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View Full Version : Inconvenient truths for the stupid person in charge of the HOA.


RecoveringKinkoid
03-26-2012, 01:32 PM
I should start with an inconvenient truth for me, actually. And that truth is that I must face the fact that the person in charge of the loosely cobbled together covenant on my street is a complete and total idiot.

So, about two weeks ago, I called Animal Control on a pack of dogs that was trying to dig under my neighbor's fence to get at his dog.

Cue this very stupid woman, who is the current head of the HOA on my street, coming over to my house to complain that I shouldn't have called Animal Control because two of the dogs involved belonged to her next door neighbors and had gotten out. Her reasoning is "you don't want to incur bad blood with your neighbors."

1. Like I knew that.
2. Like it matters.
3. Fuck her.

My end of the street is having a lot of problems with unleashed and stray dogs. I won't bore you with the pages and pages of incidents, but suffice it to say there have been no fewer than five dog attacks on my street that I know about. Plus, there is a huge dog fighting problem in the area.

Things are getting really bad here.

She didn't know any of this, not surprisingly. So I wrote her a four page document detailing each and every incident that I am aware of and hand delivered it to her, saying that since she was so concerned about all this, she needed to get the HOA on board and "thanks for being so concerned" and "I know you'll want to address this problem immediately."

I know, I'm such a bitch, right?

Anyways, this person who is so concerned about "bad blood" regularly goes up and down the street gossiping and talking smack about the people who live here. Fortunately, she's not exactly known as a credible source.

She now thinks that since she and I had words, my good friend up the street "won't wave at her now." :rolleyes: I asked my friend...she does not know what this woman looks like and wouldn't recognize her if she saw her. Nor did my friend know we'd had words.

I guess some people never really outgrow junior high school.

This past weekend, HOA idiot had to go down and talk to someone on our street about problems with their dog getting out. Evidently, a vicious dog got out, went up the street, and wreaked havoc with some of HOA idiot's pets. Nice. How does that karma taste, bitch? I would have loved to have been a fly on the wall for that conversation.

Wonder if she called Animal Control?

Anyways, this is rambling and incoherent, I know. I just can't detail it all out in short form. I just wanted to rant. I think it's kind of delicious that she wanted to come over here and give me grief about trying to keep my neighbor's dog from being attacked, and now she's having to have her nose rubbed right in the problem.

Andara Bledin
03-26-2012, 05:25 PM
So, Karma's serving up a nice big batch of humble pie with a side of crow, huh?

The main problem with HOAs is that the people who work to get on the board of an HOA are usually exactly the people you never want in charge of anything.

^-.-^

RecoveringKinkoid
03-27-2012, 03:53 AM
When she took that office, I admit I thought she'd do a good job. She'd stuck her nose into my business with other neighbors in the past, but I cut her some slack on that for simply being the sort of person who is trying to keep peace.

I have since had to face the hard facts that she is anything but. I don't see her long in that office. She's not doing anything but sitting on her ass. Which is good, I guess, because every time she leaves the house, she alienates someone.

She actually came over here with a veiled threat of "you don't want to piss off the wrong people."

Really?

My answer to her was "the wrong people are already pissed off."

She really doesn't know me all that well. She's getting schooled right now.

LillFilly
03-27-2012, 04:21 AM
It's really brilliant how she got a taste of what others are going through.

Hmm, how to lure those dogs back to her place again? Maybe you could spritz her with 'Eu de Bacon' or something...:rolleyes:

Midorikawa
03-29-2012, 09:26 PM
On behalf of someone currently ripping their hair out over their HOA, I'm sorry.

I'm about to go to the HOA meeting next Thursday and suggest firing the guy (and the management company he works for) I've been dealing with.

RealUnimportant
03-30-2012, 06:51 AM
...I shouldn't have called Animal Control because two of the dogs involved belonged to her next door neighbors and had gotten out. Her reasoning is "you don't want to incur bad blood with your neighbors."
Yeah, because your neighbour's mutts being allowed to run rampant was fostering SO much goodwill...

I hate people that can't or won't keep proper control of their dogs; I had the unfortunate honour of watching a neighbour's little yapper utterly destroy my host's new kitten once; poor thing was chomped & treated like a rag doll, but managed to drag itself away & hide once I scared the dog off... We never saw it again though, so could only assume it found a quiet place to die :( Neighbour appeared to be all out of fucks, as none were given.

Seraph
03-30-2012, 12:06 PM
My answer to her was "the wrong people are already pissed off."

Oh dang. I literally got a spine chill when I read this. :D

PepperElf
03-30-2012, 01:26 PM
i especially like how she thought uncontrolled dogs roaming the street was not a problem... until it affected HER.

RecoveringKinkoid
03-30-2012, 02:41 PM
i especially like how she thought uncontrolled dogs roaming the street was not a problem... until it affected HER.

Thank you! Exactly!

What actually happened was that I came out on my deck to investigate a huge racket I hear while I'm upstairs trying to work on something, and lo and behold there is a FUCKING DOGFIGHT on my back deck, inside my fenced and latched yard. They'd dug under the fence and decided to have a cage match three feet from my back door.

So I deal with that, go pick up my kid from school, come home and see the same pack of dogs trying to enter the dude across the street's fenced backyard, where he had his dog fenced in.

So I called animal control at that point before my neighbor's dog was attacked and his property damaged. Something I pointed out to the HOA Genius up the street that I'm sure she'd like done for her if it were HER property and HER pet in danger.

Anyways, because two of these dogs happened to belong to friends of hers, I was in the wrong for calling AC.

Essentially, she didn't stop to consider that

1. There was no way to know what dog belonged to whom. Not that it really would have mattered, in this case.
2. I might have a very good reason for calling for help.
3. Maybe she's a dim witted moron that doesn't think things through.


Anyways, this person who doesn't want bad blood between neighbors has been running up and down the street shit talking anyone who will listen about me, other people who live here, and people she doesn't even know. It's gotten so bad that if you're talking to someone who lives here and start a sentence with the phrase "(HOA Genius) says..." They automatically roll their eyes because everyone here thinks she's an idiot that says crazy shit.

So it amuses me that her stance is "The avoidance of bad blood."

She brings her ass down here to my house again, it ain't gonna go well for her. It didn't go all that well last time, and I think she's intimidated. And I was actually nicer than she deserved that time, so I doubt she's got the balls to come her ass back down here. She's gonna get herself more bad fucking blood than she wants.

We shall see. I'll keep you posted.

XCashier
03-30-2012, 03:05 PM
The main problem with HOAs is that the people who work to get on the board of an HOA are usually exactly the people you never want in charge of anything.
Which is precisely why I want to be sure that any house I buy in the future does NOT have an HOA attached. They are more trouble than they're worth.

Rapscallion
03-30-2012, 03:38 PM
Are there any authorities overseeing the actions of HOAs, or are they merely civil?

Rapscallion

RecoveringKinkoid
03-30-2012, 04:29 PM
It's not one of these big formal deals. I never even signed anything buying the house. There are papers, but to my knowledge, nobody's using them to bully anyone.

Basically, it says you won't keep junked cars on your lawn (something that the friends of the HOA Genius who's dogs were out running amok are doing right now, I might add. Evidently, that's okay.), have transients living in camper trailers in your driveway, have lifestock on your property, and let your house and yard fall into disrepair and neglect. No trailers, no animal farms, no junkyards. It's nothing crazy, and everything on it is reasonable.

Nothing on the HOA agreement is actually being broken. So for her to come down here bitching at me is simply her minding someone's business that doesn't' concern her, something she's done on more than once occasion.

She is unfit for her post. Which actually disappoints me.

PepperElf
03-30-2012, 05:06 PM
yeah it sounds more like a case of... she has a bit of power and thinks that means she can control other things too.


some HOAs *are* good - ensuring the neighborhood looks good and no one jerk is drawing the property value down for everyone else.

the problem is... many get very nit-picky about small details, or - like your HOA rep - start making up their own rules to enforce on others, or enforce rules depending on social standing, etc.

RecoveringKinkoid
03-30-2012, 08:56 PM
Well, really, though, this doesn't have anything to do with that. I only mentioned it because as the person in charge of harmony on the street, she should be the last person walking around starting shit with people that have nothing to do with her.

I could see it if she was, say, coming down there to talk to me about some rule violation (like the junked cars on her buddy's lawn that she's been so far quiet about). But she's not. She's walking around trying to stir up shit with people.

Get this: She went across to the street (to another neighbor she's managed to alienate) and told THAT woman that she'd dressed me down about my shabby yard.

First of all, she didn't say shit to me about my yard.
Secondly, my yard is gorgeous. So :wtf: (which was the neighbor's response to her.)
And thirdly, what we discussed is really neither here nor there. If she really was speaking to me in the capacity of the HOA, then shouldn't that conversation be confidential? How is that anyone's business but mine?

Then she told my husband that my friend C up the street is shunning her. My friend wouldn't know this idiot from Adam. In fact, my friend's response when I casually asked her "Hey, C, do you know HOA Genius up the street?" Was to get a little embarrassed and say "No. I know I probably should know who that is. What house does she live in?"

Yeah. Shunning her. Right.

I didn't tell C why I asked that. She doesn't need to stress over a stupid person showing her ass. HOA Genius thinks I ran to C and said nasty things about her(HOA Genius) behind her back. She thinks that because that's the way SHE operates and people (particularly stupid people) tend to assume everyone is just like them.

Dips
03-30-2012, 09:15 PM
She's just too stupid to realize she's already lost whatever battle she thought she was fighting.

Geeze, your yard IS gorgeous!

Kogarashi
03-30-2012, 09:17 PM
She's just too stupid to realize she's already lost whatever battle she thought she was fighting.

Geeze, your yard IS gorgeous!

What Dips said, on both counts.

Cazzi
03-30-2012, 09:26 PM
HOA woman seriously needs her eyes testing... NOW!

That is one hell of a gorgeous garden :)

Der Cute
03-30-2012, 10:22 PM
I love those colors!

RecoveringKinkoid
03-31-2012, 12:23 AM
Thank you, folks! I got a freebie this year, we didn't have much of a winter, so everything got a head start. Not a whole lot of winter damage or mess. A little trimming, a little weeding, throw a little Miracle Gro on a few things, and boom. Already we got this going on here. :)

The colors change throughout the year. Got a lot of cherry-red and blue in the summer. By the time Halloween rolls around, everything's orange and yellow.

Went out and bought a lot of red and white and lime-green just this morning. :D

Dumbshit probably takes exception to the fact that I let my little kid paint my flowerpots. That, and I have a fondness for heavily weathered terra cotta.

Kanalah
03-31-2012, 12:32 AM
RK, as someone who has no green thumb whatsoever...

oh my gosh I want you to make my house not look all stupid.

RecoveringKinkoid
03-31-2012, 01:42 AM
I'm essentially a pretty lazy gardener. Choose plants that do well in your climate without too much fuss. That's pretty much the trick. Because when you throw a plant wherever you can dig a hole, you're spread pretty thin as far as maintenance goes. I don't own any high maintenance plants. The most babying I do is throw my coffee grinds into those azaleas you're looking at every morning to counteract the alkalinity from the house foundation. That, and trim the hell out that variegated ivy you see there so it doesn't rip the molding off my house. Which it will do if I don't stay on top of it. Evidently, at this point last fall, I really needed to trim it, it's messy.

But it's pretty, though. Worth it. Everyone told me not to grow it up the side of my house on the bricks. I did it anyways, and now everyone has Ivy Envy when they come over here and see this glorious, wild wall of greenery. :D

Anyways, while I'm showing off my shabby, shitty, slum-like eyesore of a yard, Here's a similar shot I took last October. I think it's fun to see how my gardens change season to season, so sometimes I take pics when different stuff blooms. Here, the azaleas are not in bloom, but the mums are going crazy. And I can see that the lemon cypress (one of my favorite things...it's the little lime-green "Christmas tree" in the blue pot) has gotten larger since last fall.

I have discovered that dumbass does not like my bottle tree (not shown). Given her behavior, she's probably afraid of becoming trapped in it.

LillFilly
03-31-2012, 01:53 AM
I LOVE your garden! I also like those low-maintenance vines, things that grow from bulbs like iris', etc. And freebies. I dig-up patches of ground cover that grow where I work and let it fill-in at my house. I want to try the moss growing thing too.

I think HOA is seriously jealous about your flowers. Or thinks that every plant should be 1-flower per pot in order of tallest to shortest in only pastel colors. :rolleyes:

Andara Bledin
03-31-2012, 02:12 AM
Bottle tree, or bottle brush tree?

I was attacked by a bottle brush tree as a kid and ever since then, I give them quite a wide berth. o.0

^-.-^

XCashier
03-31-2012, 02:21 AM
RK, your garden is exquisite! You must get lots of hummingbirds and butterflies with all those beautiful flowers. When we get a house, I hope to have as beautiful a yard as yours. :)

RecoveringKinkoid
03-31-2012, 02:47 AM
Yeah, I totally want to try the moss growing thing, too. I have a shade garden in the back that might be a good place to try that.

HOA's yard is nice, but it's extremely spare. She's got some nice plants, and they are neat and tidy and stay very obediently where she put them and they have plenty of room to themselves. A wide expanse of grass, edged in neat borders of perfectly lined-up border plants.

In other words, her tastes in what makes a pretty yard are vastly different than mine." I prefer riotous color and curvy lines and sweeping shapes. I like surprises and whimsey. IShe likes order and neatness and straight lines. However, unlike her, I don't see "different" as "wrong.

I doubt she's jealous of my flowers. I think she's let herself get so bitter over the years she's lost the ability to see them. And I say that with quite a bit of pity.

I mean a bottle tree (http://www.appalachianhistory.net/2010/10/bottle-tree.html). I have a small one of about half a dozen cobalt blue bottles on it tucked into that hedge further down. It's only about four foot high and it's easy to miss if you don't know it's there, because it's one of my "surprise" items that's hidden in my garden (my garden is filled with all sorts of things you can't see right off. Grotesques, colorful mushrooms made of glazed pottery a friend made for me, "mermaid stones" (water-colored glass marbles). Fun stuff you have to look for to see. So it's not like there's this weird, eerie-ass piece of folk art standing in the middle of my front yard (and even if it was, there's no rule against it). It's tucked between an oleander bush and a "banana" shrub that happens to be blooming right now...which means instead of seeing a beautiful emerald bush with yellow flowers on it and smelling like bananas and vanilla, and instead of seeing a whimsical surprise full of blue glass and sunlight, she saw a bunch of empty wine bottles that needed to go in the trash can. If that's not worth some pity right there, I don't know what is.

She's like gollum. You'd punch her lights out if she wasn't so fucking pathetic.


RK, your garden is exquisite! You must get lots of hummingbirds and butterflies with all those beautiful flowers. When we get a house, I hope to have as beautiful a yard as yours. :)

Thank you! I do get lots of both. I have some butterfly bushes, and I have learned that there is a very good reason they are named that!

dragon_wings
04-01-2012, 07:11 PM
Wow! I'm not very outdoorsy but I can appreciate a beautiful garden or landscape. And damn. I love the colors. *sighs happily*

Sapphire Silk
04-02-2012, 01:19 AM
Which is precisely why I want to be sure that any house I buy in the future does NOT have an HOA attached. They are more trouble than they're worth.

Amen to that. I'm not in one, but my shithead neighbors ARE. My house is in an older but quaint neighborhood where every house is different, lots of trees, bushes and color but on the border of a new neighborhood with cookie cutter houses with bad vinyl siding jobs, no trees and ugly, ugly, ugly.

Are there any authorities overseeing the actions of HOAs, or are they merely civil?

Rapscallion

It's strictly civil, but if it's a strict HOA, then they can levy fines. If you refuse to pay, they can foreclose on your house. I bought the house I did in part because there is no HOA.

It's not one of these big formal deals. I never even signed anything buying the house. There are papers, but to my knowledge, nobody's using them to bully anyone. .

Be very careful about this. CCR's often transfer along with the deed for a certain period of time, regardless of whether you sign for them or not.

Usually they are no longer enforceable after a specific period of time (twenty years or so) or if the HOA becomes defunct.

Love your yard, Kinkoid. Gorgeous. :D I'm like you; lazy about gardening. I'm happy if I can just keep the grass mowed. I did plant a couple of cedars in my side yard with the hope that eventually they will grow large enough to block sight of an ugly shed in my neighbor's yard.

Seraph
04-02-2012, 04:11 PM
It's strictly civil, but if it's a strict HOA, then they can levy fines. If you refuse to pay, they can foreclose on your house. I bought the house I did in part because there is no HOA.


This.

I have a very distinct and clear memory of my friend's father blowing a gasket and literally going after the HOA rep when they were fined $1,000 for leaving their garage door open halfway, after 8 pm.

LillFilly
04-02-2012, 04:16 PM
This HOA stuff reminds me of when my dad was the president of the HOA at our condo; brand-new building where the HOA was formed to choose and oversee maintenance, landscaping, etc. In truth, dad was the ONLY thing standing between the tenants and a feudal society! The other HOA members wanted to dictate what colors you could paint your walls (these were condos you OWNED and that you had even chosen the layout and flooring of!), whether or not renters should have the same 'rights' as owners such as, could they own dogs, or should the dogs be animals not over a certain size; could you have children there, etc.. There were some real busy-bodies in that group that wanted the place run like a retirement community! A year or so later, the other members of the HOA wanted dad to step down as president (he kept thwarting them, was keeping the cost of dues down,chose the better maintenance companies rather than cheapest). He did so graciously, watched the HOA dissolve into anarchy, then became president again when other members of the HOA and most of the building BEGGED him to! :devil: He's stepped-down for good now, but the board still comes to him for advice instead of the new president.

You know what's funny? The tenants who messed things up, then bitched to the HOA about it being broken. This one owner fancied himself an electrician and tried to rewire the parking gate that was malfunctioning, but was new and still under warranty and was scheduled to be fixed. However, his meddling made the problem worse and voided the warranty! But noooo, the gate company was the bad guy!

Oh hey, does anyone know what those ornamental trees that droop like weeping willows are? Umbrella trees I think they're called, but they get about 6 feet tall and have flowers in the spring?

Seraph
04-02-2012, 05:43 PM
Oh hey, does anyone know what those ornamental trees that droop like weeping willows are? Umbrella trees I think they're called, but they get about 6 feet tall and have flowers in the spring?

I think so, my neighbors have one, poor thing had JUST flowered when we got the severe hailstorm. Now its bare again. :|

I'll ask them if I see them anytime soon, they're pretty nonexistent though. <.<

Edit: They have a Weeping Cherry tree.

http://www.landscapinggallery.info/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/Weeping-Cherry-Tree3.gif

AnaKhouri
04-02-2012, 08:18 PM
It's a weeping cherry, we have one in our front yard.

Oh, Seraph beat me to it.

LillFilly
04-03-2012, 03:21 AM
Yes! That's it. Though I probably have too many trees already; I've just planted a patch of Paw Paw (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Asimina_triloba). It's the largest fruit native to north america I believe. Kinda like a papaya. Should be interesting, because the flowers smell like rotting meat!

Becks
04-03-2012, 03:24 AM
This reminds me of the epic thread on etiquettehell.com that I can NEVER seem to find anymore.

Andrew B.
04-03-2012, 05:56 AM
My house also has a weeping cherry tree. It's beautiful in the spring.

XCashier
04-03-2012, 09:20 AM
This reminds me of the epic thread on etiquettehell.com that I can NEVER seem to find anymore.
Yes, I remember that thread; another reason I never want an HOA. That weirdo was on a total power trip and insisting on forcing someone who wasn't even an HOA member (and was just outside the HOA neighborhood) to comply with her rigid conformist ideals. Ugh!

I understand about enforcing rules about not keeping junked cars and other garbage in the yard, letting your house rot, bringing down property values and making the whole neighborhood look trashy. I completely understand that, and would totally comply with that.

It's the other extreme that worries me. Every house absolutely identical, down to the precise placement of the flowers and the exact shade of (ugh) beige to paint the walls. BORING!!!

I live in a rather eclectic city, and I like seeing how some people decorate their homes and yards. I've seen striking murals and stained glass windows on private homes, fences made with stone mosaics, beautiful rambling gardens like RK has with local plants, etc. It would be a shame to obliterate individual expression like that.

RecoveringKinkoid
04-03-2012, 02:37 PM
Indeed it would. I'm a creative person an self expression is beautiful to me. I actually did an anthropology project in college on folk art. My subject was yard decoration, particularly (but not limited to) mailboxes.

Some people have too much (to my eye) crap in their yard, but hey, that's their right. To each their own. It's obviously not too much crap to THEIR eye, and their eye is what's important regarding their property. So I guess it's best those folks avoid strict neighborhoods.

Like I said, clearly my neighbor does not appreciate cottage gardens (although that was not the point of contention in our discussion, at least to my face.). And I'm not even straddling the edge of any rule we have. We're not strict, and this issue is not an HOA problem. I just think that as a representative of the neighborhood (since she came over here under that guise), she needs to check her behavior. If it's official, act official. Don't come over here as an ignorant busybody on a personal vendetta while pretending you're speaking in the interest of peace on the street. Because that's horseshit and it's an inappropriate representation of her position.

Now that I know what I know about some of the other shit she's done, if she shows up here again (or if I see her on the street or whatever) I'm going to confront her and I'm going to ream her until she cries or flees. I'm pissed.

I'm not someone who sits around planning on abusing somebody, but this is so over the top. Plus, she's dragged my friend into it. That's not acceptable and I'm not gonna let it stand. I'm not going to go over to her house, because going over to someone's house just to get in their face is not cool. (after all, that's what she tried to do to me and I reamed her one about that. So I can hardly turn around and do it back.) But if I see her out, and I likely will, the gloves come off.

On a happier note, I went out and picked up a bunch of red and orange gerbera daisys (I guess I spelled that right), white and fuchia pinks, some cherry colored petunias, and some shasta daisies. Once those pink azaleas are done, those colors will look awesome.

I got a hole in one of my beds I need to find something to put in. I don't know what yet. Want it no higher than waist high and has to play nice with some orange daylilies and maximillian sunflowers. I don't know. I gotta think about this some.

Seraph
04-03-2012, 05:01 PM
Some people have too much (to my eye) crap in their yard, but hey, that's their right. To each their own. It's obviously not too much crap to THEIR eye, and their eye is what's important regarding their property. So I guess it's best those folks avoid strict neighborhoods.


Kink, you would've died if you'd seen our yard when we bought the house. They had a miniature rock garden in the front yard, complete with broken sundial, and rotting wood stepstones.

Rose bushes were kinda planted mish mosh everywhere, randomly.

They left a set of six shrubs right at the corner that had grown so high, that people couldn't see past them when turning. That was fun, the town themselves came down on us about it, told us that they'd tried to talk to the old owners, who ignored them. But since we were now there, we had two days to remove them, or face a $600 fine.

Oh, and random shrubs. Seriously. They planted four different types of bushes up against the house, so they all grew differently, and weird looking.

They also buried the wall they knocked down in the middle of the yard, so there was just kind of a huge lump there, that they tried to plant "decorative grass" on to disguise. Of course, didn't work.

Its taken me two years, but I'm about halfway done at taming it. -.-

XCashier
04-03-2012, 05:29 PM
Seraph, with a bit of planning and forethought, the previous owners could've had a nice yard. Nothing wrong with a rock garden, sundial, etc. But it sounds like they didn't plan it right or maintain it properly and it all went to rot. A pity, that.

There's a difference between "art" and "rubbish" and some folks just don't grasp that.

Geek King
04-04-2012, 03:02 PM
Yes, I remember that thread; another reason I never want an HOA. That weirdo was on a total power trip and insisting on forcing someone who wasn't even an HOA member (and was just outside the HOA neighborhood) to comply with her rigid conformist ideals. Ugh!



The thread was removed after it somehow came out that the poster was making the whole thing up. I don't know the whole story behind how the admins figured it out, but there was a short post about it in the archives. Still, it was a fun read. :D

Kanalah
04-04-2012, 07:25 PM
Just cause I want to be cool like RK, here's my attempt at gardening.

http://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.379389892083587.91006.100000377376946&type=1&l=8ea4561700

This is my back patio and my tiny little garden. It's a homeschool project for my kids, but I'm hoping it becomes a regular thing.

RecoveringKinkoid
04-06-2012, 03:41 AM
Strawberries! :) Nothing like home grown ones. Or home grown tomatoes and peppers (looks like?).

Kanalah
04-06-2012, 08:20 PM
Yep. In the back I have rasberries, strawberries, cherry tomatoes and red bell peppers.

On the porch I have parsley and tyme in pots.

My neighbors already think I'm weird.

MoonCat
04-06-2012, 09:48 PM
How did I miss this thread? Kink, your yard is absolutely beautiful! And your HOA busybody sounds like my next-door neighbor...always getting into everybody else's business. A pox on them!

Sapphire Silk
04-07-2012, 02:11 AM
Yep. In the back I have rasberries, strawberries, cherry tomatoes and red bell peppers.

On the porch I have parsley and tyme in pots.

My neighbors already think I'm weird.

Emmmm. Raspberries.

How do you grow raspberries? Do you need shade? Sunlight? What kind of soil? How much work did you have to put into them?

In case you couldn't tell, I love raspberries . . . .

Food Lady
04-07-2012, 04:24 PM
RK, your idea of a beautiful, rambling garden is the same as mine. I'm wondering if I can do that in pots on a balcony in my climate (zone 6 or 7?) I know Oprah helped her neighbors in Chicago do that, and their climate is similar to mine. I get eastern sun. Anyway, as to the dog situation, anyone in their right mind would've called Animal Control!!

Kanalah
04-07-2012, 05:57 PM
How do you grow raspberries? Do you need shade? Sunlight? What kind of soil? How much work did you have to put into them?


The one that I picked up were full sun. I just put one plant in with the strewberries to keep them company. To get the most out of them, you really need to have more then just one plant. They can be planted kinda close together too.

I'm still debating whether or not to pick up another one.

Geek King
04-09-2012, 05:48 PM
The one that I picked up were full sun. I just put one plant in with the strewberries to keep them company. To get the most out of them, you really need to have more then just one plant. They can be planted kinda close together too.


And much like the blackberries that grow wild near my folks, you'll have to watch them as they near ripeness, as birds will nab the ripe berries if they can.

Seraph
04-09-2012, 07:16 PM
Seraph, with a bit of planning and forethought, the previous owners could've had a nice yard. Nothing wrong with a rock garden, sundial, etc. But it sounds like they didn't plan it right or maintain it properly and it all went to rot. A pity, that.

Exactly. It was like they went OOH THATS PRETTY LETS PUT IT THERE. If they'd sketched everything out, it could've been awesome.

Yep. In the back I have rasberries, strawberries, cherry tomatoes and red bell peppers.

On the porch I have parsley and tyme in pots.

My neighbors already think I'm weird.

brb goin to kana's house.

dalesys
04-09-2012, 07:22 PM
brb goin to kana's house.
But. But. But... You'll be berried alive!:eek:


... Please, please don't throw me in that briar patch ...

Seraph
04-09-2012, 07:33 PM
... Please, please don't throw me in that briar patch ...

!!! I know what happens in THIS story! lol

Kanalah
04-09-2012, 09:45 PM
Well we've had one strawberry so far from the garden and Bob (the tomato plant) has 5 green cherry tomatoes on him so far. Derpy the bell pepper is just being derpy.

Yeah Seraph, come on down.

I don't really have a full-on homestead. Not yet. >.>

Edit: Before anyone asks, the 6 strawberry plants are named: Twilight, AJ, Dashie, Rarity, Fluttershy and Pinkie. The raspberry plant is named Celestia. If I grab another plant I'm planning on calling it Luna. (oo maybe blackberries!)

Elspeth
04-09-2012, 10:06 PM
Kanalah, I think I love you.

And RK your garden is amazing. I wish I could have something like that. Problem is I have sun from when it comes up till it goes down. We have no trees. Everything burns here.

ParkingWitch
04-09-2012, 10:25 PM
(oo maybe blackberries!)

And there goes the garden. Seriously every place the vine touches ground it will root and start another one. And they will run under sidewalks, up the walls of the house, and we even have one that forced its way through the basement window and tried to crawl across the ceiling.

Kanalah
04-09-2012, 10:56 PM
Well alright then, maybe another raspberry plant then.

I was looking up blackberry plants and I think I'd need a whole section just for them. Same with the grapes I'd like to grow.

XCashier
04-10-2012, 01:21 AM
Bob (the tomato plant) has 5 green cherry tomatoes on him so far.
Do you have a cucumber plant named Larry? :lol:

Kanalah
04-10-2012, 02:01 AM
No but the kids want one.

No room just yet, but if this takes off we're planning to expand the garden next year. Doing cucumbers, okra, larger tomatoes, pumpkins and watermelon.

Seraph
04-10-2012, 04:42 AM
Do you have a cucumber plant named Larry? :lol:

She also has that one reoccuring leek that never seems to get named, but always is quite dastardly!

Der Cute
04-10-2012, 05:37 AM
Raspberries and blackberries are ebil cousins. The master root of the raspberry is about 6' under the dirt. Blackberries are closer to the top but are sonsabitches to get. They branch out and sprout up wherever they can. They're dandelions of berry family.

You CAN use a chemical (forget name) that goes onto the raw surface area of the root, and it will work back from that to the master plant. Personally I just like cutting the old canes down and letting the yearlings produce. I manually will do the roots- where I'm at isn't really super infested.

Kogarashi
04-14-2012, 04:49 AM
What about black caps? I want some of those, thanks to fond memories of the rampant black cap bushes my parents had at the borders of their property when I was a kid.

XCashier
04-15-2012, 04:42 AM
And there goes the garden. Seriously every place the vine touches ground it will root and start another one. And they will run under sidewalks, up the walls of the house, and we even have one that forced its way through the basement window and tried to crawl across the ceiling.
:eek: Yikes. Who'd think that such delicious fruit comes from such an evil plant?

Is it at all possible to grow a blackberry bush without it taking over the place like Audrey II? In a large pot, perhaps?
What about black caps? I want some of those, thanks to fond memories of the rampant black cap bushes my parents had at the borders of their property when I was a kid.
:confused: Never heard of black cap bushes. I tried to Google it and it gave me the Bush Blackcap (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bush_Blackcap), a cute little bird, but probably not what you had in mind.

Kanalah
04-15-2012, 02:16 PM
Apparently Bob loves us. When I checked on him last night he had 10 tomatoes growing. The largest is about 2.5 to 3 inches across.

I thought he was a cherry tomato!

Kogarashi
04-15-2012, 11:53 PM
:confused: Never heard of black cap bushes. I tried to Google it and it gave me the Bush Blackcap (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bush_Blackcap), a cute little bird, but probably not what you had in mind.

Sorry, looks like that's a local name for them. I hit up Wikipedia and looks like what the people in my hometown called black caps are usually called black raspberries.

ParkingWitch
04-16-2012, 09:51 PM
Is it at all possible to grow a blackberry bush without it taking over the place like Audrey II? In a large pot, perhaps?

Mom says that you can trellis them to keep the runners off the ground to keep them from spreading.

Der Cute
04-17-2012, 03:16 AM
Mom says that you can trellis them to keep the runners off the ground to keep them from spreading.

I disagree on the blackberries. There is a huge ass master root that spreads out and finds little spots to send up canes. In our yard, there is a blackberry patch on top of an old log. That log is a good 60' from the flowers I planted. When I weeded/cleaned out the flower bed, I found a master root the size of a broomstick.
Yeah. That's why there were so many blackberry 'attempts' in that garden.

I think the blackberry roots have GPS for easy to grow spots.

wagegoth
04-18-2012, 11:29 PM
RK, your yard is effing amazing. I am so envious I'm greener than your thumb.:D


Blackberry bushes freak me out a bit. I totaled my mom's car when I was 17 when I blew a tire, went off the road, and ran into a blackberry bush. The car only went into the bush about six inches and stopped dead. The front end was bent under and the suspension went into the engine. Blackberry bushes should be the first line of defense if you're a survivalist.

RecoveringKinkoid
04-19-2012, 12:30 AM
Thanks you!

Yeah, blackberries are more or less Mother Nature's razor wire. And they are a bitch to remove.

Alas, all my azaleas are now bloomed out. It's been so warm here so early, they were actually gone by Easter, which was a shame. I now have primroses and some other stuff.

I should go take a new pic. :)