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LadyofArc
06-01-2019, 06:23 AM
So I have a few short stories from my work behind the scenes of a private hospital in the land Down Under. I absolutely love my job and my manager has one hell of a spine.

My role consists of a mixture of coordinating the "Shit hits the fan," meetings (basically where something went wrong during surgery or after and looking into why - there's more to it, but that's the gist of it), assisting with policy development and also making pretty charts and graphs to sell various concepts to people, among other things. For the meetings, I have assistance from the fellows or registrars with the clinical side of things and I take care of the non-clinical stuff.

Actual safety report filed at work
What happened: I was cleaning my keyboard, lifted it up and found a spider underneath it.
Corrective action: I squished it and threw it in the bin.

(This was a justified report, as it was coming out of the ICU, but was just very random. Most of our safety reports are fairly mundane)

Interesting case #1:
Overheard this one at one of the "shit hits the fan meetings."
Patient comes in for surgery. Surgery in and of itself had no major complications, patient gets discharged. Patient returns about a week later complaining of pain, was jaundiced and anaemic. Patient gets returned to the operating room, they find nothing immediately wrong, so haematology get consulted.

Turns out the patient (who was in his 80's I might add) had a rare condition known as favism (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Glucose-6-phosphate_dehydrogenase_deficiency), which had never been picked up until now. What triggered it? Well, post-discharge, the patient out of absolutely nowhere, decided to binge on fava beans. :lol: Yeah, the patients sudden craving for fava beans actually saved their life, since that is often asymptomatic!

Interesting case #2:
Also overheard at a "shit hits the fan meeting."
Patient had an orthopaedic surgery of some sort (can't remember what). They decided that riding an inflatable horse at the Melbourne Cup sounded like a fantastic idea. While riding said horse, they fell and somehow managed to fracture the cement that was holding their implant in place. :wtf:

Congratulations, you made yourself look like an asshole
One of the specialties for the meetings I assist with have this tendency to well, engage in dick-measuring contests (for lack of a better term). End result is that they do not like the presence of myself, my manager (who's male) or anyone from higher up that happens to be female. Luckily their meetings go fairly quick.

Recently, one of the OTHER committees I sit in on (solely for minute taking) demanded that the results of hand hygiene audits are tabled at said meetings (the audits are basically how often staff are correctly washing their hands when they enter a room, touch a patient, start a procedure etc.). So I naturally throw something together and present it at said meeting. The chairperson of the committee then starts grilling me on the hand hygiene moments myself, asking what they were, how the audits are done etc. Luckily the head of Intensive Care was there to bail me out (as were the nurses from that ward) and he snidely asked for more information to be presented in future for clarification. Me, being Ms. Polite, opt to take that information away.

It wasn't until two days AFTER that meeting however (and when I was presenting the results at another meeting) when I realised that him asking me those questions made him look like the bigger idiot. Why? Because the stuff about what hand hygiene actually is (at least, I did concede he may not know the audit process), is stuff that he really should have known. If he's questioning me, then it shows his level of incompetence, and if he's not caring, then that's extremely scary. Oh, and did I mention that he's actually a neurosurgeon?! :eek: :eek:

Seanette
06-01-2019, 03:07 PM
Actual safety report filed at work
What happened: I was cleaning my keyboard, lifted it up and found a spider underneath it.
Corrective action: I squished it and threw it in the bin.

(This was a justified report, as it was coming out of the ICU, but was just very random. Most of our safety reports are fairly mundane)

Squishing the keyboard and binning it seems a touch extreme. :)

(Yes, I know he/she meant the spider, but the way that's phrased......)

dalesys
06-01-2019, 03:10 PM
... (Yes, I know he/she meant the spider, but the way that's phrased......)
Miss-interpolation is my favorite sport. :p

Monterey Jack
06-02-2019, 02:17 AM
Turns out the patient (who was in his 80's I might add) had a rare condition known as favism (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Glucose-6-phosphate_dehydrogenase_deficiency), which had never been picked up until now. What triggered it? Well, post-discharge, the patient out of absolutely nowhere, decided to binge on fava beans. :lol: Yeah, the patients sudden craving for fava beans actually saved their life, since that is often asymptomatic!


Did the patient enjoy them with a nice chianti...?

http://media.giphy.com/media/s0bDSaIKg152U/giphy.gif

LadyofArc
06-02-2019, 06:20 AM
Did the patient enjoy them with a nice chianti...?



That was actually my first thought, but if I'd said THAT, it would've disrupted the whole meeting.

Ironclad Alibi
06-03-2019, 01:00 AM
Squishing the keyboard and binning it seems a touch extreme. :)

Not if it has the potential of being infested with lots of little spiders.

LadyofArc
06-03-2019, 09:53 AM
Not if it has the potential of being infested with lots of little spiders.

I found out today that the area is likely going to be fumigated (not sure how's that gonna work, but we don't have an ED)

EricKei
06-05-2019, 05:40 PM
Did the patient enjoy them with a nice chianti...?

Well, that might mean he was off of his meds, (http://mentalfloss.com/uk/movies/27139/the-hidden-meaning-of-the-silence-of-the-lambs-iconic-line) if so...:eek:

Kit-Ginevra
06-05-2019, 11:34 PM
Actual safety report filed at work
What happened: A girl was cleaning her keyboard, lifted it up and found a spider underneath it.
Corrective action:Loud yelling as she leapt up onto the table and started squealing 'ohmigod ohmigod get it away from me'


Justfixedthatalittleferya :p

Minflick
06-11-2019, 06:09 PM
But - the keyboard is ON the table. Why the HELL jump up on the table and JOIN the damned spider? Noo, no, no, no! Leave, scream, etc. Do not get CLOSER to it.....

Nunavut Pants
06-11-2019, 09:07 PM
I think Kit-G was hoping to change their name to "table" so you would hop on them.... :D

LadyofArc
06-12-2019, 12:38 AM
Couple more stories from the last few weeks:

Dude, just shut up

I REALLY can't fault this guy too hard, but ye gods was taking the minutes for this meeting painful.

One of the committees we have at work consists of former patients, a couple of our med students and part of my team. Basically said committee's role is to ensure that we're actually meeting the needs of the patients and getting their perspective on things (it's also something we do get accredited against). Unfortunately, one of the guys in the group has the problem that when he gets started, he does not stop talking. And to make matters worse, he will bring EVERYTHING around onto his area of passion, which while it's great, makes it hard for everyone else to get a word edgewise in. He's also a slow talker. Yeah...doing the minutes for this meeting is definitely interesting!

I don't have an accent do I?

One from a "shit hits the fan" meeting last night. This one's the smallest committee I've dealt with by far (small specialty - only 5 doctors) and I'd been warned in advance that the members had that "boys club" mentality about them. While I DID notice it during the meeting (slightly), it wasn't as bad as I feared.

Towards the end of the meeting however, I was talking about the hand hygiene statistics and we actually got into a good discussion about how to improve on proper hand hygiene, then one of the doctors asks me "Are you American?" I tell him no and he then asks me where I'm from. I tell him I'm from MinorCapitalCity in Australia and he goes on to tell me that I have an accent! Cue EVERYONE in the room (including the two people who actually have accents - one Vietnamese, the other Indian) bursting into laughter :roll:.

(For the record, yes there are slight differences in accent across the Australian states, but it's not overly noticeable)

dalesys
06-12-2019, 01:39 AM
...(For the record, yes there are slight differences in accent across the Australian states, but it's not overly noticeable)
Tell that to Professor Higgins! ( " ... and in your teen years your lived on M*** Street ... " )

TheSHAD0W
06-12-2019, 01:53 AM
Or Doctor Thornton Poole. ("She seems to have such nicely rounded diphthongs!" Response: "That's what got her into this jam!")

Kit-Ginevra
06-12-2019, 11:09 PM
The best way to show yor accent is to repeat
Australia 6 New Zealand 7 :)

LadyofArc
06-14-2019, 07:41 AM
So it turns out that Doctor "Where are you from" I mentioned above was actually drunk by the time he'd asked me that question - for some strange reason, that's the ONLY "Shit hit the fan" meeting where wine is part of the catering request and the good doctor figured "Hey, red wine has health benefits, I may as well partake!" Yeah...taking the wine off future requests. (Most of the requests had been put in before I started there)

Actual Safety Incident at work #2
To sum up, one of the operating theatre nurses was doing some cleaning in one of the rooms and somehow (not quite sure how), managed to flick himself in the balls with a plug from an electrical cord. To make matters worse, he'd had a vasectomy recently, so there was also a bit of swelling. Yeah....

Funny doctor names

Was doing some data analysis stuff the other day and found that there used to be an orthopaedic doctor at the hospital with the surname of "Hackman." There was also another doctor (not sure what specialty) with the surname "Butt."

EricKei
06-15-2019, 01:56 AM
Funny doctor names

Can't help ya there, but I can give you a couple funny lawyer names. Suffice it to say that the names fit them quite well: Mr. Fink and Mr. Cheatwood.

Other interesting names I've come across lately...


A candidate for re-election to the sheriff's office: Mr. Crook


A real estate agent: Dick Leike (yes, his last name is pronounced as "like"). His parents have to have known that naming him Richard (which I presume is his actual name) was gonna get interesting comments thrown at him back in school...