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BlakeMP
08-20-2006, 12:00 AM
So as I mentioned, I've got a brand-spanking new job as an English teacher, and so far I'm enjoying it. But I've gotta say, I've NEVER done so much paperwork IN MY LIFE. I suppose I can understand most of it -- being a teacher, being trusted with people's children, of course they're going to be very thorough.

But then I got to the document they give you with just about every job application, the one where they ask if you've ever had a heart condition, asthma, allergies, etc. I don't think I've ever applied for a job that didn't have that document. But the schoolboard had a much, MUCH longer list than any job I've ever had before, going through every sort of chronic disease, illness and predilection. And that's why the school board now has a signed document from me stating that I'm afraid of heights.

Good grief.

So I was thinking, what are some of the strangest questions you've ever had to answer in a job interview?

LostMyMind
08-20-2006, 12:13 AM
:lol: no skeletons in the closets anymore.

Strangest question. Does "Are you punctual" count?

COMINATCHA
08-20-2006, 02:16 AM
I once had this question asked of me - "Could you sell ice to an eskimo?"

I just looked at the guy with a WTF expression on my face. Moron.

Mikkel
08-20-2006, 07:17 AM
I once had this question asked of me - "Could you sell ice to an eskimo?"

I just looked at the guy with a WTF expression on my face. Moron.

If it was hot enough where we was I guess I could, I have, actually:D (well, icecream).

Retail Associate
08-20-2006, 09:13 AM
I have worked retail for over 6 years. When I applied for my current job one of the questions asked of me during the interview was the following:

Interviewer: "What is the most enjoyable aspect of customer service?"

Me: :shrug: "Is that a trick question?"

I mean, come on, how the hell do you answer that question???

LostMyMind
08-20-2006, 03:33 PM
I mean, come on, how the hell do you answer that question???
Well, I would guess "nooners" would be the wrong answer. :devil:

Irving Patrick Freleigh
08-20-2006, 08:01 PM
Well, I would guess "nooners" would be the wrong answer. :devil:

So is "telling off the stupid ones", I guess. :D

Gurndigarn
08-20-2006, 08:58 PM
I have worked retail for over 6 years. When I applied for my current job one of the questions asked of me during the interview was the following:

Interviewer: "What is the most enjoyable aspect of customer service?"

Me: :shrug: "Is that a trick question?"

I mean, come on, how the hell do you answer that question???

Try: "Helping the people who aren't idiots or assholes."

If you don't care if you get the job, add this in: "But just out of curiousity, I'm sure you get some interesting lies when you ask that. What are the best ones you've gotten, and how do you keep a straight face?"

RecoveringKinkoid
08-21-2006, 03:00 AM
Best interview I ever had. Mom and Pop photo lab. I went in, sat down, and me and the potential boss stared at each other. He was a large, older gent. He squinted at me, sized me up, and said, and I quote,

"So. A lotta cussin' bother you?"

:lol:

Thus began my stint as a lab troll at what we called Midlands Cussin' (Custom) Photo.

Ringtail Z28
08-21-2006, 03:19 AM
"What's your favorite video game?"

"Why is it your favorite game?" :confused:

"Why would I buy that game?" :wtf:

I got these questions during an interview at Taco Bell back in high school. The manager came off as such a weirdo I decided to intentionally blow the interview by telling her that I was a total Goth. I told her that I would probably still be wearing make-up and a collar and stuff if I was scheduled on a school day and didn't have at least eight hours to change. :D

Kiwi
08-21-2006, 05:23 AM
"are you a witch?"

I got asked that when I interviewed for the new age shop, the owner was a pagen and asked me that so out of the blue my jaw just gaped for a few seconds.....

she said that I didnt HAVE to answer legally, but she could feel a close connection with mother earth around me.... I kind of just stared at her, thanked her and informed her that I was infact Christian but I was happy she felt the energy anyway

it was a REALLY wierd moment

stormtreader
08-21-2006, 09:38 AM
"Have you managed to do any of the mission maps" in answer to me saying I liked to play computer games in my spare time, and was currently playing Warcraft 3.
The last half an hour of the interview continued this theme, and yes I got the job :D

Twotall
08-21-2006, 10:01 AM
When applying for a two-month summer job, I was suddenly asked "Do you play poker?", and when I confirmed this, the follow-up questions for the next 15 minutes were all about poker and whether I played online or IRL. Turned out there was an in-office game going every Tuesday, and the boss just wanted to know if I was interested in joining in, seeing how he had already decided to give me the job. :D

Crazyredhead
08-21-2006, 01:47 PM
"are you a witch?"


I don't know how I would answer this.

So I would probably tell him/her that I am not but would love to be.

I have a very odd man with backward ideas. But since I am not confrontational and don't like arguing, I just let it go.

I know, he is an ass.

Salesmonkey
08-21-2006, 07:09 PM
"Can you name all four Beatles?"

Sad but true, though, I failed. I know John, Paul, and Ringo but I can never remember the fourth. You know, the one that played the saxophone and ended up suing them.

Mikkel
08-21-2006, 07:25 PM
"Can you name all four Beatles?"

Sad but true, though, I failed. I know John, Paul, and Ringo but I can never remember the fourth. You know, the one that played the saxophone and ended up suing them.

George :angel:

RecoveringKinkoid
08-21-2006, 07:35 PM
Careful that you do not confuse the misguided wrongs men do in the name of a religion for the religion itself.

Ryu
08-21-2006, 07:47 PM
*edited by Luna

This post edited by Luna as it referenced already edited material.

Rapscallion
08-21-2006, 08:40 PM
Just as a general reminder, we shut down threads that go even into civil debate over matter of faith and politics - they end up incivil within seconds, give or take.

Let's get back on topic.

Raspcalion - about to do some editing...

Ree
08-21-2006, 11:04 PM
slightly :ot:I once had this question asked of me - "Could you sell ice to an eskimo?"

I just looked at the guy with a WTF expression on my face. Moron.I'm beginning to see why you may be having a problem finding a job. You missed your chance to shine by giving a knock-his-socks-off response to that question.

What he was asking was, "Do you have an irresistible selling style?"
Obviously, Eskimos are surrounded by ice, and have no need of more, so if you were able to sell them some, then you have superb and unexcelled salesmanship that makes a person think they really need what you are trying to sell.

If you had understood the question, you could have "sold yourself" to the interviewer and got the job. ;)

Brighid45
08-21-2006, 11:08 PM
It wasn't exactly an interview question, but I did one of those idiotic tests where they ask you "Would you steal items from the storage closet?" and "Would you goof off on company time?" I had to really resist the urge to say "HELL YES!" to both. :D

Actual interview question from long ago: "What kind of animal would you like to be?" My answer: "Hedgehog." And I got the job for that answer too. :)

Gurndigarn
08-21-2006, 11:15 PM
slightly :ot:I'm beginning to see why you may be having a problem finding a job. You missed your chance to shine by giving a knock-his-socks-off response to that question.

It should be fairly easy to sell them ice, or at least refrigerator/freezer combinations. Otherwise, they have to head off to the glaciers to carve their ice out. And those glaciers seem to be getting further away each year.

Broomjockey
08-22-2006, 01:44 AM
It would take forever to make an igloo out of ice cubes from trays! and the walls would be so thin! You'd have to do at least two layers, with snow between for insulation!

bean
08-22-2006, 01:47 AM
The oddest question I've had was today. In the middle of a lot of technical questions, they ask "Do you play World of Warcraft?" :confused:

I told him no, he said "oh thank god" and asked what games I did play (Quake, Unreal Tournament, and CounterStrike). He plays pretty much the same ones.

Fera Festiva
08-22-2006, 09:03 AM
A couple of odd ones from applications:

My boyfriend applied for a job at a new-age-witchcraft-crystal-healing type shop - the application form required him to fill out his astrological chart and point out the bits that meant he was suitable for the job ("the moon is in the seventh house, therefore I love working with people", that sort of thing).

(I guess the point of that question was to assess whether the applicant knew about astrology, since they'd be selling stuff relating to it and giving customers advice on it, but it still made me smile - what if your chart showed you were an outcast who hated the public, if they didn't employ you because you were Gemini would that be discrimination, etc. ;) )

A place I once applied for had a question consisting of a line like this:

Van Halen ---------------------------------------------------------- S Club 7

You had to put an X on the line to represent your musical taste.

Banrion
08-22-2006, 12:40 PM
The stranges question I ever got was "Who is your favorite superhero and why?" Not being one for generic Superman or Spiderman, or any of the x-men as they had ALL been made into movies in the last 3 years, I went with GEM. Well of course interviewer geek manager guy hadn't ever heard of her, so I had to explain it, no biggie.

To this day I do not understand how superheroes in any way shape or form apply to accounting.

JustADude
08-22-2006, 12:41 PM
Actual interview question from long ago: "What kind of animal would you like to be?" My answer: "Hedgehog." And I got the job for that answer too. :)

Because a hedgehog can't be buggered at all? :lol: Bonus points if anyone gets that reference.

My strangest question was "What movie featured the tag line 'In space noone can hear you scream'?" Of course, that was after saying my favorite movies were old sci-fi and horror flicks. If you can't guess from other posts, I got the job. :D

stormtreader
08-22-2006, 01:00 PM
Because a hedgehog can't be buggered at all? Bonus points if anyone gets that reference.

"The Hedgehog Song" from the discworld books - too easy :D

AforElephant
08-22-2006, 02:57 PM
"The Hedgehog Song" from the discworld books - too easy :D

goes on:

You can bugger a whale if you fancy a swim,
or an orangutan if you hang from a limb,
You can take time with a snail if you slow to a crawl,
but the hedgehog can never be buggered at all.

With regards to the question about the most enjoyable aspect of customer service...i think the answer would be "customer satisfaction"....personal opinion and open to debate really.

BrassCowboy
08-22-2006, 03:30 PM
The interviewer took his watch off and told me:

"Here you go. (hands me watch) Now sell me my watch back."

I didn't get the job.

NightAngel
08-22-2006, 04:55 PM
BrassCowboy-
Honestly, I'm pretty good at sales but I probably wouldn't have gotten the job either. I'm no good at role playing scenerios. Just put me on the floor with the product and I'll sell it for pete's sake!

I get a whole different mindset when I'm actually with a customer than pretending I'm with one. ;)

Mr. Rager!
08-22-2006, 05:02 PM
For my current job, I had to sell a horrible black and white bic pen. It was kind of hard, but I'm good at sales so I was able to do nicely. :D

Misanthropical
08-22-2006, 05:03 PM
When I was interviewing for Security at the mall, some of the questions where:

~Have you ever committed a crime and didn't get caught?

~Have you ever lied?

~Have you ever murdered anyone?

~Have you ever done illegal drugs?

~Where you spanked as a child?

These questions were all done by an automated telephone system. Where you pushed 1 for yes and 2 for no and 3 for refuse to answer.

I was in there doing the biggest :rolleyes: in the world.

MadMike
08-22-2006, 05:11 PM
~Have you ever committed a crime and didn't get caught?


Well, they might weed out a few stupid criminals with that one, although I can't imagine the stupid ones getting away with a crime.

~Have you ever lied?


Doesn't everyone?

~Have you ever murdered anyone?

~Have you ever done illegal drugs?


See reply to first question.

~Where you spanked as a child?


That one is just plain creepy, although I guess it would be worse if they asked if you had been spanked as an adult. ;)

BrassCowboy
08-22-2006, 05:52 PM
BrassCowboy-
Honestly, I'm pretty good at sales but I probably wouldn't have gotten the job either.


The funny thing is: it was a pizza place, not a commision-type store.

BunnyJas
08-24-2006, 01:16 AM
I had a question on a job application once that said, "Would you ever steal from this store?" :confused: I wanted to answer, "Yes, but you'll never catch me! Hahaha!!" Seriously, did they actually think that by asking this they'd be able to weed out thieving employees?

Another time I was doing a computer application for a well-known department store. It had about 50 questions on it. The first ones were pretty normal but as you got closer to question 50 they started asking off the wall questions like "What's 2+2?" and "What color is the sky?" I guess they were just trying to make sure you were paying attention.....

Luna
08-25-2006, 03:09 AM
I had to take a short phone "morals" survey for music store hell. For my new job - I had to take a written fill in the dot with a pencil 45 minutes paper test.
Lines in purple are what I was thinking as I was answering....


Some of the questions were:
*Have you ever physically assaulted your boss? (Is bear making that stressful??)
*When was the last time you've gotten into a physical altercation with a co-worker? (I wonder if thinking about it counts...)
*Do you have mood swings? (Duh! I'm a woman, and that's rude to ask!)
*When is the last time you have taken drugs? (Didn't specify legal or illegal...so I'm on Nexium for heartburn - how do I answer? I'll go with it meaning illegal...)
*Would you prefer to sit at home and read or go out with friends? (But I love books! Depends on where they're going and who is going. Gah.)
*Have you ever told a lie? (How can anyone say no to this?)
*Are you lying now? (Damn this test is long)
*If you received a dollar in a national sweepstakes that you didn't earn - would you go through the trouble of sending it back? (Wait, there's no are you freaking kidding me dot to fill in...)
*Do you think people are basically good? (What does this have to do with stuffed animals?)

I must've did something right b/c I got the job. ;)

MadMike
08-25-2006, 01:22 PM
*Are you lying now?

But if you answer "Yes" to this question, you're answering it truthfully. But if you're answering truthfully, then you're not lying. But if you're not lying, then you didn't answer the question truthfully. If you didn't answer the question truthfully, then you're lying. If you're lying...

Aw, crap! I think my brain just went into a loop! :confused:

LostMyMind
08-25-2006, 03:21 PM
If you answer "Yes" then there is only one conclusion (liar).
If you answer "No" then there is two conclusion. You could still be lying or be telling the truth, which makes it a bad question to find the truth ;)

repsac
08-27-2006, 08:24 PM
Let's see here. Gods, there's several.

1.) Why did your father move around so much?
2.) Can you hold down a job for more than X ammount of time?
3.) Did your father become disabled through his own doing?

there were more from this guy, to which I finally stood up looked him dead in the eye and said quote. "F*** you. Look, I don't need this f***ing job if all you're going to do is ask about my dad. He's not here applying for this you stupid b****** so, why don't you just f****** call him and ask these d*** questions? I'm going to report your f****** a** to the department of labor, and I hope they fine you!" I stormed out, slammed his office door and then did report him. And yes, they did fine him. Severely.

Stupid but funny questions:

Have you ever killed anyone?
If so, have they found the body?
Were you convicted for this?
How much time did you serve?
When were you released?
Did you escape?
Have you ever taken illicit drugs?
What were their effects?
Do you take them regularly?
Do you sell them?
If so, where do you sell them?
Can you read a map?
Do you get lost easily?
Do you speak english?
If not, can you read english? (These two were in english only.)
Can you read?
Can you write?
Are you blind? (I kid you not. This was on there.)

The prior questions were on an application to be a Georgia State Trooper.

Tria
08-27-2006, 10:10 PM
Well, since it's up....

~Have you ever committed a crime and didn't get caught?
Jaywalking count?
~Have you ever lied?
1.
~Have you ever murdered anyone?
2.
~Have you ever done illegal drugs?
2.
~Where you spanked as a child?
1.

Sorry, bored.

Jpurple
08-28-2006, 03:04 PM
Amusingly enough, I was asked not only my own religion, but my mother and father's religion(s) on my last job application. Apparently that's legal here, although why on earth they want to know I couldn't say. (And I doubt anyone understood my response, as I put 'NOYB' =None of Your Business)

repsac
08-28-2006, 11:59 PM
Amusingly enough, I was asked not only my own religion, but my mother and father's religion(s) on my last job application. Apparently that's legal here, although why on earth they want to know I couldn't say. (And I doubt anyone understood my response, as I put 'NOYB' =None of Your Business)

From what I'm told, that's perfectly legal in certain situations. Like, if you are applying to work at a Christian Book store, they're allowed to ask that.

Ringtail Z28
08-29-2006, 12:20 AM
Well, since it's up....
~Have you ever murdered anyone?

Sorry, bored.

I would say, "No but I'm a quick learner." ;)

wagegoth
09-02-2006, 10:24 PM
In an interview, I was actually asked, "If you were a tree, what kind of tree would you be?"

On an application, "Do you ride a motorcycle?"

wagegoth
09-02-2006, 10:25 PM
Amusingly enough, I was asked not only my own religion, but my mother and father's religion(s) on my last job application. Apparently that's legal here, although why on earth they want to know I couldn't say. (And I doubt anyone understood my response, as I put 'NOYB' =None of Your Business)

Where are you located?

BlakeMP
09-03-2006, 02:41 AM
In an interview, I was actually asked, "If you were a tree, what kind of tree would you be?"

On an application, "Do you ride a motorcycle?"

Now I can actually think of a few jobs where the ability to ride a motorcycle could be pertinent information.

There are none where the tree thing matters. :roll:

wagegoth
09-03-2006, 07:05 AM
Now I can actually think of a few jobs where the ability to ride a motorcycle could be pertinent information.

There are none where the tree thing matters. :roll:

It was a convenience store. I think that somehow having a motorcycle was considered a poor reflection on my character.

I think the whole chain went under a few years ago.:wave:

Tanasi
09-04-2006, 04:04 AM
Right after I was discharged from active duty in the 70's I applied as a mechanic at a motorcycle shop that was run by a couple of hippies. It was during the rice-burner revolution and these shops were selling moto's as fast as they could be imported. I was asked if I had ever murdered anyone. I said no.
I was hired and a few months later we were all at a beer-joint knocking a few back and I ran into an old Army buddie. We were talking about some shoot-outs we were in and close-calls. The next day the boss hippie called me into his office and told me I was being laid off because I lied on my application. What lie? You said you've never killed someone. No I said I never murdered someone, there's a big difference. There wasn't a difference to him.

Other weird questions, what's your favorite automobile engine? Ford 289/302
How close is correct when you're processing payroll? It's either right or wrong there's no shades of gray.
Do you hunt deer and where do you hunt. Yes and I don't give directions to my honey holes.

For my current job the boss gave everyone this stupid personality test. If according to it you were considered too artsy he wouldn't hire you. He doesn't use it anymore since his test was disproved.

wagegoth
09-04-2006, 06:29 AM
For my current job the boss gave everyone this stupid personality test. If according to it you were considered too artsy he wouldn't hire you. He doesn't use it anymore since his test was disproved.

Dayton Hudson got seriously sued over a personality test they were giving out at Mervyn's and lost. But these idiots just keep trying.

Becks
09-04-2006, 02:20 PM
The next day the boss hippie called me into his office and told me I was being laid off because I lied on my application. What lie? You said you've never killed someone. No I said I never murdered someone, there's a big difference. There wasn't a difference to him.

You're right, there IS a big difference between being in the military and killing, and going out and murdering someone.

I wonder how he would see a self-defense killing?

Tanasi
09-04-2006, 09:04 PM
You're right, there IS a big difference between being in the military and killing, and going out and murdering someone.

I wonder how he would see a self-defense killing?

The only thing he's seeing now is the backside of his eyelids. He Od'd several years ago. To answer your question he didn't believe in killing for any reason.

aqutalion
09-05-2006, 02:30 AM
On some crime shows, they were talking about applications for jobs with armored car companies, and one of the questions they all had was "Have you ever thought about robbing an armored car?" Anyone who answered no wouldn't get the job.

Not technically a job interview, but when I applied for my security clearance for the cubicle farm, one of the questions on their intro questionaire was "I am good at keeping secrets (yes/no)". Sheesh, I wondered if anyone actually answered no.

Mighty Girl
09-05-2006, 02:34 AM
Why did you leave your previous jobs?

-The real answer, because they sucked and I can only take so much suckage from one source.

-The answer I always gave- because I wasn't challenged enough and I was looking for a better opportunity.

I often wondered what they would say if I said- "Because I get sick of kissing the same ass day in and day out for minimum wage, dumb ass, I'd like a little variety".:D

Gurndigarn
09-05-2006, 12:21 PM
Why did you leave your previous jobs?

-The real answer, because they sucked and I can only take so much suckage from one source.

-The answer I always gave- because I wasn't challenged enough and I was looking for a better opportunity.

I often wondered what they would say if I said- "Because I get sick of kissing the same ass day in and day out for minimum wage, dumb ass, I'd like a little variety".:D

If you take out the "dumb ass" part, it would be a wonderful way to screen potential employers. The ones who chuckle and give you a small mental point for it are more likely to be worth working for. The ones who give you a cat-butt face are probably not people you want to work for.

Lace Neil Singer
09-05-2006, 02:22 PM
I went to loads of interviews straight after college... it was hell. Most were straightforward, with some "Huh?" moments. And here they are...

1. "Do you have a boyf?"

2. "Are you wearing a bra?" (by the way, when I got that question, I left the interview. Sexist pig. :mad: )

3. "What would you do if someone stuck a gun in your face?"

4. "Are you basically honest?"

The first two were for the same interview. The interviewer was a middle aged man, and the job was a generic shop job. He made my skin crawl... ewwww. I didn't report him, so I can only hope he got stiffed by the Sexual Discrimination Act eventually.

As for the second two, both were from different interviews and I answered "Give him the money from the till" and "Yes". I don't see the point of the 4th question; if you weren't honest, you could be lying by saying yes and you'd hardly admit to being dishonest would you?

Mighty Girl
09-05-2006, 06:56 PM
[QUOTE=Lace Neil Singer;25998]
3. "What would you do if someone stuck a gun in your face?"

[QUOTE]

Actually, I think that's a really good question. Only because, I've read about two situations that occurred in my area, where the night clerk at some store actually withheld the money and tried to apprehend the thief themselves... But, then, I've long held that we have an overflow of stupid here.

MystyGlyttyr
09-05-2006, 07:24 PM
This was one of those off the old Wal-Mart computer app...

True or False: "I used to do drugs, but I don't now."

...what the hell is that and what am I supposed to do with it?

I flipped a coin and went with false. Obviously not the right answer...no job.

MadMike
09-05-2006, 08:32 PM
True or False: "I used to do drugs, but I don't now."


"If you have comitted a crime and wish to confess, click 'yes'; otherwise, press 'no.'"

"You have chosen 'no', meaning you have comitted a crime and do not wish to confess. A wagon is on its way."

Seriously, it sounds like there's no right answer to that question.

Ryu
09-05-2006, 09:05 PM
thats a no win question if ive ever seen one

Lace Neil Singer
09-05-2006, 09:58 PM
Actually, I think that's a really good question. Only because, I've read about two situations that occurred in my area, where the night clerk at some store actually withheld the money and tried to apprehend the thief themselves... But, then, I've long held that we have an overflow of stupid here.

I just wasn't expecting it. I did get the job, at a newsagents, so obviously I gave the right answer. It made me feel a bit scared tho, expecting mad gunmen to come rushing in every day. :lol:

Imogene
09-07-2006, 06:21 PM
The stranges question I ever got was "Who is your favorite superhero and why?" Not being one for generic Superman or Spiderman, or any of the x-men as they had ALL been made into movies in the last 3 years, I went with GEM. Well of course interviewer geek manager guy hadn't ever heard of her, so I had to explain it, no biggie.

To this day I do not understand how superheroes in any way shape or form apply to accounting.

She's truly, truly outrageous, and only a hologram, that Jem. Now, I could understand using Synergy, her holographic partner, but Jem was a regular old musician with some funky earrings.

Mark Healey
09-10-2006, 05:00 AM
Apparently that's legal here,

Here? Your public profile doesn't specify.