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View Full Version : Ok i feel kind of bad


Sliceanddice
02-20-2009, 09:55 PM
So last week or so me and my dad had a fight where he kept apologizing for making me late for work even when i was practically screaming that i didnt care about being late. I had been mad that i made an effort to give bring him our dog to play with which he had been whining about not being able too see that of often and been calling me all morning to make sure i didnt forget the dog, and when i got there he wasnt waiting and i called him 5 times in his parking loot, and waited 5 minutes (when i only had 14 minutes to drop off the dog (should have taken me two minute) run by the bank and get to work) and called another 5 times trying to reach him as i ran to the bank.

anyway i just gave up the argument
he didnt understand and i was sick of trying to explain it.

anyway hes been clingy ever sense, i thought we where better once he and i went to see underworld 3: ride of the lycans. (side note im officially unable to embarrassed anymore about being with my dad when there a sex scene in a movie) but this weeks hes been clingy.

as in wednesday i didnt have work, he kept calling ever 10 to 30 minutes, until i finally let him come over to see the dog think he would walk her again play with her and then knowing i had homework would leave. an hour after he was there i finally kick him out because i need a nap and hes was distracting me anyways from my home work.
he then while i nap calls every 15 minutes for 4 hours.

i dont work thursday
again calls all day, just have him call baby girl in a voice that makes me want to kill him, he comes and walks my dog again (two days in a row now great my dogs going to limp for a few days she doesn't do well with over exertion) and whines over a box my mom ordered... something about Idaho Spuds (i later tried them not bad)
im about to go insane because i have to go to school and i he knows i wont leave alone in my house.
he also askes ten times in the last 2 days for money. He knows i wont give him any unless its a major emergency (ER, BAIL, His car just died) because he owes me 500 dollars and has paid me back 100 dollars of the 600 he should have paid back to me by now because he woud ome whining back to me at the end of the month because he cant manage his own money.

and today i dont work (woohoo for three days in a row)
he calls me once before i go back to sleep (i havent been able to sleep well for days now its bugging me) and he comes over when i wake up, plays with my dog, can goes out to the car with me to help my car. he keeps bugging me about why i dont seem happy.
and i finally unload on him.
i feel alittle bad because i could see i hurt him, but you know what if hes not willing to work out problems with me, and would rather run off at conflict why should i expect anything else from him.

wagegoth
02-20-2009, 11:52 PM
That's too bad. I'm glad my parents are 300 miles away.

Slice, I guess I missed the post where you moved out. Are you living alone? Are your siblings all moved out too?

RetailWorkhorse
02-21-2009, 04:33 AM
Unplug the phone.

Or switch the ringer to silence.

Sliceanddice
02-21-2009, 06:29 AM
no i dont live alone.

sigh my dad is bipolar and has a history of crime, when i was younger he was looked up for about a year and he made a promise to my mother to never break the law again.
When i was 18 almost 19 i was woken up by a police officer (embarrassed because since i was hot i slept topless and i woke up with such a shook that i kind of flashed him) and found out my father was being arrested for identy theft.
they took all the electronics in the house that wherent televisions, and ended up breaking about a thousand dollars worth of equipment, and of course showed no care for what my father could get ahold of and what not.

my mother told him after that he wasnt welcolm back in her house.
He was abuseive and manipulative so i have never been sorry my parents are seperated, and i have never told him i wanted them back together but he believes i do. the only time he stay with us ever again was for one week after he got out of prison while the bishops looked for a place for him to stay and then my mother stayed with my grand mother.

my sister wont talk to him because when he was in her life she felt the need to cut or to try to kill herself, and he brings those desires out of her.
my brother barely toerates him because my father is a loach and a moach who demands attention at all times.
i give a part of my life because i know as i have since i was 16 my fathers disease will kill him, weither it will be by overdose or accident and i made a promise to myself to a least try so when the time came i would have no regrets.

i plan on at 25 to begin searching avenues to have children.
I don't plan on him being alive to know them and if he does him haveing much enteraction.

TTAZ
02-21-2009, 02:26 PM
Jeebus, I can feel for you. I was engaged to a bi-polar person who refused medication until I threw him out. It's awful especially when with treatment it can be dealt with and you see a loved one refuse to do it. I am lucky in that I could break away completely when it got to be too much, I can't even imagine the heartbreak of having a parent in such a way.

On a lighter note, I don't live terribly far from you and if you want to practice your kid skills before having any, I offer very reasonable rental rates on a two year old son. In fact I'm running a special: Rent the Ickle for one year, get the next year free! :p

Gravekeeper
02-21-2009, 02:40 PM
Jeebus, I can feel for you. I was engaged to a bi-polar person who refused medication until I threw him out.

Ugh, yes, its extremely difficult. I had an ex that was manic depressive ( But didn't show it until we moved in together. ). There were only two moods: Off and Screaming Hurricane. She finally admitted she had a problem and sought help. They put her on Paxil. All was good. She was happy. There were no more random destroy the entire house screaming tantrums over the simplest things.

Than she decided she had a moral objection to taking medication and stopped taking it. Screaming, raging chaos re-ensued. Our relationship deteriorated and we broke up. She moved out, landlord expressed thankful gratitude that I was the one that stayed. As he and his family could hear her tearing around and swearing at the top of her lungs on a daily basis because she couldn't find her keys or whatever today's raging crisis was.

Its a difficult position. All the more so when the person is related too you. With a significant other at least if you break up that's that. There are no other ties.

Of course, I haven't talked to my father in something like 9 years. Nor do I want too. But I live hundreds and hundreds of kilometers from him now. -.-

lupo pazzesco
02-21-2009, 03:26 PM
Bi-polar is always difficult to live with, whether your the afflicted, or just someone who lives with them. My ex-roomie is bi-polar. He went off his meds without telling anyone while his wife was in Sweden (whom I also suspect was bi-polar, just undiagnosed and unmedicated...)

An entire month of me, coming off of a nervous breakdown, dealing with an unmedicated bi-polar who stopped taking his topamax.

and my other ex-roomie wasn't all that much better when she returned from Sweden. That one semester/year was pure, unadulterated hell.

And female ex-roomie is really really curious why I adamantly refuse to live with her again, and far prefer living on my own. The tale of what I went through is a saga in and of itself, but I should prolly stop threadjacking.

Slice. I feel your pain, is what I've been trying to say through all my rambling. I hope the situation gets marginally better, but unfortunately, have no advice. Just lots of empathy, tea and cookies...have as much as you'd like.