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SengaKitty
12-13-2008, 12:09 PM
Dear car,

you suck. 'nuff said.

unhappily
Me.

Misanthropical
12-13-2008, 02:15 PM
Dear Misanthropical

Do I get first dibs?

PS, thanks for the straight line.

Rapscallion

Dear Raps,

Sorry, no. :p


Dear BossMan,

People who enjoy reading books are not freaks of nature. The fact that Whiner agreed with you should have proved my point.


Dear religious lady who sits next to me,

Every day when I come in I say hello to you. So, I thought I would see if you would say it first yesterday. You didn't say a word to me all shift.

Is that how God would want you to act? I know I freak you out with the plastic skulls on my desk, but really, did Jesus only talk to those who believed the same way he did? Think about it.


Dear Children,

I do not call all the time when I'm at work. I call to make sure you all made it home safely from school, that is not calling all the time and bugging you guys.

You all should realize by now I worry, so deal with it! I also miss you guys a lot when I'm at work.


Dear family,

How about you all clean up the house a bit when I'm at work? I can work full time and come home and clean the house! Help me out a bit here!

I did appreciate that you guys saved me some pizza last night. I was starving by the time I got home from work.

iradney
12-13-2008, 02:50 PM
Dear TBS

You know I love you. And I know you've put all your stuff in storage before you go to visit your Mom. But please, ASK IF IT'S OK BEFORE YOU COME AND STAY WITH US FOR A FUCKING WEEK. I'm getting heartily tired of our house being treated like a halfway house, and you'll probably stay here for a couple weeks in January as well while you look for a place.

Frustrated and WISHING people would consult her on this shit before hand
Rads

ETA: Dear TTO

Obviously I need to stop paying rent. This is the second time that people have been invited to "live" with us for a while without me even being consulted or told or asked. I LIVE HERE TOO. I PAY RENT TOO. Therefore, I would at least like to be ASKED if it's ok

Fuming
Rads

SengaKitty
12-13-2008, 03:06 PM
"dear" car,

After all I've been through this month, why did you choose NOW to become a death trap... I mean really was that necessary... I don't have four hundred dollars to fix you, let alone the money to replace you.... -sigh- I guess it's a blessing in disguise as I really hate my job.. but still I was going to try to find something better BEFORE quitting.... sheesh

No love
me

crazylegs
12-13-2008, 06:16 PM
Dear Rads,

If I had spare space I'd offer it so you could have a week to yourself! :)

Crazylegs

iradney
12-13-2008, 06:57 PM
Dear P

I always knew there was a reason I loved you :)
How you doing, btw?

Love
Rads

crazylegs
12-13-2008, 07:02 PM
B

Well, it's not for my dashing good looks! :p

I'm bleh, to be honest.

P

iradney
12-13-2008, 07:08 PM
Dear P

Pish posh, you're lovely to look at! *ogles*
Any reason why you're bleh, or is it just the "Oh god, I wish the silly season was OVER already" feeling?

B

persephone
12-13-2008, 07:52 PM
Dear Hubby,

No, the "elf's" hiding place is not in the attic, the closet, the basement or any of the other very logical places for someone to hide gifts. You are not going to find them -- you have to wait until Christmas, just like Daughter and Son. :p

There's a reason I don't put your presents under the tree until we get to Mom and Daddy's. You are worse than the children about trying to figure out what you are getting! You really are a big kid when it comes to Christmas!

You're lucky I love you to pieces and think it's cute instead of finding it annoying! :lol:

Love,

your wife, the "Christmas Elf" in the house



Dear Daughter and Son,

I know you are both trying so very very hard to be good this Christmas season. Thank you for being calm and quiet and not demanding toys like so many other kids when we were in Wal-Mart this morning. Thank you for not destroying the Christmas decorations. Thank you for trying so hard. I know you slip up and get overwhelmed sometimes, but know what? That's okay. You're kids.

You really are great children and your Mommy and Daddy love you very very much.

Love,

Mommy



Dear Bassett Hound that just moved in next door,

I am sorry your family leaves you during the day. I am sorry you are lonely. I would come over and entertain you if I could but I don't know our new neighbors that well yet.

But could you please please please please please PLEASE stop howling all day long? It's heart wrenching to hear you sound so very sad.

If it makes you feel better, my Kitty Cat is standing at the back door and seems to want to come keep you company.

I'm sorry I can't help you!

your next door neighbor



Dear new neighbors,

Your dog is very lonely. Please play with him more.

Yours,

the next door neighbor with the kids

Lioness Blackfire
12-13-2008, 10:01 PM
Dear Mysterious Substance on the Tarp in the Hayloft,

You are uniformly dark brown, sort of lumpy, rather stinky, and apparently still wet. You don't smell anything like excrement, or vomit, or rot. The roof doesn't appear to be leaking, though it's hard to tell today since it's dry.

What are you? :confused:

Sincerely,
The Scientifically Curious but still Grossed Out Barn Owner's Daughter

---

Dear Artificial Christmas Tree,

I think you're older than I am, and yet you're very realistic looking and you're still holding together pretty well. I remember not being able to put the top branches on you way back when. When you finally do fall apart I will be sad, but I'm glad you're probably going to be okay for at least one more year! :love:

Love love,
Lioness

---

Dear Wii,

Why do you keep flashing at me? I don't think you normally do that. What did Lil' Bro forget to do when turning you off?

Confusedly Yours,
Lioness

P.S. - Where's your instruction manual?

the_std
12-13-2008, 11:27 PM
Dear Hangover,

I am keeping quiet, still and in the dark. I have drunk approximately a billion glasses of water, and have fed you ibuprofen. I have had a hot shower and am doing pretty much nothing at all. Please stop being so sad! You're making me want to kill things.

But you were so totally worth it.

Augh,
Me

Dear Ninja,

Thank you for getting me floor-lickin' drunk last night, thank you for the warm bed to crash in and thank you for... Well... :eyewaggle:

You make me laugh like a maniac. I like!

I so totally owe you.

So-very-tiredly,
Me

draftermatt
12-14-2008, 12:47 PM
Dear Late 30's and beyond concert goers from last night,

Trust me, I think it's cool that you are out at a concert surrounded by younger people. But what's the deal with getting fall down drunk? Or so drunk you dance like a crazed money?

I get wanting to drink and have a good time, but why pay money to see a concert and then not enjoy it because you're almost ready to pass out/throw up?

Me no understand. Plus don't you think it's hypocrtical considering the way some people your age act when it comes towards those of us in the other generations?

What would you tell your kids?

Dear Lady in the Corset,

You looked odd with your breasts jacked up to Jesus, but who am I to judge. By the way, grabbing my ass as I stood next to my wife, made me feel violated, so thank-you. You were old enough to be my mother.

Dear Blonde Blob,

Get your goddamn hands off my waist. I was attempting to move them myself when you moved them only to put them back and then trail your hands across my back. Making me feel even more violated.

Dear Lady at the Bar,
Thanks for the compliment, I like that shirt too. I'm not sure why you gave me a dirty look after you said it was a nice shirt though.

Dear Drunken dancing idiot,
You sang, you danced, you yelled, you punched the air near me numerous times. I was glad you never made contact. It wouldn't have ended well for one of us.

crazylegs
12-14-2008, 02:57 PM
Dear the_std

WooHoo!

That is all.

Crazylegs

Evil Queen
12-14-2008, 04:16 PM
Dear Fucknut,

You are a fucknut. I can't believe you said that! You do deserve to be strung up by your toes, you ignorant thug!

If looks could kill,
-EQ


Dear Broom,

Fucknut is my new word. Thanks dude.

-EQ

crazylegs
12-14-2008, 04:22 PM
Dear Rads and the_std

Thank you, yet again you've both helped me stop feeling so bloody sorry for myself.

I appreciate it, I really do.

Much love and hugs

Crazylegs.

SengaKitty
12-15-2008, 03:33 AM
Dear SO,

I'm glad you enjoyed the toy I made you. I'm glad you said we could go to the party last night, and I'm really glad you got over your nervousness, even though once we got there, it seems you transferred it to me. I still had a massive amount of fun, and can't wait til January for the next party... I love you :D


Dear Now-Ex-Boss,
Did I quit or get fired? Am I able to collect unemployment?

Dear world,
What the fuck? I've never had this big a problem trying to get and keep a job... So why did I just lose my third job in seven months? That was the fourth job this year... What. The. Fuck?

Shangri-laschild
12-15-2008, 02:01 PM
Dear J2,

Seeing you sit there glaring at the door reminded me of one of the reasons I adore you and I haven't beaten you for all the other stuff. You're a good kid when you want to be.

Dear neighborhood,

I don't know who threw stuff at or thumped the house last night but was that really necessary? We could have done without that, especially at midnight.

Dear Lady,

Your mother hening amuses me and your son. I hope you know that the entire time we were exchanging grins while he, M, and I put up the garage door, it was because we find you adorably amusing, not an irritation. Also, thanks for being tolerant of my odd eccentric quirks. And J2 and I demolishing the dvd player last night out of spite.

Dear Kaetchen,

You cleaned the desk! Thanks :) You put things in odd places but it amused me and is going to have me giggling this morning so I appreciate it. Plus the desk looks much nicer.

CaroPhoenix
12-16-2008, 01:10 AM
Dear R @ Medical Supply Company,

Thank you very much! The box came today via UPS. I now have a mask I can use! :) I'm so happy! Now all I have to do is convince Child Rum she wants to go to sleep & then I can go to sleep myself and try it out!

Happy Happy Joy Joy,
Rummy

AdminAssistant
12-16-2008, 01:36 AM
Dear University Parking,

Your suck just shot up into epic proportions. I just hate you.

~ The grumpy TA who wants to park in the frickin' garage!!


Dear native Kansans,

I realize that you are all used to snow and ice and below freezing temps and all that. I am not, even though this is my 3rd winter in the MidWest. So, I am going to walk around bundled up with not an inch of exposed flesh. I am going to drive slowly because there is ICE on the roads! And I'm going to do my darndest not to leave my house in icky conditions. So you can all kiss my Southern ASS!!! I'll be laughing at you this summer when you complain about how unbelievably hot it is when it's a whopping 95 degrees outside.

~ The Arkansan

Dear Absurdists,

Seriously, you're all just fucking nuts. Some of you are, indeed, geniuses (Beckett, I'm looking at you). But, seriously, what the hell were some of you thinking? I think some of this is just a big practical joke..."Ooh, how about I just write a play with no dialogue and the lights flash and that's it. That'll fuck with the historians!"

Dear Teacher,

The entire point with Absurdism is that there is no point. It's all meaningless!! So...why are we reading a book that tries to lump them all together under a theme? Isn't that...I..buh..wuh...

*sigh*

And I haven't even got to Genet yet. DAMN.

Misanthropical
12-16-2008, 03:45 AM
Dear husband and children,

You guys all rock out loud! You all gave me kick ass birthday presents. Cleaned the house and didn't fight! It was GREAT!

Kisses for all of you guys!


Dear husband,

You got me a card that said how sweet our time together is. I had to point out that we don't have any time together!

You told me that will change since next weekend you are giving your two weeks notice at the weekend job. It's about damn time! I was feeling very neglected!

I don't like feeling neglected, especially from my own husband!

EVERYONE DO A HAPPY DANCE WITH ME ABOUT MY HUSBAND QUITTING HIS WEEKEND JOB OR ELSE! ;)


Dear BossMan,

You need to fire Whiner, before she has a horrible accident involving her head going through a computer monitor. :angel:

Becks
12-16-2008, 04:33 AM
Dear Mis,

:happy dance:

Love,

Becks

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dear MOTH™,

I really do appreciate the fact that you went out, got yesterday's paper, clipped coupons and decided it's time to do a decent amount of shopping. Really.

HOWEVER, I'll be damned if I appreciate the fact that I, after working 6 :censored: hours at a damn grocery store, had to go with you to a total of FOUR stores, and another one to go to tomorrow.

When it's at LEAST -2 degrees out there. And I don't even want to start to think about thinking about the wind chill.

Cold and cranky,

me

RootedPhoenix
12-16-2008, 04:53 AM
Dear Mis,

*happy dances* *throws streamers* YAY!

I'm so glad. :D

--RP

draftermatt
12-16-2008, 11:35 AM
EVERYONE DO A HAPPY DANCE WITH ME ABOUT MY HUSBAND QUITTING HIS WEEKEND JOB OR ELSE! ;)


Dear Mis,

You can't see this but I am dancing with myself in my chair.

It may have something to do with the song on the radio and the fact the office is empty, but per your instructions...

Dear Knees,

You felt good this morning when I first got up. Even after I tripped over the dog. Why are you sore now?

Dear Potential Employers,

I'm sorry I've got an engineering degree instead of a CAD degree. However, I went to a tech high school for CAD, and I have over 7 years of experience. I want the hell out of this company!

CaroPhoenix
12-16-2008, 12:03 PM
Dear Mis,

As per your instructions:

*does the Meposian Dance of Joy*

Thought I'd be different :D
Rummy

PhotoChick
12-16-2008, 03:16 PM
Dear Stupid,

I gave you the benefit of the doubt all those months ago when you brought your son over to with you when you got drunk. I was worried for you when you showed up with stinky at the bar. Of course you stupidly made no plans to get home even though you knew stinky wanted to take you home and you knew you weren't gonna go with him. So when you got "stuck" at the house and the boyfriend offered to let stay you should have been greatful. With the people already staying at the house there was no extra room so he let you stay in the bed with us. Then you proceeded to be annoying and loud. Thats the last time you ever have something nice done for you.

Me

Evil Queen
12-16-2008, 03:22 PM
EVERYONE DO A HAPPY DANCE WITH ME ABOUT MY HUSBAND QUITTING HIS WEEKEND JOB OR ELSE! ;)


Dear Mis,

I knew this Avatar would come in handy. :D

-EQ

iradney
12-16-2008, 03:46 PM
Dear Mis

WOOHOO!!!! *does a little dance, makes a little love, gets down tonight, gets down tonight*

Rads

Princess-Snake
12-16-2008, 09:26 PM
Dear Mis,
I'd do the happy dance, but my left knee is still numb. So I'll do a happy right leg dance!

Dear Fingerpricks,
Ow. Why must fingers be so sensitive?

Dear Daddy,
Thanks for bringing up some no rinse shampoo. My hair and I desperately need it.

SengaKitty
12-16-2008, 10:20 PM
Dear Mis

-does happy dances all around the room- So happy for you love :D


Dear SO,
Do you realize how amazing you are? No you don't . you've told me so yourself. Well let me tell you what. In my entire life, I've never felt as special, and beautiful, and wanted, and needed, as you make me feel. I've never felt sexy, or desireable. But in the past seven months, you've made me feel all of these things.
I've never been free to come and go as I pleased, even if I did have my own car and job, and was paying all the bills. Now, even without a car, or a job, you don't care where I go, or what I do, so long as the house is clean, and we've got time together. you don't berate me for having my own friends. you don't think I'm shallow because sometimes I just want to do something to feel pretty. you even complement me when you come home to see I've done something to make myself feel pretty. you notice the small things, AND remark on them. Do you know that I've never had anyone do that? Do you know most women don't have someone to do that? Do you know how remarkable that actually is?

I feel sexy around you. I feel loved, and beautiful. I don't feel like the fat pig I see in the mirror when I'm around you. Thank you for giving me that freedom.

Keep it up, and I might just become the beautiful woman in my head, that you say I am. I may actually start believing you all the time, instead of just occasionally...

Don't break my heart... Please?

I love you forever always and a millinium

your faerie girl

CaroPhoenix
12-16-2008, 11:33 PM
Dear body,

Well, it was confirmed that I have an ear infection. Thank you ... NOT! Plus I still have a low-grade temperature. :cry: I don't want to be sick for Christmas!

Unhappy,
Rummy

------------------------------------------------------------------
Dear Stupid Sonny,

Thank you for letting me know that I don't have to work for you the day before & the dy after Christmas. Now I can rest. :D

Happily,
Rummy

---------------------------------------------------------------------
Dear manufacturers of my antibiotics,

Why do they have to be so huge and fat? They're impossible to swallow!

Choking,
Rummy

Princess-Snake
12-16-2008, 11:47 PM
Dear idrinkarum,
I hear ya on the pills. I can't figure out what's worse: choking on a godzilla pill mixed with an ungodly amount of water trying to get it down, or choking on a godzilla pill that tastes lik someone had stuck a cherry up his ass and farted it into the medicine cup.

Feel better soon!

the_std
12-17-2008, 02:28 AM
Dear Sleep,

I know I've been neglecting you lately. It's hard when there is a pretty, pretty man in my bed! So please, tonight, when there are no men and no distractions and no anything elses, can you and I spend some, ahem, quality time? :eyewaggle:

I promise to buy you dinner first!

Longingly,
Me

Misanthropical
12-17-2008, 03:18 AM
Dear BossMan,

You rock out loud! First for getting the hint when I said a girl could use Whiner's desk, since Whiner doesn't get in till 3:15 3:20. Yes, I saw you run outside at 3 and I knew it was to see when she would get to work.

Tonight you called from your desk to hers, but she didn't pick up, because she was actually taking a call. You walked over to her and said "I called the ONE TIME you are working?" Thank you for letting me see that ice burn!

Also, you got it where I would get to stay home on Christmas Eve and New Years Eve by switching my time around and getting paid for it all. YOU ROCK!

RetailWorkhorse
12-17-2008, 06:18 AM
EVERYONE DO A HAPPY DANCE WITH ME ABOUT MY HUSBAND QUITTING HIS WEEKEND JOB OR ELSE! ;)

Dear Mis,

*NUMA NUMA DANCE*

Tired now,
RW


Dear Sore Throat,

Please oh please oh please for the love of Dog, don't get worse!

-The Rest Of Me

Dear Dog,

Thanks for sending me into a spiral of self-loathing. That was fun. Now that that's over with, THIS MEANS WAR, YOU SLOBBERING MUTT! I'LL SHOW YOU TO BEAT ME DOWN LIKE THAT!

-Your (pissed) Devoted

Evil Queen
12-17-2008, 06:22 AM
Dear RW,

Get this stuff:

http://well.ca/images/medium/products/chloraseptic-lozenges-honey-lemo_1215616273_MED.png

Much love,
Your Sis.

Shangri-laschild
12-17-2008, 01:19 PM
Dear Matt,

I don't think I'll ever understand you. I'm actually ok with that though. The random text last night was fun. I get that you're as bad if not a bit worse than me at remembering to call people and keeping in touch and I miss us hanging out. I was amused to see you wanted to chat and even though the result was that I didn't get completely to sleep till 01:34 or so, I'm still glad. I'm hoping that we actually will hang out sometime soon because I miss my movie buddy.

Bectar

iradney
12-17-2008, 04:29 PM
Dear TTO

Don't you DARE get all passive aggressive about how there aren't any clean dishes. I AM NOT THE ONLY PERSON IN THIS HOUSE! In fact, I think you should talk to your sister about how maybe SHE can help out around the house while she's staying here, and turning the lights OFF when she leaves the spare room.
PLEH on you!

Not taking this PA bullshit
Rads

CaroPhoenix
12-17-2008, 07:42 PM
Dear Rads,

:hug:

Hope it gets better soon!
Rummy

RootedPhoenix
12-17-2008, 09:11 PM
Dear ice,

Could you please LOOK like ice? I really want to get to my finals in one piece. Thanks.

--RP

Dear PMS,

DIAF! One fueled by grease and a pile of rubber tires. :mad:

--RP

Dear pain meds and yoga,

You rock.

--RP

Misanthropical
12-18-2008, 02:59 AM
Dear husband,

I should have known that you are not good at getting hints, since it took you almost a month to realize that much younger woman was totally into you. Luckily, you figured it out and we have now been married 17 years.

Given that, I should know that unless I come right out and say it, you are not going to pick up on the fact that I miss you. Yes, we see each other for a few hours a night, but I miss the times we had time together ALONE!


Dear BossMan,

Thank you for letting me go home tonight, since I was in pain. I hope you are not too upset that I won't be in tomorrow. Yes, my friend won't be in either, but we didn't plan it that way, so don't think we are together playing hooky.

I realize I was out last week, but every time I have taken off I came back with a doctor's note. I won't have one on Friday, since I have the medication I need here. I hope you don't get upset with me.

You know I do my job and I don't slack off at work, nor do I always try to cut out early, so please don't get all bent out of shape about it, okay? I like my job and don't want to lose it, so forgive me.


Dear fake Christian woman who sits next to me,

I realize you think I'm some sort of evil, since I have a voodoo doll and plastic skulls on my desk, but I'm actually a good person with a warped sense of humor.

You are extremely rude to me, you won't speak to me unless I speak to you first and then you act like it's a horrible burden. I come in 12:30 PM while you guys are having your party and you don't even offer me so much as a crumb, but when the slut girl (who flat out told you she wants to get pregnant by some random guy who will take off after getting her pregnant) comes in at 3:20 PM you can't offer her enough food or drink? I was upset that you didn't think to offer me so much as a cookie, since I was really hungry, but I didn't say anything, but explain to me how I'm the more evil one, after all, I married the man I wanted to be the father of my children and am still married to him. He is the father of all three of my children, but I'm some how more evil than the slut girl?

I really wanted to ask you how you justify your behavior towards me and still call yourself a Christian. You haven't done a single thing to make me want to ask you where you go to church and if I could go with you. You actually prove my point that those who scream the loudest about being good Christians are actually quite the opposite.


Dear friend,

You never cease to crack me up! A huge chicken needed for a voodoo sacrifice? You really are warped! That is one of the reasons I like you!


Dear Whiner,

You actually came in only 5 minutes late? I take it BossMan ripped a strip out of you yesterday when you tried to stroll in 15 minutes late. I wish I could have seen it!

Yes, I did leave when you were busy doing what ever you do when you pretend to work, because I was in pain and didn't want to deal with your wanting to know every little thing that goes on. I hope you didn't bug the shit out of my friend to find out why I left. She hates that, since she thinks if I wanted you to know I would have told you.

Yes, I did pretend to not notice that you got new glasses the other day, because I refuse to be drawn into your constant need for attention. I find it tiring and wish you would get a life. The rest of us have a life and don't feel the need to constantly need to be the center of attention. It's why the rest of us don't dress in the brightest flashiest clothes we can find and don't dress in clothes that scream to look at our fat. You should know that none of it is flattering or sexy or what ever the hell look you are going for.

Grow up and start acting your age.

RetailWorkhorse
12-18-2008, 03:08 AM
Dear RW,

Get this stuff:

http://well.ca/images/medium/products/chloraseptic-lozenges-honey-lemo_1215616273_MED.png

Much love,
Your Sis.

Dear EQ,

Wally WOrld only had the cherry flavour! EWWWWWWW!

-RW

Dear Dog,

Today I tossed my cookies. I didn't get buy 3 hours of sleep thanks to the sore throat getting worse. I had a really shitty day at work because I had no energy to do anything and I felt REALLY bad about that. And the Big Boss is supposed to be coming tomorrow.

Touche, Dog, touche.

But you will not get the best of me!

I have Zicam. It works on me now.

I have Ricola. It soothes my throat even though I have to eat just about all of them like CANDY.

I have Ginger Ale.

You will not hear the last of me.

- Your (still peeved) Devoted.

monolayth
12-18-2008, 03:14 AM
Dear Body,

Ok I get it. you don't like me this week. Please give me warning ok?

ill,

Mono.

iradney
12-18-2008, 05:28 AM
Dear self

Pull yourself together! You have 2 days of work left, and then you're on 4 glorious weeks of leave! Better still, TBS will be buggering off to another state on Saturday for 2 weeks, so you and your BF can actually, I dunno, have some time alone!!
I have a sneaking suspicion, self, that you might be heading for a breakdown at some point down the line. Pull your farking socks up!

Rads

Dear TBS

I have given you numbers and names of estate agents. I have looked online for apartments. Yesterday I got the newspaper and gave you the property section. Which you haven't even looked at. I swear to Dog, if you are still here by the end of January, I will NOT be impressed with you. I love you to bits, I do. But TTO and I have CHOSEN to live ALONE for a REASON. I might be forced to do PA things like have really really loud sex with your brother so that you will get the hint and GET YOUR OWN PLACE.
By the way, since you're staying here RENT FREE, would it kill you to help out around the house? All you do when you get home is plonk your skinny butt in front of your PC and watch series. I know it doesn't look like TTO and I do much, but FFS, when you INVITE YOURSELF to stay with someone, and you don't pay rent, the LEAST you can do is load and unload the fsking dishwasher.

Rads

Dear TTO

I'm sorry. I'm going a bit mad. I hate this time of year. My parents are in Canuckistan, my BFF's mom was diagnosed with Breast Cancer (treatable, but still, now BFF has to go for tests to see if she carries the gene). Another friend's baby had a HUGE operation on Friday on her HEART when she was just under 2 weeks old.

I'm worried as hell about you because I know you're under a shit load of stress trying to get your business up and running again after you spent about a month visiting your mom, dealing with your sister's drama and worrying about YOUR mom - Btw, I'm also worried to death about her, and I wish you would talk to me about it.

I also hate this time of year because I'm always reminded of how my sister isn't here anymore. Yes, I know it's been 7.5 years, but seeing your older sister pass away in a hospital bed isn't exactly something you can just forget that easily.

I'm ticked off with work because I STILL haven't gotten a decent PC - the one I have freezes if I try to open a new tab in Firefox and it ticks me the hell off!

I'm worried as all hell about my finances as work doesn't seem to be paying me enough, and I'm struggling to get my farking credit card paid off without having to do things like live on ramen for a month. I feel like I'm stagnating because I'm slowly starting to hate my job, and think that I'm never going to get anywhere. I'm sorry for taking it out on you, especially when it's a case of the straw that broke the camel's back. Just bear with me. I'm going to start looking for a new job, and we can actually get the paperwork for Canada started when I'm on leave.

Worried about my (and your) mental health

Rads

Dear Forum

Sorry for whinging so much. I promise I'll be better soon. Hopefully. Maybe if I take enough alcohol this year will be over soon enough and I can actually start again.

Rads

RootedPhoenix
12-18-2008, 10:33 AM
Dear Rads,

*hugs and offers chocolate* Hope it gets better.

--RP

MannersMakethMan
12-18-2008, 12:12 PM
Dear Rads,

Never feel you have to apologise to us - we're here for you to do just that if you need to *sends all manner of baked goods your way*. I hope all gets better, but don't feel you have to wait until next year to start again - each day is a brand new start to something.

Best wishes,

MMM

Dear Sister,

No, we are not a taxi service, and this is not a hotel. Quarter to four in the morning is extracting the michael. Grow up, put on your big girl pants, and for goodness sake give us a hand with something. Anything. Because it's mostly your mess, and I'm fed up of wading through it.

Running out of patience,

Your brother

kaetchen
12-18-2008, 04:34 PM
Dear almost Mother in Law,

W.T.F.? You confuse the hell out of me on a daily basis. Why do you call me then talk to my fiance and ask him if he could use anything because you didn't get him a "care package" for finals, then when he says "Oh, I ran out of coffee, that'd be nice to have right now before I leave to go to the lab." you say "Okay, well I'll see you tomorrow or Saturday then." ????

Thank you for making the fiance depressed and grouchy.


Dear M,
Yeah, I know I was at your show last night, I sure as hell wasn't there to see you. In fact, I had NO idea you were even playing. We were trying to see C's band play, but it was too late by the time they would have been on stage.

Stop glaring at me.
No love, Me.
P.S.
You're the one that dumped my fiance all those years ago for your EX. You can't get upset like this almost 5 years after the fact. That's just ridiculous. Also, stop sending him crazy e-mails congratulating him and at the end saying "I can't come to your wedding anyways. I'll be in EUROPE looking at hot EUROPEAN MEN. I'll be too busy looking at them to care. SEE YOU NEVER FRIEND!"

Take your meds plz,
Kitty

KiaKat
12-18-2008, 04:50 PM
Dear RW,

http://www.tealand.com/ThroatCoat.asp

Buy it at a health food store, combine it with the Zicam, and you should be 100% very soon. Be sure to get the lemon flavour, it's delicious.

Sympathetically (just getting over my own version of that nasty bug),

Kia

CaroPhoenix
12-18-2008, 11:59 PM
Dear Mother,

Thank you so much for reminding me that I'm 36 and my eggs are getting really old. Besides, I thought you didn't want me to have any more kids as I'm one of the most horrible mothers on earth.

Please make up your mind.

Your Daughter

----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dear ears,

Please respond to the antibiotics! I don't want to put drops in my ears. :cry:

Rummy

Evil Queen
12-19-2008, 12:41 AM
Dear Rum's "Mother",

Go suck a hose, ya meanie!

-EQ


Dear Rum,

Ignore the heathen.

Your friend,
-EQ

SengaKitty
12-19-2008, 04:01 AM
Dear Rum's "mother",
Leave my friend alone -growl-

Dear Rummy,
I has cookies :D

Dear Traffic Court Judge
Someone should buy you something really big and shiney for the holidays cause you totally rock out loud :D. Thank you for understanding the situation and dismissing all charges :D

Dear Prosecutor Lady,
I hope you get something big and shiney too for assisting in the dismissal of charges and not believing the stupid cop who said I was stopped in a left hand lane with my blinker on, when I was simply slowed down trying to get over to get on the highway, since I didn't know the area. you too rock out loud :D

RetailWorkhorse
12-19-2008, 04:29 AM
Dear RW,

http://www.tealand.com/ThroatCoat.asp

Buy it at a health food store, combine it with the Zicam, and you should be 100% very soon. Be sure to get the lemon flavour, it's delicious.

Sympathetically (just getting over my own version of that nasty bug),

Kia

Dear KiaKat,

Sadly, am allergic to licorice root.

Will make Daz Mel heave cookies.

-In agony,
Daz Mel

ParkingWitch
12-19-2008, 08:30 AM
Dear Idiot Drivers,

Yes that is freezing rain and freezing fog. Slow the hell down. I know they have been out salting all day, but you are still going to end up as ditch dwellers by trying to drive like it is a dry day in August.

No Love
One Cranky Witch

* I saw at least 12 of these buttmunches in 20 miles on the way home tonight*

:confused:

CaroPhoenix
12-19-2008, 09:52 AM
Dear EQ and RHPG,

Thank you for your support!

Cookies and Rum are always appreciated. :D

This is why I have the name I do ... y'all would drink too if you had my family & my in-laws. Someday I will be sane again. LOL

In solidarity,
Rummy

SengaKitty
12-19-2008, 10:12 AM
Dear Rummy,

Oh hon, believe me I know where you're coming from... Remember that my mother wrote a statement to the judge on my MIL's behalf.... 'Nuff said... I'll pass the rum if you pass the vodka...

Much love
Rhpg

CaroPhoenix
12-19-2008, 12:46 PM
Dear Rhpg,

I forgot about your mom. :o Yup, you know how I feel. Gah ... Mothers! And you know what? It's against the law to do anything to them. (Not that I would, mind you, but sometimes ... I can just divorce her, right? Besides when we move to MD or PA come 2009/2010, both my mom & my MIL will be far away).

You get the vodka. I'll keep my Rum. :lol:

And we both get chocolate!

Rummy
------------------------------
Dear Bra Straps,

Please stay up!

That is all,
Rummy
------------------------------
Dear Shoulders,

Please do your job.

That is all also,
Rummy

persephone
12-19-2008, 10:50 PM
Dear Rum's Momma:

LAY OFF!!! She's a grown woman -- let her live her own life!

And being a Momma, especially of an autistic child, is difficult, if you might remember. She's doing her best!!

No love,

Persephone




Dear Grocery Clerk,

I appreciate that you thought you were doing me a favor pointing out that the bananas I was buying were "bruised" (ripe) but trust me, I know what I'm doing. I KNOW they're very ripe. That's why they're marked down. I WANT them very ripe. The riper the better for banana bread.

I know you meant well, but please, once you point out that they are very ripe and I say "Yes, I know. Thank you." you do NOT need to keep telling me and trying to get me to go back and get different bananas. I want these. Is that so hard? :rolleyes:

Your baking customer

AdminAssistant
12-20-2008, 01:42 AM
Dear Family,

I am coming home tomorrow for approximately a week and a half. So..for the 9 or so days that I will be there, could you all be as sane as humanly possible? For my sake? I'm not even taking work with me, just some casual, FUN reading since I never get to read fun things anymore. I would really like to just chill and relax and spend time with the family that I love. So, Dad, set down the bottle for a little while, mkay? And quit being so damn passive/aggressive. Mom, no clingy-ness, please. Yes, I'll wrap all the presents and will certainly help you make baked goods. Sis, we need a day for just us to hang out sans parents. Extended family, I'm not getting married or having children anytime soon. Stop asking. And yes, I do know I'll be in school until I'm 30 and I'm fine with this. College friends, I really want to see you all. Please provide escape routes from the family insanity - especially you, BFF.

*bracing for the holidays*
~ me

SengaKitty
12-20-2008, 01:57 AM
Dear Phone,

Please ring

That is all


"Dear" Idiot
you got lucky. you're lucky i can talk my way out of just about anything, and you'll be really lucky if the courts here don't find you and fine you for not registering the car that is in your name, because you couldn't be bothered to send me the title. Be glad they didn't fine ME because you would have received it as a yule tide present
No love
Rhpg

Misanthropical
12-20-2008, 03:19 AM
Dear BossMan,

1. Thank you for not being upset that I wasn't at work yesterday.

2. Thank you for letting us go home early today, that rocked out loud!


Dear StinkyCow,

Stop trying to do things that you think make you look important. No one cares what you want or what you are trying to do. The rest of our coworkers won't tell you to your face, because you would go whining and crying to BossMan about how utterly mean people are to you for no reason at all! WAAAHH!

I also notice that no matter what shift is having food, your fat ass is there! Where ever free food is, so are you. You will push people out of the way to get all the food you can for yourself and your six kids.

Also, the security guard told me you smell like you dunk your whole body into a vat of cheap nasty perfume. Yes, everyone notices YOU STINK!

I had to get change out of an envelope you put money in. Guess what? Your cheap ass perfume was coating the money you put in there and it took me using Purex and washing my hands three times to get that rank shit off my hands.

Now, read this part carefully or have someone to read it for you, since I know you have trouble with words with more than three letters in them. Ready? Okay here it is "STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME AND MY DESK! YOU NASTY SKANK!" Keep reading it till it gets past the layers of perfume and makes it to your brain. If you don't I will cough and keep coughing till you go away. You know like nonsmokers do to smokers who around them.


Dear guys in my house,

Thank you for putting up the Christmas tree, so I didn't have to bother with it.


Dear Big Guy,

It was not funny telling your little brother that I hate Christmas. He was really worried about why his mommy would hate Christmas. It was not funny and he didn't appreciate the joke either when he found out I don't hate Christmas.

I do dislike Christmas, but none of you know that, so there. :p

RetailWorkhorse
12-20-2008, 04:05 AM
Dear, uh, body?

....wash a pot and make mac and cheese, or micro-zap some giant pretzels?

Wash a pot and make mac and cheese, or micro-zap some giant pretzels?

Wash a pot......micro-zap pretzels.....

Choices.

On the one hand, mac and Cheese makes me a happy Mel when it's got hot spicy stuff in it.

On the other hand, I'm still slightly sick and I'm getting tired.

Yet on the other hand, spicy mac and cheese will help clear my poor sinuses faster, which are starting to drain like a dry fall after two straight months of rain.

But on yet another hand, I have work at 10am tomorrow and I really need the sleep.

Hmm.....choices.....a decision that may not be made tonight.

Dammit.

-Sighingly,
Ar-Dubya

Amethyst Hunter
12-20-2008, 04:19 AM
Dubya

Dear RW,

Don't talk so horribly about yourself like that! :eek: ;)

- AH

--

Dear family/world,

Piss off. :burnup:

No love right now, Me

--

Dear Certain People Who Have Done Things Recently That Very Much Displease Me, (don't worry, it ain't any of you guys here)

Fuck off, eat shit and DIAF. Not necessarily in that order.

- AH

persephone
12-20-2008, 04:32 AM
Dear Amethyst Hunter,

I'm sorry things are rough and crappy right now! I empathize and promise not to try and make you feel better til you're ready.

But want to tell me where these people are so that I can go kick them good and hard for making your life difficult? You don't deserve that!

*hugs and good thoughts whenever you're ready for them, along with banana bread*

Persephone

Chazzie
12-20-2008, 04:49 AM
Dear Mrs. Boss,

Pleasepleaseplease don't call me into work tomorrow. Pleeaase. It'll be busy since it's right before Christmas, and it's always unbearably busy on Saturdays -anyway-. And I only got 6 hours of sleep last night, and if you call tomorrow morning I probably won't get any more. I've been stressed and tired and frustrated, so let me have that one last day off. I don't enjoy walking for an hour to work in less than 24 degree weather in ice and snow and then staying on my feet for hours.

... Even though I said I wanted more hours. :doh:

-Your Employee-Who-Can't-Say-No,
Chaz

Dear Community College.

I know you have a sadistic sense of humor watching kids try and sign up for your classes. I know you try your damndest to make it as hard as possible for us to do so.

But PLEASE. WITH A CHERRY. Let me be able to sign up this time! It's my second time trying and I think I will go crazy if all my friends go to College this semester and I'm stuck for another half year.

-Your Frustrated Student-to-be,
Chaz

RetailWorkhorse
12-20-2008, 04:55 AM
Dear RW,

Don't talk so horribly about yourself like that! :eek: ;)

- AH

Dear Ame,

...The FRACK?!

-Confused as to why he's being picked on so much tonight
Ar-DOUBLE-U.

Amethyst Hunter
12-20-2008, 05:18 AM
...The FRACK?!
Ar-DOUBLE-U.

Whatever your faults, I'm sure that you're nowhere near as bad as a certain infamous government-type (aka "Dubya"). ;)

Wondering if there is a way to make protein-infused sugarfree cookies to send to you as peace offering,

- AH

RetailWorkhorse
12-20-2008, 05:22 AM
Whatever your faults, I'm sure that you're nowhere near as bad as a certain infamous government-type (aka "Dubya"). ;)

Wondering if there is a way to make protein-infused sugarfree cookies to send to you as peace offering,

- AH

I am still confused. I thought Dubya was W from Alton Brown!

persephone
12-20-2008, 05:48 AM
I am still confused. I thought Dubya was W from Alton Brown!

There's a good number of people in this world that call W (a.k.a. George W. Bush, our president for a few more weeks) "Dubya".

RetailWorkhorse
12-20-2008, 05:51 AM
There's a good number of people in this world that call W (a.k.a. George W. Bush, our president for a few more weeks) "Dubya".

*blink-blink-blink*

So.....no Invader Zim?

Which reminds me, I need to download that. Find out why EQ likes Gir so much.

crazylegs
12-20-2008, 10:20 PM
'Dear' Work Collegues

The party sucked. Big time. Somebody remind me why we went to a location where a vodka and coke cost us £5.60? Whoever organised it needs to take notes from below!

Yours, stingily

Crazylegs

=================

Dear <organisation> chums,

Now THAT is how to do a Christmas do! Not only did I learn how some young ladies like to drink tequila I had a fun boogie and remained cheerfully drunk all night! :D

Yours, eager for the next social

Crazylegs

Evil Queen
12-21-2008, 12:22 AM
*blink-blink-blink*

So.....no Invader Zim?

Which reminds me, I need to download that. Find out why EQ likes Gir so much.

Dear RW,
All you need to know is "YOUR HEAD SMELLS LIKE A PUPPY!" and "Why'd you do that?!?!" "I left it at home." "WHY!?!?" "To make room for the cupcake!"
"Why is there bacon in the soap?!" followed by "I made it myyyyyyyy self!"
"Awww... I wanted to explode...."

Fin.
-Your sis.

RetailWorkhorse
12-21-2008, 12:55 AM
Dear RW,
All you need to know is "YOUR HEAD SMELLS LIKE A PUPPY!" and "Why'd you do that?!?!" "I left it at home." "WHY!?!?" "To make room for the cupcake!"
"Why is there bacon in the soap?!" followed by "I made it myyyyyyyy self!"
"Awww... I wanted to explode...."

Fin.
-Your sis.
Dear EQ,

I changed my mind. YOU download the silly thing and burn me a copy.

-Your Bro

Evil Queen
12-21-2008, 01:01 AM
Dear RW,

Okay.

-EQ

the_std
12-21-2008, 02:54 PM
Dear EQ,

It was me! I was the turkey all along!

Zimmingly,
Me

monolayth
12-21-2008, 04:50 PM
Dear Gir lovers,

"Hi, floor make me a sammach!"

that is all,

amused mono.

iradney
12-21-2008, 05:05 PM
Dear muscles

STOP WITH THE PAIN ALREADY!!! *sobs*

Love
Rads

Elspeth
12-21-2008, 08:05 PM
Dear Snow,

GO. THE. HELL. AWAY!!! I like you, in a dusting. Everything is pretty and then you go away. I don't like you in the 6 to 8 inches we have now. Can we at least get out of the house on Tuesday. My mom has a very important appointment on Wednesday that she needs to get to. and I would like to finish my christmas shopping dang it. So can we stop, please? *pouts and bats eyes*

*looks out the window, dang it. It is snowing again*

Els

monolayth
12-21-2008, 08:43 PM
Dear people who live in my call center's territory.

You know its too cold, and that there is much snow and ice. Please for the love that is all good stay home! or at least do not call us!.

Seriously, you knew better!

Busy and over worked,

Mono.

Dear friends and life,

I know all I have been doing is working and sleeping lately. I do miss you! I will see you again sometime when people start cooperating with the weather. until then, I earn lots of overtime.

faking sympathy for people in the midwest,

mono.

CaroPhoenix
12-22-2008, 03:23 AM
Dear Child Rum,

It's almost 11:30 at night! You better go to bed now. I'm tired of talking to Santa about your behavior. :mad:

Love,
Your Mommy

----------------------------------------------------------------
Dear Mom,

You tell me I'm a horrible daughter and a horrible mother. Then my family & I go out last night and do family things & all of a sudden you're worried about me? :confused: Will you please make up your mind?

Love,
Your Daughter

SengaKitty
12-22-2008, 03:27 AM
Dear Child Rum,

Give mommy some Mommy time, or Santa won't be happy.

Love
Mommy's friend


Dear Rummy's mom

Leave your daughter alone or start acting like a mother. She's a wonderful person and a great mother. Stop being a bitch.

No love
your daughter's friend who also has a mother who can't be a mother

iradney
12-22-2008, 05:09 AM
Dear Rummy's mom

Good lord woman, is your life that boring that you need to stir up drama in your daughter's life? Grow up already! Sheesh!

Hope you get handkerchiefs for Christmas
Rads

Dear RUM

*SQUISHIES* you're awesome :)

Love
Rads

CaroPhoenix
12-22-2008, 01:33 PM
Dear RHPG & Rads,

Thank you for the words! I was ranting at my husband in the middle of the parking lot of the local sporting goods store yesterday morning after I got off the cell phone with her. She really does confuse me.

As for the good mother thing? :D I try to be. :o I had to put Child Rum back into her bed 2 times last night. The second time was a charm so-to-say. She stayed in bed until 8:45 AM (when the telephone rang). It even woke me up! Getting up in the middle of the night really does a number on your sleep cycle. :lol: Right now, I'm drinking my coffee-flavored-water. :D

Aaaaah .... Good times!
Rummy

Becks
12-23-2008, 03:24 AM
Dear winter,

You suck.

Loathingly,

Me

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dear legs and feet,

I know you hurt. Only register 3 has a decent mat to stand on.

Just a couple more days.

Me

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dear Lizziebeff,

Thanks for hauling me all over yesterday and today. I really appreciate it.

Love,

your favoritist sister

Bella_Vixen
12-23-2008, 04:00 AM
Dear Becks--

You are most very welcome.

:wave:

*singing A Little Respect*

--Me


************************************************** *********

Dear Me--

Why am I such a jewelry snob?

--Me

************************************************** *********

Dear MOAO--

I haven't heard from you in a week and a half.

Make me come down there. :devil:

--YOAO

************************************************** **********

Dear city of Green Bay--

You suck long and you suck hard and NOT in a good way.

Where is my damn pizza?!?!

--a VERY pissed off me

************************************************** *********

Dear people who refuse to read the rest of the Outlander series--

I understand your issues with the first book.

I had a time getting over the descriptions, myself.

READ at least one of the other 5 books in the series before you condemn ALL the books.

--not crazed, but I like the series

persephone
12-23-2008, 04:01 AM
Dear Daughter and Son,

Thank you for being so very very good today at Daddy's Christmas party and on the drive up here. Thank you for being well behaved at Gramma and Granpa's all evening. I know you're excited for Christmas and I know you're trying so very hard!

I love you both very very much!

Love,

Mommy



Dear IDaR's Mom,

LAY OFF, LADY!!!

No love.




Dear IDaR,

I'm sending you good thoughts for the next few days in dealing with any family and family gatherings you have to. I hope you and Child Rum have a good Christmas, however you have to do it. I hope Mr. Rum stops being dumb.

We're here if you need to vent!

*hugs*

Persephone

Becks
12-23-2008, 04:03 AM
Dear Lizziebeff,

:Singing along with you. LOUDLY. And off key:

:lol:

Love,

Becks

Evil Queen
12-23-2008, 04:06 AM
Dear Whoever,

Am I going to get a christmas doggie? Please? I waited for a birthday doggie and didn't get one. Now I'm waiting for a christmas doggie. I badly need a doggie even though I'm working full time. I need one, want one and will love him or her very very much. I promise to take good care of the furry one.

I hate christmas,
-Evil Queen

draftermatt
12-23-2008, 11:19 AM
Dear EQ,

When I read your post all I could think of is "I will love him and squeeze him"

Though I hope you get a Christmas poochie if you want one.

Dear Granny,

It sucks that you're alive and your mind is mostly dead. I know you'd rather be dead than deal with this... I miss you.

AdminAssistant
12-23-2008, 02:20 PM
Dear Monster,

Thank you for being so good! I never get to spend time with you when you come to Nana's house because Nana doesn't know how to share! :p You're a very sweet little boy.

~ Your Aunt

BoyThing,

Thanks for the heads up that you had strep. Now I'll be paranoid anytime I cough. And where exactly did you get strep, hm?

Teasingly,
Me

crazylegs
12-23-2008, 05:47 PM
Dear Self,

Ignorance really is bliss.

Yours,

Self.

Dear Grandpa,

I'm worried about you, Granny is worried about you, in fact everyone is worried about you, I'm glad that we'll have one last Christmas without something hanging over us.

I do rather hope, but think it is, that it's not going to be bad news.

Yours, concerened

Crazylegs

Elspeth
12-23-2008, 05:54 PM
Dear Weather,

YOU SUCK! Can we stop with the snow? NOW!

Cabin Fever ridden, possibly cancelling Christmas pissed off person
Els

Dear Hubby,
Thank you for driving this morning. You did much better then I would have. and wonderful driving to get us out of the slid we got into (45 degrees from where we were going) Love you

Els

and because I need to.


AAAARRRRGGGGHHHHHHHH *cries*

KiaKat
12-23-2008, 06:08 PM
Dear Bella,

I'm a Jewelry Snob too.

In Sparkly Happiness,

Kia.

--------
Dear IDaR,

Yay for kiddies who sleep late!

In Understanding,

Kia (the former nanny).

--------
Dear EQ,

Doggies are required. I hope you find one.

Squeezing her kitties,

Kia (the Kitty Mommy).

--------
Dear Customers Suck forum members,

MERRY CHRISTMAS! HAPPY CHANUKKAH! HAPPY KWANZAA! JOYOUS YULE!

AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR!

With many holiday wishes and love,

Kia.

Evil Queen
12-23-2008, 10:25 PM
Dear C,

I'm calling you out, ya little bitch. :pissed: You think you can ban me from Christmas with The SO? Think again, twitmonkey. The SO likes me better then he likes your 12 year old ass and has decided that, if his parents feel the same as you (HIGHLY unlikely since they seem to like me more then you a well), he isn't going. So tough cookies, bitch.

By the way, how you feel about me is kinda pathetic since I don't care about you. When I heard about your "banning" me from Christmas, I laughed.

Excuse me, whilst I do it again.
-The Evil Queen
AKA, the one who stole your brother and refuses to give him back.

the_std
12-23-2008, 11:02 PM
Dear Ninja,

I'm sorry, you're moving where?!

Taiwan?

... Awesome.

SengaKitty
12-23-2008, 11:12 PM
Dear Banks,

I'm DONE. Screw you guys, I'll get a mattress to stuff my monies in. No more business for you :rage:

RetailWorkhorse
12-24-2008, 03:02 AM
Dear C,

I'm calling you out, ya little bitch. :pissed: You think you can ban me from Christmas with The SO? Think again, twitmonkey. The SO likes me better then he likes your 12 year old ass and has decided that, if his parents feel the same as you (HIGHLY unlikely since they seem to like me more then you a well), he isn't going. So tough cookies, bitch.

By the way, how you feel about me is kinda pathetic since I don't care about you. When I heard about your "banning" me from Christmas, I laughed.

Excuse me, whilst I do it again.
-The Evil Queen
AKA, the one who stole your brother and refuses to give him back.

Dear EQ,

That is hilarious.

Swear to Dog.

-RW

Dear Somebody, Anybody, who's Listening in on my conversations with Dog,

If you could give me that push to recreate that story-movie-thing I watched in my head night before last so's I can write it down, that would be great. It was really enjoyable.

-That Artist

Dear Muse,

Get off your rump and make me settle on an angle for EQ's prompt, dammit!

-That Artist Over There

persephone
12-24-2008, 03:30 AM
Dear EQ,

Sounds like you're having a GREAT time dealing with SOs family! Want me to kick the twit for you? I will! :p

Also, if I win the lottery tomorrow night, I'm SO buying you a puppy. Any puppy you want. And anyone else on CS that wants something within reason will get it too. You know, IF I win the lottery. :lol:

Sorry about the twit. Hope she doesn't get her way! She needs to learn to deal with you! (I lucked out on the in law front -- Hubby's family and mine have been best friends since before I was born and all of my siblings and his married people we like and get along with, also getting a long with their families. Makes it really easy.)

*hugs*

Persephone




Dear In Laws and all of my family,

Thanks for being cool. I think I take y'all being so awesome for granted sometimes!

Love,

Your sister / daughter / daughter in law / sister in law / ect.

smileyeagle1021
12-24-2008, 12:44 PM
Dear Banks,

I'm DONE. Screw you guys, I'll get a mattress to stuff my monies in. No more business for you :rage:

Dear RHPG,
Take this
*slips RHPG a slip of paper with the names of credit unions (http://creditunionaccess.com/KY-Louisville-credit-unions.htm) in her city*

You can thank me later :)

Sincerely,
A lifelong convert from banks to Credit Unions

SengaKitty
12-24-2008, 01:46 PM
Dear Smiley,

I've been with a credit union before and might just go back...

hugs
Me


Dear Bank,
What do you MEAN you don't see where I've got a direct deposit coming through today???? I call your twenty-four hour banking system and it says i do.... you better not have fucked up my last paycheck... Oh, and that ten dollar check you asked me if I wanted paid? I didn't write it to look pretty yes I want it paid.... Fucking twits

Royally pissed
Rhpg

Dreamstalker
12-24-2008, 04:51 PM
Dear Southwest Airlines:

I know there are about 5,798,201 pieces of lost luggage right now and that you guys are doing the best you can. However, when ours was offloaded in Oakland on Sunday why didn't it stay there? Please tell me the FAA regulations on unattended luggage will be waived; you know who it belongs to.

If I do need to file a claim, please tell me that estimated values will be good enough. I'm honest, I promise!

MannersMakethMan
12-24-2008, 05:06 PM
Dear Sister,

The trouble with you is that you think you're so much better than us. Well, you're not. We've all either said, done, or seen what you're trying to slip past us on the sly. I knew full well you never had any intention of staying in. Fine and dandy, but when you need fetching at pretty nigh 5 o'clock in the morning, perhaps you'd consider a taxi next time. Yes, it's only a case of me getting up an hour earlier, but why should I have to? You'd never do the same reversed. And I don't appreciate being told I'm not allowed to make a noise in my own house until late afternoon because you're sleeping. Grow up, and get a sense of responsibility. There'd be no point mum and dad coming to you on their bad days would there?

You've also yet to learn that the opposite of love isn't hate. It's indifference. Figure that one out, and things begin to unravel ne c'est pas?

Get a clue, and give us a hand,

Your brother.

RootedPhoenix
12-25-2008, 02:54 AM
Dear self,

Learn to read labels. Then you won't ingest things you're not supposed to. >_<;;

--Me.

Dear Los Angeles,

You are large, and populated with many people. I like you, but you are really busy. I forgot how busy you are. ALSO YOU ARE HUGE. I don't know how I forgot that.

--The Chick Who Used to Live Near You

Dear Sacramento,

Thanks for being your crazy self. I'll be home in a few days.

--RP

draftermatt
12-25-2008, 10:21 AM
Dear Body,

5:35 AM on Christmas? I'm used to getting up this early yes but I was really looking forward to sleeping in a bit.

Of course then the dogs wanted out at 6 like they always do...

persephone
12-25-2008, 02:33 PM
Dear CSers,

Merry Christmas! I hope everyone got everything they want and gets to see everyone they love today. I wish you all a great year!

Love,

your VERY sleepy board member (I couldn't fall asleep until after 4:30 and all the kids only managed to sleep until 5:30 -- Mommy is SLEEPY!)

RootedPhoenix
12-25-2008, 03:58 PM
Dear sleepy CSers

I guess that makes three of us. My body woke me up because it was hungry at 5:30 AM. (I don't know either! Apparently I'm secretly five years old or something.) That was fun. :rolleyes:

At least we're not alone?

--RP

CaroPhoenix
12-25-2008, 05:06 PM
Dear CSers,

I'm sleepy too! My daughter thought 4:30 AM was a good time to start tap dancing in the middle of the bed. :cry: I convinced her to go back to her room and we eventually passed out for a few hours. Now my house is wrecked 'cos of all the stuff Child Rum got for Christmas.

Longing for a nap,
Rummy

crazylegs
12-25-2008, 06:26 PM
Dear Rummy,

The conservatory is quiet, warm and snuggly, you're more than welcome to use it to have a little nap or two! :)

Crazylegs

CaroPhoenix
12-25-2008, 09:43 PM
Dear Crazylegs,

Aaaah ... thank you! :)

:kiss:
Rummy

---------------------------------------------------------------
Dear Mr. Rum & Child Rum

Why are y'all still sleeping? It's now 5:30 PM ... y'all need to get up and help me cook dinner! Fortunately I made most of the side items beforehand.

She who can see into the future,
Rummy the Mummy

Misanthropical
12-26-2008, 01:29 AM
Dear little guy,

Daddy is wrong, Santa most certainly did write that note! I know cause I di..I mean I saw him do it! ;)

You see the carrots are gone, so he must have gave them to the reindeer, so that proves daddy is full of it!

Love and kisses!


Dear Daughter,

Stop eating all the whipped cream! I want at least half!

Smooches!


Dear Big Guy,

Could you please leave one cookie? That is all I ask.

Love and Smooches


Dear love of my life,

The House marathon proves God loves me more than he loves you, so deal! :p

Plus, God wanted to punish you for trying to tell the little guy there is no Santa!


Dear aunt,

You promised to send cookies, but now there are no cookies and you haven't responded to any emails, even the ones about the children, so what is going on?

I swear if you start talking with my mother again, I will cut you off from my family, just like I did all those years ago. It would be quicker if you just insult my husband like you did the first time I cut you off.

In our case blood is not thicker than water, love is. I will always stand up for him and will not tolerate anyone putting him down.

So you better have a damn good reason why I'm suddenly cut off from all communications or forgiveness will not be so forth coming as it was the first time.


To all those people I have sent Christmas cards to every year and not got one in response,

I started to write them out this year, but then I thought "you know what? FUCK THEM!" so no, I didn't send any out and just like every year, I didn't get any from those I usually send them to. So have a Crappy Christmas and Merry Go to Hell!


Dear BossMan,

I don't want to go to work tomorrow! I want to stay in my pj's and chill around the house with my family, just like I did today.

Bella_Vixen
12-26-2008, 05:23 AM
Dear Becks--

Please forgive me for the following.

*hugs and A Little Respect*



************************************************** ******




Dear Selfish Asshole soon-to-be-in-law-

Fine. You decided you *couldn't* make it right away today. As if Christmas is a brand new holiday that has never been celebrated before and you didn't know what day it was, which would cause you to sleep all fucking day, because you stayed up all damn night.

I will NEVER forgive you for just plain not coming over at ALL, not even for ½ an hour. Kevin came over and stayed for almost 3 hours. He NEVER comes over, much less stays for any length of time. As in, this has been the first time in over 10 years that he has been to my house.

And what I hope you burn in an especially fiery hell for is for not calling your fiancee at all! There is no damn excuse for that. You broke her heart. She may not tell you that, but you also shouldn't HAVE to be told.

Way to ruin yet another holiday.

I'd pray that you go back to NJ and stay there if I didn't know for a fact that Becks would go with you.

You are indescribably selfish.

iradney
12-26-2008, 09:07 AM
Dear Asshole in the above post
Dude
WRONG MOVE
NEVER fuck with a twin's emotions...like, EVER. Twin Death Glares can literally make you shrivel up and die.
Then again, maybe you deserve it, you didn't even call your FIANCE for Christmas?? Dang dude...moronic move there.

Rads

smileyeagle1021
12-26-2008, 09:38 AM
Dear Selfish Asshole,
Rads said it better than I could.

Dear bossman,
Why are you still here? Don't you have a wife and kids who would like to see you sometime before 2009?

Dear Mother,
Two planes in one week went off the end of the runway... and you wonder why I prefer to drive back to Reno... The storm is going to clear this weekend and it will be smooth sailing for me to drive back... hell, even if the storm continues, UDOT doesn't believe in plowing within Salt Lake county and I make it to and from work just fine... I'm sure I could handle the plowed :eek: roads of northern Nevada.

Dear invester,
Yes, I think he's creepy as hell.

Dear CS support group and cheer squad,
I've decided (assuming Azen can cover the shifts) that I will drive back to Reno on Monday, the come out of the closet to my mother on Tuesday... hopefully I will stay til Friday, if not the weather will be clear at least part of the day on wednesday if things go bad.

Dear bossman again,
you left for the airport at 3:05... it is now 3:40... did you crash?

Dear me,
Don't be a coward this time.

draftermatt
12-26-2008, 11:12 AM
Dear Cody,

You are a good dog, but good lord do you have bad gas. You're on the same food you've always been on, but the past few days you have been stinking me out of the house. Pew.

Dear Early Morning CSr's,

Up again at 5:30, though this time it was because my wife had to work today (I'm off till the 5th) and of course I can't fall back asleep without her in the bed. Anyone else up early and doesn't want to be?

I don't have to be anywhere till 10:30 when I get to go to my grandmother's to help my parents and my sister clean her house. My asshole uncle is coming down from Boston today, and is staying at her house even though she now lives in a Nursing home.

Oh well, at least it gets us boxing things up because we'll soon have to sell the house.

iradney
12-26-2008, 04:24 PM
Dear Smiley

You can do it! Totally pulling for you *HUGGLES*

Rads

MannersMakethMan
12-26-2008, 04:38 PM
Dear Smiley,

We all believe in you - you can do it!

MMM

Dear anyone unfortunate enough to be taking returns today,

You poor dears. I hope it hasn't been as bad as I remember it being. However, I suspect it'll only have been worse, so come and see me afterwards for a nice cup of tea (or stronger if you prefer). I only wish I could take a little pain off you brave souls.

Lots of positive thoughts,

MMM

RootedPhoenix
12-26-2008, 07:11 PM
Dear Smiley,

*HUGS* So many of us are pulling for you. Be safe getting there and back.

--RP

Dear people working today,

*offers hugs, cookies, tissues, cocoa, peppermint tea, chocolate, and comfort*

--RP

Dear CSers,

Hope your celebrations are going well and have gone well. Hope that you are safe and that you make it home again safe if you left home.

--RP

SengaKitty
12-26-2008, 10:48 PM
Dear CSers,
Know what the best song in the world for cheering oneself up with is.... Alvin and the Chipmunks singing "Bad Day"...
-Rhpg, listening to the Chipmunks "Bad Day" over and over after missing her son's first christmas...


Dear Smiley,
you know where to reach me love, and I believe in you :D :hugs:


Dear guy at the liqour-smoke shop,
you totally rock out loud for the free cherry vodka shooter :D it'll get used later tonight... guaranteed

Evil Queen
12-26-2008, 10:51 PM
Dear Smiley,

You better contact me when you get to Reno safely. If you don't, I'm going to be very very mean to you! RAWR!

-EQ.

smileyeagle1021
12-27-2008, 03:40 AM
Dear Smiley,

You better contact me when you get to Reno safely. If you don't, I'm going to be very very mean to you! RAWR!

-EQ.

dear board (mainly EQ sense she mentioned safety first)
I've postponed my trip for a week to avoid the worst weather (and if I wait a week there are flights I can afford :D )
Thank you for all your encouragement... hopefully this goes well.

Smiley

Evil Queen
12-28-2008, 04:04 PM
Dear Dear thread,

Behold! I can bring topics from the dead! Arise! Arise!

Feeling Goofy,
-EQ



Dear Lupo,
I haven't heard from you at all, are you okay? Did you kill The Twatpumpkin? When are you flying back? How was your X-mas? And if you didn't kill The Twatpumpkin, can I do it? :D

Miss my buddy,
-EQ

Dreamstalker
12-28-2008, 04:36 PM
Dear Ex:

I know you said you wanted to come visit, but this time is not going to work. You can't drive out here until late on the 2nd at least, I leave on the 5th. Too chaotic. I've sent you two emails letting you know why it won't work and it can't be made to work. Don't even think of getting snippy with me; it won't work because it won't work and I'm not rescheduling my flight (I can't do that anyway because of the fare restrictions) because I have people expecting me home when I originally said I would be home.

Dear Southwest Airlines ABQ Baggage Office:

Thank you for finding our suitcases in a reasonable timeframe; I was especially worried that my bag wouldn't get back to me before I left. But, pick up your phones kthx? We had to call the main 800 number and have them get you to call us to confirm that we would be picking it up. Receiving a voicemail "get in touch with us by the end of the day or your bags get shipped to Dallas" and then not being able to definitively contact you guys is a tad unnerving.

crazylegs
12-28-2008, 08:32 PM
'Dear' CPS.

You Suck.

You such so badly at your job I'm amazed you haven't been rebranded and reorganised by now.

DIAF

Crazylegs

Dear D

Quite frankly you're incredible. I know of no-one else who has the mental strength you have. You've been through more in 22 years than most people go through in their entire lives yet you battled through it and then did one of the hardest jobs in the country. You did that job incredibly well and made such a difference to so many people. I am in awe of what you have already acheived, let alone what you will do with the rest of your life.

Yours, respectfully

Crazylegs

RetailWorkhorse
12-28-2008, 11:52 PM
Dear Headache,

OW.

That is all.

-Daz Mel



Dear Life,

Hours cut, weather going to get NASTY, trying hard not to crack, medications gone, have to go to the doctor's tomorrow, need to discuss Bosco with my grandmother and Aunt (who is the main one that could hurt my whole plans in this little "dog-napping" I'm attempting to do), Artist's Block, no gas, internet connection bites, and a business to be started the first of June.

Currently, those are my worries.

2009 better have too much Rock for one hand.

-Looking forward to the New Year,
Daz Mel

Evil Queen
12-28-2008, 11:56 PM
Dear Mel,

*sniffles and points* You're online here.. but not on IM? Why? WHY?! :cry:

-EQ


Dear SO,

Honey, I'm lonely now. Come home please. Your parents can't keep you forever! :cry:
And by the way, until you come home, I'm keeping your sweater so :p

-EQ

RetailWorkhorse
12-29-2008, 12:13 AM
Dear Mel,

*sniffles and points* You're online here.. but not on IM? Why? WHY?! :cry:

-EQ

Dear EQ,

I am (LEGALLY!) downloading music and my music downloader thingy and my Pidgin doesn't get along. So I have to sacrifice one for the other.

I need music so I can have something to listen to while I do my artwork.

If I sit on AIM with you and run Azureus at the same time, we will get into a HUGE fight because Pidgin will kick me off every 10 minutes.

I am currently at 35% on both sets of downloads and I really wanted them done tonight as I have a piece of art I need to Title and I have no title for said piece of artwork.

Pages are not loading for me again.

Curses to the cell phone tower on <Mountain Range> for my shit-n-ass reception.

I hate this place.

-RW

iradney
12-29-2008, 09:53 AM
Dear TTO

I don't know if you're mad because I
a) Came home late last night
b) spent 7 hours chatting with a friend that I very rarely see
c) said friend is male
d) I was a little drunk when I came home
e) I haven't gone to gym because, well, I just don't feel like it

But seriously, the passive aggressive noise making to get me out of bed? Not impressed.

Rads

iradney
12-29-2008, 01:44 PM
Dear TTO
Just tell me if you're bored and want to go out :) Luckily my ESP was working!
Thank you for agreeing to come out with me to lunch!
Love you
Rads

Shangri-laschild
12-29-2008, 01:54 PM
Dear NRC,

There is a reason I didn't bolt when you thought I should have. There's a reason why I'm still here. It wasn't luck, it was you. Please stop forgetting that. Everything will be fine.

B


Dear W,

Thank you. You have this way of making me feel beautiful all over. Not beautiful despite the things I don't like about me. All over beautiful. You're an awesome friend and I had missed you more than I realized. Here's to hoping that we'll get to see each other more often now.

Becca

RetailWorkhorse
12-30-2008, 06:19 AM
Dear Sleeping Pills,

I want to go outside and PLAY. Kick in so I can get some SLEEP already!

I do NOT need to sleep the day away, I have to go to the Vet's so's I can get me some pills. DEAL WITH IT. I'm already fidgety without them.

NOW WORK DAMN YOU!

-A very much awake puppy-horse-thing

AdminAssistant
12-30-2008, 07:15 PM
Dear Professor,

No, I did not screw up. YOU screwed up. I sent you a triple-checked spreadsheet with all of my students' grades on it. YOU did not enter them all correctly. And I deeply, DEEPLY resent you e-mailing the student whose grade YOU screwed up and BLAMING ME. You've told us all of your technical and computer incompetence. I know you transposed a letter. Now I'm paranoid, wondering about all the other grades. Did somebody else get a wrong grade? I'm pissed, and I'm wishing I could have submitted them myself. That was one of my best students, and you got his grade wrong. And blamed me.

I AM PISSED.

Oh, and "sorry I forgot to tell you about the guy attending the thing for extra credit" long after I sent my grades in, while I'm at home and can't do anything about it? GAH. This is supposed to be my break. I should not be dealing with this shit.

You sir, suck.

~ Your very pissed GTA

the_std
12-30-2008, 11:12 PM
Dear The Boy,

... Can I please stop missing you now?

Me

RetailWorkhorse
12-31-2008, 07:04 AM
Dear Whomever Keeps Listening In On My Conversations To Dog,

Please excuse me, Friend of My Beloved, while I ramble for a few moments in space and time.

I got into an odd conversation with my Mother today as I sucked down some ice creme. I am a Diabetic. I am Type 2 and I control it with Diet. Our conversation consisted on the Musing that I do not react to the lactose (Milk Sugar) in such dairy products as Ice creme, yogurts, and cheese. I can eat all of those in large quantities and my Glucose levels will actually go down rather than up.

I rationalized it as the Milk Proteins keeping me safe from harm. My Mother is of a similar mind.

The only question is Why.

Do not get me wrong, I'm thankful that I can use dairy products to counter-balance the effects of ingesting sugar. I don't eat much of it, considering how much of a sick little person it makes me, so there's no real danger of going into a sugar-induced coma.

I do worry, however, about how if I eat some yogurt and cheese instead of meat proteins it drops my glucose levels to way below normal. Keeps me from just sucking down a quart of yogurt, anyhow. :\ I can't help it, I like yogurt.

Which, in itself, is odd. I didn't like yogurt until I hit 21. At least I still hate and despise Shrimp, so Scorpion's supply of the World's Shrimp is still in her favour.

Speaking of which, I do believe that Scorpion is still pissed off at me. haven't been able to get a hold of her, not that I tried very hard. I just don't want to be yelled at anymore. *Heavy sigh* I sent a link to a pictograph to her, but she hasn't said anything about it. I can only assume (as I am wont to do) that either she is really royally pissed at me or she just hasn't been able to get to her computer for a while.

I've noticed something about my artwork. It's starting to change. Nazen said it was "maturing" but the psychobutt couldn't tell me just how he felt it was maturing. Geeze. Maybe next time I'll ask an Art Critic. I didn't even realize it was starting to change until just recently. Granted, I still have my super messy 10-minute doodles that I keep posting, but that looks like it's starting to change as well. Not sure how I feel about that.

I have a slim chance to do illustration for a children's book with a friend of Scorpion's. I don't know what the story is about, so I'm hesitant to draw some mock-ups to see if it would work with the Wordcraft. I'd like to try being a full-blown Illustrator, though. Just to see what it would be like. Ya know. For fun. That kinda thing. Even if it didn't work out, I'd still have a mock-up book to show to my future Nieces, Nephews and Life Students.

Show them I'm not completely Worthless.

Today is New Years Eve. 2009 is about to start. I'm excited, because so much is going to happen this year. I think I'll pick up a pocket calendar to keep track of all the daily stuff like I used to.

So I'll raise a toast, to Art, to Life, and the Pursuit of Happiness I'm about to Start.

-A Devoted of Dog
Daz Mel

smileyeagle1021
12-31-2008, 01:42 PM
Dear Coworker,
Where are you?
Could you please be here
That is all

Smiley

Dreamstalker
12-31-2008, 03:17 PM
Dear Ex:

If you are thinking of showing up here at random (which was/is not going to work for many reasons all of which you know), both I and papa bear will be Annoyed. So don't do it, I'd love to start 2009 not pissed off at you (or anyone really).

Dear Unemployment Office:

Why don't you guys have a branch in metro Boston? I can't get out to Newton every week.

Misanthropical
12-31-2008, 05:46 PM
Dear Big Slobbering Dog in the Sky, (Yes, I stole it from RetailWorkhorse)

Thank you for making so that my husband no longer has to go into his second job.


Dear Ubber Christian who sits next to me,

I heard you were moving to another area. I saw you go in the break room, dump everything out of a big box on to the floor and take the box over to your desk, so you can put all the stuff on your desk into to move. I'm not shocked. I wanted to offer to help you move, but I knew you would whine to someone about how mean I am, even though I have nothing on you.

I found out the reason you don't like me is because I smoke. THE WORST SIN IN THE BIBLE! Oh, wait, no it isn't, it's not ever mentioned in the Bible. You tried to guilt me by saying you have asthma and the smell of smoke on my coat when I come in sets it off, which I would have taken into consideration if you weren't totally full of shit.

I know you are full of shit, since you never pick up your inhaler after I come in, which you keep on your desk for show. I have seen you use it and you don't even use it correctly, which once again shows me you are full of shit. You see, I use one too. One that is a lot stronger than yours, which I didn't tell you about, since you would think I use it for smoking, which is NOT the case and my doctor can back me up. I keep it my purse and not on my desk for everyone to see.

Also, the inhaler you use has not been on the market for almost two years, they were all pulled and replaced. Once again, showing you do not have asthma, you just want people to feel sorry for you and do what you want them to do.

I have seen you throw epic fits when people do not do what you want. It's disgusting to see a middle aged woman throw a fit like a two year old to try to get her way.

My friend and I are hoping you have to sit next to a two pack a day smoker with a bad attitude.

smileyeagle1021
12-31-2008, 06:17 PM
I found out the reason you don't like me is because I smoke. THE WORST SIN IN THE BIBLE! Oh, wait, no it isn't, it's not ever mentioned in the Bible.

Dear Mis,
But it is mentioned in the LDS Doctrine and Covenants ;)

Dear Mom,
Damnit... you had to move your rad therapy up a week... didn't you... so now I have to give you that letter at the beginning of my visit rather than near the end... so now if this goes ugly I'll be stuck there for nearly a week of ugly rather than only a day or two of ugly... so please, don't let it go ugly please.

Dear CS,
I could use your love... also, I posted a copy of the rough draft of the letter I'm planning on giving my mother in the "my hands are shaking now' thread... if you could be so kind as to give me feedback. THank you

Smiley

Evil Queen
12-31-2008, 10:13 PM
Dear Daz Mel,

I'm sorry I was mean to you. I'm sorry I couldn't get to tell you sooner, I've been working a lot.

RetailWorkhorse
01-01-2009, 02:48 AM
Dear Queenie of Evil,

That's okay, I figured it was either one of two things so we'd get over it eventually.

By the by, how's work?

-Your Little Bro

RetailWorkhorse
01-01-2009, 07:04 AM
Dear Desk,

*ah-CHOO!*
*Slams head on Desk from force of sneeze*

FUCK OW!

In pain,
Daz Mel

**P.S: Er....sorry, Desk. :sweatdrop:

RootedPhoenix
01-01-2009, 09:09 AM
Dear Nose,

You have my permission to STOP FLIPPING OUT ALREADY.

Thanks,
Me

CaroPhoenix
01-01-2009, 01:54 PM
Dear Mr. Rum,

"Thank you" for letting me know the reason you took this mini-vacation was not to spend quality time with me or Child Rum, but to clean house. Next time, don't do us any favors. You want to take a vacation from work to clean, let me know so Child Rum & I can be out of the house, enjoying ourselves. I hurt. I have a bum elbow, knee, & back. The cold doesn't help. You might have have as many aches & pains as I do, but it doesn't mean that I'm making them up. :mad:

Go "F" yourself,
Mrs. Rum

iradney
01-01-2009, 04:12 PM
Dear Mr Rum

Do you have any idea how many men would kill with their bare hands to get someone as wonderful as IDR in their lives? She's beautiful, funny, geeky and a wonderful mother.
And yet you treat her like yesterday's newspaper. You suck rotten squid liquid *grrr*

Rads

Dear IDR

*SQUISHIES*

Love
rads

RootedPhoenix
01-01-2009, 07:50 PM
Dear Mr Rum,

You are now (if you weren't already) on my nastypeople list. :mad: You be nice to her and your child.

--RP

Dear IDaR,

*hugs and comfort*

--RP

Dear migraine,

DIAF.

--Me.

CaroPhoenix
01-01-2009, 07:59 PM
Dear Rads & RP,

Thank you! :)

At least I got a 1.5 hour nap this afternoon. I have no clue why, but my body felt like it got slammed with the sleepy stick & sleepy wall all at the same time! :eek:

I'm taking it easy for the rest of the night. If Mr. Rum says anything, I'm going to give him my death glare. Now I'm going to have to figure out how to fold left handed. :lol:

Getting a little happier,
Rummy

RootedPhoenix
01-01-2009, 11:40 PM
Dear roommate,

You have just sailed up my happy list. :D :D Dead cold in 3..2..1..

--Me

Evil Queen
01-02-2009, 12:03 AM
Dear Mr Rum,

I know where you sleep. :devil:

-The Evil One

CaroPhoenix
01-02-2009, 01:50 AM
Dear EQ,

I looked like this when I read your little note above: :spew:

Also, you have a PM from me. :D

Rummy

smileyeagle1021
01-02-2009, 03:35 AM
Dear Mr Rum,

I know where you sleep. :devil:

-The Evil One

Dear EQ, if you need help, one of the advantages of having an Italian ex, I still have mob enforcers on speed dial :D

OK, so no mob enforcers :(
but one vicious little bitch who would make Mr. Rum think twice about being a douche ;)

Evil Queen
01-02-2009, 02:49 PM
Dear Smiley,

One of the perks about having a family primarily from Southern Florida for so many generations, you become "tight" with the Cuban Mafia. Particularly if the old don still think's your mother is a "Cute Kid".

But hey, Mr Rum is just being mean. Mob Rule doesn't apply, but MY Rules do. :devil:

Loaded,
-EQ

persephone
01-03-2009, 12:48 AM
Dear Hubby,

I am with you in whatever it is you decide and, though you've asked Boss for a week to think about it, I think I know your decision. I know this is what you want more than anything else and I will support you and go with you and do everything I can to make the transition easy.

However, there may be times I get a little emotional in the next few months. Not only am I leaving a place I love, I'll be much further away from my family than I've ever been (as will you) and I will be slightly stressed out. On top of that, if you hadn't realized, I'm pregnant. :p So yeah, might be a little emotional.

But it's okay. Cause I still love you! :D

Love,

your Wifey

Misanthropical
01-03-2009, 04:45 AM
Dear Love of my life,

Thank you for going with me this morning to my pain specialist's appt. I like it better when you are there.

Thank you for taking us to get hair cuts. You and the little guy needed them the most. My daughter and I didn't need nearly as much as you two did.

Our little guy had the cutest little boy hair cut EVER, but he deicided he didn't like it and had it all buzzed off. Damn! I really liked that haircut. Oh well. Maybe next time he will stick to it.

Our daughter looked wonderful after having her hair cut in layers. I don't like layers in my hair, so I got a straight cut without any layers. Yes, it is really short, but even you, my love, had to admit it looks really nice on me.


Dear Hot Pain Specialist Doctor,

You so rock out loud! You didn't do the injections today, but are going try a different injection in a couple of weeks. You also had no problem giving me Vicodin in case the pain flares up before I see you at the injection appointment.

Thank you so much for not having a problem giving me strong pain medication. I like the fact that you ask me if I want to try different things and didn't demand that I do as you say or I can just suffer.

I have never once seen a look on your face that said to me "I'm keeping this bitch in pain unless she does what I want and when I want it" The only look I have seen is the one that tells me that you do not ever want to see me in pain. I like that in a doctor.

So, once again, YOU ROCK OUT LOUD!

draftermatt
01-03-2009, 11:59 AM
Dear Grandma,

Why in the world did you save all that stuff?

The saddest thing is we're finding junk from the 60's-70's which means it wasn't just you hoarding this stuff, but Grandpa too!

After 1 day the dumpster is 1/3 full and that's only from the kitchen, den, living room, bedrooms! We still have the basement to go through! And it's packed with crap!

Dear Future Brother in Law,

I like you, we get along great, and I think of you as a friend. You have helped my sister and I have a better friendship/relationship, and for that I thank-you.

That said, get yourself a job and sell the goddamn cars! Stop relying on my sister!

I know the economy is bad, and that's why you lost your job, I can sympathize, and I understand. But you are living rent free in my grandmother's house, and now that she's in the Nursing home that's temporary. Could be months/years, who knows. But if she doesn't die, then we have to sell the house to pay for her care.

Let's start with the cars. You drive the Dodge, bought it after the 88 Ford went kaput, but explain to me why the 88 Ford is still in my grandmother's garage. You haven't even put an ad up trying to sell it yet! I know it "doesn't cost me anything to sit" but when you have no money, it's time Jack.

Same goes with the 79 Ford, and the Monte Carlo. They're sitting doing nothing, time for them to go!

I understand you wish you hadn't sold the Mustang to my Dad, but you're the one who asked my sister to marry him, and you had to have known that was going to mean getting a house/apartment. So that means you have to sell the toys, and get rid of the debt.

Hell I never had the toys, I wanted the house and got it at 19! Now I'm on my 2nd house and I'm 24!

Look, I'm very protective of my sister, and I don't want to see her hurt. Since the wedding plans are still progressing I assume you still want to marry her. So please, work this stuff out on your own before I have to have a chat with you. I really don't want to do that.

RayvenQ
01-03-2009, 07:09 PM
Dear rat,

I don't know where you are now, except that you aren't here, I can only hope that wherever you are you're happy.

edible_hat
01-03-2009, 10:43 PM
Dear Blizzard,

If I wanted to spend half my time trying to run away from a gang that will inevitably catch me and beat me up anyway, I'd go back to high school. Games are supposed to be fun.

CaroPhoenix
01-03-2009, 10:46 PM
Dear Sleepy Stick,

Stop whacking me!

Ouchies!
Rummy

----------------------------------------------
Dear Back,

Why did you have to twist really painfully and then seize up? At least the Aleve was nice to me.

Cryng,
Rummy

----------------------------------------------
Dear Jimmy,

You flatter me. I know you're only half-joking.

And in response to your question: I don't think Mr. Rum would notice at all. (Though he might be wondering why I'm in a better mood more often).

;)
Rummy

------------------------------------------------------------
Dear Mr. Rum,

Thank you for 'letting' me take a nap this afternoon. Especially after I had to wrestle Child Rum into the bed to take a nap with me. :rolleyes: Because you can't watch her while I'm out cold from the Aleve? And besides, even if you had 'vetoed' the whole I need a nap thing? It wouldn't have stuck because you know Aleve makes me tired.

Again, I have aches and pains that you don't have. You've been heavier than me for a longer time than I have been heavier. I know I need to lose weight, but bear with me, okay? I'm finding new aches and pains everyday and I think it's from all this weight.

Now, go away and do something useful and don't expect me to be at your beck and call because you don't know how to fold laundry.

I wish your mother trained you better,
Mrs. Rum

RootedPhoenix
01-04-2009, 01:53 AM
Mr. Rum,
:salmon:

--RP

Dear body,

AAUUUGGHHHH.

At least there's some icky things you're not doing? :D :cry:

--Me

CaroPhoenix
01-04-2009, 02:14 AM
Dear RP,

I couldn't have said it better than that. :D

As for your body, I hope it straightens itself out soon! I'd hate to have to do this: :salmon: to you. :angel:

Rummy

AdminAssistant
01-04-2009, 04:01 AM
BoyThing,

:cry:

I came back up here so that we could spend some time together - so that I could see if this could really work. First you cancel last night and tonight? Yes, my eyes were red and itchy, a combo of the cat and the fact that you SMOKE. And sitting over in your chair sucking a cigarette instead of cuddling with me isn't helping either. When you suggested 'getting out of here', I thought you were suggesting a change of venue. Silly me, to think that you would actually want to hang out at my place. When you dropped me off, yes, I was pissed. I put a lot of work into making myself pretty - for YOU. I wear really uncomfortable underthings for YOU. And if YOU don't start putting some effort into this...I just don't know. I like you, I do, but sometimes it feels like you don't give two shits about me. And that....apathy....hurts far more than anything else.

And I do understand that you're tired because you've been working a lot. But I was feeling damn sexy and you're too exhausted? Seriously? I just can't do this much longer. And the thing that kills me the most is that I could be at home with my family right now, and instead I'm up here all alone, because I am, apparently, an idiot.

~ The GirlThing

Evil Queen
01-04-2009, 04:09 AM
Dear Admin,

Would you like for me to give BoyThing a little visit? :devil:

-The one with the Bull whip.

RootedPhoenix
01-04-2009, 04:28 AM
Admin,

Sorry BoyThing is being twerpy. *offers chocolate*

--RP

Dreamstalker
01-04-2009, 04:15 PM
Dear Ex:

OK...at least I know you're not going to show up here (no offense, but I'm glad for that), but what's with insinuating that I need to plan better?! Don't even start with that. You knew on December 15th when I was leaving NM (January 5th, tomorrow, I didn't get your email until just now). I knew you were in MI until the 2nd. I also had some inkling of weather conditions so theorized that if you didn't get stuck there due to snow, driving from TX to NM may not be feasible in the crapbox you drive (your car is not fit for this altitude, which may also cause problems). I told you on December 30th that this would not work, and why (too chaotic among other things).

No offense, but I don't really like your neck of the woods. I also plan to really step up the job hunt/cert race, so my coming out there in the future is unlikely.

Dear mom:

...Thanks for the revelation that the trust left by my grandfather (which my dad as original custodian did not want touching the stock market, when I gained ownership I didn't want it in the market either) has lost a good chunk of its value thanks to its being put in some sort of investment account as you deemed necessary. I have a right to know what's going on with the money that I have a right to access if needed.

AdminAssistant
01-04-2009, 05:00 PM
Dear EQ,

Um, could I borrow that?

:devil:

RP,

Oooh, chocolate. om nom nom

I didn't have any ice cream last night, which really really sucks.

Thanks, guys.

RootedPhoenix
01-05-2009, 07:48 PM
Dear congestion-driven thing,

I've sort of gotten attached to breathing. GO AWAY. kthx.

--Me.

Megg
01-06-2009, 03:11 AM
Dear residents of Idaho (or anyone who may want to move to Idaho),

Please please please buy our house! We have it listed at a ridiculously low price ($35,000 less than it appraised at) and will sell it to just about anyone! It's beautiful, a wonderful home, and you will love it! I love it, it just happens to be in this frigid wasteland that I hate.

So please, help me get out of this arctic tundra! I cannot stand the cold for much longer!

Love,

Megg

Evil Queen
01-06-2009, 03:39 AM
Dear Megg,

The following stats are required: bed/bath, sq footage, and current asking price.

-The person looking for a house in NM.

Irving Patrick Freleigh
01-06-2009, 04:00 AM
Dear Ohio State Buckeyes Football Team:

Thanks once again for fucking it up for the rest of us.

Signed,
The Big Ten Eleven

RetailWorkhorse
01-06-2009, 07:12 AM
Dear Fuzzy Slobbering Dog in the Sky,

It's 3 am, it's raining, and I'm sitting in my underwear wrapped up in a blanket waiting for Flea-Bit to wake up so I can ask him a question before he goes to work.

It's the 6th day of the New Year and I'm pretty thankful for the good days. The Weather's okay, if a bit damp, and I'm not freezing my ass off. These are good things.

But my hours at work have been cut in half. Mom's hours are slashed as well. I know I don't have any bills save for my Warehouse and gasoline, but I really don't want to be stretched thin before my Inheritance check goes through.

And you can bet your feathery whiskers I'll have that sucker cashed before I leave this idiotic state.

Dad is going to have me work the Gem show with him this year as a Go-fer and Resupply Train. Please let that weekend be warm and dry. I'd like to have a whole lotta fun there before I leave. I've never been to a Dealer's Show before and I'd really like the opportunity to do so.

By the by, have I ever thanked you for my skills in art? No? Well, thank you, Dog. It whiles away the time perfectly.

-Your Devoted.

smileyeagle1021
01-06-2009, 03:44 PM
Dear Apollo,
stop trying to steal my glasses... especially while I'm wearing them

sincerely,
your cat whisperer

PhotoChick
01-06-2009, 03:59 PM
Dear childen,
what smiley said. And stop being sick and cranky, I'm tired of the pushing and the crushing fingers and the busted chin. STOP. NOW.

Your tired mother

P.S. Stop acting like ravenous beasts at dinner, your grandma must think I don't feed you.

lastofthesummerwine
01-06-2009, 04:03 PM
(or anyone who may want to move to Idaho)


I sincerely wish I could help. I have long wanted to move out that way but it's just not in my poverty-stricken cards. I will keep good thoughts in mind; maybe that'll be worth something within this grand cosmos we inhabit.

iradney
01-06-2009, 06:41 PM
Dear TBS

Yay, you're back from leave. I'm glad to see you're taking looking for your OWN place as seriously as I am. Now, if you could just get your OWN goddam postbox - you moved out of our place over a year ago, and haven't changed your address with your mobile provider and bank. I just throw it away, since we used to keep it for you, ask you to pick it up and you never did.

I'll give you till end of February this year. Then, I'm just going to start returning to senders your mail. I mean, hell, I know for a FACT you can change your address with the mobile people over the internet. Honestly.

Love
Rads

smileyeagle1021
01-06-2009, 06:50 PM
Dear Apollo,
Does my hair taste good? You seem to be licking it a lot. You really shouldn't get too addicted to the taste of hair... mother doesn't have any and I don't visit that often. Have I mentioned that you are a little demon cat, because you are. What have I gotten myself into volunteering to be your cat whisperer?

sincerely,
smiley

worddork
01-06-2009, 07:25 PM
Dear politicians in the state legislature ,

Please get your act together. The lot of you were elected to make sure we would have a balanced budget on time. You have failed. I repete, you have FAILED. It is now 6 months late. Brav-fucking-o. You have surpassed the old record for a late budget set in 2002, which was, ironicly, set by your predecessors.

Thanks to your inability to work with members of the opposing party, I'm sitting on my duff waiting for work. Since the schools won't be seeing any more money until you work out a budget, they aren't have any staff development meetings, which means they don't need any subs to cover for the teachers at the meetings. Which means I am not working.

You claim that you don't want to make any cuts to education or health care. All well and good so let's look else where. How about all that money going to island in the middle of every street, do we really need them. Hell NO! They force drivers to make un-needed u-turns to reach their destinations. Some of the places to make these u-turns are unsafe, while the area where they used to make left truns into whatever street it is they needed, where much safer.

I know let's take a look at the money set aside for your paid. Sicne you haven't done your job in the last 6 months we should be paid for those 6 months. I know if If and anyone else on this board were to not work for 6 months we sure as hell wouldn't be getting a pay check. So there's a shit load of money that can go into the budget.

So, do the State a favor and grow the fuck up. Stop acting like a 5 year old who hasn't gotten their way and takes their toy home so the other kids can't play with it. Wait I take that back, it was unfair to 5 year olds everywhere, they at least make up the next day on don't hold grudges.

So, kindly get your shit together, get a budget signed, so I can get some subbing jobs lined up, cause looking at an empty calendar is just depressing.

Sincerely,
Worddork

P.S. get to work, ya fuckers

gunsage
01-07-2009, 09:35 PM
Dear thief,

Hi! You may not know me, but your days are numbered. You see, I've worked here for almost two years and before that LOTS of security. You might have assumed that it was a brilliant idea to steal my food from the freezer. You were wrong. In fact, you were so wrong that you couldn't even make it look like an accident as my food was the ONLY food by the particular brand in there. I have an $8 Chinese food bill here with your name on it.

Nevermind that I've barely been eating so I can keep up with my resolution of losing weight, YOU felt it was a good idea to sap one of the VERY FEW food sources I still chose: a goddamn'd health food frozen dinner. Nice. I'm sure it wasn't tasty and if it was, I hope you were allergic and die soon. Painfully. And slowly.

Yours hungrily,



Gun Sage

P.S. You'd better HOPE painfully and slowly, because you don't want to know what will happen if I find you.

Lady Legira
01-07-2009, 11:07 PM
Dear Cyst

Thank you for not being what I thought you might be but not thank you for being the size of a cricket ball and a Dermoid cyst instead. Ick. :cry: Still not sure how I feel about you or the fact my sister might have one for being my twin.

Oh and thank you very much for adding to the ever growing collection of scars that trace my body from various ops and procedures done. :rolleyes:

Yours without love

Your host

Becks
01-08-2009, 03:10 AM
Dear head,

Stop hurting.

Please?

Miserable,

me

the_std
01-08-2009, 03:13 AM
Dear Face,

I don't know why you think it's acceptable to contract impetigo, but it's not! A mass of open, pus-y sores is not conducive to a productive lifestyle. Oh, and on top of all of that, you're really farking contagious, so I've been quarantined! Three days off of my next paycheque already. You're not making any friends here.

Grr,
Me

Evil Queen
01-08-2009, 03:22 AM
Dear World,

Be nice to my friend Lupo or I go Psycho on the world's collective asses.

Slightly Irked,
-EQ

Misanthropical
01-08-2009, 04:44 AM
Dear Whiner,

Stop annoying the hell out of me before I beat the stupid out of you! I am sick of your shit. SHUT UP AND DO YOUR DAMN JOB! GRRR!


Dear Redneck,

If you don't stop yelling and whining about how everyone is so stupid and don't know how to do their job, I swear I will duct tape your entire head! Don't test me!


Dear BossMan,

Yes, I do have to have minor surgery done for chronic acute pain. It's not funny to tell me to "man up" Trust me, you have no idea the pain I get. Just let me have the time off without the not funny remarks, mmkay? You could not handle what I would say is minor pain, let alone the horrendous pain I get.

SorryIsGoodEnough
01-08-2009, 08:36 AM
Dear George Strait,

I love you. You make me happy. How can you be so handsome!? It's painful almost. You are the perfect specimen.

Fan-tastically yours,
Me.

Dear Garth Brooks,

Do that eyebrow thing you do in the video for Standing Outside the Fire. It's hot.

You're hot.

Lovingly,
Me.


Dear Me,
What's up with the country kick lately? : /

-Me.

draftermatt
01-08-2009, 03:52 PM
Dear Hands,

I washed you, why do you still smell like that rubberband I just had to use.

Dear World,

When will we ever come up with some non-latex based bands? The smell makes my head feel funny at times.

Dear L,

What the hell are you doing back here? You quit, you made it out! I'm so dissapointed.

Dreamstalker
01-08-2009, 11:35 PM
Dear Ex:

I 'need to plan better'?! Please. Oddly, you not showing up in NM is not as disappointing as you believe. I was actually able to get important stuff done.

You don't get my cell number again, as you have proven conclusively that not flooding it is impossible. That number is on my resume and I need the line open kthx.

Stop sending me unsolicited badly-made homebrew porn, as I've told you about eight times. Remember when I told you your ISP and cell provider don't look too favorably on that kind of thing? Well, they don't. Next questionable photo to hit my inbox gets the originating account reported.

Lioness Blackfire
01-09-2009, 01:15 AM
Dear Dad,

CHILL OUT
I know the primary drive in the computer needed to be replaced alluva sudden, right after we put in the kickass new video card, but if you do not CHILL a little, you're going to mess something up AGAIN. You already almost broke the system disc.
CHILL OUT

Love,
Your daughter

---

Dear Kickass New Video Card,

PLEASE don't have had anything to do with the drive failing alluva sudden. PLEASE. You are teh sex.
(And you look like a giant matchbox car! :D )

Love,
The Female Dwarven Rogue

---

Dear Pixie-Sprite-Fairy-Bunny-Spirit Things, Specifically The Ones That Inhabit My Dad's Room,

I LOVE YOU FOREVER
(told you so!)

LOVE,
The Girl Who Was Looking For The Basic Keyboard That Doesn't Need Special Drivers

---

Dear Lil' Bro,

THANK YOU for dealing with Dad whilst he was "being rowdy with the cables".

Love,
Big Sis

---

Dear New Hard Drive,

Please work. Please? Pleeeeeease?
And please don't break anything. Please? Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease?

Love,
Someone Who Would Have Been Much Gentler With Your Cables

AdminAssistant
01-09-2009, 03:48 AM
Dear Hot Gal Pal,

Thank you thank you thank you for meeting me for lunch, I sooo needed somebody to talk to and dish with - I've been so bored! Blah. And thanks for the kick in the pants. I know what I need to do, but I don't want to. *sigh*

BoyThing,

I'm not calling you. I'm not texting you. This is called 'the silent treatment'. When you call me this weekend, as you will, IF I answer my phone it will be to tell you to f*ck off.

Not that you would care. I've never met anyone more apathetic - especially a guy when it comes to someone he has sex with. I mean, seriously? wtf...

CaroPhoenix
01-09-2009, 09:58 PM
Dear Tummy.

Stop growling! Mr. Rum will be home with food shortly.

Hungrily,
Rummy

-------------------------------------
Dear Child Rum,

Stop being naughty! You need to sit down and do something not run around and get into my laundry room. You'll get lost in it.

:D
Mommy

---------------------------------------
Dear Mr. Rum,

Hurry up already! I iz hongry!

Your loving wife,
Mrs. Rum

----------------------------------------
Dear knees, hands, & elbows,

I'm sorry that I literally fell flat on my face yesterday morning really scraping the heck out of my knees & hands. However, why are both of my elbows giving me such pain I can barely bend them, let alone reach for stuff (even if it's in the silverware drawer) without lots of pain?

Hurty,
Rummy

RetailWorkhorse
01-10-2009, 03:44 AM
Dear Body,

What the heck is with the amount of water I've been drinking lately? Stop that! I can't need that much water, it's Winter and I don't sweat during winter!

Drowning in the gallons of water,
RW

Bella_Vixen
01-10-2009, 03:52 AM
Dear Becks--

METALLICA
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Becks
01-10-2009, 04:01 AM
Dear Lizziebeff,

Is it Monday yet? Is it Monday yet?

And I wanna go bowling!!!!!! Is it Sunday yet?

Love,

your favoritist sister EVER

Bella_Vixen
01-10-2009, 04:03 AM
Dear Becks--

In parts of the world, it's *almost* Sunday.

Does that count?

--Me

smileyeagle1021
01-10-2009, 06:36 AM
Dear cute guy who sat in front of me for the last 3 semesters,
Please sit in front of me again in at least one class this semester :D
BTW, have I mentioned I thought you were cute ;)
Now if only you could make my life by telling me you were gay and were into me too (but that may be too much to ask for)

sincerely,
the guy who has had a crush on you for 2 years now
Smiley

RetailWorkhorse
01-10-2009, 08:00 AM
Dear Fuzzy Slobbering Dog In The Sky,

Yes, it's me again. :rolleyes: Pretty sure you're getting sick of hearing me whine, but I have 109 days until my new life starts. You're going to be hearing from me a lot, considering how much stress I'm about to go through.

Dog....you travel, don't you? I do. I will. A lot. And I have some concerns.

I have my Tablet, and my computer, my Pirate Gold, my Naruto Plushie, and my ton and a half of books. So long as I have those, I'll be fine.

I'm leaving Store Retail, Dog. No one else I know, aside from Mum and Dad, is going to be doing what I'm about to do. I know already that my Grandsire is going to be very angry with my lifestyle. It's an Alternate Lifestyle. Different. Beyond the Norm.

Screw Normality.

But, Dog, much of the people I know are going to reject me. Their Alternative Lifestyle doesn't take into account living full-time in an RV. Their idea of "Alternative Lifestyle" is a bedmate that is their same gender.

Alan's okay with it, but only so long as I go up to Canada to see him. My Brother wants to move to another country entirely. Sister is land-bound to a Sticks and Bricks.

I'm scared, Dog. I've been rejected before. I can handle that. I've handled that a thousand times over (Remember the nightmare with Tay? Yeah, I thought you might).

But...I don't want to be alone. I mean, sure, I have Mr. Squirrel if I stop taking my pills, but I don't think a malicious entity is a good thing for someone who doesn't have access to mental facilities.

I'll have my Sister still, but she won't know first hand what I'm going through when it all happens. I'd always let her do something first, then took her lead in what not to do. Well, this time I can't follow in Sister's footstomps.

This time it's my turn to blaze a trail. In a weird way, I'm excited to do my own thing. But on the other hand, that makes me really something nervous. I'm not the kind of person that will take the lead. I'm more the all drive and no direction type. :lol:

I'm traveling with Mum and Dad for the first year or so. So if I get into a bind I'll have help. But who am I going to have breakfast with in the morning and talk about various tips and tricks when they're in Utah and I'm tooling around Alabama? I'm not comfortable having a roommate, let alone someone sharing my RV. That's a lot smaller space, ya know.

For some reason, all this stuff likes to hit me in the middle of the night when everyone I know is sleeping and I can't talk to them. None of them know what's like to RV anyhow, so I guess it doesn't much matter.

I've been reading RVing forums, but for some reason I just can't get into them. Probably the lack of "Read First Unread Post" button. :o I've been spoiled thanks to this site. I have the feeling that this is going to be one of those jumping-in-feet-first dealios.

And now I've made myself sick with worry. Royal fucking hell. And I've got work at 1pm today! Dammit. I worked myself up again. Well, at least my artwork isn't suffering....why does it seem like I can only do artwork at night? That totally messes me up sleep wise. At least it's still pretty.

Okay, I'm tired of typing. I'll update ya on my inability to handle things later.

smileyeagle1021
01-10-2009, 08:57 AM
Dear SLCC website
Thank you for crushing my hopes before the first week of class. I appreciate you providing student lists for all classes as early as the weekend before. Now I know for certain the cute guy doesn't have any classes with me :cry:
though on the bright side... it looks like I will be sharing a class with a Mr. Daniel Craig :bounce:

Bella_Vixen
01-12-2009, 05:31 AM
Dear Becks--

Thanks for making me go.

It was great fun!

--Me

*************************************

Dear thumb--

Stop being swollen!

--me

*************************************

Dear Becks (again)--

MetallicA!!!!!!!!!!!!

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

--headbanging me

RootedPhoenix
01-12-2009, 07:45 AM
Dear CSers,

Happy Sunday! *offers herbal tea, baked goods, and chocolate to everyone*

Thanks for being awesome. :D

--RP

Dear Internet,

Holy monkeys! of fire!, do you ever have an enormous assortment of herbal teas out there! I <3 you for it.

--RP

iradney
01-12-2009, 12:18 PM
Dear BFF's husband

You are an idiot. Her mom is going through a cancer scare, and you throw a shit fit because you made an incorrect assumption? You suck. Do that again, and I will beat your obese ass.

No Love
Rads

Dear BFF's Mom's Doctor

I hope that rats crawl up your anus and eat you from the inside out, saving the vital organs for last so that you can die in slow, horrible agony. You should be stripped of your license and your flesh.

DIAF is too good for you
Rads

smileyeagle1021
01-12-2009, 12:49 PM
Dear Rads,

RHPG has a whip... you might want to borrow it :lol:

Dear Rad's BFF's husband,

you piss off Rads and you piss us all off... prepare to die :devil:

Dear new guy at work,

you are promising, you may get the CS invitation later this week :D

Evil Queen
01-12-2009, 02:47 PM
Dear Smiley,

You may want to hold off on that invation until you know you can stand the guy.
-EQ

Dear Work,
WHY Did you promise me 40 hours when you hired me?! WHY?! This week I have 22!! FUCKING 22!! DIAF!!

-EQ

crazylegs
01-12-2009, 07:24 PM
Dear T

It was awfully sweet of you to introduce me to people, but you did it in a way as if they should know who I am, their slight confusion was worth it though! :lol: You are however correct, we should meet for coffee again, it has been too long! :)

Crazylegs

RetailWorkhorse
01-13-2009, 03:05 AM
Dear Cellphone Tower,

I know the weather's been rainy and freezy. I know you somehow got all mixed up and now I rarely have service.

Thank you for working tonight.

But I'm still not going to try any downloads when SEARCHING FOR SERVICE is just a small bump away.

Trying REALLY HARD not to pitch a bitch,
RW

Dear Mom,

....you think I draw well? Really? Thanks, Mom. It's appreciated.

Still don't know how I feel about it, though.

-Your Son

Dear EQ,

Use the newest pic (http://darksilverblade.deviantart.com/art/Evil-Queen-of-CS-109317261) for an avatar if you like.

-Your Little Bro

PS: It just now occurred to me I forgot your crown. DAMN!

Evil Queen
01-13-2009, 04:56 AM
Dear RW,

I LOVE IT! *fangirl squeal!* Faving it now! :love:

MUCH Admiration, because I can't draw worth crap,
-Your Big Sis

RetailWorkhorse
01-13-2009, 05:07 AM
Dear EQ,

You love just about everything I draw.

ZOMFG CONSPIRACY!!!!

-Needs sleep but also needs to finish cleaning the cabin before D-Day (Ditching-Dodge-Day),
RW

monolayth
01-13-2009, 06:38 PM
not so dear virus,

I have had you off and on for the past 10 days. Could you Please go away now? I seriously have not felt this bad in a very long time. If I still feel this bad tommrrow its tot he Dr with you. I don't understand everyone else had it for a week or less. Why so long with me?

Sick of you,
mono.

Lace Neil Singer
01-13-2009, 08:01 PM
Dear Stupid Man,

The fact that you are driving a huge car does not mean you automatically have the right of way every single time. I do not like having to slam my brakes on a wet road just cuz of this erroneous belief. Please go home and reread your Highway Code. Oh, and driving a giant car just makes me think you are sadly lacking in the trouser department, and probably everyone else thinks this, too.

Flipping you off,
Lace

Becks
01-13-2009, 10:31 PM
Dear Lizziebeff and Patty Moo,

I'm glad you guys had fun seeing MetallicA with me.

Words can't express how awesome it was!!!!!!!

Love,

your favoritist sister EVER

Lioness Blackfire
01-14-2009, 12:12 AM
Dear Life,

A little less suck would be appreciated.

kthxbai
Lioness

EDIT:
Dear Life,

What did I JUST tell you?!

Seriously,
Lioness

Bella_Vixen
01-14-2009, 03:20 AM
Dear Becks--

We MUST do that again sometime!

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!!

--me

***********************************

Dear Becks (again)--

Thanks for the shirt! I love it!!!

--me again

***********************************

Dear MetallicA--

You were awesome!

Maybe someday I'll have enough money to get to see you in different places around the country...or maybe just around WI like I did in 2004. Let's plan on that for the next tour, shall we?

--Metallihead me

***********************************

Dear Patty Moo--

Thanks for driving.

There is NO way I could have driven this morning. I owe you something nice.

--me

*************************************

Becks
01-14-2009, 04:36 AM
Dear Lizziebeff,

You're welcome.

However, I think next time YOU'LL be in charge of getting the shirts. :lol:

Already planning for next time,

Becks

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~

Dear MetallicA,

As always, too kick as for words.

Counting down the days until the as-yet-unknown next time,

the only person who'd go to see you guys in a Winnie-the-Pooh hoodie

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dear Jester,

Please feel free to laugh when you see what I write next.

--me

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dear Wisconsin winter,

:wtf: -12°????????????????????

There's a reason why I have NEVER said good things about you.

F:censored: off,

-me

Bella_Vixen
01-14-2009, 04:44 AM
Dear Becks--

Next time, Patty Moo and/or Armetan will be in charge of the shirts.

That's more then fair, I think.

But yeah, hopefully next time I'll have SOME money.

--me

smileyeagle1021
01-14-2009, 06:55 AM
Dear boss,
not that I'm going to complain about more overtime pay... but you promised me a half shift today as overtime rather than a full shift :cry: now I'm going to be late to class because I assumed I'd have an entire 5 hours to stop by home to pick up my stuff rather than under an hour :cry:

sincerely,
you better pay me for this, Smiley

Evil Queen
01-14-2009, 06:42 PM
Dear Smiley,

Wanna trade?

Not enough hours,
-EQ

monolayth
01-14-2009, 09:35 PM
Dear anyone who is reading.

i do have the flu says the doc. also i am pregnant. wow.

still in shock,

monolayth

Evil Queen
01-14-2009, 09:36 PM
Dear Mono,

:eek:

-EQ

monolayth
01-14-2009, 09:39 PM
dear EQ,

yeah.

wishing the digestive issues would stop,

mono

persephone
01-14-2009, 10:07 PM
Dear Mono,

Congrats? *passes over applesauce, graham crackers and ice*

Those kept me conscious and moving when Baby Girl wouldn't let me eat much of ANYTHING.

Persephone

monolayth
01-14-2009, 10:13 PM
Dear Persephone,

Thanks, I did keep down the ginger ale and crackers today. YAY!

hoping for food tommrrow,
Mono.

crazylegs
01-15-2009, 01:10 AM
Dear Mono,

Wow, well that's a suprise, Congratulations!

Crazylegs

persephone
01-15-2009, 01:15 AM
Dear Mono,

Ginger ale is your FRIEND. As are crackers. I found apple sauce easy too.

Another suggestion -- keep saltines or some kind of crackers in your night stand right by your bed. When you wake up, eat a few before you ever actually get out of bed. It's amazing what just having something in your stomach will do.

Toast worked well for me too, and potatos (baked or in soup). Rather bland oods that were easy to go down. But all babies are different!

If you want more suggestions or need to vent or need anything at all, feel free to PM me. I was there just a few months ago! (Now I get to put up with two and a half months of kicking and feet in my lungs before I get to hold baby!)

Persephone

RetailWorkhorse
01-15-2009, 06:50 AM
Dear Boardsmembers,

ONE HUNDRED AND FIVE DAYS UNTIL I QUIT STORE RETAIL FOR EVER!

I semi-retire starting the first of May!

Dance with me!

:boogie:

-RW
Who won't be RETAILWorkhorse for much longer, but will have to pick a new screen name, dog it!

RootedPhoenix
01-15-2009, 11:59 AM
Dear RW,

*happy dances* YAY! *throws streamers*

SengaKitty
01-15-2009, 08:42 PM
But who am I going to have breakfast with in the morning and talk about various tips and tricks when they're in Utah and I'm tooling around Alabama?

Dear RW,

While you're at it.... No, just kidding. If you happen to come through Louisville, there's a parking lot behind my building, and the SO's a chef, you're more than welcome to come by :D

Sweetly
Rhpg

ETA:
Dear Mono,
Also, fresh fruits and veggies [salads were my bestest friends]. Those kept me going with pooker bear... I swear if i ever see another saltine I'll scream though LOL

Good luck sweety, like I said, it's an amazing ride. I'm here if you need someone

hugs and smiling
Rhpg

Evil Queen
01-16-2009, 01:34 AM
Dear Board,

And now for something completely different.

Much love,
-EQ

Megg
01-16-2009, 03:49 AM
Dear Mono,

Congrats!! Babies are cool. :D

Love,

Megg

Dear EQ,

Sorry I didn't get back to you sooner, been crazy nuts. We sold our house in 7 days.

*dances with joy*

Warmer soon,

Me

Lioness Blackfire
01-16-2009, 04:08 AM
Dear Life,

I keep telling you, but you never listen. The suck. It needs to stop coming in. Suck imports no longer needed. Seriously. Stop it. :( I don't know why you decided to up my suck quota so steeply this week, but if you don't cut back to the usual levels soon, there's going to be nothing left of me to enjoy the weekend.

Enough is enough,
Lioness

RetailWorkhorse
01-16-2009, 04:42 AM
Dear History Channel,

Please....I'm begging.....you're sucking my brains out of my EYEBALLS. STOP BEING SO FASCINATING!

*Stares at TV and soaks it up*

Oh, Hitler's Germany Special, thank you for being here. I'm totally spending the money to go watch Valkyrie.

-RW, a History Buff foe the night

smileyeagle1021
01-16-2009, 09:05 AM
Dear RW,
You have good taste in TV... I knew there was at least one reason I liked you so much.

smiley

Dear Car,
OK, I get the hint, you want to get out of my room and romp around the condo... just so in 3 minute you can sit outside my door whining to come back in... *goes to open door*

smiley

Dear New Guy,
That was a really stupid question last night... of course I don't have a girlfriend... not even going into the whole gay part, I work full time graveyard and take 15 credit hours of school... I don't have time to eat every day or really get enough sleep... how am I supposed to be meeting someone and dating?

Dear general population,
Why is it that there are some people that I set off the gaydar instantly, yet there are so many who look at me and think I'm heterosexuality personified... better question, why are there some people who even after I tell them I'm gay don't believe me and continue to pester me about why I haven't found a girlfriend?

greatly confused, smiley

persephone
01-16-2009, 11:56 AM
Dear stuff,

We move in two weeks and one day. We have a very cute, very pretty house waiting to hold you and just waiting for you to show up! It's empty now and if you got down there early I know landlord would let you go ahead and move in.

So can't you just, you know, pack yourself and get yourself down to that little island? This Momma has a lot of stuff to do to get ready to move and she doesn't feel like packing you in the next two weeks. :p

Love,

the somewhat frazzled pregnant woman in your house



Dear Board,

It's official. We move in two weeks. *sigh* So if I'm sparse for a few weeks getting everything done and ready, I apologize.

Wish us luck!

Love,

Persephone

KiaKat
01-16-2009, 05:00 PM
Dear Persephone,

Much luck!

-Hates Moving

Dear Mono,

Congrats!

-Trying to Talk the Other Half Into Starting a Family NOW

Dear Cold

GO AWAY! 16F is BAD. VERY BAD.

No love,
-The One Who is Never Cold is Now Cold.

monolayth
01-16-2009, 05:47 PM
Dear everyone,
Thanks!
mono,

dear kiakat,

actually was trying to not get preg. on birthcontrol. though no less welcomed.

when i told the daddy he ran out to get me the meds for the nausua and bought me roses, has now been walking around with a smirk on his face.

goodluck,
mono.

KiaKat
01-16-2009, 05:49 PM
Dear Mono,

Of course he is! He now has proof that his sperm are mighty indeed!

Hugs and chicken broth,

-Kia

Becks
01-16-2009, 06:28 PM
Dear Mono,

Congrats.

Take it as a sign.

--me

Lace Neil Singer
01-16-2009, 06:44 PM
Dear English Weather,

Why do you have to be so shit all the time? It's not enough to be nasty drizzle, you have to be gearing up for another cold snap. Please quit with the terribleness, as January is depressing enough without freezing to death all the time.

MannersMakethMan
01-16-2009, 10:18 PM
Dear Sister,

This isn't a good sign is it? Less than a week. I wonder what I'm going to find tomorrow when I get back. Something trivial would be nice for a change. No, I see it's not going to be. Well, that doesn't worry me any, there's a solution to everything if you can bend the rules enough. We'll find out which ones give way.

Chin up until tomorrow,

Your brother


Dear trains,

Please run according to plan tomorrow. Something tells me I'm needed back home. If you've got to muck up, leave it until I come back.

Yours faithfully,

Future traveller

AdminAssistant
01-16-2009, 10:29 PM
Dear driving coordinators,

Thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou THANK YOU for lessening my driving load for next week. I don't know if you somehow realized that I already have two other assignments, or if you let up on everyone, or what, but I'm very very grateful. Yes, I still have two days of 7:00 am to 11:00 pm, but at least I now get a tiny break.

*snuggles*

Dear other TA,

You're my friend and all, but one more word about how you 'deserve' to put in less work next week because you're writing your dissertation and I'm going to freakin' explode. You don't 'deserve' shit. We are ALL supposed to be contributing EQUALLY to hosting this thing, and you deliberately wiggled your way to the cushiest assignment. And do you ever wonder if the reason people are bitchy to you might have anything to do with your craptacular attitude? I swear, you're the most negative person I've ever ever met.

Dear 'guests' next week,

Attention! You are undergraduates competing in a regional theatre festival. You are not special snowflakes. I don't care about your project, your show, your design, how long it took you to get here, or how many Broadway shows you're going to work on when you grow up. Years of rejection have made me cranky and bitter, and putting in a crazy amount of hours volunteering to 'host' all of you only exacerbates that feeling. Also, I will not buy you beer. Just go AWAY. Shoo. Scat. GIT!

~ Cranky volunteer at the host university

Dear Cramps,

Why didn't the naproxen get rid of you? It ALWAYS does! :cry: go away go away go away!!!!

*hmph*

monolayth
01-17-2009, 01:11 AM
Dear everyone,

I know I will be saying and thinking this a bunch the next couple months, but, Can I be a Sea horse???

Please? Pretty Please!

Unconfortable,
mono.

persephone
01-17-2009, 01:15 AM
Dear mono,

I wish! Sea horses have it easy!

Persephone -- who feels like a whale and definitely has sympathy. 10 weeks to go!

RetailWorkhorse
01-17-2009, 05:57 AM
Dear Skull,

THE BRAIN!!! IT HURTS!!!! MAKE IT STOOOOOOOP!!!!!!

In AGONY DAMMIT,
RW

Dear Pills,

KICK IN DAMN YOU!

Guh,
RW

Dear Winter,

I never said I wanted you. LEAVE ME ALONE! Quit STALKING ME.

Needs the Summer,
RW

Dear Helen-Glen's-Wife,

I swear, if your hubby doesn't stop sexually harassing me I'm going to do something about it. Involving Lye, a chainsaw, a porcelain bathtub, and a boat. It's not cute anymore.

The cutie behind the counter,
RW

Dear Dad,

Next time Glen comes in I'm CALLING YOU and you BETTER GET YOUR ASS TO MY WORK TO HELP ME DEFEND WHAT'S LEFT OF MY HONOUR!

-Your Son, who's starting to get really paranoid.

Dear Somebody,

I used to fight with EQ about getting laid. Now that she does it and I don't, I have no one to fight with.

I know I'm generally strung up pretty high and I need to learn to just frikken chill, but I don't think getting laid is going to do it.

What I really need, is to be able to blow stuff up again.

Really. Honest.

Someone get me World of Warcraft and two wireless air cards (because Verizon aircards only let you have a 5GB limit and WoW would kill that in the first set of updates, so I'd need two for a total of 10GB at 120$ a month, unless someone knows how I can get WoW going without having to pay that much every damned month**) before I pop.

Or at least allow the cell phone antenna to go back to functioning so I can go back to playing Guild Wars (And kill Charr!!). Whichever's easiest.

-Starting to TWITCH again,
RW


**Footnote: I'm constantly mobile, so no landlines, or cable lines, and Hugesnet (Satellite) has too much of a lag in order for me to be able to participate in raids. Not that I'd do much in the way of raiding. I am a solo-player most of the time, anyhow. I would like to play again, though. Gods, I hate being the only RVer on this board. >.>

RootedPhoenix
01-17-2009, 06:25 AM
RW,

I'm sorry. *offers herbal tea* :( Not being able to blow stuff up is hard.

And as for weird, creep-you-out people...there's always catapults. How you choose to use them is your decision. :devil:

--RP

Dear body,

Grrr.

--Me.

Nurian
01-17-2009, 06:41 AM
Dear Couples of the World,

Stop hating. I have enough hate for all of us.

Evil Queen
01-17-2009, 06:17 PM
Dear RW,

What does getting laid have to do with anything?

Confused,
-EQ

PS. If I was there, I'd be nice and defend your honour.

Dreamstalker
01-17-2009, 11:09 PM
Dear USPS:

I want my proton gun parts. NOW.

I would think that an insured widget would be a bit less susceptible to being sucked into limbo. The sender's post office claims it was scanned in my town and this was delivered on December freaking third.. Nope. My PO says that a pickup slip was left...I never got one. The only way it could be considered delivered after a slip is left is if I signed for it at the post office, which obviously did not happen. The sender never received it back as unclaimed, so where the hell is it?!

It's a bunch of cast resin bits. You can't build a dirty bomb out of resin...at least I don't think you can. Trust me, I'm not going to do anything evil with this stuff, so give it back. Please?

RootedPhoenix
01-18-2009, 12:44 AM
Dear life,

STOP IT. $80 is not what I want to pay to replace my laptop's power cord. Cough it up.

--Me.

Evil Queen
01-18-2009, 03:32 AM
Dear life,

STOP IT. $80 is not what I want to pay to replace my laptop's power cord. Cough it up.

--Me.

Dear RP
Good luck RP. RW had to pay over $200 for his when he had a laptop. He would have LOVED to pay $80.

-EQ

Dear Work,

Hi. :wave: Remember me? I'm sure you do. I just left you about 10 minutes ago. I'd like more hours, please. I have three days off this week. Please call me in one of those days.

-EQ

RetailWorkhorse
01-18-2009, 04:34 AM
Dear RW,

What does getting laid have to do with anything?

Confused,
-EQ

PS. If I was there, I'd be nice and defend your honour.

Dear EQ,

Tension release. Now teach that boy of yours that I'm not giving up my desktop just because I want a laptop for gaming, too.

-RW, who's back to looking at Sagers again

RetailWorkhorse
01-18-2009, 06:50 AM
Dear Cell Phone Tower,

I don't know why I even bother.

-A PISSED Customer

Dear endorphins,

Yes, I'm angry. Yes, I seem to be getting angry a lot lately. Yes, I just want to go jump off a motherfucking cliff to get away from it all.

But I am sick and tired of this place. And so long as I'm here with the shit that's going on happening, I'm going to be like this for a while.

Don't like it?

Then don't look at me.

-Das Mel

RootedPhoenix
01-18-2009, 10:11 AM
Dear RP
Good luck RP. RW had to pay over $200 for his when he had a laptop. He would have LOVED to pay $80.

-EQ


eq,

:eek: that's.....awful. i've really gotta find that cord.

--rp

me,

good going. you knocked the soup onto your keyboard and get to type everything without any capitals because you have to use the on screen keyboard thingy. goooooood wooooork, twerp.

--me

iradney
01-18-2009, 10:58 AM
Dear Job Market

Please hire me. I do not want to work for *company* a minute longer than I have to.

With lots of love
Rads

Akasa
01-18-2009, 11:07 AM
Dear Neighbors,
STOP WITH THE FIREWORKS ALREADY! The police have been out 2x because of you and you stop for a while then start up again. IT IS 2AM FFS!

Just be glad you didn't wake me up. I would come out there and kick someone's ass.

Akasa

CaroPhoenix
01-19-2009, 01:46 PM
Dear throat,

Why do you have to hurt so much that it's horrible to talk?

:cry:
Rummy

-----------------------------------------
Dear nose,

Stop with the drip drip drip down my already sore throat!

:cry: :cry:
Rummy
---------------------------------------------
Dear head,

Why do you feel so stuffed up with cotton or something that I feel like I'm dizzy and about to topple over?

:cry: :cry: :cry:
Rummy
--------------------------------------------------
Moomy Dearest,

Do not call me up to just to lecture me about how I went out in "the cold" yesterday and now I'm sick. A little sympathy would go a long way, you know? Now, stop calling me for a while.

:mad:
Your Daughter

smileyeagle1021
01-19-2009, 02:43 PM
Dear Walter,

I've to work graveyard shift now, do you have any advice on how to stay up at night?

I'm so going to turn that question into Jeff Dunham and see if he uses it in his show,
your devoted fan, Smiley

Dear Peanut,
you rock beyond belief, show Salt Lake NO MERCY

your fan,
Smiley

Dear Achmed,
no, I kill you :p

Dear Jose,
Please go to the Carl's Jr. on North Temple and explain to them the difference between you and guacomole.

Dear Melvin
I :love: your nose ;)

Dear Jeff,
I love you man. Your show this Thursday is going to kick ass. I can hardly wait.

P.S. From one guy to another, your wife is hawt ;)

iradney
01-19-2009, 03:04 PM
Dear IDR

Have some lemon and honey tea with a shot of whiskey. Tell Mr Rum he can take care o'hisself for a change while you get over that nasty bug. Tune your Mom out - *HUGS*
Oh
AND GET SOME SLEEP!!!!!

Love
Rads

persephone
01-19-2009, 04:14 PM
Dear Eagles,

Why? Why? WHY!!!!!!????!!!!!????? Why do you hate me so!? Five times in eight years you get SO CLOSE and then you just fall apart! Do you really want to make the seven months pregnant woman cry? Is that fun for you? Cause that's what you did! :cry:

I still love you but that doesn't mean I like you right now....

a die hard fan



Dear Steelers,

Now if you can only keep it together and win this Super Bowl. I don't care if it's the Cardinal's destiny year -- you're the PITTSBURGH STEELERS!! SHOW NO MERCY!!! KILL EM IF YOU HAVE TO!!!! :p

*sigh* At least I got HALF of my all Pennsylvania Super Bowl.

the crazy football lady



Dear evil Red Birds,

*grumblegrumble*stupid freakin red bird Arizona crap team*grumblegrumble*

Oldest franchise in the NFL and you're JUST NOW making it to the Super Bowl? I hope you fall flat on your butts. :p :D

No love coming from this household,

A die hard Pennsylvania sports fan