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Antisocial_Worker
08-14-2011, 06:24 AM
Due to the onslaught of forced overtime at the Factory of the Damned, rather than celebrating my birthday yesterday, on the day I was actually born 31 years ago, I celebrated it today. My boyfriend managed to gather a few of my best friends and we had a nice supper (after a jaunt through the shopping center where the restaurant is located that involved plunging my hand inadvertently into a used toilet, and bursting into tears at a pet shop) before heading off downtown to wander and mingle.

Mind you, I live in a resort city and it's the middle of high tourist season. We're also known as a somewhat odd place, and while we're interesting enough in the off season, during tourist season you are outright guaranteed to see something to write home about.

And so we did.

Things spotted downtown tonight:

1. Breakdancers in front of the art museum performing to an appreciative crowd. From time to time they would take a break (ha!) and the crowd would disperse. Later on they would start up again, and another crowd would instantly form. For instant spectators, just add breakdancing!

2. Street preacher bellowing about salvation, walking back and forth on a low wall at one edge of the central square. Behind him, people were taking pictures of each other astride the big bronze turkey and pig. One man had his picture taken while appearing to surf the pig.

3. In rapid succession, a disturbed person having an intense argument with a tree, a very butch lesbian who demanded two dollars for the bus, and another disturbed person who took offense to the first disturbed person and -- rather than work out his aggression on the first disturbed person -- decided instead to chase me down the street.

4. A man wearing yellow body paint, khaki pants, and very high, rhinestone-studded high heels balancing on a small teeter-totter while juggling scimitars.

5. A family of Sikhs. Remember that beards + turbans + plaid shorts = awesome. Always.

6. A man dressed as a nun, riding a 12-foot-tall bicycle out in front of a speeding purple school bus filled with screaming tourists. As it passed, one friend noted the screaming, then noted, "Oh, it's just *local tour company*." Then we returned to our conversation with a nearby man and his 135-pound gray dog without a hitch.

7. Graffiti in a coffee shop bathroom. Some highlights included the word "poultry" scrawled. Nearby, someone else had written "Yummy!" and drown an arrow to "poultry." Over the sink someone had written "Everybody who pees in the sink check here." Underneath were five check marks. Below that someone else had written "She can't hurt me anymore. Waiting 4 mother 2 die." And those were just what I remember. Every surface in the bathroom, including the toilet, was thickly covered with the written word.

8. A group of people in the bookstore/champagne bar where we ended the evening having a very loud conversation about how one of the ladies in the group looks very regal when she's throwing up in the street. Later, the comment was made that "if you went to some fairytale witch's hut in the woods, but it was run by hipsters, it would look like this."

And finally...

9. A very drunk group of people -- the men in suits and the women in cocktail dresses -- staggering down the street. One of the men hoisted one of the women over his shoulder and continued on his way with her head wagging limply at just the right height to bump his ass with her nose.

I remarked to my boyfriend that it was unusual, yes, but hardly the most unusual thing we had seen. It wasn't even the most unusual thing we had seen today.

How about you? Seen anything interesting today?

Food Lady
08-14-2011, 06:30 AM
I think Jester should quit talking about how weird Key West is.

Eireann
08-14-2011, 10:44 AM
About a month ago, I was walking to the bus stop from home. Sometimes, I forgo the bus and just walk down to the main street, where the tram stop is. It's about a ten-minute walk. Other times, I take the bus, as I planned to do this day.

The bus stop is at an area where there are a restaurant, convenience store, and butcher's in a U-shaped building. There is greenery on both sides of the building and partially in front. Next to the bus stop shelter are several recycling bins (here, you have to take your recycling to the bins on your own, rather than having it picked up with your trash service).

Now, a week or so earlier, when I was taking the recycling to the bins, I found a dead hedgehog, which I avoided.

On this particular day, as I approached the bus stop, I saw that a giant, black pig was eating the dead hedgehog.

I decided to walk.

Kara
08-14-2011, 03:53 PM
. From time to time they would take a break (ha!)

That made me giggle.

The greatest thing I think I've ever seen was a guy on a unicycle riding down a bike trail. If only he'd been juggling something....

Also, I think I AM the weirdest thing people see around here. Small town life, you know?

Highlights of the last 2 days:

Giving a coworker a ride to one of the towers because his wife brought him to work so he didn't have his car. As he opened the door, I moved my purse off the passenger seat and put it on the floor at my feet. Him: "Is that YOUR purse?" ME: "Yeah, it is."

Arriving at my tower and waiting for the officer I was relieving to drop the key so I could get in. From the catwalk, he said, "What kind of sunglasses are those?" ME: "They're my pretty ones." Him: "Oh..." My sunglasses have dark purple lenses and where the frames connect to the lenses there are two butterflies with a sparkly fake jewel in the middle of each one.

The officer relieving me from the tower so I could switch out with him and drive the patrol car the rest of the shift. Him: "Are those your wife's sunglasses, or your mother's?" Me: "No, they're mine." Him: "They're YOURS?" Me: "Yeah, they're my pretty ones." Him: "So... you feel pretty wearing them?" Me: "Well, it's kind of hard to feel pretty at work here." Him: "Wait... what are you saying?"

EDIT: Almost forgot a couple from yesterday that made me smile.

Standing with several officers between two doors as we were waiting to enter the gym to be marked off the roster by our shift Lt. And then I hear, "Okay, someone smells NIIICE!" Followed by a chorus of "Not me's." I just stood there grinning, I think I had spritzed one or two more shots of my Japanese Cherry Blossom body spray than I meant to.

Entering the top floor of the tower to relieve the previous shift officer. Him: "Daaaamn, is that you that smells so nice?" Me: "Sure is!"

After 3 months of being openly transgender and living as a woman 24/7, I think they're starting to get it.....

Oh, and last night when I went over to a coworker's house to hang out. I received a wtf look from a guy walking down the street as I walked to my car from my house wearing a purple shirt with sparkly letters and carrying my purse (my coworker had told me to just wear something girly and comfy but not too nice, since I asked what I should wear when he told me his wife would also have a friend visiting).

BookstoreEscapee
08-14-2011, 04:58 PM
bookstore/champagne bar? I don't even like champagne but I want to go there.

The greatest thing I think I've ever seen was a guy on a unicycle riding down a bike trail. If only he'd been juggling something....


I once saw a guy riding a unicycle down the shoulder of the highway my apartment complex is on...:shrug:

Sliceanddice
08-14-2011, 07:09 PM
ummmm guy in a business suit riding a unicycle, teddy-bear with a machine gun, a guy at a construction site dressed in dirty construction site clothing, his hard hat and looking like a rather stereotypical worked construction all his like construction worker with a very clean, very bright, very pink sweater tied around his shoulders like he was in an ambercombie and finch add.

Antisocial_Worker
08-14-2011, 11:32 PM
Food Lady -- In a weird-off, Key West would probably win, but we hold our own up here.

Eireann -- Pig eating a hedgehog... Hm. Just... hm.

Kara -- there is an almost 7-ft-tall mtf transgendered woman who goes to my church. She is a total delight to be around.

BookstoreEscapee -- If you're ever in the area...

Sliceanddice -- It would appear that unicycles are the order of the day.

Bardmaiden
08-14-2011, 11:45 PM
Pink dinosaur with yellow spots, victorian lady, zombie and a roman solder. Normal day on the streets of a 2000 year old city with lots of tourists.

You know Dragon*Con didn't faze me that much the first time I went.... :D

Antisocial_Worker
08-14-2011, 11:55 PM
Barmaiden -- for the win. We have an energetic steampunk community here, so it's not uncommon to see Victorian ladies out and about on our local streets either. You'll only find zombies here once a year (although they take to the streets by the thousands), and it's extremely rare to find a dinosaur or a Roman soldier here.

Bardmaiden
08-15-2011, 12:07 AM
Most of those were promoting different museums or tours of the city. But then there is just the random people but then the locals don't really take much notice of them either.

My sister walked past a stormtrooper on the street the other week and was like "Oh Stormtrooper." and someone behind her got really excited. :lol:

MoonCat
08-15-2011, 05:09 PM
I'm on vacation this week so nothing today, but later in the week, after a trip to the county fair and a day out at the coffee shops, I might have something.

BookstoreEscapee
08-16-2011, 12:04 AM
BookstoreEscapee -- If you're ever in the area...


I'll let ya' know... ;)

DeltaSierra
08-16-2011, 01:41 AM
Most interesting thing today was something that actually isn't too unusual considering the setting. There's a guy in town that is a cross dresser, and I spotted him while in WalMart today - makes me wish I'd had my cell phone handy to take a pic and put on "people of WM" - today he was in a black spaghetti-strapped sequin dress, high heels, his hair teased, wearing a tiara. He's rather sweet, but its funny considering his "Grizzly Adams" style beard and abundance of chest hair showing over the top of the dress.

zombiequeen
08-16-2011, 01:53 AM
And to think, I really want a velociraptor suit so I can chase the squirrels down the street while making "Skree" noises. I live in the old people section in the bad part of town. They need the entertainment that is a velociraptor chasing squirrels! :lol:

Antisocial_Worker
08-16-2011, 01:19 PM
I live in the old people section in the bad part of town. They need the entertainment that is a velociraptor chasing squirrels! :lol:

I could not agree more. While I have never donned a velociraptor suit, I have been known to frighten gathered pigeons. Two is enough for a gathering, as far as I'm concerned, also. Plus now and again, the lone pigeon.

kpzra
08-16-2011, 06:02 PM
And to think, I really want a velociraptor suit so I can chase the squirrels down the street while making "Skree" noises. I live in the old people section in the bad part of town. They need the entertainment that is a velociraptor chasing squirrels! :lol:

I sooo want to make my daughter one for halloween now. I know I could get my husband to do it, he hates squirrels, and well...any excuse to do his SCREEEEE noise...

zombiequeen
08-16-2011, 08:23 PM
I told my husband about it and he said I'm allowed to be a velociraptor for Halloween. :D
Pigeons, like squirrels, are pure evil. They MUST be chased off!:lol:

Treasure
08-16-2011, 10:01 PM
Most interesting thing today was something that actually isn't too unusual considering the setting. There's a guy in town that is a cross dresser, and I spotted him while in WalMart today - makes me wish I'd had my cell phone handy to take a pic and put on "people of WM" - today he was in a black spaghetti-strapped sequin dress, high heels, his hair teased, wearing a tiara. He's rather sweet, but its funny considering his "Grizzly Adams" style beard and abundance of chest hair showing over the top of the dress.
sounds like you saw Leslie (http://www.austinchronicle.com/binary/64b3/pols_atlarge-18501.jpeg)

DeltaSierra
08-17-2011, 07:59 AM
sounds like you saw Leslie (http://www.austinchronicle.com/binary/64b3/pols_atlarge-18501.jpeg)

:lol:

Add about 5" to the beard and it'd be close!

Antisocial_Worker
09-10-2011, 02:23 AM
Interesting things spotted tonight!

A text message log:

7:50 PM Me: Have you already eaten?

8:31 PM Friend: I am at the high school football game with Emily.

8:34 PM Me: We're at Papa's and Beer speculating about that one waitress that everyone thinks is a man.

8:51 PM Friend: She is so a man.

8:55 PM Me: 3 birthday songs and counting. It's also mariachi night.

8:56 PM Me: 4

8:56 PM Friend: Lawl

9:02 PM Me: There's a table of steampunk goths celebrating a birthday. They're jamming out to "Feliz Navidad" right now. This kind of thing is what is wrong with America.

9:03 PM Friend: Nice. Do they have their fangs in?

9:05 PM Me: No, but they're all decked out in black mesh.

9:13 PM Me: 5 birthday songs. The mariachi band just played Rocky Top. (http://youtu.be/FzG97IPg0y8)