none". List your time there as "Candidate for". If you had received the degree, it would be listed on your resume. (It's like listing a job - during that time you were working as a student). Since you're listing your GED it's not 100% necessary to list the high school you went to. (And once you get your degree, you don't list high school at all).

[tropicsgoddess]

I would suggest putting your education information above your experience and also to try this date format for the school you're currently attending and put in the major you're studying for too, especially if it's applicable for the job you're applying for:

2010- Present
Everest Community College
Portland, OR


The I's are redundant to be honest, try this:

WORK EXPERIENCE

2004 - Current
Assistant Manager
Plaid Pantries Inc.
Portland, OR


Greeted and helped serve customers with their purchases. Checked in and put away freight from various vendors in an orderly and timely manner.Cleaned the floors, coffee pots, shelves and windows. I did paperwork on weekends and whenever manager was sick. Worked whenever shifts could not be covered and worked overtime to make sure the store functioned.


These should be on your application and also highlight these as your achievements :

•I was given a written commendation from my district manager for my diligence on inventory, managing to catch most shoplifters and/or employee's mistakes.
•
•I was given a diamond pin for my fives years of service.
•
•I've worked under four different managers for long term, and each would gave rave reviews, and urged me to be a manager. I once had two managers fight to have me in their stores. Several customers would call our corporate number to give me compliments on my service and pleasant attitude.

Great stuff on the qualifications, but too redundant with the I's. Try this:

QUALIFICATIONS
•Able to come in and work any shift including, nights, weekends and holidays.
•
•Great customer service, communication and problem solving skills.
•
•Able to work well in both independent and collaborative environments.

The summary is pretty much your objective is in terms of jobs and careers and what you're looking for .

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

I'd get rid of the I's--I am, I was, I did, etc. Not that I've read too many resumes in my time, but I've never seen one written in that manner.

Instead of:QUALIFICATIONS
•I feel that I'm best qualified because I'm reliable to come in at any hour, weekends, holidays and overtime.
•
•I have great customer service skills, can easily work with even the most aggressive customers with whatever problems they may have.
•
•I can work both by myself and with others with no problems.

I would probably phrase that as:
QUALIFICATIONS

Flexible availability
Outstanding customer service skills
Ability to work independently and in a group



Additionally, if the job you're applying for is a customer-facing one, like a pharmacy tech or some such, I'd consider dropping "outstanding customer service skills" from the qualifications. In that position, good customer service skills aren't really something that set you apart from the other applicants. It's a basic requirement of the job. You could mention communication and problem-solving skills in its place.


I greeted and helped serve customers with their purchases and make them feel welcome at the neighborhood store. I both checked in and put away freight from various vendors in a orderly time. I cleaned the floors, coffee pots, shelves and windows. I did paperwork on weekends and whenever manager was sick. I came in at any time a shift couldn't be covered, and would work overtime to make sure the store functioned.

Here's how I would phrase this:

Greeted and served customers. Checked in and stocked merchandise from numerous vendors. Performed cleaning and maintenance tasks. Completed and filed paperwork such as (a few of the most important reports you dealt with). Served as manager on duty as needed.

This part:


•I was given a written commendation from my district manager for my diligence on inventory, managing to catch most shoplifters and/or employee's mistakes.

I would phrase more compactly as:

Received written commendation from district manager for reducing shrinkage

Remember, the resume should focus on hard skills that are relevant to the job. The interview is where you can more into detail.

[Der Cute]

Remember, Plaidy, that resumes are read by hiring managers AFTER they get thru HR/screening.
The person reading it is doing so at 7:30 AM after 2 hours of sleep and they're f'in tired. They have no time or brainpower to digest words. They want short, concise, bullets, easy font.

The pp's are good so far. Less I's, write in the 3rd person, use corporate speak (Received written commendation from district manager for reducing shrinkage; Given outstanding reviews due to my 5 years of service .) (being there for 5 years, with the other "good job" you got, is enough to imply you're a kick ass worker).

You can also take your resume up to your state Job Center; they're paid to help you spiff up your resume. Just don't expect them to type it up for you. Go in with your draft, ask them to be brutally honest, and let them red-pen it all over.

Also, if you're looking for other job - do you have a copy of the DM's recommendation? And can your boss give you a rec letter? (offer to type one up for them and have them sign it)

C

[Primer]

Tropicsgoddess was the only one to catch it in passing, but under Education, you attend college, NOT collage.

[Seshat]

Post the updated resume after all these corrections, and we'll see if it projects the Awesome that is Plaidman. :)

[Plaidman]

Post the updated resume after all these corrections, and we'll see if it projects the Awesome that is Plaidman. :)




Doubt it would. I'm way out of my field with this, and feel like an idiot. I never had to do a resume, and I just used a online one. I still doubt it workable. Even as manager, I rarely saw these, and just saw applications. I mean in six years, I maybe saw 4 resumes on top of applications.





QUALIFICATIONS
•I'm available to work any hours, including weekends, holidays, and overtime.
•I have great customer service skills and can easily work with even the most aggressive customers.
•Works well both in a team and unsupervised.




WORK EXPERIENCE

2004 - Current
Assistant Manager
Plaid Pantries Inc.
Portland, OR


Greeted and helped serve customers with their purchases. Checked in and put away freight from various vendors in an orderly and timely manner.Cleaned the floors, coffee pots, shelves and windows. I did paperwork on weekends and whenever manager was sick. Worked whenever shifts could not be covered and worked overtime to make sure the store functioned.

•Received written commendation from district manager for reducing shrinkage.
•
•Received commendation for five years of service.


1999 - 2001
Envelope Stuffer
Qualex
Portland, OR


I was a freelancer who stuffed several thousand envelopes that were to be held with pictures from Kodak to its customers


EDUCATION


2010 - 2012 Everest Community Collage
Still Attending
Portland, OR



2001 - 2002 Portland Community Collage
None
Portland, OR



2001 SE Works GED program
GED
Portland, OR



2000 - 2000 Franklin High School
Portland, OR

[r2cagle]

QUALIFICATIONS

• Available to work any hours, including weekends, holidays, and overtime
• Superior customer service skills with even the most difficult customers
• Work well in both team and solo shifts
• Motivated self-starter, not content to only achieve the minimum required
• Some management experience



WORK EXPERIENCE

2004 - Current
Assistant Manager
Plaid Pantries Inc.
Portland, OR


• Greeted and served customers
• Checked and put away freight from vendors in an orderly and timely manner.
• Cleaned floors, coffee pots, shelves and windows.
• Completed necessary paperwork on weekends and whenever manager was sick.
• Worked shifts of all hours to ensure proper coverage.
• Received written commendation from district manager for reducing shrinkage.
• Excellent work reviews from managers and customers



1999 - 2001
Envelope Stuffer
Qualex
Portland, OR

• Freelanced stuffing several thousand held envelopes from Kodak with customer's pictures.
• Maintained a high weekly average of completed work.



EDUCATION


2010 - 2012
Everest Community College
Portland, OR
(put what degree you are working toward here)


2001 - 2002
Portland Community Collage
Portland, OR


2001
SE Works GED program
Portland, OR
Obtained GED



REFERENCES??



Just buffed up what you had and maintained the bullet theme. The one thing I'm wondering about... if you say that you are willing to work anytime, any shift... how is that going to work with your school schedule? Your education is listed as ongoing to 2012... but if you have a work shift that interferes with an important test, it would be better to state under qualifications:
Mostly flexible hours and shifts if worked around collegiate schedule. Willing to put in overtime as needed.


Also, do you have any personal references? I assumed not, since you didn't put it in... but if you can get a reference from say another manager at a different store then you can add a 'references available upon request' at the bottom. Maybe one work and one character reference? Doesn't hurt to try for that. And there is probably a lot more you can add to this resume that others will probably see.

Well, if you like it, great, if not... doesn't hurt my feelings. You should realize, I have a million opinions... :) I really hope for you good luck with the job hunt!

P.S. I keep coming back and re-editing this... so read it very carefully. I'm not sure I caught all my mistakes.
Oh, and I would put your name, address and contact phone numbers at the top left and keep all this on one page. So delete extra rows evenly, as needed.

[Seshat]

Modified it for you:

QUALIFICATIONS
• Available to work any hours, including weekends, holidays, and overtime.
• Possesses great customer service skills and can easily work with even the most aggressive customers.
• Works well both in a team and unsupervised.


WORK EXPERIENCE

2004 - Current
Assistant Manager
Plaid Pantries Inc.
Portland, OR

Greeted and helped serve customers with their purchases.
Checked in and put away freight from various vendors in an orderly and timely manner.
Cleaned the floors, coffee pots, shelves and windows.
Did administrative work on weekends and whenever manager was sick.
Worked whenever shifts could not be covered and worked overtime to make sure the store functioned.

•Received written commendation from district manager for reducing shrinkage.
•Received commendation for five years of service.

(2001-2002: College, see below)

1999 - 2001
Envelope Stuffer
Qualex
Portland, OR

Stuffed several thousand envelopes that were to be held with pictures from Kodak to its customers


EDUCATION


2010 - 2012 Everest Community College
Still Attending
Portland, OR



2001 - 2002 Portland Community College
Portland, OR



2001 SE Works GED program
GED
Portland, OR



2000 - 2000 Franklin High School
Portland, OR

---------------------------------------------

Did you only do the high school for one year? If so, I'd consider just leaving it off entirely.

What have you learned from working at Plaid Pantry? Especially, what have you learned about how a business works?

What did you learn during the envelope stuffing job?

What hobbies do you have?

What additional skills do you have?

What has life taught you?
(Including things you've learned through your medical problems. I've learned a great deal about who I am, and about being patient and gradually wearing away at problems. I've got a LOT more stick-to-it-iveness than I ever did.)


Edit to add: some of r2cagle's changes are better than mine. A blend of both would be best.

[It's me]

Lot's of great input here. Once thing I haven't seen: Don't just put down what you did... put down the value you added by doing it. (Yeah, the dreaded "value add"!)

Think of your audience, and think what they care about/ want in am employee: Self starter, is reliable, understands the needs of the business, pitches in when needed / pulls own weight, supports manager (it's great if you can find something that you did that made your manager or your work team stand out).

A few examples.


Greeted and helped serve customers with their purchases.

Greeted and helped customers with their purchases to ensure that shopping experience was awesome [okay, need better phrasing, but you get the idea]



Checked in and put away freight from various vendors in an orderly and timely manner.
Cleaned the floors, coffee pots, shelves and windows.

... to ensure a clean well organized store etc. etc.



Did administrative work on weekends and whenever manager was sick.

Was responsible for ensuring accurate timely completion of admin tasks on weekends and other times manager was not on shift.


Worked whenever shifts could not be covered and worked overtime to make sure the store functioned.

^^ This one, you got right! Except I would add in "to ensure proper coverage" or similar... need to emphasize that your efforts made the store operate better.

[Jester]

Plaid, you never contacted me, but I figured what the fuck, and went ahead and kind of did up a resume for you. Using my own as a template (one I worked DAYS on, thank you very much), I spent a little time working yours up.

PM me your email and I'll send you a copy.

Some things I did specifically were play up your strengths, play down your weaknesses, make it look more professional, make it sound more professional, and condense it somewhat. I can't repeat it enough...a resume is simply a tool for you to get an interview, pure and simple. Nothing more. So it doesn't have to be overly fancy or contain extraneous information. Towards that, on the one I made up for you, I eliminated mention of the GED or your one year in high school, and focused on your college experience.

All three of my parents worked in corporate America for decades, two of them dealing specifically with stuff such as this. And their advice to me, and mine to you, is the old "KISS": Keep It Simple, Stupid.

PM me your email address, pal. I got something simple for you. :D

[Seshat]

*applauds Jester* :)

[Exaspera]

*applauds all of you!*

Who sez that hanging around the interweb is useless? A whole resume-writing session right here! :)

[Jester]

I actually was too lazy to try to explain what I was doing, so I just rewrote his resume for him.

Yes, that is me being too lazy. I do the same thing at work. I call it efficient laziness. I find the best way to do something once so I don't have to do it more than once, and/or the shortest easiest way to do it. In this case, I figured the easiest thing to do was just rewrite the damn thing for him.

And since I almost like the guy, I figured why not? :lol:

[Plaidman]

And since I almost like the guy, I figured why not? :lol:

.... Ouch? What I do to to there?

In anycase, thank you everyone! I just have to change the drug dealer status he gave me, and it'll work :)

[Mikkel]

I just have to change the drug dealer status he gave me, and it'll work :)
:eek::eek::eek: Hey, you can't say something like that without showing us the resume!

I admit that I'd like to see it for selfish reasons too, I will be finished with chemo in a bit more than two months, so in the beginning of September I must start looking for work. I have owned my own shop for 16 years and before that I worked for the same three places at various times. I haven't looked for work since 1978, you may say I'm a bit out of practise :p.
I really would like to see how to write a good resume.

[Jester]

.... Ouch? What I do to to there?

Just having fun with you, man!

I just have to change the drug dealer status he gave me, and it'll work.

To be fair, you have to change more than that, Plaid. Like the addresses and phone numbers, etc. And you have to write a concise objective. While the one I put in is bullshit in content, in form it is pretty much dead on. All you really have to do is replace "kingpin" and "drug cartel" with what you are really after and you pretty much have it.

I really made it as simple as possible for you. I don't do that for everyone, ya know.

Hey, you can't say something like that without showing us the resume!

Sure he can!

But in any case, here it is, without all the font and layout, as I am merely cutting and pasting from Word. To be fair, it looks much better in Word than it does here. I really should consider starting a resume-writing business. Oh, wait....Lil Sis already does that. (Yes, seriously.)



Plaid Man

123 Street, Ave., Portland, OR12345 404-555-1234


Job Objective

To secure a kingpin position with a leading Portland drug cartel.
Professional Experience

Plaid Pantries, Inc, Portland, OR
Assistant Manager, 2004-2010
Provided exemplary customer service, improved inventory procedures, took care of managerial paperwork, performed various housekeeping duties, and due to my exceptional work ethic have been much in demand from various store managers at this Portland-area landmark convenience store chain.


Qualex, Portland, OR
Envelope Stuffer, 1999-2001
Ensured thousands of Kodak photographs were properly prepared for delivery to customers.



Education

EverestCommunity College, Portland, OR
Pharmaceutical studies, enrolled 2010, expected graduation 2012.

PortlandCommunity College, Portland, OR
Meth lab techniques, 2001-2002.


Qualifications

Superior customer service skills gained from years in the customer service field, including an ability to solve even the most difficult customer issues; ability to work with others or get work done in a solitary fashion; and willingness to work any shifts or hours required




References available upon request

[Mikkel]

Sure he can!



Okay, he can - but not without protest.

Thank you, I'll probably reuse the format. Why shouldn't you get into the same business as your sister? I assume she doesn't live in Key West.

[Jester]

Thank you, I'll probably reuse the format. Why shouldn't you get into the same business as your sister? I assume she doesn't live in Key West.

You're welcome. Keep in mind, as I said earlier, in Word I use some better/bigger fonts for certain things. Basically, I make it look good without overdoing it.

As for Lil Sis, she lives in England, and that is a side job for her, as it would be for me if I ever did it, but she is far more talented at it than I am, as she went to college for graphic design. Sure, I can write (duh), but this sort of thing is more her deal.

Don't get me wrong, if people want to actually pay me to design their resumes, I'll do it, but it is not exactly a high passion of mine. Just something I am good at, like math or picking out the right clothes. Don't care a whit about either one, just happen to be good at both.