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View Full Version : Slang and catch phrases -- what are yours?


Antisocial_Worker
01-27-2012, 11:21 PM
So... What sort of catch phrases and slang words do you find peppering your everyday conversation? Here are most of mine.

"Good heavens!" -- said in a old-ladyish manner such that you can imagine a withered old matron with her hand to her deflated bosom after having seen something shocking on television.

"Oh dear!" -- see above

"My word..." -- see above

"How delightful!" -- also said in an old-ladyish manner, but used to denote sarcastic pleasure in something going fuck-all wrong.

"How extraordinary!" -- said in a faux British accent, used in much the same manner as "How delightful!"

"Meow!" -- usually said at the end of a yawn. When meowing, I usually attempt to emulate Gir from Invader Zim. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=79caGKV_2k0)

"Delicious!" -- gleaned from a Castlevania game where this was what the succubus said every time she latched on to your neck. Used to denote pleasure, sarcastic pleasure, and in many other ways.

"Dude, srsly!" -- pronounced "dude, surslee!" -- usually used when witnessing someone committing a traffic stupidity, such as the two cars that plowed through the crosswalk this morning while my boyfriend and I were out for a stroll.

"Teh ebuls" -- pronounced "teh e-bulls" -- used when sarcastically denoting displeasure, as in "We can't go to that restaurant because their sushi is teh ebuls. I puked for a week after that last time."

"What a strange bit of buggery!" -- used when witnessing an unusual occurrence.

"Hmm... queer." -- also used when witnessing an unusual occurrence.

"Because you fail at life." -- used when sarcastically slamming someone for a minor slight or mistake.

"I thought I smelled failure..." -- also used when sarcastically slamming someone for a minor slight or mistake.

"...of doom." -- used on just about everything because everything is better with doom, as in "Kittens... of doom;" "Fried, breaded shrimp... of doom;" and "First Congregational United Church of Christ... of doom."

"Everything is ruined forever!" -- used when witnessing something of minor or comical unpleasantness.

"Oh, God, I have to go wash now!" -- also use when witnessing something of minor or comical unpleasantness, especially if it happens to be of any perverseness.

"w00t/woot" -- used to express minor approval or pleasure.

"Meh." -- Used to express indifference.

"Oh noes!" -- used to express feigned disapproval or horror.

"Grunties" -- underwear, as in "Ah... a basket full of nice, clean grunties straight from the dryer!"

"Beast/Beastlet" -- Cats/kittens

"Fanged Beast" -- Cats

"Dogma" -- Dogs

In addition, I'm also fond of interjecting random snippets of the song "The Bulbous Bouffant" (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cMfmzEpvW-g) by The Vestibules into everyday conversation.

Dasota
01-27-2012, 11:42 PM
Noms- "Let's go get noms!" Or "I am going to nom upon you!"

Awesomesauce- "You rock like awesomesauce!" or "Awesomesauce over spiffy noodles!"

Rawr, and various other animal noises. Depending on tone the meaning can be everything from 'I love you" to "I'm hungry" to I am so bored please save me. :lol:

I say things like Nifty, and Indeed alot in everyday converstations as well

Food Lady
01-28-2012, 12:05 AM
I'm kinda boring, so I only have a couple:

--a bazillion (a big number)
--deers (plural deer); every other animal gets the correct plural word, but multiple deer are always deers
--oi means oh, my
--dude means wow

dalesys
01-28-2012, 12:10 AM
I'm psychiatric now...
While digesting Reader's Digest in the back of the dirty bookstore...
Cold pizza for breakfast, warm Coke to wash it down...
You're the dead corsage that's in my Figidaire...

bhskittykatt
01-28-2012, 12:19 AM
I also use awesomesauce!

Most of mine are on the vulgar side. "f**kmonkies" is one. "Douchenozzle" is another.

I refer to my trusty YakTrax as "tractionful".

"You just think you're all that and a side of fries, don't you?"
("Side of fries" can be replaced with "bag of chips", "chicken chimichanga", or whatever else I feel like subbing in there at a whim.)

Irving Patrick Freleigh
01-28-2012, 12:28 AM
Four words:

That's what she said.

:D

Becks
01-28-2012, 01:10 AM
scrumptious
oh my damn
holy biscuit
cocksmoker
orgasmic


I'm sure there's more, but I've been horrifyingly sleep deprived lately, so...

Dasota
01-28-2012, 02:08 AM
I also use awesomesauce!

Most of mine are on the vulgar side.)

YAY! Another awesomesauce person! I seriously did not know it was a thing until I found a shirt with the phrase on it at Dragon Con!

As far as vulgar one, I say douche canoe a lot.

dragon_wings
01-28-2012, 02:23 AM
Dude
Awesomeness
Indeed
Douchenozzle
Bitch
Wha? (my standard response of confusion... one of my coworkers purposely tries to get me to say this. lol)
What the fuck?
Fuck
Weird
Gah!
Ugh!
Lawls (lols)
Bitches (when trying, and failing, to sound ghetto)

I use emotes and emoticons like crazy.
I'll even emote out loud on occasion.
Like, in conversation with someone: 'Idk, shrugs.'

I call my boyfriend alternately: love/my love or mate/my mate

ETA: Dude is usually said in one of two ways: 1) Dude, as in addressing a person. Only someone I'm familiar with. 2) Duuuude, elongated u, to emphasis something.

MoonCat
01-28-2012, 03:31 AM
Ewwwwwww - used when I find something old in the back of the fridge :o
GAAAAAHHHHDDD!! - used most often at work in regard to the POS computer system
Razzaaay!!! - Just a silly way of saying "Razzie" which is my boycat's name
Schmiggie-Schmaggie-Schmoo - Our favorite way to referring to the girlcat, Maggie
Hello Bunny Wackets! - my way of greeting my sister's three rabbits
Where's the coffee fairy? - used at home all the time
I'm ever so pissed! - stolen from an episode of The Simpsons
Remember my innocence! - stolen from Benny Hill
Fuck this - muttered at work every time the computer crashes
Also a couple of rather vulgar phrases that pop out when I'm pissed. Won't repeat them here. :o

firecat88
01-28-2012, 03:34 AM
"That. Was awesome." is probably the most self-explanatory one.

"Dude!!" used as an exclamation.

"That was *number* kinds of/all kinds of *adjective*." I've heard it used by other people before, so I know it's not just a 'me' thing, but it means 'That was extremely *adjective*'

"That ain't right/You people are not right."

"Aaaaaand food coma."

"Good night!" Again, an exclamation.

"For crap's sake!"

"Hee!", "Fweep/Fwee", "Squee!" = All generally mean the same thing, but with varying degrees- I have seen something cute or something that has otherwise made me happy

"Myar?", "Huhwhatnow?" = Confusion

brbnoms! = Frequently said in chat and on IM. Used to indicate that breakfast/lunch/dinner is ready

"Oh fer cryin'..."

"Uhm...really?"

tropicsgoddess
01-28-2012, 04:33 AM
Dude, really?!! - in disbelief or annoyed over somebody's stupidity

Aw shitballs! - dropping stuff, forgetting something or to do something

Fuck me running! - same as above

Hell Naw! - self explanatory

No way! - disbelief or emphatic answer for no

Meh - disinterest

Sweet!

Awesome!

Fuck Yeah!

w00t!

Duh!

Ugh

blas
01-28-2012, 04:37 AM
Bonerific = sexy

Dayyyyummmh (damn but spoken like a rapper) = to mock rappers and dumb white kids who try to act tough.

Shawty (shorty) = same as above, pretty much.

Hot dish = casserole. Apparently, Wisconsin is the only place where people say HOT DISH.

Supper club = a little fancier than a restaurant.

dragon_wings
01-28-2012, 04:55 AM
tropicsgoddess reminded me of another:
Occasionally, when really pissed/frustration/tired I'll say 'fuck me sideways'
Usually followed by roomie saying something to the effect: wouldn't that be painful?

Squeaksmyalias
01-28-2012, 04:58 AM
Brains= Said when ever my mind goes blank.
Snugs! = Hugs. Snugs for the dog, snugs for the human, snugs for the plane.
Puppy = anything remotely dog like. In one case a guy I know who once it reaches a certain temperature doesn't shave until it gets warm again.
Booger= my dog, it started as bug, then went to bugger, then went to booger. Her name is Lucy, I've no idea how I even got to this point.

I make up ways to describe aviation things, since I don't know what a lot of things are yet. "Hat thinger for the plane" for example, oddly enough most of the time pilots know what I'm talking about.

bhskittykatt
01-28-2012, 05:36 AM
tropicsgoddess reminded me of another:
Occasionally, when really pissed/frustration/tired I'll say 'fuck me sideways'
Usually followed by roomie saying something to the effect: wouldn't that be painful?

BFF likes to say "fuck me sideways with a spoon"

Food Lady
01-28-2012, 08:35 AM
I forgot the one I use most often: holy moly! I don't even know where I got it from, and people around me have begun to pick it up.

Mishi
01-28-2012, 08:49 AM
My most common catch-phrase is offering to assist a person/object to go fornicate themselves in an inconvenient orifice with several large sharp objects in an improbable manner. It's the best way to let off steam because everyone around me is usually laughing so hard that I can't avoid joining in OR they have such interesting looks on their faces that I'm immediately cheered up.

BrenDAnn
01-28-2012, 08:52 AM
I stole "Fuuuck me!" from Sebastian on Cruel Intentions, used like the "Fuck me sideways" you all have mentioned.

"Holy hell"--used to show shock/as an exclamation, example "Holy hell, it's cold outside!"

I also use Meh. A lot.

"What the actual fuck?" has made its way into my vocabulary.

"Really? I mean REALLY?" is one I've started saying a lot lately too.

Tig Tig--Cute name for my cat, Tigger, who I usually say all kinds of lovey schmucky stuff to while he looks at me like "shut up and feed me, damn human!"

"____ as shit" used as a descriptor, as in "We were busy as shit at work tonight!"

"Fucking hell" used as you'd use "damn it!" or something in a sentence, to show frustration, etc. "Fucking hell, that hurt!" or "Fucking hell, my computer is being stubborn!"

I'll think of more, I'm sure. This was a great idea for a thread!

dalesys
01-28-2012, 09:07 AM
I forgot the one I use most often: holy moly! I don't even know where I got it from, and people around me have begun to pick it up.
Holy Moly - Quicksilver Messenger Service (Shady Grove) 1969. There's a song for everything!:p

Der Cute
01-28-2012, 09:22 AM
Hm.
Shitballs - frustrated cursing
GDMF - acronym only
GDMFSOB - acronym only
fuckles - slightly cheerier fuck "well, fuckles"
brain fart -a derp
bonehead - idiot
bug off
bastage
bugger
shite
sod
git
cnut
twat (too many British friends here)
schmuck
Have a Nice Day
Crapazoid
My little boogerhead
Fuzzybutt Plopcat (may she rest in peace)
Misha Kittygrrl
the shits (3 young girls who are rowdy and need some structure) so, how are the shits doing?

Jester
01-28-2012, 12:23 PM
Being from the West, I call just about everybody "dude" or "darlin'." This is an especially helpful habit since I am notoriously bad at remembering people's names.

For some reason, I often call women "love," though that is clearly not something I picked up out West. And no, I didn't pick it up from my British ex-fiance either. Nor did I pick up my common usage of "bloody" the way the Brits use it from her, either. Though I do use it a lot. Including a disproportionate amount of "bloody hell!" exclamations.

"Kick ass!" as an exclamation to denote awesomeness, or "kick ass" as an adjective to more directly indicate from whence the awesomeness came, such as "Tombstone was a kick ass movie!"

Despite my grammar nazi tendencies, I am notorious for saying, and typing, "I figgered" instead of "I figured." Along with various other permutations of the same word.

"Deeeeeeelicious!" Only ever used to describe a fantastic beer. No matter how yummy food is, beer is the only thing that ever gets the above description.

"Dumb phone." Used to describe my phone, which is not a smart phone. Therefore, dumb phone.

"I'm getting too old for this." Almost exclusively said at work.

"Try not. Do. Or do not. There is no try." I quote Yoda incessantly. Basically whenever anyone says "I'll try."

"Craptastic" and "craptastical." Self-explanatory.

"I have a hangover the size of Utah." Self-explanatory. And a frequently used phrase in my lexicon. There have been variations on it, including the most recent one, where I boasted as having a bladder the size of Utah. Considering I sat and watched football in a bar and drank beer for FIVE AND A HALF HOURS before I got up to go pee, I don't think I was overly exaggerating. :lol:

"Tasty" and "tastycakes." Used to describe attractive women I see. I.e., "Megan Fox is tasty, dude."

"Duh...WINNING!" Though that seems to be dying down somewhat lately.

"Boy, you just ain't right" or "there's something wrong with you boy!" said to just about any and all of my male friends. Because, well, it's true. Except Golf Boy. Something is wrong with him, because nothing seems to be wrong with him.

"What.....the.....FUCK?!?" Self-explanatory.

"Chowdah" instead of chowder, in the manner of a Boston accent, despite the fact that I do not and have never lived in Boston. Used for any and all chowders, no matter what their geographical origins.

"Douche" and "douchebag." Sadly, used a lot. Not that it's sad that I use it a lot. Rather, sad that there are so many people out there that fit the label so damn well that I have to use it so often.

"Liquid silk." Used to describe Johnnie Walker Blue Label scotch whenever it is discussed.

"Liquid candy." Used to describe a couple rums, specifically Brinley Gold Vanilla and Zaya Private Reserve.

"Descended from the heavens," "a gift from the gods," and "proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." Used to describe truly awesome beers, rums, and wines.

"Crack on a plate." Used to describe one of the best and most addictive appetizers at my bar. This is a recent one. Seems to work, because pretty much every time I use this phrase to describe the app in question to customers, they purchase it. And agree with it.

"Video crack." Video games. Especially the MegaTouch machines. Pretty much self-explanatory. Been using this one for years, as a video crackhead myself.

"Missed it by THAT much." Used often, this Get Smart reference goes over people's heads more often than I care to believe. Used whether I am really close or miss something by a country mile.

"Missed it by a country mile." Self-explanatory.

"I will smack the silly right off your face." Self-explanatory, used mostly with coworkers.

sms001
01-28-2012, 03:10 PM
Add another "W00t"-er to the list.
Doglicker.
Monkeyf**ker.
Woodbillies (Hillbillies, but they live in the woods here, not up in the hills...)
Jamoke
Jagoff (The 'G' is essential here. May be Philly or Pennsylvanian in general in origin, as I inherited it from my step-father.)
Recently added a couple of 'throwback' items to the insult lexicon: doodoo head and boogerhead.

Seriously? (Monumental incredulity.)
One of my fav's borrowed from our friends across the sea: gobsmacked

fab
epic
peerless

referencing pairs of things, people, animals, whatever: frick, frack or heckle, jeckle.

trios: winkin, blinkin, nod. larry, moe, curly.

we (wife and I) only have one common quartet in our lives (the horses) but for some reason they only get referenced in pairs: the 'Bigs', the 'Brownies' the 'B*tches' and the 'Girls' (which are a different pair from the 'B*tches :) )

Thanks for the thread Gazebo, I'm gonna use plenty of these!

protege
01-28-2012, 04:24 PM
Jagoff (The 'G' is essential here. May be Philly or Pennsylvanian in general in origin, as I inherited it from my step-father.)

I don't think I've ever heard "Jagoff" in the Philadelphia region. But, it does show up regularly in the Pittsburgh area (http://www.pittsburghese.com/)...quite frequently in fact. No doubt helped by the local media--WDVE loves that word :D

As for mine...

"Are you on crack?"
"Crack does NOT smoke itself"
"Are you fucking kidding me?"
"I'm not allowed to use a sledgehammer at work..."
"That's what she said"
"Do not want"

drunkenwildmage
01-28-2012, 04:38 PM
'Metric Shit Load'
'Awww.. Crap!'
'ummm..oops'
'Monkey Fucking a Football'
'Wait, what?!'
'Doh!'
'Searously?'
'awesomemating'
'well..that's not good'
'Dude, put the crack pipe down, and slowly back away'
'One stiff drink away from becoming a national news headline'
'they are a strong argument for birth control'
'nothing but the cheapest money can buy'

Eisa
01-28-2012, 08:43 PM
Umm. Hmm. I say a lot of weird things. :D Let's see...

I also say "fuck me sideways." Other variations: "fuck me raw, fuck me running."

I say awesomesauce! But I append -sauce to everything. Epicsauce, for instance. :D

"I will platonically grope/hump you so hard."

Whorebagel/slutpancake/tartwaffle/ho(r)crumpet.

"The power of Christ compels you!"

I occasionally call people love, darling, or lovely. As in, "Hallo, lovely!"

"I am disturbed."

"I will set a puma on you."

"ALL YOUR CATS ARE BELONG TO ME."

"I will high-five you...in the face...with a tractor." :devil:

"ARE TOO!.....D2." (That one is my nerdy friend's fault.)

"Dude, what the fuck?!"

"Douchewaffle, douchecannoe, twatwaffle, cuntbag..." yeah, I come up with a lot of very inventive swear words, to the point one of my friends cheers when I say a new one. :lol:

"Sweet as!"

"Wicked pissa!" Totally NOT from the right area, but I absolutely adore it. :D

"Don't be so bloody naff." David Tennant's fault. :p

I call stupid people bints... XD

I dunno, just random things...I'm very weird.

Irving Patrick Freleigh
01-28-2012, 08:45 PM
Hot dish = casserole. Apparently, Wisconsin is the only place where people say HOT DISH.



Actually, I understand that to be more of a Minnesota thing, and you are closer to Minnesota than I am.

I am on the opposite side of the state, and I have never heard anybody use that term to describe casserole.

A couple more:

"We needed (insert some item we already have too much of at the swamp) like I need a second asshole."

"May a squadron of beautiful vaginas find its way to your crotch by day's end." Permanently borrowed from The Oatmeal, and used to thank various male co-workers and friends for doing me favors.

Gumby30
01-28-2012, 09:29 PM
My Dad's family is from London, specifically the East End - therefors I use an amount of Cockney rhyming slang:

Be right there just got to brush my barnet (Barnet = Barnet fair = hair)
Anyone seen my kettle? (Kettle & hob = fob or fob watch)
I use the word bollocks quite a lot.
My default expression of frustration is usually a short sharp "GAH!"
Win - something awesome.
An annoying person is a wankbiscuit.
I use lolcat speech far too much as well.
And depsite my best efforts, several years of living and working in Essex have resulted in me using "innit" far more than I would like.

auntiem
01-28-2012, 11:20 PM
"Dumb as a bag of hammers" - self explanitory

"Hello, my name is auntiem I don't belive we've met..." - usually said to my SO when he suggests I do/think something out of character.

"Monkey balls!" I don't even know where I picked that up, but that is what popped out of my mouth the other day when I jammed my knee into the desk.

"Sucks to be you" - usually said to close friends when they are whinging on about something they don't need to like winning only $100 at the casino.

"maliciously unhelpful" - usually in reference to a particular company's "help" desk

This one has sound effects so I'll try: "I'm not screech screech crazy (doing a stabbing motion), I'm whoo whoo crazy (twirling by finger by my ear).

Other than that, I mostly quote movies often to people that have no idea the context or proper response. For example:

"There are flames on my car!" to which the proper response is "Serpantine!" (this one only really works with my Dad, but it shortcuts about 20 min of conversation and we both know exactly what it means).

"Before I drank I could not do this" (followed by some goofball dance move or preceeded by a spectaularly clumsy move) the proper response is "why would you want to do that?"

"...but this one goes to 11!"

"Waffles just pancakes with little square on 'em" - sorry, it must be said everytime anyone at the table orders waffles, which may explain why my SO never takes me to IHOP. Actually, if not stopped, I will sing the whole song truth be told.

"Let's get into trouble baby" (said in a smooth deep voice) but currently I've been substituting "Time to nut up or shut up".

Lindsey
01-28-2012, 11:29 PM
Most of these are specific to my boyfriend and I, although our circle of friends are privy to them as well.

Applesauce! (when super happy)
Apples! (same use as applesauce)
Taco salad (when unhappy)
Sadface ("I'm sorry to hear that")
Nom nom nom? (actually not to indicate dinner, usually say it to catch someone's attention...)
Derp derp! (can be "you're a derp", "it was super derpy", or out of context to grab someone's attention)

We also routinely talk like lolcats. Instead of having to go to the bathroom, we has to go potty.

My boyfriend and I joke that when he proposes, "applesauce!" will be a yes and "taco salad" would be a no :lol:

AdamAnt316
01-29-2012, 12:07 AM
A few which come to mind:

"Monkey's Uncle" Generic expletive. Example: "Son of a monkey's uncle!!!"
"Expletive!" or "Expletive Deleted!" See above.
"Pissss!!!" See above.
"Shit damn fuck!" or "Fuck shit dammit!" Not-so-generic expletive.
"Martha Faulkner!" Used in place of a certain, umm, Oedipal reference.
"Metric Fuckton" as opposed to a Standard or Imperial Fuckton.
"Junkmobile" Used to refer to my primary mode of transportation, due to the amount of stuff I tend to haul. Currently up to Junkmobile Mark IV.
"So smart, he's stupid!" Smart enough to get oneself into a predicament, but not quite smart enough to get themself out. Usually used to refer to my brother's cat.
"Dumber than a bag of stupid!" Used to denote extreme stupidity.

More to come as I think of them.

NorthernZel
01-29-2012, 12:15 AM
Lately, in order to keep the language clean in front of Lil Zel, we have tended to use the term "Oh coconuts!" (from a Disney cartoon for preschoolers) instead of "oh shit" or similar.

Much an eyebrow was raised today during a bowling tournament wherein Mr Zel loudly yelled "COCONUTS!!!!" once he flubbed a shot :lol:

Eisa
01-29-2012, 12:57 AM
^That reminds me how sometimes I yell "FINLAND!" or "son of a basket weaver!" when upset. :lol:

I also randomly quote The Princess Bride and Harry Potter apropos of nothing.

Have fun storming the castle! :D

Jester
01-29-2012, 02:10 AM
"Hello, my name is auntiem I don't belive we've met..."

I use about the same thing when one of my friends or coworkers asks something that I consider a dumb question, and the response indicates my opinion of their question.

For example:

"Are you having a beer after work?"
"Can I buy you a beer?"
"Are you going to be watching the Super Bowl?"

"Hi, I'm Jester...have we met?"

I think I've even used that on my Mom on some occasions.

I also randomly quote The Princess Bride and Harry Potter apropos of nothing.

"All I wanna do is have a little fun before I die," says the man next to me out of nowhere.

Have fun storming the castle!

My buddy Popcorn says this a lot, usually when he's leaving, or when someone else is leaving...and he always says it in a dry, almost derisive tone. "Yeah buddy...have fun storming the castle, okay?" Yeah. That way.

ApolloSZ
01-30-2012, 01:56 AM
Balls - Said in a low drawn out way. Usually when something failed or didn't go how I wanted.

"Deploy Emergency pants!" - either when mimicking what is happening on the wargaming table/xbox or after a particularly nasty sword blow is dodged.

"Waitnodammitstoparghwhodidcrap!" - Often varied. Usually when all hell breaks loose in a xbox session with friends. Apparently I say this in a very entertainly way.

Any time a friend mutters "God" "Oh God" "Jesus" etc, one of us will usually respond with "Yes?"

"Bollocks" - See Balls.

The others aren't coming to mind right now. That and the way we twist some phrases is not repeatable in polite company. So I will repeat them now.....





(Just kidding)

dragon_wings
01-30-2012, 01:59 AM
Oooo. ApolloSZ reminded me of another one.
My boyfriend started this one (as far as I know) and it caught on with me and then with my roommate.
When someone mentions 'god' as in 'thank god' one or all of us will say 'god has nothing to do with this.'

Jester
01-30-2012, 02:44 AM
Any time a friend mutters "God" "Oh God" "Jesus" etc, one of us will usually respond with "Yes?"

I do shit like this all the time, especially at work. A customer, for whatever reason, will invoke the name of a deity, and I will look up and deadpan, "No, my name's Jester. It's the beard....it confuses people." Or if I'm cleanshaven, "A common misconception."

antlan87
01-30-2012, 05:16 AM
"I'm too young to feel this old." I tend to say this a work a lot, usually after I have been lifting furniture, barbecues, etc, or running across the store, or after bringing in carts, in heavy snow or rain.

I often respond to "How are you?" with "Still crazy."

"Bring on the apocalypse!" This or something similar is said after seeing some of the crap that becomes popular on TV that supports my views that we are past our prime as the dominate race.

SongsOfDragons
01-30-2012, 12:51 PM
I tend to use a general term of endearment to everyone: Dumpling. And in this, a usual greeting from me will be: "Dumpling(s), you're alive!!" *hugs*

A phrase I borrowed from me mam is "Shit-arse-damn-and-bugger-it."

antlan87
01-30-2012, 03:58 PM
Any time a friend mutters "God" "Oh God" "Jesus" etc, one of us will usually respond with "Yes?"

I do this all the time myself, or I'll say "You called?".

^That reminds me how sometimes I yell "FINLAND!" or "son of a basket weaver!" when upset. :lol:

Reading this, and I immediately thought of Liu Bei, who was often insulted by his enemies calling him a "weaver of mats and shoes" denoting his humble origins despite his ancestral connection to the then ruling Dynasty. That reminded me of something I see and use as an insult, calling someone normal.

Kal
01-30-2012, 09:22 PM
My most common one is "Leave it be", which I find a useful phrase with kids and coworkers alike.
Beyond that I've a tendency for therefore and nevertheless which I just find to be satisfying words. Oh yes, and the phrase "Wheel's spinning but the hamster's dead" does tend to crop up quite a bit when dealing with customers.
I don't really swear but do tend to resort to "ye gods" when under stress; actually, thinking about it my blasphemy does tend to be in the plural for some reason.

BrenDAnn
01-30-2012, 10:01 PM
I thought of another one, because I said it today at work. "That worked well." I usually say it in a sarcastic, even tone when something doesn't go as planned. For example, I said it today at work when I dropped a box instead of loading it onto the dolly/cart/two-wheeler/whateverthefuckyoucallit as I had planned. My response was to look at the box, shake my head, pick it back up and mutter "That worked well!" to myself.

auntiem
01-31-2012, 12:34 AM
I forgot one: "slap your mama good" I have no idea where I picked that up, it sounds Southern to me, but I've never been to the South.
That phrase is my go-to restaurant review if I really like the place.

CalyCoRose
01-31-2012, 12:38 AM
The word I use all the time is: SHEESH. It's my favorite word to use. Usually said in an exasperate tone. :D

The other word I use a lot of, is FOOK.

Sapphire Silk
01-31-2012, 02:49 AM
I like to steal a lot of Britishisms:

I daresay
Brilliant
Wot
and so on

Fabulous is a word I use a lot to express enthusiasm.

Great Googly Moogly is an expression I use when profanity is inappropriate (needless to say, I use this one alot).

Sucks to be you = No sympathy from me, dumbass.

Butt nugget = variant on asshat

Irving Patrick Freleigh
01-31-2012, 02:52 AM
Great Googly Moogly is an expression I use when profanity is inappropriate (needless to say, I use this one alot).


My co-workers preferred wanna-swear-but-can't expression is "Buckets of Christmas Trees!"

Don't ask.

One from me: That's craptacular/craptastic/shittacular/durr hurr hurr--that's stupid.

Food Lady
01-31-2012, 02:58 AM
One of my favorites (my mom's) is "uglier than homemade sin." I always think, "as opposed to store-bought sin?"

taurinejunkie
01-31-2012, 03:35 AM
Being a Quebecker, I have the ability* to pronounce the Quebec Swearwords properly and rarely abstain from doing so. Most of my non-profanity slang and such comes from the Internet, e.g. "BUS! Y U NO RUN ON TIME!"

* In my opinion, if you're a Quebecker you will pronounce them right very naturally; if you're not, you can get "close enough" but you'll never get them perfectly right.

Here's a basic lesson (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9U72QVCgh_Q) from a Quebec/Ontario-made movie (featuring some police brutality). The balding guy is from Ontario, the two others are Quebeckers, both cops are bilingual.

bhskittykatt
01-31-2012, 05:03 AM
My co-workers preferred wanna-swear-but-can't expression is "Buckets of Christmas Trees!"


When my CW had a kid and needed a wanna-swear-but-can't expression, she started using "God bless America."

Seraph
02-01-2012, 12:26 PM
Derp, meep, blargh, "friiiiiiiiick", and "holy refried <insert various items here>". I use them *way* too much, lol.

dragon_wings
02-01-2012, 02:03 PM
After the past two days I realize I say 'Srly?' a lot. Usually said really sarcastically. What can I say? My misanthropy causes severe sarcasm.

Treasure
02-01-2012, 03:25 PM
Seriously?! = used to denote disbelief / exasperation

damn = usually in multiples = frustration

bugger-it bugger-it, millennium hand-in-shrimp! = i believe this comes from DragonLance novels, its used as an expression of self-frustration

Hell's Bells!(and boggy muck) = exasperation, usually when things refuse to go right.

"The Bitch ain't square!" = this is my dad's battle cry when doing any remodeling on the house, because apparently there are no truly square angles/corners in the house... used anytime things don't line up the way they should

"Oh Missy!" = cut short from "Oh Missy did you know......!?!?" = used to make my dad feel old

(Metric) Fuckton/shitton = large amounts

Squee = express joy or happiness

Squeek! = discomfort

Bun! Of a snitch! = a spoonerism of Son of Bitch

Son a whore! = self explanatory

Yarg! Blargle! = picked up from here, said in a monotone, often used as filler

friggedy-fraggedy - usually used when describing malfunctioning machinery

Have you met me?(him/her) = sarcastic, as a response to someone suggesting something out of character for the person in question

"I thought we raised her better than that" = said almost exclusively to my brother, about our mother; ironic, because obviously we did not raise our mother

"Oh Honey..." - I'm from the south, it has a variety of uses, depending on inflection.

"ruck me funning!" - another spoonerism - "f*%k Me Running" = another one with a variety of applications, can be added to, the more creative the better.

"And THAT, God..." = stolen from my parents; basically means that I'm done doing whatever bs menial repetitive task that doesn't need to be done, and if you ask me to another thing, i'm going to snap; used more or less as a warning

"ae'ah!" - its a "mom" noise(like a vocal, "buzzer") - I use it to get people to stop whatever they're about to do wrong; also useful on animals.

"Indeed" - depending on tone, multiple uses, particularly when i'm inebriated... example "hey i have a great idea" "Indeed?" "we should go get food" "Indeed." "uhm.. maybe I should drive?" "Indeed!"

CalyCoRose
02-02-2012, 12:23 PM
One phrase I say a lot: "My tang got toungled."

This is said when I'm trying to talk, and I mangle whatever it is I was trying to convey. :D

Kanalah
02-02-2012, 02:27 PM
Let's see...

I live in the south, so I use sweetheart, sweetie, honey, babe, pumpkin, etc as a term of endearment.

"Imma clutching my pearls" - usually when something is pretend shocking.

"Meh"

"I have dined sufficently" - said by my late grandfather when he was full. The kids and I have picked it up to honor him.

"Fabricgasm" - I saw fabric I liked and I just had to have it. Sometimes I have multiple fabricgasms in the same store.

"Bloody!" and other random british slang like "wanker"

I do occasionally say LOL or Srsly (said like Cereslee)

I have picked up the phrases "some people's children" and "douchcanoe" from CS.

sms001
02-04-2012, 12:21 AM
..."Jagoff" ....the Pittsburgh area...quite frequently in fact. No doubt helped by the local media--WDVE loves that word :D


Thanks, makes sense. He was a steel man in his youth. And I can well imagine it has found a place as a "sub" cussword. :)


'One stiff drink away from becoming a national news headline'


Stolen!



millennium hand-in-shrimp!

Foul Old Ron from Discworld perhaps?

DGoddessChardonnay
02-04-2012, 12:39 AM
Four words:

That's what she said.

:D

Are you related to a certain guy who drives a bulk truck for Pepsi?:p

Some of mine are:

"I'm having a blonde moment . . ." - when I do something so amazing, I've amazed myself.:p

"I've heard farts louder than that . . ." - directed at anything that buzzes by, especially those little annoying ricer cars

"You are the same old mess . . . " always directed at that one coworker (Butt-Head)

"I need to be rocked, burped and put to bed" - after I've ate all I want

"You didn't eat THAT here . . ." whenever I'm subjected to one of those "silent but deadlys":eek:

And yes, being in the South I'm guilty of using those endearments (honey, dear, sweetie, et al.) But then a lot of my customers do the same, so it's all good.;)

ApolloSZ
02-07-2012, 11:53 PM
CalyCoRose - I went to a speech therapist when I was little. I didn't form my words properly. These days I (still sometimes have that) and start speaking, and thinking ahead, so I start speaking ahead. So when I get confused it usually devolves to
"And he was going to (destination) the at his afternnn... pluhpluh blu... bleh... And he was going to {destination} this afternoon"

I'm also encouraging my friends to start using
"Good sir, please depart, and fornicate with thyne self." = "Go f**k yourself"

taurinejunkie
02-08-2012, 12:12 AM
Reminds me, I semi-frequently use Ducreux-isms.

Mytical
02-08-2012, 05:34 AM
I guess I have two catch phrases I use...

1) Sometimes I worry about you..other times I REALLY worry about you.

2) Conga Rats.

ParkingWitch
02-08-2012, 06:28 AM
Oh Bite Me
Kiss my entire freckled ... I never specify which part though

and when particularly annoyed by someone at work, but never when anyone could hear,

Mother loving son of a leprotic goat.

Kara
02-08-2012, 07:00 PM
Let's see....

Anyone who's read my stories in Sucky Customers (I miss having stories) knows a lot of my varients of asshat: assbeast, assgoblin, asslord, assqueen, and the infamous Captian Assbeard.


My bestie is from Alabama, thanks to her I now say "yall" pretty frequently.

Due to my job, I use some radio codes in regular conversation, usually 10-4 because that's one everyone knows. But I also say "10-22" (disregard) and "10-9" (repeat that).

And Lupo taught me to use "mew?" when I'm confused about something. And "mew!" when frustrated.

Most of my lil sayings have already been mentioned.

chrislb
02-09-2012, 12:45 AM
Whenever someone says God in my presence I usually say in the creepiest way possible "There is no God here" like that vampire in 30 days of night.
When things are going pretty bad I will say assteriffic or asstacular.
I also measure things by fucktons.
I don't usually say meh instead I say poop in the same tone.
If I like you I will probably call you pookie at some point, that or chubbers. Both names of kittens that I have been lucky to love.
I also use dattebayo and the nice guy thumbs up when being sarcastic.

Zellie Crescent
02-09-2012, 02:15 AM
I call people booger as an insult, I say it the same way as asshole or shithead.

dragon_wings
03-05-2012, 11:00 PM
Instead of 'maybe' I tend to say 'perhaps'.
And as an affirmative (instead of 'yes'/'yeah'/etc.) I use 'indeed'.

taurinejunkie
03-05-2012, 11:10 PM
dragon_wings: Classy!

Sometimes when I read what my customers write, I mutter to myself: "English, mother *mumble* do you speak it?"

dragon_wings
03-05-2012, 11:29 PM
@tj: *curtsies* ^_^

Primer
03-06-2012, 12:57 AM
As a teacher, I've had to revise some of my language.

Bless it!
Fudgecicles!
Triple thick fudgecicles!
Shastikovitch!

are all epithets.

That inhales with great velocity! (that sucks hard)

When driving, if somebody does something to endanger me, then they are a f*ckwad, otherwise, just an idiot or an asshole. If somebody passes me, seriously exceeding the speed limit, it's "Buh Bye."

All of my dogs are "<name>-butt" or just "doggy-butt"

When somebody asks how I'm doing, "I'm doing. Somehow." or "I was doing better, but then I got over it."

FuzzyKitten99
03-06-2012, 03:03 AM
I also quote HP for various things/situations.

Other phrases you might hear from me:
*Frick! - Elliot from Scrubs used to say this all the time. Nice for saying around kids.
*Genius at work! - for those who are nominated, should be nominated, or have/will win a Darwin Award, or a general warning to those around them
*If only common sense could be made into a rufie. - I made this one up
*You can throw glitter on a turd but it won't turn it into a diamond - describing various situations accordingly
*Is there an echo in here? -for when someone repeats my question as part of their answer.
*Can't live with 'em, can't kill 'em.
*Fargin' Sneaky Bastages!
*Fuckin' Fucker(s) - one of my regular customers says this all the time so now I seem to say it
*Smoke 'em if you got 'em!!

I am sure I have more that I am just not thinking about right now...

Bella_Vixen
03-07-2012, 12:53 AM
Becks almost died laughing the other day when I screamed "what the diddly?!?" (instead of wtf) at some jerk when we were driving into GB.

MoonCat
03-09-2012, 02:33 AM
At home we sometimes use "Cheese and crackers got all muddy!!" instead of Jesus Christ God Almight...

Or "Seneca Bridge!" instead of son of a bitch...

ApolloSZ
03-10-2012, 07:41 AM
"How are you let out unsupervised?!" usually exclaimed after a particularly..... taxing... phonecall from one of those users...

Chazzie
03-10-2012, 09:41 AM
Bollocks! = Originally started as my 'safe word' at work, now I just use it whenever something goes wrong. It's actually quite therapeutic. :lol:
What is this I don't even-- = Popular internet meme to express total utter confusion over something. Sometimes replaced with "I only sometimes even-"
Shark Week = How I describe my monthy visitor. Sometimes this is replaced with "Raising the Communist flag for the week".
Lamebuckets = I have no idea when I started saying this, but rather self explanatory. Just to describe that something is lame.
I don't know how to deal with (*)! = Something from Soul Eater. Usually suffixed with something completely ridiculous and random in terms of gaming, such as "I don't know how to deal with zombies' heads popping off! I don't know how to deal with running out of ammo!"

firecat88
03-10-2012, 04:25 PM
Just thought of a few more of my -isms.

"What the crap/frell/frack?"

"But...but...but...ehn!!!"

"Sweet flying crapsicles (on a stick)!" - This one largely depends on the context. Usually a good thing and followed by "That was awesome."

"Oh em squee!" or 'Ohmysquee'

"Yeeeeeeeaaaaaaaahno. Thought about it, aaaaaaaaaand no."

"I will now sing the 'My Computer Is A Piece o' Crap' song."

I also tend to grab quotes from things I like. Examples:

When asked how I slept, I will, depending on the person, reply "On my back." Which, in my case, comes from the movie Newsies.

"Right. I'm gonna go...away from you." from an episode of Young Hercules, used when a friend has said something so brain-breaking that the only option is to go 'over there'.

"And for my next trick- Anvils!" Anyone familiar with Dresden Files will know this one.

Kristev
03-11-2012, 08:14 AM
Fiddlesticks.

Well, that's what I get for trying to . . .

Story of my life.

Why am I not surprised?

Oh my.

Slap two dogs with one claw.

HappyFun Ball
03-11-2012, 09:41 AM
Fuckweasle- One who manipulates for sex
Butthurt- Unjust offended feeling
Ah, Goddamnit- frustrated cry
Trichomonasis- A why of insulting someone with a medical term
Life neutral- That point in life where you're not suicidal, but you aren't going to take great measure to save your life.

Treasure
03-13-2012, 04:38 PM
"For the Love of Skittles!" used instead of "for the love of diety/pete"
"Jiminy Cricket!"/ "Jiminy Christmas" - instead of "Jesus Christ" being used as an expletive

Jesus H tap-dancing Christ on a pogo stick - I don't use this one as much anymore, but its one of those you know when/where its appropriate

crap-on-a-cracker - used in response to a shitty situation

"awesome 'possum" - when things are good


I've used "perhaps" in stead of "maybe"
my sister and i also play the "thesaurus" game... where we start with 1 word (like maybe) and then go through the various ways of saying the same thing

BeenThereDoneThat
03-15-2012, 02:38 AM
I will have to write down some of mine as I think of them...right now I can only think of lame ones. I have a good story though...

A late friend of mine (she was an older woman, so not so unusual that she died but it happened fast... :( anyway...) liked to tell this story. She grew up in Virginia and her very southern grandma would sometimes get irked and yell "SUGAR! S-H-I-T, SUGAR!" So...when my friend went to school...guess what word she was asked to spell. :doh: :roll:

Bandit
03-15-2012, 02:44 AM
"We'll burn that bridge when we get to it"
"Motherforking Copsocker!"
"Run for your life! Management at the (router) console!"
(answering the phone from someone I know can take a joke) "(random nation) Embassy. How can I mis-direct your call?"


B

cashierbex
03-15-2012, 05:14 AM
-Any variation of animal sounds. My friend and I have this ongoing thing when we text each other.
-"Oh Johnny Christ"- instead of Jesus Christ, I say a member of my fav band's stage name.
-Mr. Arf Arf and Arf Arf Jr- while speaking to my puppies Sterling and Karuso
- Thats What She Said
-Meh
-True
-Blah and some other variations