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View Full Version : One crisis is over, another is just beginning (language and long)


goldaries13
04-07-2009, 09:00 PM
You'll have to forgive me if I don't make a lot of sense and ramble in this post. I've been crying and my fingers are still shaking.

The Millie crisis is over, she's gone and has been officially for a few days. Unfortunately, a personal crisis has taken that crisis's place.

My husband works in a physical therapy/rehab center as a receptionist/intake counselor. Today he collapsed at work and was sent to the hospital. I had some trouble getting up there, since 1) I was at work and couldn't leave until my CW Joe took over, 2) I can't drive (obviously), and had to take a bus to the hospital the hubs was sent to (in the next county over, which is where he works).

About three hours from when I initially got the call later, I arrive at the hospital and have to wait another two hours before a doctor comes to talk to me. I wasn't worried; it's busy, and I assume the hubs only collapsed due to lack of sleep, hunger, dehydration, or any combo of the three because he's so busy all the time.

The news was much different. The doc told me apparently The Dane didn't just collapse, he had a seizure. Since he'd never had a seizure before, they were looking into possible causes. However, the doc said, they were almost certain it was a brain tumor from the MRI, and my husband was in surgery so they could confirm. The doctor then proceeded to tell me they were thinking it was a oligoastrocytoma, or some other glioma (I did my research when I got home, and apparently, that's bad). It's rare, especially given The Dane's age (he's 23), and he also said a bunch of stuff about it possibly being low grade, and the seizure only occurring because of the location, but they won't know till the biopsy's done.

Christ. I eventually went home because there's not much I can do till the results come back, which should be sometime tomorrow, most likely. I'm keeping my fingers crossed, and calling off tomorrow so I can see my husband (he was still in surgery when I left). My friends are over, my mom is flying up, and I'm still trying to get in touch with his mom and/or stepdad.

Honestly, does someone hate me and The Dane or something? If it's not one thing, it's another. I think getting married caused some goddamned cosmic shift in the universe and someone is slinging handfuls of shit into our cosmic fan.

Rapscallion
04-07-2009, 10:19 PM
Take your time - we'll be here for you.

Rapscallion

Lil Bunny
04-07-2009, 10:24 PM
Sending tons of hugs, good thoughts and prayers if you're into that.

*HUGS*

El Pollo Guerrera
04-08-2009, 04:18 AM
Holy crap...

Best wishes and prayers out to you and your husband.

Akasa
04-08-2009, 06:38 AM
Holy shit!
/hugs
We're here for you and if you need to vent or have someone to talk to we're here.

RootedPhoenix
04-08-2009, 07:41 AM
:eek: That's awful!

*offers hugs, prayers, and comfort* Anything else, we're here for you.

goldaries13
04-08-2009, 08:22 AM
Thanks, guys... It really means a lot.

My mom just got here an hour ago, and I guess she's intent on holding down the fort in my husband's absence: she's already starting on the cooking (why is it in a crisis, moms always turn to the stove? Ah, no matter, it's amusing me how she goes on about the lack of bacon grease in my house and how can she be expected to make me a proper comfort meal without it :rant: I love my mom). His mom, on the other hand, is still waiting on a flight; she's probably not going to be here till tomorrow night at best.

My friends are also still here: In the 12 or so hours they've been here, they've broken open my husband's "panic" cabinet (that would be the good booze), and had me drink some to calm my nerves. Nobody's gotten any sleep at this point, but they will after I leave and they go home.

In a few hours, I'm taking a bus to see the hubs. I'll probably be up there most of the day. I don't see him coming home for another two days at least. After that, I have no idea whether he'll resume normal activities (work and school). I doubt it for now.

I talked with my CW Joe, who told me that the higher ups have been alerted and no one expects me to come in today. I still talked with my manager and cleared it, regardless. It's funny: Wally World gets a lot of crap for not caring about it employees, but apparently within hours, everyone at my store was trying to make it easier on me so I could spend time with The Dane. I'm still, for my own sanity, going back to work on Friday, though (Thursday I already had off due to someone's creative scheduling so I could have my birthday off. Happy freaking birthday to me).

I'll keep you guys posted. Thank you a million times over.

CaroPhoenix
04-08-2009, 12:55 PM
:hugs:

Also, I'll be praying for your Dane and for you.

I have nothing else to say, just that we're all here for you.

mandaliz8704
04-08-2009, 01:07 PM
Oh my gosh... I hope that you get good news from the doctors.

Tireana Dorcha
04-08-2009, 02:33 PM
I am sending you many good thoughts and prayers (to any and every diety I can think of!).

And thank goodness for parents and friends. As others have said, we're here for you if you need anything! Don't be afraid to ask :)

SengaKitty
04-08-2009, 04:25 PM
Oh honey :hug: We're all here for you if you need us, I'm sending out all the good thoughts and prayers I can, and lighting candles for you and your Dane. Please know you can come here and vent about anything

Becks
04-08-2009, 05:13 PM
*Hugs and happy thoughts*

goldaries13
04-08-2009, 08:06 PM
Home; Mumsy took me to and from the hospital. Buses, in her opinion, are filthy dirty things for hobos and thugs. No offense to anyone who takes the bus.

His sisters spent the night with him, and were downright chilly to me and my mother when we arrived. Apparently, The Dane was in and out during the night, and while he had no idea who his sisters were sometimes, he kept asking for me. This is my fault how? All we've ever really had since we met was each other, his family all but disowned him when we initially dated, and gah Iwantthesebitchestofalldownaverydeepholeintothepit sofhell!

Sorry, but my sisters-in-law (four of them) and I have never gotten along, probably because he's the youngest of them and he's oh so fragile and must be protected from the scary wheelchair lady!!!11!!

*looks at rest of post* I spend way too much time around you guys. Or reading Irv and GK's posts. Or something.

Anyway. My mother shoves them all out of the room ("Well, bless your hearts! [oh, noes, Mom is about to talk some trash in the way only old southern ladies do] But I do believe my daughter is the next of kin, right? And this is the ICU? Oh, goodness me, the rest of us should get out into the lounge before the nurses come and give us holy hell!" *winks at me* Love you, too, Mom! :respect:)

So me and The Dane, who is out at the moment, are alone. He comes to fairly quickly. The whir of my wheelchair is like his alarm clock, I swear.

TD: You... did not get any sleep last night.
Me: You... are all hopped up on painkillers and can't think coherantly.
TD: Touche.

He had no idea what happened. The last thing he remembered was getting ready for work... a week ago. He thought it was the 2nd. And he had no idea why he was in the hospital and why he had bandages on his head.

I filled him in as best as I could. After I did so, we waited for a doctor or a nurse or someone.

We got an answer around noon. And it's little more complex than even the first explanation. First, the sequences, which will be referred to as good, bad, and so-so as we go on:

1)It was indeed a tumor that caused the seizure (so-so, we knew this was coming)
2)They successfully removed the tumor that caused the seizure (good, as it means other than some monitoring, we may not have to worry about it at all)
3) The tumor that caused the seizure was a benign schwannoma about the size of a golf ball (so-so, leaning toward good; the size indicates it was caught on the late side of early)
4) As they removed the schwannoma, they came across another, larger tumor, that, in an MRI they did after the surgery, seemed to be the size of a small orange (bad, as that means it's probably been there awhile)
5) They were able to remove only a small portion of the second tumor, just enough to make a diagnosis (bad, getting worse; that means chemo and/or radiation if it's determined to be inoperable, which it probably is)
6) The second tumor is the tumor that the doctor yesterday was telling me about. This is the oligoastrocytoma (Bad? We've just entered hell)

Forgive the medical terms, I'm only spitting out what the doctor said.

So we were alternately thrilled, relieved, and floored. The Dane's only staying in the hospital another day after today, and after that, he can resume school, since he's graduating in a month anyway, and only has to go to classes since he already presented his thesis in the fall. He was going to go on and get his certification and Doctor of Physical Therapy degree, but that will have to wait until after treatment, probably a year from now, optimistically. He's taking a six month leave of absence from work, instead of quitting (I was called by his boss on the way home and told it was all set up)

The doc hesitated to give us a prognosis so early, but did say with a bit of aggressive treatment, the chances are probably somewhere in the neighborhood of 60% of The Dane surviving after five years. 60 is better than nothing at this point.

The Dane is worried, more so than I thought, but after talking with his mother yesterday, it made sense. His dad died when he was a kid, also of some form of brain cancer, although his father's symptoms were severe(headaches, vomiting, etc.) and came on quite suddenly, and the only symptom The Dane has displayed thus far is a seizure, despite the rather major growth of both tumors.

Here's hoping. All prayers, good thoughts, vibes, etc. are noted and appreciated!

AdminAssistant
04-08-2009, 10:23 PM
I'm glad your doctor was so upfront and honest with you - my mom's oncologist was the same way and I think it helped. Cancer treatment is growing by leaps and bounds all the time, so keep your chin up! A positive attitude is the #1 secret to fighting cancer. That, and finding a community of support. Best of luck to the both of you!

BookstoreEscapee
04-08-2009, 10:24 PM
Wow, that's a lot to take in. Sounds like there's a good bit of hopefulness mixed in with the bad stuff; I'm sending good vibes. :hug:

PizzaDrone
04-08-2009, 10:41 PM
Sorry to hear your bad news, but the support from your mother and the honesty from the doctors is good. It might not seem like it and everything's still up in the air for now.

Sending good vibes your way and to your husband.

goldaries13
04-09-2009, 06:35 PM
Not much to report today. I did succeed is getting into an argument with all my sisters-in-law, though. I was visiting the Dane and after I stepped out for a minute, they met me in the hall way and asked why they were being denied a chance to see him. Now, the way things are done at this hospital in the ICU, patients tell the nurses or other personnel they don't want to see somone and they forward it to the person who checks IDs at the desk and it's added to a list. If your name is on the list, you're denied access. It's meant to give patients privacy and whatnot. Knowing this, I stated the policy as the Dane explained it.

A reasonable person would assume "Hey, our brother added us to a list of people he didn't want to see. Maybe we should back off."

My SILs have never been known for this. They think I said something to get them banned. It wasn't much of an argument, but it riled me a bit.

He comes home tomorrow! I'm happy he'll be home. We already agreed my mother will stay with us for the next month, so I can finish out the semester. Next semester is still up in the air for me, but we already agreed not to worry about it; chances are something will pop up so we can resume normal life.

He'll be starting radiation soon (no chemo yet, the doctors are optimistic radiation with possible surgery later on will work). It's a rather complex form known as Intensity-modulated radiation therapy, which he'll be starting next Friday. The doctors wanted to start as soon as possible. He goes about four days a week for seven weeks to start.

Intensity-modulated radiation therapy (IMRT) is an advanced mode of high-precision radiotherapy that utilizes computer-controlled x-ray accelerators to deliver precise radiation doses to a malignant tumor or specific areas within the tumor. IMRT allows for the radiation dose to conform more precisely to the three-dimensional (3-D) shape of the tumor by modulating—or controlling—the intensity of the radiation beam. IMRT also allows higher radiation doses to be focused to regions within the tumor while minimizing the dose to surrounding normal critical structures. (from this (http://www.radiologyinfo.org/en/info.cfm?pg=imrt) website)

They were doing some CT scans today in preparation for it. Dr. L (the oncologist from yesterday) told me this type of radiation is a positive thing; it means the tumor's not within or near a critical area. If it were, they'd have to do some other form. They're hoping radiation will take care of most, if not all, of the tumor.

Dr. L did prepare us by saying surgery may be needed down the road. The only reason they won't do surgery now is because of the size of the tumor, not the location. He explained it like this: "Brain surgery is a very delicate process. The other tumor that we did remove required extensive precision to remove, and the size of this tumor... Well, the risks of removing it via surgery outweigh the benefits. It's not near a critical structure, but one false step and removing it could damage a critical structure anyway."

He went on to say now that with the recent overhauls in the surgical department (most of the surgical staff was fired and replaced recently due to careless mistakes), he trusts the surgical dept. to operate and not make a mistake, but this is one case where the tumor is best controlled by radiation first. If it doesn't completely remove it and just shrinks it to a more manageable size for surgery, then they'll operate.

I like this guy. Pulls no punches, doesn't dance around the issues, a real straightshooter, as my mother says. He gave us the issues with operating up front. Despite the fact it's a grade 1 tumor (the lowest grade assigned, so that's a relief), there's still risks, and he didn't try to hide any of that from us.

Okay, so maybe there was a lot to report. But right now, I'm feeling pretty optimistic (despite my earlier assertion I'm useless in a crisis). Thanks to all, especially Rummy and Plaidman for their messages to me. You guys are all awesome.

Eireann
04-09-2009, 07:48 PM
May his recovery be so fast, it will be as if he were never hospitalized at all.

Der Cute
04-09-2009, 10:07 PM
I'm sorry things aren't peachy keen at the moment. It's got to be difficult, knowing there's an enemy in a place you can't just reach in and strangle quickly (many times I wished I could fix my epilepsy...but you just can't.)

TBH I think it's great they've got a plan of attack (so to speak) for the tumor, and that the team has been put into good shape. I am going to hope and cross my fingers for you and the Dane.

I"m also glad your work is working with you on this. Would be a good story to write out if a manager said "Oh, he's got a tumor? YOU still need to come into work! *cracks whip*" I've had managers like that. They suck elephant you-know-whats.

Anyways, here's a hug, and a kitty bonk from Miss Fuzzy. *bonk*

Keep up the good spirits!

Cutenoob

Bella_Vixen
04-09-2009, 10:48 PM
*many hugs and good thoughts*

goldaries13
04-10-2009, 09:30 PM
He's home. I went to the hospital this morning to get him.

Now it's a waiting game till his radiation starts. My mother will be driving him to and from his appointments.

On the note of mothers, his arrived last night. Most of you know of my general distaste for the daughters she has brought into this world, and probably assume I don't like her all that much either. You'd be right, but most of the time, I don't mind her because, really, as long as she stays in Denmark, I'm happy. This wasn't the case when I initially met the Dane, but this is another story for another time.

As I said, as long as MIL stays in Denmark, I'm happy because she can't do much damage. But now she is in my neck of the woods and I have to be on guard. She's never been good for the Dane's health, being largely the cause of my husband's shot nerves when we met. I believe I actually said to her once, "Lady, if your son went to a college out in the middle of podunk nowhere just because it was in the States, maybe you should evaluate your parenting style."

But I digress.

She's staying in a hotel (:worship:), because we live in a crappy one bedroom and have no room now that my mother's pulled up residence on our couch. MIL doesn't like being in a hotel, but she has no say because it's first come first serve and my mother arrived first.

She dropped up today while I was at work, and apparently she worked the Dane up so much he had a panic attack. He hasn't had one in almost two years. Remember how my mother occasionally forgets all form of polite society manners? It happened again and my mother smacked his mother. Mumsy is very protective of her son in law, viewing him to be the sensitive, artistic son she never had after a string of five good ol' boys.

So Mumsy forced MIL out of the house and got the Dane calmed down. She's since mentioned the words 'restraining order,' but The Dane and I don't think it's necessary. We are, however, probably going to change the locks. (It was a dumb idea to give her a key anyway)

I don't hate her, I don't hate her, I don't hate... Screw it, I hate her. After his dad died, The Dane was alternatively smothered and ignored by this woman, mostly ignored. I understand she was under strain, raising five kids by yourself is hard, my mom had to raise eight(six her own, two from my dad's previous relationship) largely on her own after my own dad died. But this... person largely ignored him by her own admission because she thought he looked too much like his dad. After years of ignoring him, though, she got all up in arms after he met me and we started dating. I've never gotten the full story on that, but a small part of it had to do with my refusal to come to Denmark one summer to meet her.

At the time, we weren't serious, just kind of hanging out. I wasn't going to waste my family's money (which was hard to come by with a single woman taking care of eight kids) just to flight out for a week to meet the mother of someone I wasn't serious about at the time. In addition, it's a pain to deal with planes and wheelchairs. So I said no and she's hated me ever since.

I really wish she'd just stay away. Having panic attacks isn't good for him, especially right now. Why does she insist on making things worse?

XCashier
04-11-2009, 01:33 AM
You're in a rough situation, and having in-laws like that certainly doesn't help. On the plus side, sounds like you've got a good oncologist, one who's honest and knows what he's doing, plus you've got the support of your mom and friends.

And us on CS. I'm praying for you and the Dane. Best wishes for a speedy and thorough recovery, and for life to return to normal quickly. :hug:

CaroPhoenix
04-11-2009, 01:37 AM
:hug:

I completely understand the hating of the in-laws (especially the MIL). Why do you think I drink rum all the time? :roll:

Close your eyes, take a deep breath, and repeat, "She will leave soon."

And if all else fails, I have a huge bottle of Sailor Jerry's Rum in my kitchen. You just have to provide the cups! ;)

Becks
04-11-2009, 01:56 AM
*more hugs and good vibes*

goldaries13
04-12-2009, 01:22 AM
I blew up at my mother in law today, and I think I did a lot of damage.

I'm not going to quote everything that happened word for word, but my MIL came over today (while I was there), and tried to stir up trouble again. She tried saying how we were horrible to her for forcing her to stay in a hotel rather than letting her stay here to take care of her son (that's rich, you didn't want to take care of him when he lived with you, why start now?), that I was a horrible wife for not taking more time off work to be with him(considering mine is the only income we have now that he's taking a leave of absence, I don't have a choice. I would love to spend more time with him, but I can't.), and that we were being stupid for not instantly hopping the first plane to Denmark to seek real medical care(right, that radiation treatment he's going to have? It's just a glowy strobe light. And those pills they're giving him for pain? Those are just M&Ms).

I tried to politely tell her all the things she was saying were, in this order, 1)not possible, 2) not financially sound, and 3) both, but then she blew up at me and starting screaming she wanted to hop the first flight home. Fine, go. But then she insisted she wanted my husband, and only my husband, to take her to the airport. My mother and I weren't allowed to go.

Uh, :wtf:? His doctors said he shouldn't drive, due to the risk of seizures. I told her this, and her response? "Well, That's just too bad! He'll just have to risk it!"

Cue the scary wife music, please. It sounds like that music they played during the shower scene in psycho. Or maybe that music in jaws. I can never remember.

I proceeded to tell her, using a very calm tone of voice that was edging on psychotic angry, that she was a horrible mother, that I was not risking my husband's life for her selfish whim, and she was never allowed in my house again, and quite frankly, I hated her because she was responsible for her son's mental problems, confidence issues, and because she was an all-around selfish, bitchy shrew. I told her I hoped she died miserable, penniless, alone, and in twice as much pain as my husband was in now.

She tried appealing to the Dane when she saw I was serious, but he simply told her to leave and forget he existed. "It shouldn't be too hard for you, right? You've been doing it for years." He was in tears when he said that, not because I was demonizing her (as she was claiming), but because he saw she genuinely didn't care for him. I mean, disregarding your son's life just for your own purposes is pretty low.

She left, threatening to take us both to court and get appointed as his medical proxy. Good riddance. We're still getting calls from the SILs, but we're ignoring them.

How can she be so coldhearted? I'm glad she's gone, but christ! The Dane's a mess and it's going to take a lot to get him okay again. He says it's not me, but I can't help feeling guilty. Did I go too far?

XCashier
04-12-2009, 01:46 AM
I don't think you went too far at all; in fact, it sounds like you were doing your best to keep things from going too far.

The fact that she wanted her son to drive despite his condition, and totally blew it off when it was pointed out to her, just shows that you are in the right. If she has that little regard for her son's safety, she has no business being his medical proxy.

Was your mom there to witness the arguement? Just in case it does go to court, a witness would be good.

Damn, that is so twisted. I'm sorry you have to go through this. :( :hug:

BookstoreEscapee
04-12-2009, 02:29 AM
Not sure she could win a case to become his medical proxy anyway, without proving that you both are incompetent to serve in that capacity. At the moment he is able to make his own medical decisions, and his wife would automatically assume that responsibility should he become unable to. She would have a pretty big burden of proof to win that case. At any rate, it sounds like she deserved it. Seems she wants to be the martyr and have everyone feel sorry for her because her baby boy is sick...without the caring about the fact that her son is sick part, of course (cuz that part is messy and hard).

I'm glad your mom is there for you both. She sounds like a good egg. (Get it?...tomorrow's Easter...Easter egg...heh...oh, shush and have a chocolate bunny). :p

And a :hug: for good measure.

Irving Patrick Freleigh
04-12-2009, 02:53 AM
Yes, you did do a lot of damage. And all of it was justified.

I too hope your own mom was there to see all of this. I wouldn't put anything past your mother-in-law.

tropicsgoddess
04-12-2009, 03:14 AM
Wow, your MIL is a real piece of work, ignoring her son after all these years and then suddenly she wants to make herself out to be the martyr mom that she isn't at all. I can't believe she had the audacity to even demand that The Dane drive her to the airport even though it's risky for his health and not give a rat's ass. I don't think she would even have a snowball's chance in hell to be medical proxy considering the way she's treated him all these years and usually the spouse is the first in line to make any decisions like that should they become incapacitated. Speaking of decisions, I know it may sound a little uh...off, but considering The Dane's condition, I would suggest he (the Dane) start making a living will or draw up some legal paper work so that way the bitches of the east (SILs and MIL) can't become medical proxy or anything else that involves making decisions in his affairs. You can get the templates to make the necessary paper work online for free. I'll PM the link. Plenty of hugs and good vibes. :hug:

goldaries13
04-12-2009, 03:41 AM
Thanks, everyone. I guess the reason I'm so torn over this is because despite the lack of money, my family was and is tight, and wouldn't dream of trying to do anyone else in the family dirty. Having close contact with the Dane's family helped me realize this is not always the case with other families.

Another thing is probably my lack of really knowing how to deal with females. My siblings and half-siblings are all male, and a lot of my friends growing up were guys, so I have no idea how to deal with these psycho bitches. My mindset is hardwired on 'tell it like it is,' none of the 'girl games' BS that the MIL and SILs seem to play and know all too well. If I pulled half the crap they pull, my brothers would not hesitate to dislocate my jaw.

I should explain. In my world growing up, disagreements and feuds and such were settled in a throwdown. Whoever had the least bodily harm was the winner. I realize this is not the way all families solve their problems, but in this case, I kind of wish it was. Because then I could install spikes on my wheelchair wheels and grind their legs to mush. Just saying. :devil:

tropicsgoddess
04-12-2009, 04:50 AM
Another thing is probably my lack of really knowing how to deal with females. My siblings and half-siblings are all male, and a lot of my friends growing up were guys, so I have no idea how to deal with these psycho bitches. My mindset is hardwired on 'tell it like it is,' none of the 'girl games' BS that the MIL and SILs seem to play and know all too well. If I pulled half the crap they pull, my brothers would not hesitate to dislocate my jaw.

I should explain. In my world growing up, disagreements and feuds and such were settled in a throwdown. Whoever had the least bodily harm was the winner. I realize this is not the way all families solve their problems, but in this case, I kind of wish it was. Because then I could install spikes on my wheelchair wheels and grind their legs to mush. Just saying. :devil:

I grew up in a predominantly female environment (back in the day at home, it was me, my little sisters, mom and dad) and I had more girl than guy friends and also cousins and such. Bitchy women are about putting people into submission by intimidation or manipulating the crap out of people to get what they want. One big way bitchy women manipulate is with their emotions: they'll put on the whole martyr/try and make you feel or look like shit/waterworks type of deal. You owned their asses well, Golden with reaming out MIL and banning her and SILs from visiting The Dane at the hospital. I would love to see those bitches you're forced to call your MIL and SILs get clobbered along with a few people I know IRL that I won't metion their names.:devil:

Becks
04-12-2009, 04:59 AM
I could install spikes on my wheelchair wheels and grind their legs to mush. Just saying. :devil:

I think I have another girl crush. :love:

goldaries13
04-12-2009, 10:43 AM
I think I have another girl crush. :love:

Sad thing is, I've wanted to do that since I've had the wheelchair. My mother wouldn't let me when I lived with her because of costs (I found someone willing to do it, but it was expensive, about $300), and my husband won't let me because he's "worried about potential lawsuits." Bah! Bullocks to that, I say! Let them sue! If they're dumb enough to get in my way, they're too dumb to sue!

*rereads* Now I see why my mother says I have two personalities: The hippie-dippy flower child born too late, and Eleanor Abernathy. Cookies to those who know what I mean.

goldaries13
04-12-2009, 10:45 PM
Not much to report, except a phone call from one of my SILs I wanted to share.

SIL bitch from hell: GA13, I heard you and Mama had an argument yesterday.
Me: ...Your point?
SILBFH: Well, Mama said you banned her from the house. Don't you think that isolating my brother from his family would be detrimental to his health?
Me: *brain-to-mouth filter fizzles and dies* No, as a matter of fact, I think it will do wonders for his health not to be around you shrieking harpies. :doh:
SILBFH: What?!?!?!11?!
Me: *:shrug: well, we're already going to hell, let's go in style* You heard me. Right now he needs positive thoughts and positive people, and quite frankly, none of you qualify. And quite frankly, your mother's lucky I didn't go totally apeshit on her, because honestly, your mother is the type of woman who needs a kick to the crotch. Where I come from, women fight their own battles, not get their daughters to do it, or try and guilt their sons into it.
SILBFH: Well, I'm telling Mama to go ahead and take you to court! I was on your side before, but I'm not now!
Me: Please do. Tell that raging cunt harpy I'll be glad to see her in court. I'll even let everyone else in court do the laughing for me. And as for your support, I need it like I need a case of crabs. Good day. *click*

Okay, so maybe the 'raging cunt harpy' comment was out of line. I can't help but :roll: at their stupidity.

SengaKitty
04-12-2009, 10:50 PM
And quite frankly, your mother's lucky I didn't go totally apeshit on her, because honestly, your mother is the type of woman who needs a kick to the crotch.
...... (snip!)

Me: Please do. Tell that raging cunt harpy I'll be glad to see her in court. I'll even let everyone else in court do the laughing for me. And as for your support, I need it like I need a case of crabs. Good day. *click*

Okay, so maybe the 'raging cunt harpy' comment was out of line. I can't help but :roll: at their stupidity.

That was AWESOME :worship: I've thought about calling my MIL a raging cunt harpy and never had the nerve. You are now my hero.

Shpepper
04-13-2009, 12:16 AM
Not much to report, except a phone call from one of my SILs I wanted to share.

SIL bitch from hell: GA13, I heard you and Mama had an argument yesterday.
Me: ...Your point?
SILBFH: Well, Mama said you banned her from the house. Don't you think that isolating my brother from his family would be detrimental to his health?
Me: *brain-to-mouth filter fizzles and dies* No, as a matter of fact, I think it will do wonders for his health not to be around you shrieking harpies. :doh:
SILBFH: What?!?!?!11?!
Me: *:shrug: well, we're already going to hell, let's go in style* You heard me. Right now he needs positive thoughts and positive people, and quite frankly, none of you qualify. And quite frankly, your mother's lucky I didn't go totally apeshit on her, because honestly, your mother is the type of woman who needs a kick to the crotch. Where I come from, women fight their own battles, not get their daughters to do it, or try and guilt their sons into it.
SILBFH: Well, I'm telling Mama to go ahead and take you to court! I was on your side before, but I'm not now!
Me: Please do. Tell that raging cunt harpy I'll be glad to see her in court. I'll even let everyone else in court do the laughing for me. And as for your support, I need it like I need a case of crabs. Good day. *click*

Okay, so maybe the 'raging cunt harpy' comment was out of line. I can't help but :roll: at their stupidity.



BRAVO ! ! ! Well done.

Der Cute
04-13-2009, 01:13 AM
You pulled the MamaBear/LovingWife skill out of your magic bag, and gave it to her with both barrels.

Fine by me. Be short, to the point, and make it VERY clear about boundaries. Your job now is to make sure you and Hubby have shelter, food, hospital care. Anyone else coming into the picture is to help you get those 3 major things done. If they don't see that, they can go take a long walk offa short pier.

Maybe I can install some laser-guns to your wheelchair....start calling you Gunny. Hmm.. Ideas :).

Go take care of you and Dane, and remember: Shelter, Food, Hospital Care. Whiney shrews = Not Allowed.

Here's a choc chip cookie *hands cookie*, and Loves from my kitty Fuzzy.

We're here to hear you!

Cutenoob

tropicsgoddess
04-14-2009, 04:10 AM
GoldenAries, that was AWESOME how you told that bitch what for! :respect: :worship:

goldaries13
04-14-2009, 10:35 AM
Sorry I didn't post yesterday; much the good drama and I wanted to savor it.

First, on the legal front: The Dane and I are visiting a lawyer on Thursday, both to see our options on his mother's legal posturing, and get things in orders should something fuck up medically. I know, I know, but better safe than sorry.

Speaking of getting things in order, apparently the Dane has been hiding a safe deposit box on me. He explained it was a safety measure in case he died suddenly and his mother and sisters fucked me over. There's not much in it, other than a sizeable stack of emergency cash, and everything concerning the Dane's portion of his father's estate, but the Dane wants to make sure I'm taken care of; the way he put it, "Better that you sell property that you have no emotional attachment to than your family heirlooms." I hate when he takes the wind out of my sails like that: I was all ready to yell at him!

And finally, some really happy news: even though we've only been married a month and a half, the Dane wants us to renew our vows this summer, in front of family and friends (since the last ceremony was a five minute trip to city hall in our jeans). It'll take place at the house of a friend of ours, since this guy says he has a few acres he can spare. :)

This (http://www.debshops.com/product/index.jsp?productId=3506629&cp=3371585.3369418) is the dress we decided I should wear. What do you think?

Eireann
04-14-2009, 10:42 AM
I think it's stunning. It's beautiful, not at all gaudy, not overblown in any way, while saying "bride" to me.

Can I send you a card?

AdminAssistant
04-14-2009, 01:41 PM
Lovely dress!

I think it's very sweet that you're renewing your vows, and I'm really glad that you're seeing a lawyer.

Tireana Dorcha
04-14-2009, 02:16 PM
I know, I know, but better safe than sorry.

You don't even have to look at the legal stuff as you expecting the worst, so don't even try to beat yourself up for that ;). This is something every married couple should do, even if their MIL isn't a raving cunt harpy with a 2X4 shoved up her butt sideways. You should even make sure that you have your legal documents all taken care of at the same time, and evey couple of years or so, y'all two should go back over them to make sure they still cover everything you want it to and make changes as are appropriate.

And the dress is lovely! Make sure you send us pictures!:D

SengaKitty
04-14-2009, 02:21 PM
The dress is gorgeous! I'd love to send you a card as well :) I'm happy you guys are going to a lawyer, but even happier to hear of the renewal of vows :hug: Enjoy it my dear, enjoy it.

BTW, it sounds like you found a real catch in the Dane. I'm very glad you found each other, no matter what hapens.

AccountingDrone
04-14-2009, 02:45 PM
very spiffy, I love the beadwork. Should look good in a chair, draw the eyes up instead of to the chair. Dont forget to post wedding piccies =)

dalesys
04-14-2009, 03:46 PM
The dress is lovely.

I've always thought that the most beautiful part of a bridal dress was the stuffing.;)

morgana
04-14-2009, 05:54 PM
Last one in the pool, as usual, but I'll second everyone else's comments:

1. You rock.

2. The Dane doesn't need those medusa-clones, and neither do you.

3. Lawyer good, make sure bitches can't intervene.

4. The dress is lovely, and so will you be.

5. Him good catch, hang on to him.

Hang in there, kiddo, you're doing great.

wagegoth
04-14-2009, 07:14 PM
What Morgana said.


And the very best of wishes. You are both incredible people.

BookstoreEscapee
04-14-2009, 11:34 PM
Good for you!

The dress is beautiful. I approve :yes:

Good luck with everything. :)

Irving Patrick Freleigh
04-14-2009, 11:44 PM
This (http://www.debshops.com/product/index.jsp?productId=3506629&cp=3371585.3369418) is the dress we decided I should wear. What do you think?

I like, I like!

tropicsgoddess
04-15-2009, 04:21 AM
Beautiful dress! Good move on getting a lawyer to do the legal stuff so the bitches-in-laws don't screw you and the Dane over.

Dytchdoctir
04-15-2009, 01:57 PM
First:

You'll look your beautiful best in that dress! Will you post wedding pics? Please? Pretty please???!!!

Second:

This might amuse you; it's a story of a clueless MIL and the TITANIC wedding dress disaster.

http://www.etiquettehell.com/content/eh_wedding/humor/etitanic.shtml

http://www.cleverdivas.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/08/titanicdressdinnerbluerose.jpg

Third:

Awesome pwnage!!! :roll::roll::roll:

And I thought my MIL was an a**h**e!

Our first meeting:

DD: Hello, I'm Dytchdoctir.

MIL: (in Spanish) Look, this dirty gringo wants to shake my hand!

DD: :( :pissed: :devil: (in Spanish) And I speak Spanish.

goldaries13
04-15-2009, 02:29 PM
Hi guys,

thanks for the kind words. Fuuny story about the dress:

The Dane: Maybe you should get something in all white. I mean, that black design... Are You sure?
Me: Oh, sweetie... Need I remind you everyone on my side is from the south? If I wore an all white dress, they would snicker at the implication.

We're still deciding on bridemaids' dresses. Nothing too hideous or neon, which is all we've been running into. I just can't see subjecting my closest female friends to something like this (http://www.debshops.com/product/index.jsp?productId=3378359&cp=3371585.3369418)(too many ruffles. I may be from the south, but that's just ridiculous), or this (http://www.debshops.com/product/index.jsp?productId=3378386&cp=3371585.3369419)(hideous color alert!)

Any suggestions?

SengaKitty
04-15-2009, 02:39 PM
How about a tastefull soft grey or lavender sheath dress?

ETA: Something like this (http://www.nexteve.com/images/D/F6294a.jpg) or Pick (http://myitthings.com/Fabuless/Post/fashion/It-Thing/Go-Glam-in-Evening-Gowns/733192008153919752.htm) your style, and see if a store or seamstress can do it for you in the size and colour you want.

XCashier
04-15-2009, 09:41 PM
This might amuse you; it's a story of a clueless MIL and the TITANIC wedding dress disaster.

http://www.etiquettehell.com/content/eh_wedding/humor/etitanic.shtml
I just finished reading that story. I don't know if that was a MIL From Hell, or just someone who way overestimated their abilities. That dress...YIKES!!!
And I thought my MIL was an a**h**e!

Our first meeting:

DD: Hello, I'm Dytchdoctir.

MIL: (in Spanish) Look, this dirty gringo wants to shake my hand!

DD: :( :pissed: :devil: (in Spanish) And I speak Spanish.
:lol: Did she give you the patented Cat Butt Face™ when you said that? :devil:

Back OT, goldaries13, you have picked a beautiful dress. And you're doing the right thing, getting the lawyer to iron out the details. Here's to your Happily Ever After! :cheers:

BookstoreEscapee
04-15-2009, 11:34 PM
The blue dress isn't a bad color, but yeah, that's a lotta ruffles. Neon orange? No. (Besides, orange and yellow are hard to pull off if you don't have the right skin tone. They make me look ill when I wear them. So they're a little dangerous for bridesmaid dresses, unless all your maids are of similar skin tone.) I was at the mall a couple weeks ago and passed the Deb store, and they had all the prom dresses out. Oh my dog the hideous colors! Bright, bright green, orange, blue...it was like the neon '80s all over again. What the hell?

One of my friends had her maids in separates (actually, her wedding dress was two pieces, too, and came with matching pants!). They all had the same skirt, and they each picked the top that worked best on their figure. Another friend had long periwinkle-blue satin skirts and blue v-neck cashmere sweaters (which she bought them as part of their bridesmaid gift) (her wedding was in September, outside, on the water in Rhode Island so cashmere was a good pick).

goldaries13
04-15-2009, 11:36 PM
<snip> it was like the neon '80s all over again. What the hell?

Doncha know? Everything 80s is, like, so in! Ohmigod!!

Sorry, couldn't resist.

BookstoreEscapee
04-15-2009, 11:41 PM
Doncha know? Everything 80s is, like, so in! Ohmigod!!

Sorry, couldn't resist.

Gag me with a spoon...

Shpepper
04-16-2009, 03:29 AM
You might think about choosing a color and letting your bridesmaids pick their own dresses. Give them a swatch to match and let them pick one that looks best on them. If you want final approval, have them email you pictures before purchasing them.

CaroPhoenix
04-16-2009, 12:14 PM
You might think about choosing a color and letting your bridesmaids pick their own dresses. Give them a swatch to match and let them pick one that looks best on them. If you want final approval, have them email you pictures before purchasing them.



That's what my ex-best friend's sister did for her brides maids and Maid of Honor. They all looked really nice, and they chose dresses they could wear again if they so chose.

AdminAssistant
04-16-2009, 03:29 PM
Doncha know? Everything 80s is, like, so in! Ohmigod!!

Does that mean that in a few years we'll be back in baggy jeans, flannel shirts, and Docs with unwashed hair in our faces listening to Nirvana??

(Letting them pick their own dress within a color scheme is a great idea, IMO.)

Irving Patrick Freleigh
04-16-2009, 03:41 PM
Does that mean that in a few years we'll be back in baggy jeans, flannel shirts, and Docs with unwashed hair in our faces listening to Nirvana??



I'm still waiting for the first wave of Kurt Cobain impersonators to hit the scene. :(

goldaries13
04-17-2009, 09:17 AM
Today's the day. His first radiation appointment.

We visited a lawyer yesterday. His mother legally has no standing if she tries to become his medical proxy, so all she'd be doing if she tried is essentially wasting time and money. Everything in terms of The Dane's living will, his will, and other legal wrangling is all set.

Now, for a rant. The background for the rant is thus: The Dane and I are attending a fairly large university in central New York. We do interact with other students, but quite frankly, we don't hang out as such because these people don't seem to have moved past the 'drinking till you pass out is fun' stage.

I was at one of the college libraries the other day when one of these people came up to me. If she had simply said, 'sorry to hear about The Dane, hope he gets better,' and move on, I wouldn't be ranting about it.

Fuckwit: Hey, Gold! How's it going?
Me: Meh, good and bad.
FW: I heard about The Dane. He was such a good guy...
Me: Uh, :wtf: He's still very much alive.
FW: Yeah, but he had brain surgery, right? Doesn't that... change things?
me: ...:pissed:
FW: I mean, I'm sure [university] will give him his degree anyway, since the bulk of his coursework took place before...
Me: Are you trying to ask me if my husband's...
FW: *cutting in* Retarded. Wouldn't that invalidate your marriage, too?
Me: :pissed: :rant: How dare you? You know what, you're sick. Coming over here, acting like my friend and that you're concerned, when all you wanted was to satisfy some sick curiosity... What the fuck is wrong with you?

I ran off before she could say anything. I mean, honestly? How sick is that?

RootedPhoenix
04-17-2009, 11:30 AM
I....:burnup:
*offers chocolate* People like that are sick. I'm sorry you had to put up with that.

Ree
04-17-2009, 11:33 AM
Sorry I didn't see this until now.

:hugs:

We are here for you.

Bliss
04-17-2009, 12:38 PM
Me: Are you trying to ask me if my husband's...
FW: *cutting in* Retarded. Wouldn't that invalidate your marriage, too?

Projecting much lady?

goldaries13
04-17-2009, 12:47 PM
Projecting much lady?

I have to admit, this made me giggle.

XCashier
04-17-2009, 02:52 PM
Projecting much lady?
I think you nailed it.

What a stupid airhead. I hope she was properly embarrassed and learns to think before she speaks. Maybe... :pigfly:

tropicsgoddess
04-17-2009, 03:24 PM
Wow, talk about a serious brain-to-mouth filter malfunction with that chick. :burnup:

Bliss
04-17-2009, 07:18 PM
I have to admit, this made me giggle.

:) I am glad, that was my intention. I didn't offer hugs since I normally think there is nothing I can say that would fix things. But I did this because I know the fight that comes is hard and you guys need to remember what you're fighting for to get over it with success. Stuff like your love, cool summer breezes and laughing.

goldaries13
04-17-2009, 09:13 PM
His radiation appointment went okay (I can hear the groans already. "of course it went okay, it's his first appointment!" but I worry). The team warned us that in the coming weeks The Dane may have sores and ulcers in his mouth and throat and that he'll be tired and possibly nauseous.

I, personally, can't wait for the next two weeks to be over and done with, because then school will be over and then The Dane can just rest. He had class after his radiation treatment and he said he was starting to feel a little sick. :( He really thought about skipping but the professor is a bitch. His next appointment is either Monday or Tuesday, I forget which.

Der Cute
04-17-2009, 09:53 PM
I'm glad you gave the WhatFor to that woman. Gah!! And I'm glad you've been to the lawyer and got your ducks in a row. Good on you. Now, it's treat the Evil Thing and hope it learns You Don't Want It.

Hugs to both of you - you need it. Want some fudge too? *fudge and cookies and kitty loves*

Cutenoob

Broomjockey
04-17-2009, 10:12 PM
Worrying is normal, don't feel bad about it. Actually, you shouldn't feel bad about *anything* you've done in this thread.

Worrying? You love him, you'll worry no matter what.

That twit in the library? Obviously been drinking too hard. Surprised she managed to dress herself.

Calling the SIL names? Calling it as it is.

Tossing the MIL out? completely necessary. Not all parents are good ones, In-laws or not. Some are destructive. I'd relate some tales, but I doubt it's needed. Getting a bad influence out of your life and out of his is an excellent thing, and will only improve matters.

Just remember that you've got support here, and we love it when people get what's coming to them, so if you need to vent more, have at it :devil: Good luck in the coming days :D

Cia
04-18-2009, 09:22 AM
A raving cunt harpy was probably one of the nicer things you could say about your MIL. I could just see the judge quizzing your MIL:

Judge: Where do you live?
MIL: Denmark.
Judge: Where does your son and DIL live.
MIL: The US.
Judge: Case dismissed.

Do you think the Dane would get upset if his mother and sisters were shipped back to Denmark in a metal shipping container?

I bet that fellow university student of yours falls down alot since her foot is shoved so far down her throat it's poking out her ass.

For my wedding my MOH and bridesmaid wore dresses with black bodices and gunmetal skirts. Or you could go with dresses that are a negative to yours - black with white trim.

goldaries13
04-18-2009, 11:11 AM
:roll: I love you guys. Always with the quick wit.

The Dane is doing alright today. Still some lingering nausea. He has apparently taken it upon himself to drink all my decaf green tea because it's the only thing that settles his stomach(well, that and soup, but he's feeling lazy today). :rolleyes:

My brothers and half-brothers have all made plans to drop by in the coming weeks. Mostly so that someone will always be able to drive the Dane to and from his appointments. That, and apparently this is like a vacation for them. For those that are counting, that's 5 brothers, 2 half-brothers, 3 wives, 2 common law wives, 2 girlfriends, 15 children, and 8 or 9 giant SUVs.

:headscratch: :shrug:

What can I say? The first thing my family is likely to say in a crisis is, "All y'all! Pack your stuff and be in the damn car in fifteen minutes! We gotta go help <whatever relative has dropped off into hell>!"

SengaKitty
04-18-2009, 12:10 PM
What can I say? The first thing my family is likely to say in a crisis is, "All y'all! Pack your stuff and be in the damn car in fifteen minutes! We gotta go help <whatever relative has dropped off into hell>!"


All I can say, my dear, is you have an awesome family behind you. It sounds like they actually care about each other, which is more than can be said for The Dane's family. I'm really glad to hear they're going to be there for you and The Dane.

You're still in my thoughts and prayers, and I'm keeping a candle lit for all of you.

Oh, and a tip for the radiation? (My Dad had radiation for throat cancer), Keep lots of water around too. Anything the Dane can drink and keep down that with ease the sores. It'll be hard for him to drink cokes and things likely. I don't want to scare you, but be prepared for a feeding tube. The radiation can burn the throat so badly that they won't be able to swallow. This is not a bad thing, or a permanent one, just a side effect of killing That Evil Thing.

We're here for you honey! :hug:

Akasa
04-18-2009, 12:35 PM
I'm so sorry I haven't been to the site for a few days.(I've been ill.)
Good on you for taking a stand on your husband's well being!
You will look lovely in that dress.
I'm glad the treatments have started already.
Its after 2:30 am and my ambien is just now kicking in.

XCashier
04-18-2009, 03:45 PM
The first thing my family is likely to say in a crisis is, "All y'all! Pack your stuff and be in the damn car in fifteen minutes! We gotta go help <whatever relative has dropped off into hell>!"
:super: Now THAT'S the kind of family to have! Your own personal army! :lol:

Seriously, sounds like you've got a great family and lots of backup. Always good to have in your life.

Wishing the Dane the best of luck and a speedy recovery from the cancer.

Bella_Vixen
04-18-2009, 07:59 PM
What can I say? The first thing my family is likely to say in a crisis is, "All y'all! Pack your stuff and be in the damn car in fifteen minutes! We gotta go help <whatever relative has dropped off into hell>!"



This is pretty much what my fam was going to do for Becks if she didn't move back home, and she would have wanted to. Even Cheating Manwhore Of An Ex was willing (when we were dating) to join in on the fun.

goldaries13
04-19-2009, 04:44 PM
Not a lot to say, First of the brothers came up. The Dane is still sick. His mother's still a bitch.

*sigh* It actually feels normal today, and I am beside myself a bit. I haven't been in crisis mode for very long, but it seems very much the norm now. Am I losing it? Should I go book a stay at the funny farm?

BookstoreEscapee
04-19-2009, 06:27 PM
*sigh* It actually feels normal today, and I am beside myself a bit. I haven't been in crisis mode for very long, but it seems very much the norm now. Am I losing it? Should I go book a stay at the funny farm?

Nope. Even a crisis become "normal" when it goes on long enough. If you stayed in "fight or flight" mode all the time you'd be useless. Your body/mind are learning to cope with the stress. It's a good thing. :hug:

goldaries13
04-20-2009, 11:10 AM
Well, the Dane has done it again.

Made me show my support for his battle, that is. He's been depressed because they had to shave off his hair for the surgery, and there's a small chance with the radiation that it won't grow back.

So what did I do? I chopped off most of my hair. Picture 1 is the before, the last two are the after: 2 is w/ bangs on forehead, 3 is bangs off the forehead. Excuse the crap quality.

PepperElf
04-20-2009, 11:45 AM
nice haircut :)

am growing mine out at the moment (planning to donate).

and the dress from debs looks beautiful :)
that's where we got the bridesmaid dresses for my sister's wedding.

:hug: for you and the Dane

SengaKitty
04-20-2009, 03:52 PM
Love the new haircut hon, it looks really good on you :) Hugs to you and the Dane. Just remember, you're not strange for feeling like things are "normal" right now. You have to feel this way, or you'll go crazy. We're all praying and sending good thoughts.

Shpepper
04-21-2009, 12:28 AM
WOW you look fantastic. I love the new 'do.

goldaries13
04-21-2009, 10:31 PM
Another radiation treatment today, apparently the schedule is Monday, Tuesday, Thursday, and Friday. The team discussed the possibility of a feeding tube, and the Dane thinks it will happen sooner rather than later, as it's already hard for him to swallow solid food. Most days he just has tea and occasionally eats some soup.

Chaos has reigned supreme: on the work front, I'm pulling overtime to make sure the bills are covered, all while the electronics department is undergoing major changes(apparently the dept. layout is too confusing, so things are being switched around and everything is all willynilly for the time being). On the school front, I have four or five finals coming up, as well as two cases studies (one for adolescent psych, one for anatomy) and a creative writing portfolio due. Everyone here is already well aware of the home front. And on the personal life front, I have none. :p

I'm chugging espresso to keep going, but I think if I have another shot, my heart will explode.

TTAZ
04-22-2009, 01:19 AM
Can the Dane do milkshakes? Mix an instant breakfast or other type of nutritional supplement in it and he's getting vitamins as well as a nice, cool, liquid meal.

A trick I learned when my grandmother was going through radiation.

goldaries13
04-23-2009, 06:33 PM
I hate my mother in law.

After almost a week of silence, a week of peace, it called. It wanted to speak to the Dane, who was half sipping on a milkshake, and half sleeping on the couch (don't ask me, he's been able to do that since before I met him).

Me: No.
MIL: What?!?! He's my son!!!eleventy!!!
Me: And we both told you to go away. Therefore, your excuse is no longer applicable.
MIL: Who the hell do you think you are?
Me: :devil: MIL, do you really want me to answer that question?
MIL: You little bitch-
Me: Because honestly, I think- and feel free to disagree here- that I'm his wife. Oh, and don't pull that "he's still my child" because you forfeited that when you disregarded his welfare. He's told you himself that he's no longer your son. Now, kindly either finish suing us, or rather start suing us, or go away. *click*

Thankfully, she's leaving tomorrow, and since she refuses to pay the however-much-a-minute it is to call us, the calling will cease! :party: :muya:

tropicsgoddess
04-23-2009, 07:45 PM
GoldenAries, that was THE best ownage on the bitch-in-law EVER!! :highfive: Let's break out some bubbly/sparkling cider to celebrate the bitch-in-law's departure. :party:

CaroPhoenix
04-23-2009, 08:18 PM
I need you to teach my oh great one at owning a MIL ever. I need to start doing that with my MIL concerning my daghter. Please, please teach me! :)

:hug:

Give The Dane my well wishes too!

Mikkel
04-23-2009, 09:11 PM
Tell the Dane 'god bedring' from me :wave:.
As for going to Denmark and getting a proper treatment, try reading this (http://ekstrabladet.dk/kup/sundhed/article998510.ece). Before our damned government began cutting expenses and reducing taxes we had a healthcare system to be proud of, and free for everyone too (except for taxes :D).
And please don't send that woman back to Denmark :eek:, someday she might come to my shop. Maybe she could get out of the plane and walk somewhere around Greenland...

goldaries13
04-23-2009, 09:32 PM
And please don't send that woman back to Denmark :eek:, someday she might come to my shop. Maybe she could get out of the plane and walk somewhere around Greenland...

Well, maybe she should get off in Greenland. I don't think you have to worry, though. I think the bitch still lives in Vejle, which is quite a distance from you (if I remember what the Dane told me, which I don't :o). Still, I would invest in getting some holy water, a cross, garlic, and maybe a little rock salt to pour across the shop's doorway.

I, personally, have decided that Siberia would be a lovely place for her to go. Or perhaps Antarctica?

SengaKitty
04-23-2009, 09:43 PM
I, personally, have decided that Siberia would be a lovely place for her to go. Or perhaps Antarctica?

But why would you torture the penguins like that???

Great ownage by the way :D

wagegoth
04-23-2009, 11:40 PM
Definitely, the Arctic. The polar bears will eat anything.

dendawg
04-24-2009, 02:47 AM
I've come to a conclusion:

Dane's mom just might be living proof that something rotten really is in Denmark. :angel:

Sliceanddice
04-24-2009, 05:47 AM
ok first my preyers are with you, get the doctor and read it with your husband, trust me you'll understand. second THIS (http://www.debshops.com/product/index.jsp?productId=3480693&cp=3371579.3364605) would be nice brides maids dress.
third i know shes a bitch but i want you to concider one thing, (AND NO I DONT WANT YOU TO CHANGE YOUR COURSE OF ACTION AT ALL ON THE MIL FRONT!) her husband died form brain cancer. your son has a brain cancer. part of her may be flashing back to watching her husband die. so.... hate her, dismiss her, ban her, disown her. but remember she could be hurting too.

Becks
04-24-2009, 05:17 PM
*hugs all around* except for the evil MIL, who needs to just spontaneously combust out in the middle of nowhere.

goldaries13
04-28-2009, 02:50 AM
Today children, I'm going to tell you a story. A story about the worst RAGING CUNT HARPY BITCH that ever lived.

You know what, screw that. I'll just cut to the chase. My SIL has now taken the place of MIL on my 'people to poison' list(I have three lists, and that one is the worst, but that's another story for another day). This is the first SIL, The Dane's eldest sister.

She has decided, in her infinite wisdom, to start harassing my family members and telling them I am killing her brother, and so are they by extension. How are we killing him? By denying him access to his family members. Never mind he doesn't want to see them.

Half-brother #1, "Lee," who was the first to come up to New York, finally got sick of it and went to SIL's house with a baseball bat. Lee is a rather large man, and very fit, so I can understand why the mere sight of him eyeing her windows and tapping the baseball bat on the ground caused her to piss her pants (so Lee says). That's all he did, by the way. No smashee of the windows or SIL's skull.

I've tried to be understanding, guys, I really have. I know The Dane's father died of a brain tumor and they are projecting and reacting and whatever other psychological defense mechanism terms you want to come up with, but I'm sick of it. So, a letter to those women:


To my MIL and SILS:

HE DOESN'T WANT TO SEE YOU, YOU DUMB STUPID HARPY BITCHES! His reasons are his own, but it has nothing to do with how I feel about you personally. Quite frankly, I'm happy to ignore you and pretend you don't exist, like you do with me most of the time. I ignore you, you ignore me, everyone's happy.

Just... Stop it. It is not my doing. Maybe you ought to look at yourselves and wonder what it is the Dane doesn't want to see. Just a thought.

Ladies, I only have sex with your son/brother. This doesn't give me any mindreading powers, and it sure as hell don't make me the devil.

Please keep that in mind, and stop the hate campaign against me. Because really, the more you do this, the more he ignores you, and the more he gets edgy and bitchy, and that means less sex for me. That makes me hate you more.

In conclusion, shut up, because I really want to have sex with The Dane again.

No love,
Me

...I feel much better. :lol:

Irving Patrick Freleigh
04-28-2009, 02:59 AM
:wtf:-a-thon of the year right here.

RootedPhoenix
04-28-2009, 03:07 AM
*does a facepalm marathon*

I seriously do not get why they are acting this way. I'm sending you and the Dane good thoughts.

Der Cute
04-28-2009, 03:55 AM
Sounds like someone fed them Buttheaderon in their childhoods.

I'm sorry the family is being...charpy. (cuntharpy). Sometimes when death stares a person in the face, they will stop being charpies and start behaving. Sounds like this family's doctor upped the Buttheaderon dosage instead. At least my mother isn't being as charpy as she used to be. (don't ask)

*hugs and chocolate chip cookies and kitty bonks*

Cutenoob

Kagato
04-30-2009, 09:08 AM
*Rigs up the fleet of buses at the depot that he works at MacGuyver style to a remote control system, then directs the entire fleet at the SIL's and MIL from hell so that they all run them over one at a time in rapid succession*

I've said it before, and I'll say it again. I'm the BUS DRIVER OF DOOM! All shall fear my 10 wheels of WRATH... (Or rather anyone that happens to be on my bus route...) :devil:

That being said though, I'm wishing I would remember to poke my head in more often so I could have offered my support much sooner than now :-/ Spent a good half an hour or so going back through the 11 pages worth of replies. Hope The Dane is doing well, my thoughts be with the both of you, and I put up a message on a couple of prayer boards I poke my head into from time to time to ask them to give a prayer towards his being kept safe, and a fast road to recovery (as close to full recovery as possible) :hug:

Comment about the insensitive uni student in an earlier page: She was projecting so hard she could point herself at a wall and show off power-point presentations >_<

And lastly, a VERY big :yourock: for the EPIC level of ownage you have shown to the harpies... erm... I mean the in-laws several times over, can't think of anyone more deserving of your wrath (Seriously, when I read that the MIL wanted him to drive her to the airport in his condition... if I was in your shoes she probably wouldn't have been able to board her plane as she'd probably be in a hospital bed - *is VERY protective of loved ones and relatives* )

goldaries13
04-30-2009, 09:13 PM
*sigh* Today was a good day, which we don't seem to have too many of anymore. The Dane went to his radiation treatment, we both went to class, and things felt rather normal. The Dane managed to eat a Arby's melt and some curly fries when we went to grab lunch today (which is a small victory since he's had trouble eating anything solid since the radiation started, so this is good).

As I mentioned in an earlier post, my half-brother Lee is in town with his wife. My other brothers will be up as soon as school lets out for their kids, anywhere to a week to three weeks from now. Lee, his wife Jess, and Mom have been taking turns taking the Dane to his appointments. I really don't know what I'd do if the Dane and I had no support.

School ends for the Dane in a week, and for me in a week and a half (darn pesky finals). After that, we're going to relax.

goldaries13
05-04-2009, 08:23 PM
As you can probably tell, we have hit a new low in this WTF-athon. This morning, as the Dane and I were *ahem* relaxing him for the upcoming radiation treatment :o, the cops showed up. Apparently, someone left a note in Danish on one of the SILs' doorsteps, and apparently there were 'threats' on the note. The cops were polite to us, especially after I told them only the Dane knows the language fluently in the household, and the only Danish I know is... well, the pastry.

That's right, six years of being with the Dane(and three years of living with him) has taught me nothing. For all I know, that man is calling me 'the monumental bitch goddess from hell' instead of 'doll,' like he claims.

I don't think they wrote the note themselves. I don't think this is some crazed plot to get back at me. Those bitches have pissed off a lot of people, and most of those people speak enough Danish to threaten them. Myself, I prefer to key a naughty word on their cars in English if I were to do that sort of thing.

Becks
05-05-2009, 04:41 AM
This thread is so :popcorn: worthy.

CaroPhoenix
05-05-2009, 11:45 AM
This thread is so :popcorn: worthy.

I'm so with you there Becks!

Hand over some of that :popcorn:!

As for the In-Laws. I feel for you. I hope a silver lining comes your way soon!

Sliceanddice
05-05-2009, 01:05 PM
This thread is so :popcorn: worthy.

so with you
this tread alone could be a soap opera

goldaries13
05-08-2009, 06:50 PM
*sigh* Nothing to report on the WTF-a-thon. The Dane has been eating small amounts of solid food regularly. He did have a minor seizure yesterday, but thankfully there were other people in the house at the time (Mom, Lee, and Jess), so he's alright.

I did see one of the SILs yesterday, but she wisely decided to stay away.

My life is a soap opera right now. The only way it could be any more of a soap opera would be if I was pregnant.

Der Cute
05-08-2009, 07:45 PM
As the WTF-athon Turns.

:)

Glad you're keeping a positive look here. Humor is a good tool.

*big squishy hugs with chocolate*

Cutenoob

telecom_goddess
05-08-2009, 07:49 PM
Good luck with that...he's lucky and you are too that you have people that come over and help and show support. It sucks when you end up in a hospital and no one comes to see you :cry:

tropicsgoddess
05-08-2009, 08:56 PM
Becks, IDaR and Slice, I completely agree how :popcorn: worthy this thread is, pass me some popcorn too! GoldenAries, I'm happy the Dane is getting better with his radiation and that you were able to "relax" him before his appointment. "Relaxing" sure does wonders for the body and soul. :p I've taught SO a few words in my native language Dutch and one in particular my dad taught him too that SO likes. A few years ago SO went and setup the wireless network in my parents' house and when he was done, my dad asked him what the bill was for the work and told SO that the Dutch word bil (say: bill) means butt. SO says "you mean this bil?" and smacks my butt right in front of my dad, but it was in humor and we all had a good laugh about it (both of us and my dad). :lol:

goldaries13
05-15-2009, 09:07 PM
And now, a rant:

While the Dane and I were looking at new apartments today(due to Fuckwit Stalker (http://www.customerssuck.com/board/showthread.php?t=47577)), I got to thinking.

When I was back in Alabama living with Mom and I only got to see the Dane on weekends when he drove up from uni, the SILs all lived in different states: I believe the oldest lived in California, the youngest lived in New Mexico, and the other two lived in Montana. In other words, all of them lived at least a thousand miles away.

After The Dane and I moved to New York, within 6 months, all of them had moved to New York, as well. In the very same city where we lived.

What. The. FUCK?! Now, I understand wanting to be near family. All my brothers as well as my mother have expressed the idea of moving to New York at one time or another, but have decided against it. Something about not wanting to turn into sissy Northerners. :lol: No offense to Northerners.

The more I thought about this, the more it irritated me. What is wrong with them?! Why is it, when we were only dating, I was a saint(mostly), and even when we were just living together, I was tolerable. But now that we're married, I am Satan and must be stopped?!

One of the SILs actually told The Dane (shortly before he cut off contact) that she hoped he never had children with me, because "she's not our kind." :pissed: If we do have children (we were discussing it before all this shit happened, and we have started tentatively discussing it again in terms of a year or so from now), it's none of their business. God, I hate these people!

On the positive side, we think we have found the perfect apartment: wheelchair accessible, a short drive to the hospital, and two bedrooms, one of which can serve as a guest bedroom(or, you know, a child's room should we decide to). It's about twice as big as the one where we live now.

School is finally over, so The Dane has taken to sleeping for a good deal of the day. He's eating somewhat normally now. He says he's bored with not a lot to do, so he's taken to browsing CS(Hubsy, if you're reading this: get your own account before you thoughtlessly post as me. Love you!).

*sigh* The wedding is almost all set, it's just those damn bridesmaids. I found one dress (http://www.debshops.com/product/index.jsp?productId=3378367&cp=3371585.3369418) I liked, but it seems that I have a distinct lack of female friends. :doh: However, a quick email to all the listserves for the school organizations I'm a member of has helped to unearth some willing souls. One of my best friends from back in Alabama is willing to be my maid of honor, even though we lost touch after graduation (her words in the email she sent: "Damn it, girly! You remember what I said: If you ever get hitched to that Nordic idiot, I have first dibs for the maid of honor position!" :roll:).

Ah, chaos... I have not missed you. Please go away.

Andara Bledin
05-15-2009, 10:53 PM
Dress wise, have you checked out simplydresses.com?

They seem a bit more expensive, but they have some really nice-looking dresses.

^-.-^

BookstoreEscapee
05-16-2009, 01:08 AM
"she's not our kind."

"No, she's not a raging, vindictive bitch. Definitely not your kind." :yes:

The_Dane
05-16-2009, 02:09 AM
(Hubsy, if you're reading this: get your own account before you thoughtlessly post as me. Love you!)

Yes, dear.

tropicsgoddess
05-16-2009, 02:18 AM
Dress wise, have you checked out simplydresses.com?

They seem a bit more expensive, but they have some really nice-looking dresses.

^-.-^

Ooh, they have some nice dresses there! I'm bookmarking it for when SO and I get married. :D

"No, she's not a raging, vindictive bitch. Definitely not your kind." :yes:

I agree. Bitch In Law can sit on it and rotate! http://www.planetsmilies.com/smilies/mad/mad0057.gif. To the Bitch In-Law: Fuck you and the broom you rode on.

BookstoreEscapee
05-16-2009, 03:27 AM
I agree. Bitch In Law can sit on it and rotate! http://www.planetsmilies.com/smilies/mad/mad0057.gif. To the Bitch In-Law: Fuck you and the broom you rode on.

I giggle at your smiley. :p

SengaKitty
05-16-2009, 03:37 AM
Oh Aries I LOVE that dress! Great choice hon! As far as the inlaws.. Well honey, all I can say is I didn't think they could get much worse than mine.. Boy was I wrong. You're stronger than I! :hug:

goldaries13
05-16-2009, 06:53 AM
Yes, dear.

See how well trained he is, everyone? :rotflmao:

tropicsgoddess
05-16-2009, 03:13 PM
Yes, dear.

Welcome to CS.com Dane! :wave:

See how well trained he is, everyone? :rotflmao:

Sure do! :lol:

SengaKitty
05-16-2009, 03:48 PM
Hi The_Dane! Welcome to CS :) We've heard all sorts of good stuff about you :)

cactus
05-16-2009, 05:37 PM
Yay, a Dane! God dag og velkommen ;)

I know I'm not the most active poster here (but I do read a LOT) but I'm keeping you in my thoughts/prayers...

Becks
05-16-2009, 05:59 PM
See how well trained he is, everyone? :rotflmao:

Yes. I'm proud. :angel:

(Can I be yours and his fangirl? Please?)

The_Dane
05-16-2009, 06:33 PM
Yes. I'm proud. :angel:

(Can I be yours and his fangirl? Please?)

Well, I may be speaking without approval of the *ahem* management, but I suppose I'll accept fangirls.

But yes, I do exist. :wave:

BookstoreEscapee
05-16-2009, 06:56 PM
Well, I may be speaking without approval of the *ahem* management, but I suppose I'll accept fangirls.

But yes, I do exist. :wave:

We knew you did. :welcome:

I follow Becks everywhere so can I be a fangirl too? :p

SengaKitty
05-16-2009, 06:59 PM
so can I be a fangirl too? :p

And me? Please? Pretty please?

The_Dane
05-16-2009, 07:27 PM
Why is it I'm only popular with females on the internet? Yes, yes, you can all be my fangirls.

BookstoreEscapee
05-16-2009, 07:28 PM
Why is it I'm only popular with females on the internet? Yes, yes, you can all be my fangirls.

You want fanboys? I'm sure there are a few around here who wouldn't mind. :D

The_Dane
05-16-2009, 07:32 PM
You want fanboys? I'm sure there are a few around here who wouldn't mind. :D

No, I simply meant why is it in the real world, before I was married, I couldn't get a date to save my life. Hell, GoldAries was the one who made the first move. Which surprised me, considering our first meeting.

But now that I am married, and even before, women on the internet have always found me interesting. Of course, now that I'm married, all women, everywhere, find me fascinating. :wtf:

BookstoreEscapee
05-16-2009, 07:33 PM
No, I simply meant why is it in the real world, before I was married, I couldn't get a date to save my life. Hell, GoldAries was the one who made the first move. Which surprised me, considering our first meeting.

But now that I am married, and even before, women on the internet have always found me interesting. Of course, now that I'm married, all women, everywhere, find me fascinating. :wtf:

It's just the way it works, my friend.

The_Dane
05-16-2009, 07:39 PM
It's just the way it works, my friend.

Apparently. It's a little disappointing for my ego, not that I would change anything in my life. GoldAries is one of the most interesting women I've encountered, and if I tried to imagine a life without her, I probably wouldn't like it.

Mikkel
05-16-2009, 07:43 PM
You want fanboys? I'm sure there are a few around here who wouldn't mind. :D

Well...
:angel:

men velkommen ombord :wave:.

Should you want stories from Denmark as a change of pace you could try www.haderkunder.dk, this Danish sister site is neither as good, as well moderated or as busy but you may find some good tales there too.

BookstoreEscapee
05-16-2009, 08:12 PM
Apparently. It's a little disappointing for my ego, not that I would change anything in my life. GoldAries is one of the most interesting women I've encountered, and if I tried to imagine a life without her, I probably wouldn't like it.

Well, from what I've seen of her here, I'd say you got a good one.

Theory: When you are happy in a relationship you are more relaxed around the opposite sex because you aren't looking for or expecting anything. Therefore you don't give off any awkward/desperate vibes and people are more drawn to you.

The_Dane
05-16-2009, 09:48 PM
Well, from what I've seen of her here, I'd say you got a good one.

Theory: When you are happy in a relationship you are more relaxed around the opposite sex because you aren't looking for or expecting anything. Therefore you don't give off any awkward/desperate vibes and people are more drawn to you.

It figures.

goldaries13
05-16-2009, 09:52 PM
Well, I may be speaking without approval of the *ahem* management

Speaking without permission again? That's another week in the basement for you! ;) :roll:

But I suppose I can allow a few fangirls. Nobody too crazy. Eh, screw it, the crazier the better.

SengaKitty
05-16-2009, 10:18 PM
Speaking without permission again? That's another week in the basement for you! ;) :roll:


Wow I didn't know you guys were like that! Maybe ya'll should vacation here and we could hang out ;) :devil: :roll:

The_Dane
05-16-2009, 10:26 PM
Speaking without permission again? That's another week in the basement for you! ;) :roll:

Yes, Mistress. :lol:

Wow I didn't know you guys were like that! Maybe ya'll should vacation here and we could hang out ;) :devil: :roll:

We're an odd pair. People hear us saying this stuff and assume we're weirdos. It's one those 'couple humor' things that people don't get.

Although, what happens behind closed doors... ;) *ahem* Moving on!

SengaKitty
05-17-2009, 02:38 AM
Yes, Mistress. :lol:


Now I really think we should hang out :p

BethB
05-17-2009, 06:09 AM
See how well trained he is, everyone? :rotflmao:

How does one "train" a hubby?! Mine's still disobedient. I should stop talking about my husband like he's a puppy(though he does follow me around alot:lol:).

Nyoibo
05-17-2009, 03:51 PM
How does one "train" a hubby?

A rolled up newspaper and a spray bottle?

Tireana Dorcha
05-17-2009, 05:48 PM
I'm a little late on this, but: Yay! Hello The Dane! :wave::wave:

And the last two pages of this has had me laughing histarically...the people at work must think me nuts :D

goldaries13
05-17-2009, 07:45 PM
How does one "train" a hubby?! Mine's still disobedient. I should stop talking about my husband like he's a puppy(though he does follow me around alot:lol:).

A rolled up newspaper and a spray bottle?

More like a riding crop and a leash. Oh, dear, I think I've said too much. :o :p ;) :roll:

The_Dane
05-17-2009, 07:48 PM
Honestly, I have no idea what she did. All I know is one day she says she's bored and I just got up and went to Blockbuster to get a chick flick. There was no thought required. I, personally, think it was drugs slipped into my food along with some hypnosis.

Sliceanddice
05-17-2009, 08:06 PM
its like the ceiling fan and jeff fox worthy
"One day she said i'm warm and i got up out of my seat, walked across the room turn on the ceiling fan and walked back to my seat and just as i was about to sit down i thought 'woah i wasn't warm" or something like that lol

The_Dane
05-17-2009, 08:12 PM
its like the ceiling fan and jeff fox worthy
"One day she said i'm warm and i got up out of my seat, walked across the room turn on the ceiling fan and walked back to my seat and just as i was about to sit down i thought 'woah i wasn't warm" or something like that lol

I know. I heard that, and immediately I knew what he meant, because I've done it myself. I have no idea how women do it.

SengaKitty
05-17-2009, 08:44 PM
More like a riding crop and a leash. Oh, dear, I think I've said too much. :o :p ;) :roll:

-grin- I've got some stuff you can borrow ;)

I have no idea how women do it.

We're just THAT good :D :devil::lol:

BookstoreEscapee
05-17-2009, 09:11 PM
I know. I heard that, and immediately I knew what he meant, because I've done it myself. I have no idea how women do it.

You're not supposed to know. Just accept it.

BethB
05-17-2009, 10:06 PM
More like a riding crop and a leash. Oh, dear, I think I've said too much. :o :p ;) :roll:

A rolled up newspaper and a spray bottle?

Me thinks I'll use the newspaper and spray bottle. I'd have alot less explaining to do:roll:

Cia
05-19-2009, 05:18 AM
Hmm, my hubby doesn't do that kinda stuff but he did buy me a revolver for my birthday a couple of years ago, so maybe we're just the odd ones out.

The_Dane
05-19-2009, 08:32 PM
*Shakes head* Y'all are nuts. Especially the one I live with.

Today wasn't too bad. Of course, I have a small threshold for that these days. I now have a feeding tube, but on the upside, I get it removed after my radiation's over, which in three or four weeks, if I recall correctly. After that, it's MRIs and CAT scans to see how the tumor responded, and we go from there.

Dr. L has told us chances of a favorable outcome (as in, treatment not getting any more aggressive) was initially 70%, but is now more like 60%. Something about the frequency of seizures for this tumor(which was not responsible for my initial seizure) bringing it down a bit. Still, we hope.

Irving Patrick Freleigh
05-19-2009, 11:16 PM
Dr. L has told us chances of a favorable outcome (as in, treatment not getting any more aggressive) was initially 70%, but is now more like 60%. Something about the frequency of seizures for this tumor(which was not responsible for my initial seizure) bringing it down a bit. Still, we hope.

We do, too. :)

BookstoreEscapee
05-19-2009, 11:36 PM
I'm keeping my (mental) fingers crossed for you. :)

MannersMakethMan
05-19-2009, 11:37 PM
Still, we hope.

In the Kingdom of hope, there is no Winter. (An old Russian saying I think)

Hoping for the best.

Megg
05-20-2009, 01:16 AM
Dr. L has told us chances of a favorable outcome (as in, treatment not getting any more aggressive) was initially 70%, but is now more like 60%. Something about the frequency of seizures for this tumor(which was not responsible for my initial seizure) bringing it down a bit. Still, we hope.

Ahh, but the doctor has no idea of the mystical healing power of the CS juju. You will be just fine, we shall brook no arguments! :lol:

Welcome to CS!:wave:

Chazzie
05-20-2009, 02:01 AM
I don't know HOW I missed this thread, but better late than never, I hope!

Kudos to both of you for staying strong on this, even with school! And a late "That dress is gorgeous" as well. I'll be thinking of you two.

Also, you live in NY? Now I'm dying to know where. I always love the possibility of being within meeting range of people I see online. :p

SengaKitty
05-20-2009, 02:13 AM
I'm praying for you guys. And don't listen to that silly doctor, he doesn't know the power of prayer from friends. :hug:

BookstoreEscapee
05-20-2009, 02:17 AM
Also, you live in NY? Now I'm dying to know where. I always love the possibility of being within meeting range of people I see online. :p

We should do a tri-state area meetup someday...

Chazzie
05-20-2009, 04:03 AM
I'm 4 hours from NYC, so that would be kind of hard. But who knows!

Becks
05-20-2009, 05:07 PM
Y'all are nuts.

Of course we are. Normal people are boring. :D

Still, we hope.

*happy thoughts and prayers*

goldaries13
05-22-2009, 03:31 AM
Also, you live in NY? Now I'm dying to know where. I always love the possibility of being within meeting range of people I see online. :p

We live in Buffalo. Now, anyway. Usually we spend summers in Auburn at a friend's, but we're forgoing it this year. We're also contemplating a move once I graduate and The Dane goes back to school for his DPT and gets his physical therapist's certification.

Some good news, and some so-so news, neither related to health, unfortunately.

The good news: the Dane will be continuing his studies as planned, just in the spring instead of fall; he finally got accepted into the DPT program at UB. (though why you want to continue at this school, I have no idea, sweetie... At least by the time you finish, I'll be getting my bachelor's :P)

The so-so news: The big, fancy wedding has been postponed to August (originally we planned it for July). Unfortunately, I can't invite any of you guys... We're full up already!

BookstoreEscapee
05-22-2009, 04:54 PM
he finally got accepted into the DPT program at UB. (though why you want to continue at this school, I have no idea, sweetie... At least by the time you finish, I'll be getting my bachelor's :P)

Congrats! Good luck :)

The so-so news: The big, fancy wedding has been postponed to August (originally we planned it for July). Unfortunately, I can't invite any of you guys... We're full up already!

That's OK, we'll just have a virtual party here (where's Irv's dancing banana smiley...?)

Red_Dazes
05-22-2009, 05:11 PM
You're in our thoughts hun. You and Dave.

Shpepper
05-23-2009, 07:19 AM
Just share some pics with us. I know I will be happy then.

The_Dane
05-27-2009, 01:24 PM
Okay, life? It sucks. I'm nauseous and I'm seriously craving some cappuccino and I CAN'T HAVE ANY because of the radiation burning my throat and the cappuccino will only make it worse, I guess. Damn it.

[snip]though why you want to continue at this school, I have no idea, sweetie... At least by the time you finish, I'll be getting my bachelor's :P

Bah! It's either UB or move to Syracuse. I think. I can't remember if they still have a DPT program. Or if there are any DPT programs outside of UB. See what lack of any sort of coffee does to me?

The so-so news: The big, fancy wedding has been postponed to August (originally we planned it for July). Unfortunately, I can't invite any of you guys... We're full up already!

I still think we should have put the bridesmaids in the blue dress with all the ruffles. :p :angel:

SengaKitty
05-27-2009, 01:26 PM
Dane, could you drink ice coffee? You can still get the iced cappachinos... I feel for you, my dad's throat did the same thing when they zapped his throat cancer. -offers hugs and lots of iced coffee- Oh yeah, did I mention I'm a coffee addict too?

goldaries13
05-27-2009, 01:39 PM
Dane, could you drink ice coffee? You can still get the iced cappachinos...

Let me do the whining for him... But the iced cappuccinos taste different! They taste like ass!

Did I do it right, dear? ;)

The_Dane
05-27-2009, 01:40 PM
Let me do the whining for him... But the iced cappuccinos taste different! They taste like ass!

Did I do it right, dear? ;)

Smashing. But they do taste different. You just can't tell because your taste buds can't truly appreciate coffee.

goldaries13
05-27-2009, 01:42 PM
Smashing. But they do taste different. You just can't tell because your taste buds can't truly appreciate coffee.

I'd rather have tea, that's true. Celestial Seasonings wild berry zinger FTW!

The_Dane
05-27-2009, 01:48 PM
I'd rather have tea, that's true. Celestial Seasonings wild berry zinger FTW!

I find it funny that we're conversing on CS when we could just as easily turn our heads and say something to each other.

SengaKitty
05-27-2009, 01:55 PM
I agree it does taste different, but iced mochas and iced hazelnut cappachino aren't bad...

Nurian
05-27-2009, 02:07 PM
I find it funny that we're conversing on CS when we could just as easily turn our heads and say something to each other.

But then no one else would see/hear it :D

AccountingDrone
05-27-2009, 02:08 PM
I'd rather have tea, that's true. Celestial Seasonings wild berry zinger FTW!

not into the berry flavors but I seriously adore red zinger and lemon zinger ... have you tried mixing lemon zinger and a little bit of fresh mint?

I make ice cubes out of red or lemon zinger just so when I want some floating cubes in my iced zinger I dont dillute the taste=) and sometimes I freeze a sprig of mint into the cube, or a small slice of lemon =)

why yes, I do have too much time on my hands .... [but I have a lead on a new job squee]

goldaries13
05-27-2009, 02:35 PM
not into the berry flavors but I seriously adore red zinger and lemon zinger ... have you tried mixing lemon zinger and a little bit of fresh mint?

I make ice cubes out of red or lemon zinger just so when I want some floating cubes in my iced zinger I dont dillute the taste=) and sometimes I freeze a sprig of mint into the cube, or a small slice of lemon =)

why yes, I do have too much time on my hands .... [but I have a lead on a new job squee]

I love lemon zinger, too... but wild berry or raspberry calm my cramps during the red tide. That, and if I sweeten it just right, it's like the halls fruit breezers cough drops(which I'm addicted to).

That being said, the tension tamer tea kind of blows, and the sleepytime does work... but only in conjunction with my herbal sleeping pills. I love the green teas, too, particularly the goji berry pomegranate.

Oh, and sweetheart? Yes, it's quite amusing. How are things on your couch?

The_Dane
05-27-2009, 02:36 PM
[snip]
Oh, and sweetheart? Yes, it's quite amusing. How are things on your couch?

Relaxing, but I think the air conditioner needs to be turned down. Rock paper scissors?

goldaries13
05-27-2009, 02:37 PM
Relaxing, but I think the air conditioner needs to be turned down. Rock paper scissors?

Just kick it or something, you lazy git.

Becks
05-27-2009, 07:23 PM
Just kick it or something, you lazy git.

*Feeling the love* :lol:

The_Dane
05-28-2009, 01:32 AM
*Feeling the love* :lol:

That's nothing compared to the first time we met. That will be a post in cursing out coworkers soon, because it involved all my fellow volunteers at a rehab facility.

SengaKitty
05-28-2009, 01:55 AM
Ya'll sound like Sir and me :lol: Oh, and Dane, I tried to post before work (when my net crapped out) that I know the iced coffee doesn't taste the same, but if you want a coffee fix, an iced mocha or iced hazelnut is great :) (coming from a fellow coffee lover)

goldaries13
05-28-2009, 04:30 AM
That's nothing compared to the first time we met. That will be a post in cursing out coworkers soon, because it involved all my fellow volunteers at a rehab facility.

What, the bedpan story?

Becks
05-28-2009, 03:56 PM
That's nothing compared to the first time we met. That will be a post in cursing out coworkers soon, because it involved all my fellow volunteers at a rehab facility.

I can't wait!! :popcorn:

What, the bedpan story?

I'm hooked already.

The_Dane
05-28-2009, 04:40 PM
What, the bedpan story?

That, and the other one.

goldaries13
05-28-2009, 04:42 PM
That, and the other one.

What, the medication story?

The_Dane
05-28-2009, 04:43 PM
What, the medication story?

No, the other one.

goldaries13
05-28-2009, 04:43 PM
No, the other one.

Huh?

...

Oh! The sex thing!

The_Dane
05-28-2009, 04:46 PM
Huh?

...

Oh! The sex thing!

:doh: :lol:

Yes, dear. That story.

Mikkel
05-28-2009, 07:29 PM
:doh: :lol:

Yes, dear. That story.

Okay, so we can expect a bedpan, a medication AND a sex story soon?

tropicsgoddess
05-28-2009, 09:39 PM
Okay, so we can expect a bedpan, a medication AND a sex story soon?

Let's hear it and pass around the :popcorn:!

Nurian
05-29-2009, 12:57 AM
I'm with tropicsgoddess now. This ought to be good!

....you know, maybe you guys should make your own thread. Aside from this one, I mean. "Goldaries and The Dane discussion thread" or something. Just a thought :D

SengaKitty
05-29-2009, 01:42 AM
I'm so waiting for these stories! Someone pass the popcorn!

The_Dane
05-29-2009, 04:17 AM
Okay, so we can expect a bedpan, a medication AND a sex story soon?

Well, the medication one is just a little bizarre. The sex one is complex, and the bedpan one is actually part of the reason for our meeting.

I'm with tropicsgoddess now. This ought to be good!

....you know, maybe you guys should make your own thread. Aside from this one, I mean. "Goldaries and The Dane discussion thread" or something. Just a thought :D

We should. But I think we'll pass; it would mostly be me trying to be witty and then goldaries adding another week to my basement punishment.

The_Dane
05-29-2009, 05:19 AM
Here it is. (http://www.customerssuck.com/board/showthread.php?t=48473)

Sliceanddice
05-29-2009, 06:07 AM
awww cute!!!!!

BookstoreEscapee
05-29-2009, 11:04 PM
I sqee'd over there, but I'll squee here, too.

Squee!! :D

SengaKitty
05-30-2009, 01:36 AM
Hehehehehe SQUEE that was so cute!

goldaries13
06-07-2009, 02:38 AM
*Sigh* Bad news. A few days ago, The Dane had a major seizure and had to be rushed to the hospital. He's still up at the hospital, and had his last radiation treatment yesterday. Dr. L leveled with me: they think the radiation may have only slowed the growth of the tumor, if it even did anything, because he wouldn't have had a seizure of the magnitude he did otherwise.

I had the longest cry of my life yesterday. Dr. L says they're going to keep trying, but I'm so scared for The Dane and that he might not make it. They've been sedating him, so he's more or less been asleep since the seizure. As far as I can tell, they're keeping a very close eye on him while they run tests to determine the next stage.

I guess it's time to break open the panic cabinet again.

BookstoreEscapee
06-07-2009, 02:43 AM
Oh, no...:hug:

We're all pulling for him..

CrazedClerkthe2nd
06-07-2009, 03:45 AM
That's too bad, I'll be praying for you.

RootedPhoenix
06-07-2009, 04:14 AM
Like BSE said, we're all pulling for him.

I've got him and you in my prayers. *hugs*

Becks
06-07-2009, 06:16 AM
*hugs and prayers*

Bella_Vixen
06-07-2009, 06:50 AM
*MANY hugs and prayers*

Shpepper
06-07-2009, 07:04 AM
Oh Shit. I am so sorry. I hope that he starts getting better soon. Lots of prayers and healing thoughts for both of you.

SengaKitty
06-07-2009, 07:10 AM
Hugs and many MANY prayers hon!

Rapscallion
06-07-2009, 10:01 AM
I'm not religious, but you're both in my thoughts.

Rapscallion

Mikkel
06-07-2009, 03:35 PM
I'm not into praying but I'll think of you and hope for better news soon.

goldaries13
06-09-2009, 01:56 AM
Thank you for all the support. It really means a lot.

So... I kind of just lost it today. I was at the hospital, The Dane was awake and alert, and we were talking, and all of a sudden, I just snapped and started screaming at him. Like, all out shouting: How can you be so calm, don't you dare tell me it'll be okay, god damn it stop fucking smirking you Nordic bastard.... I really lit into him. I said everything that had been on my mind these past few weeks, and then some.

I actually physically exhausted myself with all the yelling I did. When I was done, The Dane simply said, "Are you finished?" When I nodded, he said "Good. Glad you finally decided to say something. But I still lost that bet with your brother."

What, wha?

The Dane explained it all: apparently, I'm no good at hiding my distress from anyone, and The Dane and my brother made a bet as to when I would finally lose it. Apparently, The Dane lost the bet.

But god damn it, The Dane's not mad at me, and I want him to be! Why does he ruin everything? :roll:

RootedPhoenix
06-09-2009, 02:11 AM
Oh :roll:!

This is why I love you people. *hugs* I hope he really does get better.

XCashier
06-09-2009, 03:37 AM
A sense of humor is a good sign. Still praying for you both here. :hug:

morgana
06-09-2009, 01:21 PM
I'll keep a candle lit, sweetie. :hug:

goldaries13
07-12-2009, 12:39 AM
Sorry I haven't posted. We were in the process of moving to the new apartment and I was just way too beat.

Some odd things have happened. Apparently, the tumor has shrunk considerably(from the size of a small orange to the size of maybe two marbles). Good news, but the fact that it's shrunk means that it is most likely not the cause of the seizures. Dr. L told us it could be any number of things: misfiring nerves, the brain adjusting to the change in pressure, etc. They're not likely permanent, in any case, and the team is working to discover the root cause.

The Dane has been in and out of the hospital. The tumor has decreased at such a rate that the rest can be removed relatively safely via surgery, and he'll have that next week.

I've had to get a second job to deal with expenses, but it's a work-at-home thing, so I don't mind too much. If all goes well, the Dane will be headed back to work in about three months(and I can quit this second job), and back at school in about six or seven.

And I'm off to eat my Wegmans sub.

Der Cute
07-12-2009, 12:46 AM
Wow!
That's GOOD news, I'd rather have 2 marbles than one huge ass orange!!

Yay!

Keep an eye on the seizures. Is he taking any anti-seizure drugs to stop them, or is Doc saying let it run the course?

Hugs to you both, and lots of chocolate covered cashews.

Cutenoob

CaroPhoenix
07-12-2009, 01:07 AM
YAY! I like good news like that!

:hug:

Please keep us informed whenever you can!

BookstoreEscapee
07-12-2009, 02:51 AM
I'm very glad to read your latest. Here's hoping things keep getting better :)

Shpepper
07-12-2009, 04:11 AM
I am so glad that you posted. I've been wondering how you both are doing. I'm glad to hear that things seem to be looking up and that the tumor is shrinking. Take care of yourselves.

Bella_Vixen
07-12-2009, 04:30 AM
*hugs and a happy dance*

tropicsgoddess
07-12-2009, 04:30 AM
Glad to hear you guys are doing good! Horray for shrinking tumors!

Megg
07-12-2009, 06:44 AM
The tumor has decreased at such a rate that the rest can be removed relatively safely via surgery, and he'll have that next week.

Okay, people, use those birthday wishes wisely, this is proof they come true!! :D

*does a happy dance*

RootedPhoenix
07-12-2009, 10:47 AM
HAPPYDANCES ALL AROUND.

This is great news. :D :D :D :D YAY YAY YAY!!!

Becks
07-12-2009, 02:18 PM
:bounce:

Woo hoo!!

*hugs and happy dancing, which may or may not be a ripoff of "Evolution of Dance"*

XCashier
07-14-2009, 03:26 AM
Apparently, the tumor has shrunk considerably(from the size of a small orange to the size of maybe two marbles)....The tumor has decreased at such a rate that the rest can be removed relatively safely via surgery, and he'll have that next week.
Excellent news! :grats: Best wishes for a speedy and thorough recovery for The Dane!

goldaries13
07-14-2009, 07:20 AM
Wow!

Keep an eye on the seizures. Is he taking any anti-seizure drugs to stop them, or is Doc saying let it run the course?


Since they've pretty much figured out it's due to pressure issues, they're letting them run the course. The seizures have toned down in severity since his last hospital visit. In the meantime, he's to stay away from anything that could trigger them, which means, among other things, no caffeine. As he's a coffee addict, this is a problem.

He can't wait to start driving again (read: alone time away from me and my crazy relatives), and just generally having things back to normal.

Mikkel
07-14-2009, 08:40 PM
I'm glad to hear the Dane is better, I was worried when you didn't update.

Der Cute
07-14-2009, 10:36 PM
Stress, caffiene, lack of water, lack of sleep, screaming kids (j/k) can all cause seizures. No Choccy for now.

Talk to your doctor - I do know that once a person has had multiple seizures - they are likely to have them again. My niece has febrile (fever) seizures ...and she's now prone to having them during a fever. This isn't epilepsy. BUT their doctor also says that she may develop E later in life because she's had a few seizures now.

Overall, you guys are doing great!! I'm glad to hear the good news. Hugs to both of you and GOOD LUCK with the marble-removal.

Cutenoob

goldaries13
07-25-2009, 02:03 PM
The Dane went into surgery on Wednesday. It went smoothly, but he's going to be in the hospital for the next week (at least) for monitoring and whatnot.

My mom has finally gone to a hotel, the same one all my brothers are staying in, so I finally have peace and quiet for the most part. I've been taking advantage of my alone time, going to the movies, having lunch with friends, etc.

Some good news on my own personal front: Friday, in physical therapy, I managed to walk three feet with the help of a cane. Not a walker, a cane! Baby steps, but I may be out of my chair in two years! I may actually walk again, and no more chair! YES!

BookstoreEscapee
07-25-2009, 02:12 PM
The Dane went into surgery on Wednesday. It went smoothly, but he's going to be in the hospital for the next week (at least) for monitoring and whatnot.

Glad to see that. :) I've been wondering. Hope he's driving the nurses crazy and he'll be home before you know it.

Some good news on my own personal front: Friday, in physical therapy, I managed to walk three feet with the help of a cane. Not a walker, a cane! Baby steps, but I may be out of my chair in two years! I may actually walk again, and no more chair! YES!

Wow! That is awesome! :grats:

RootedPhoenix
07-25-2009, 02:33 PM
I may actually walk again, and no more chair! YES!

*happy dances* :grats: That is wonderful! *happy dances again*

tropicsgoddess
07-25-2009, 03:28 PM
The Dane went into surgery on Wednesday. It went smoothly, but he's going to be in the hospital for the next week (at least) for monitoring and whatnot.

----<SNIP>-----

Some good news on my own personal front: Friday, in physical therapy, I managed to walk three feet with the help of a cane. Not a walker, a cane! Baby steps, but I may be out of my chair in two years! I may actually walk again, and no more chair! YES!

Glad to hear things are going good for Dane. Awesome progress on getting out of the chair, GA!!! :grats:

Becks
07-25-2009, 05:45 PM
Yaaaaaaaaaaay!!!

XCashier
07-25-2009, 08:23 PM
:grats: That's wonderful! :cheers:

SengaKitty
07-26-2009, 05:25 AM
Oh GA, it is so wonderful to see you post good news :D Congrats on the progress at physical therapy. That is so exciting :D And I hope The Dane is feeling better soon. I'm so happy for both of you :D :grats:

Der Cute
07-26-2009, 05:43 AM
w00t w00t !

Woohoo, this is GREAT news.
Hugs to both of you - and lots of sunshine (I'm in san diego today).

Cutenoob

Bella_Vixen
07-28-2009, 02:09 AM
Happy dance x 2!! :wave:

goldaries13
08-07-2009, 11:22 PM
The Dane is home. He's driving me nuts. I'm seriously thinking of auctioning him off to the highest bidder.

Does this make me a bad person? He's just so annoying right now! Gah!

NightWatch
08-07-2009, 11:42 PM
Squeak! That's so awesome to hear about you gettin out of the chair. When you get stronger at walking, I'll take you out dancing :P

I find small ways to irritate the man when he's being a pain. Like hiding his favorite snack or his left shoe. He never seems to think it's me either....

BookstoreEscapee
08-08-2009, 12:21 AM
The Dane is home. He's driving me nuts. I'm seriously thinking of auctioning him off to the highest bidder.

Does this make me a bad person? He's just so annoying right now! Gah!

Welcome Home, The Dane!! Stop annoying your wife (I know you're reading this)! :D

Becks
08-09-2009, 06:08 PM
The Dane is home. He's driving me nuts. I'm seriously thinking of auctioning him off to the highest bidder.

Does this make me a bad person?

1. Yaaaaaaaaaay!!

2. He's a guy. That's what they do.

3. I wish I'd read this before I dissipated my fortune at the state fair.

4. No.

Irving Patrick Freleigh
08-09-2009, 06:37 PM
3. I wish I'd read this before I dissipated my fortune at the state fair.



:ot: I'm planning to do the same on Friday.

Gets me out of doing a truck Saturday because I was smart enough to take Saturday off. http://img99.exs.cx/img99/8577/yupi3ti.gif

goldaries13
08-11-2009, 12:52 AM
Well, things have been quiet lately. The Dane isn't getting on my nerves as much (which may or may not have something to do with the last time he asked me to get him a glass of water and the water ended up being sugary and salty, not that I'd know anything about that. :angel:).

Oh, by the way, my family has banded together and sprung on hand controls to be installed on The Dane's car. With the hand controls (consisting of a digital accelerator ring and and a main handbrake, something like this (http://www.kempf-usa.com/Handcontrols_description.html)), I can actually learn to drive, without having to use my feet. Awesome.

Der Cute
08-11-2009, 12:57 AM
Go you! Both of you!
I'm so glad things have worked out for you two. See? Stubborn Danish people pull through :)

gawd that all rhymes.

Cutenoob

SengaKitty
08-12-2009, 06:53 AM
The Dane is home. He's driving me nuts. I'm seriously thinking of auctioning him off to the highest bidder.

Does this make me a bad person? He's just so annoying right now! Gah!

I'll trade you, mine's driving me up the wall too, but he's not home yet...

Welcome home The Dane and quit bugging GA :P

tropicsgoddess
08-13-2009, 02:45 PM
Well, things have been quiet lately. The Dane isn't getting on my nerves as much (which may or may not have something to do with the last time he asked me to get him a glass of water and the water ended up being sugary and salty, not that I'd know anything about that. :angel:).

Oh, by the way, my family has banded together and sprung on hand controls to be installed on The Dane's car. With the hand controls (consisting of a digital accelerator ring and and a main handbrake, something like this (http://www.kempf-usa.com/Handcontrols_description.html)), I can actually learn to drive, without having to use my feet. Awesome.

Wow, that's wicked awesome on the car! :eek: :D Dane, no more annoying GA, got that?! :lol:

goldaries13
08-28-2009, 04:13 PM
Sorry for lack of updates; school starts soon and my sanity is fleeting.

The Dane went to the hospital last night. I'm not sure what happened, exactly (I was at work, and my mom and one of my brothers were at the apartment, and the story's kind of garbled), but the gist is The Dane had a minor seizure, which considering the fact he hasn't had one since about a week before his last surgery, was a minor cause for alarm. He was admitted overnight, and may not come home for a few days. Dr. L. reassured me this was a precaution in cause of other seizures, though it's highly likely this was an isolated incident, since the pressure has more or less returned to normal.

I really do hope so. Keeping positive, but every time this happens that paranoia that the tumor may regrow gnaws at me a little.

Sliceanddice
08-28-2009, 04:19 PM
Dr. L. reassured me this was a precaution in cause of other seizures, though it's highly likely this was an isolated incident, since the pressure has more or less returned to normal.

I really do hope so. Keeping positive, but every time this happens that paranoia that the tumor may regrow gnaws at me a little.

i completely believe the doc, if you had seizures because of x while x is healing most likely you will have one or two random seizures that mean their just some inflammation still. though its always good to have a little worry so you look for warning signs