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View Full Version : Need A Laugh?


blas
06-12-2009, 06:19 PM
Of course, a laugh at my neighbors' continuing stupidity and hopelessness?

I would have expected Old Bitch or Sheriff to do something like this, considering how overly paranoid the two of them are. But nope, it wasn't them.

The looney couple, who live next door to Old Bitch......I really don't see them much, they tend to keep to themselves and really don't do much but go places and come back. They are an older couple, probably retired or close to it......the guy is the one who sits out on the porch and plays guitar and warbles like a toad, or sits out there blasting a small boom box radio to talk radio during the middle of the day, he's also the guy who stormed outside in his underwear one morning this spring when my friends and I got home from the bar.....the woman is just plain odd in general.

They have a later 90s Dodge Stratus, and apparently they are afraid someone is really going to want to steal it...or whatever it is inside of it. Old Bitch must have told them about the *very few* car thefts that happen around here. Just lock your damn car or even better, don't put valuable stuff in there!

Anyway, you know how most new cars these days come with little pinpads on the driver's side door, to punch in a code to unlock your car? You can also get those installed on older cars, if you really feel it necessary.

Yup. They got one. For their late 90s Dodge Stratus.

That's not really the funny part. The funny part is how a few minutes ago, I was out for a smoke, and saw them go outside to leave. The two front windows were rolled almost all the way down, enough for an adult hand to stick in there and open the door or steal stuff.

The woman was violently trying to remember the code and kept screwing up and was getting all frazzled that she couldn't unlock the car.....while the damn windows were almost ALL THE WAY DOWN........

If you're going to go that damn far to prevent theft....figure out how to USE your security system and don't do stupid things like leave your windows all the way down!

Nurian
06-12-2009, 06:32 PM
I....but....guh...... :wtf:
I really need to stop using my brain. Many people make it hurt....

blas
06-12-2009, 06:34 PM
Well, it is quite hot out today. It's only in the lower 70s, but lately, the mercury has struggled during the day to go over 60.....last Saturday we set a record for how cold it was. It was only 45 degrees last Saturday.

Nurian
06-12-2009, 06:37 PM
Lower 70's is hot? I wear my jacket unless it's over 75. :D

Even still, you don't need the window that far down. Just a crack, maybe a finger's width.

blas
06-12-2009, 06:41 PM
Hey, it's Wisconsin. And we're in the middle of another ice age, it seems. I wear tanktops when it's 65 degrees or warmer.

Since it's really sunny today, the inside of the car can get really hot really quick. When I left my parents' place at 11:30, it was sweltering in there, I was rolling down the freeway with all the windows down. And just sitting in traffic.......it can get really hot when your car has no A/C.

But still, yeah. It's too funny. Nowdays I really don't know who to pin the craziest label on......

In reality, people are going to try to steal from a car with MANUAL locks, MANUAL windows....cars like, oh, Neons......cars that are easy to break into without causing much damage or making lots of noise.

No one wants the stuffed animals and toy turtles in Old Bitch's Buick, and I can assure you, no one wants the tin foil hats and other crazy junk in the Crazy Couple's Stratus.

MaggieTheCat
06-12-2009, 07:01 PM
Hey, it's Wisconsin. And we're in the middle of another ice age, it seems. I wear tanktops when it's 65 degrees or warmer.


:roll: I do too! I'm from Wisconsin, so I know exactly what you mean, Blas. I just moved to Texas...it got up to almost 100 yesterday...I was sweating wearing a tank top, shorts, and sitting in the shade, not doing anything except playing my DS. :lol:

Sucks that it's so cold up there this summer, though. My parents keep me WELL informed of their lack of sunshine lately...

blas
06-12-2009, 07:03 PM
Today is the first day I haven't bitched about the weather since Memorial Day weekend.

Slytovhand
06-12-2009, 07:07 PM
Hey, when I first moved down here, I was advised to keep the car locked, because people were stealing street directories from them.....

Nurian
06-12-2009, 07:07 PM
My Basic was one at Ft. Sill. It regularly got about 110. Even in the dark greens, I was very comfortable. When we ran out of water, however, then it got bad.

blas
06-12-2009, 07:11 PM
Well, it's not like it NEVER happens around here. Obviously, you can live in a decent neighborhood and hoodlums and schmucks still will find a way to break in to stuff......Tommy Lee's Jeep got broken into two winters ago, and some bicycles were stolen last summer (but they weren't even locked up!).

I just keep my car locked and don't leave anything important in there. I have a feeling if anyone stole my CDs, they'd give them right back once they heard obnoxious 80s jams and disco and Whacko Jacko, since those are the CDs I always leave in plain sight.

jedimaster91
06-12-2009, 09:48 PM
I'd be shocked if anyone stole a Stratus. I had one. It was junk. That car made me swear to never buy an American-made automobile again.

Peppergirl
06-12-2009, 10:01 PM
My son drives a '97 stratus. I made him come down and read this. He laughed his ass off and asked 'what are THEY on?'

:roll:

csquared
06-12-2009, 11:57 PM
Sounds like an old joke...

I need the key NOW! The top is down and it is about to rain!

jedimaster91
06-13-2009, 02:48 AM
My son drives a '97 stratus. I made him come down and read this. He laughed his ass off and asked 'what are THEY on?'

:roll:

Mine was an '02. I guess they just don't make 'em like they used to. :p

It was also a used mission car, which is worse than a used rental car. The summer my parents bought it, that car was in the shop for one problem or another every week. Oftentimes, multiple times per week. It's a wonder I ever got to drive it at all. Our mechanic even purchased a machine to diagnose check engine lights because of my Stratus. Now the transmission's jacked up; it jerks when it downshifts around 30mph (so between 3rd and 2nd). My parents are going to junk it, but I wouldn't even use that rust heap for spare parts.

blas
06-13-2009, 04:38 PM
Dodge in general has issues. Period.

I'm never driving Dodge again once this car goes kapooie.

It wasn't even raining yesterday. When this incident happened, it was lower 70s and bright sunshine! It got really cloudy and gloomy around 5-6 pm, but it didn't rain.

Jester
06-13-2009, 04:50 PM
My first two vehicles were Dodges.

I will never buy a Dodge again!

Food Lady
06-13-2009, 10:26 PM
Lower 70's is hot? I wear my jacket unless it's over 75. :D Even still, you don't need the window that far down. Just a crack, maybe a finger's width. Lower 70s is air-conditioner-worthy weather here. But when I was in California, anything under 65 was arctic winter. It's all reletive. I have a feeling if anyone stole my CDs, they'd give them right backMy friend's car was stolen April Fool's Day 2008, probably by some teens who do it every year. Most of her CDs were not returned with the car, but she did get her ABBA CD back. :D