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counterjockey
11-09-2008, 05:31 PM
This Sunday, five or so in the morning. The long end of my overnight shift at the c-store where I've worked for years now. A guy comes in with his wife and 3-year-old and wander about for a few minutes. Nearly all of my customers this time of day are regulars, but I don't recognize these folks. I assume they're from out of town, maybe staying with family here. They're getting a gallon of milk, a package of Hostess cinnamon rolls, a loaf of bread, orange juice, etc.

The guy does two laps of the store. Where are your eggs?. I don't think I'll be able to help him there. We almost never have eggs in stock, because we hardly sell them, which is why we almost never have them in stock. And that's circular reasoning, I know, and I think about that circular reasoning several times a week when somebody comes in and asks if we sell eggs. "If we got 'em, they're in the cooler. That second door, in with the milk and lunchmeat," I say. He looks through the door, shakes his head. No eggs.

By rights, I shouldn't feel bad if I just let it go. They found six out of seven things they were looking for, and #7 is a long shot at a place that still does a lot of the old "holy troika": gas, smokes, and Cokes. Well, there's no eggs, the guy says to his wife. So what now? Neither of them are looking at me, talking to me. This of course is my cue to be a helpful dumbass.

"There's a Hy Vee just up the road. A supermarket. they'll have eggs," I say.

Husband and wife look at each other. Should we? The wife nods, and then they put all their merchandise back. Bread, milk, cruddy shipped-in-from-warehouse cinnamon rolls, altogether about $10 worth of stuff. We'll just go there. Thanks! I send them on their way and then take off my glasses so I can do a good facepalm.

Always remember, kids, be helpful *after* you've got the money...

Amina516
11-09-2008, 05:36 PM
Always remember, kids, be helpful *after* you've got the money...

LMAO!!!

But really? A convienience store that doesnt sell eggs? Thats not very convienient...:p::roll::lol:

Bright_Star
11-09-2008, 05:52 PM
I always tell the customers at Sam's Club that if they can't find the particular item that they're looking for then they ought to try Wally World. They get shocked as if I'm suggesting to them that they go to the "competition'. BUT Wally World & Sam's Club are both part of the same company so you figure how one can be the others competitor...lol.

Mike Taylor
11-11-2008, 06:50 AM
I always tell the customers at Sam's Club that if they can't find the particular item that they're looking for then they ought to try Wally World. They get shocked as if I'm suggesting to them that they go to the "competition'. BUT Wally World & Sam's Club are both part of the same company so you figure how one can be the others competitor...lol.

This is the same planet where fully grown adults look at light refracting through the water droplets from their sprinklers and think it's caused by chemicals put in by the "teh ebil gummint".