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COMINATCHA
07-21-2006, 01:41 PM
As most of you know, I work in a nightclub as a dancer. We have to wear tight, kind of skimpy clothing. It's not slutty, but you need a good body to look good in it, cause it shows all your flaws (eek!)

I have been putting on weight recently. Not alot, but enough to notice a difference when I'm wearing my work stuff. My manager has noticed, and he TOLD ME that he's noticed, and that I need to do something about it. He wasn't very subtle about it either, just straight out said
"Those clothes are getting a bit tight on ya aren't they?"
I was embarassed, and then I started feeling really self conscious.

It's not like he's fired me over it, but the fact that he brought it up makes me a bit nervous. I don't like someone scrutinising my body fat. I'm not fat, but i'm up against skinny girls who make me feel inadequete. I will never be really skinny, it's not my natural body shape.

Does anyone else think I should just quit and tell him to shove it?
Or should I go starve myself and stay employed?

blas
07-21-2006, 01:55 PM
Forget that, Comi...

Curves are beautiful and sexy. I doubt you've gained enough weight for it to even show, you are absolutely gorgeous and I'm sure a lot of girls envy YOU because you have curves and they don't. I know I'm damn proud of my hourglass figure, and I'd look ridiculous if I was rail thin.

Don't starve yourself just because some stupid pig of a man basically called you fat.

Be proud of who you are Comi....you are beautiful, inside and out. If your boss makes you feel like you have to starve yourself to look good, you need a new job. No one's self esteem should be brought down by a pig like that.

Barefootgirl
07-21-2006, 02:45 PM
Some guys like curvy girls. Some guys like skinny girls. I am sure that just as many of the club punters ogle you as ogle the skinny girls. Unfortunately the bitter truth is that in a job where you are basically just a decoration, there is tremendous pressure to conform to a set idea of "good-looking", even if you are what everyone else in the universe would consider pretty and slim.

Could you just dance a bit faster and burn off more cals that way? (slightly, but not entirely, tongue-in-cheek!)

TeslaRecoil
07-21-2006, 03:36 PM
Well, unless you've been doing the Super-Size Me diet since the photos you posted in the album, I doubt you have anything to worry about.

Don't let the manager get to ya. If he wants Kate Moss, Nicole Richie, and the Olsen Twins dancing in his club, then so be it. But most guys (at least, I think) would rather have a girl with a real body. Personally, if I can count all of a girls' ribs, it's kinda freaky. It makes me wanna take her out for a steak dinner.

Too bad you're so far away. I'd come watch you dance, as I'm sure every guy on here would. Damn 14 hour flights!

digilight
07-21-2006, 03:42 PM
Comi, first off you are in a position that unfortunatly subjects your physical attributes or what some could percieve as flaws for the whole world to see. Now with that said, I just looked at your photo album pics and I must say that you are a very attractive woman with a very nice figure. What the others above me have said about different men having different taste in women is very true, some like the heroine chic look while others are hot to trot for the bbw look with all other types in between. I think that the most important part is that you be happy with who you are, don't let some jerkoff dictate who you should be. I would judge it on the reactions of the men who are watching you dance if you really care what anyone thinks, after all if they are enjoying watching you then thats the true test.

And for the record I agree with Blas...

Becks
07-21-2006, 03:42 PM
Comi, for the love of...well, whatever...DO NOT EVEN CONSIDER starving yourself!!!!!!!!

Your boss was just being a :censored: jerk!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Personally, I know a lot of guys who DESPISE the living skeleton look (and that's good for me, smooshie girl that I am).

Just be happy with yourself, you're gorgeous!!!!!

Irving Patrick Freleigh
07-21-2006, 04:08 PM
Whatever you do, abso-freakin-lutely DO NOT STARVE YOURSELF!

Tell him to shove it and find another place that will take you for who you are.

Plaidman
07-21-2006, 04:26 PM
Comi, you are one of the most beautiful woman on this board, and far more likely alot more in other places. <-- Understand, I don't I'm crosseeyed XD.

Point is, Don't even Think about starving yourself for a job. Its not right, and it isn't part of your job description. You seem incredibly intelligent from what few I read of your posts, I'm damn sure you can get another job easy, so flip off the boss, do what you do, and if he throws a hissy fit, leave.

protege
07-21-2006, 04:34 PM
Comi, you are one of the most beautiful woman on this board, and far more likely alot more in other places. <-- Understand, I don't I'm crosseeyed XD.

I second (third?) that.


Point is, Don't even Think about starving yourself for a job. Its not right, and it isn't part of your job description. You seem incredibly intelligent from what few I read of your posts, I'm damn sure you can get another job easy, so flip off the boss, do what you do, and if he throws a hissy fit, leave.

Whatever you do, don't starve yourself for the job. It's *NOT* worth it! Tell the boss what he can do with himself (use your imagination here :devil: ) and I'm sure you could find something better.

MystyGlyttyr
07-21-2006, 04:43 PM
There really are men for all types, hon. I'm a big, muscular wrestling girl...5'6", 200 pounds, tossing around 7-footers in the ring, and it's amazing how many guys tell me I'm hot while I'm snarling and kicking the sh*t out of people. If there are guys who like THAT, then there are guys who like a girl with some curves. It's the same reversed...some girls like Tom Cruise and Brad Pitt...I find them revolting and am attracted to shorter, thinner guys like Matt Hyson and Rey Mysterio.

I'm willing to bet your manager has a potbelly and is getting bald...tell him that as soon as he attracts more women than you attract men, then you'll lose the weight. :lol:

NightWolf
07-21-2006, 04:46 PM
Yeah, I have to agree with everyone else on this topic so far. Starving yourself will only do you more harm than good in the long run. Don't do it. You're way to beautiful and the effects of starving yourself will more than likely make your body take a beating and have the opposite effect that you're trying to achieve. Sure you'll be thin, but not a healthy thin. It'll take a toll on you.

I'll give ya an example: Torrie Wilson is a WWE Diva. She was an extremely beautiful blonde that I thought looked perfect when she first entered the business. She took some time off and when she came back you could tell she had lost a lot of weight. I didn't like it at all. Mainly because she looked beat up. Her eyes look rough, dark circles under them, she looks tired all the time, and she just didn't look like she was having fun. I'm assuming she lost the weight in order to keep up with the rest of the Divas on the show, but it sure didn't do her any good.

Tell your boss to take a flying leap. And by the way....isn't this the same asshat that was/is screwing around on his wife?!? I can't think of a good comeback at the moment, but something that hints about that might be a good burn for him. ;)


Oh, and Myst.....I am now scared. All I can picture is Chyna. Please don't hurt me.....lol. But seriously, I think it is EXTREMELY cool that you do that!! I just hope no serious injuries ever happen. <Crosses Fingers>

MystyGlyttyr
07-21-2006, 06:22 PM
Awww, I don't look like Chyna. Think Lita with more muscle and a bigger butt, heh. I'm a semi-mutant in that I have an enormous bone structure. My doctor, in a rare moment of lucidity, compared it to having the skeleton of a six-footer compressed into a 5'6" body. At the lightest I ever have been, I was 140 in high school when I was fitting into a 6. Now I think an eight and 150-160 pounds would be my ideal weight.

I'm never gonna be a skinny little model...and I'd never WANT to be one. I work with one of those size 0 types and I'm always afraid to shake her hand because I feel like I'm going to snap it off at the elbow...

And I already had one "major" injury...did you know you can dislocate your neck? I didn't either. :lol:

NightWolf
07-21-2006, 07:07 PM
YIKES!!! I hear that, and suddenly all I can think about is Owen Hart/Stone Cold.

I've never been one for the skinny little model types. I just don't think it's very attractive when all you can see is ribs. All skin and bones, no thanks. Not for me. I'd be afraid of hurting someone too skinny, much like you've commented on.

Sorry for being somewhat :ot: COMI.

MystyGlyttyr
07-21-2006, 08:18 PM
Sorry for being somewhat :ot: COMI.

Same, but the discussion remains valid...people don't just automatically want skinny little chicks, unless they're going to get sticks and play the xylophone on their ribcage like on Family Guy...

COMINATCHA
07-22-2006, 11:50 AM
Tell your boss to take a flying leap. And by the way....isn't this the same asshat that was/is screwing around on his wife?!? I can't think of a good comeback at the moment, but something that hints about that might be a good burn for him. ;)

Yep, that's the one. The girl he was screwing around with has left, so maybe he's just bored now and is trying to stir up some drama by insulting me.

I'm actually supposed to be getting ready to go to work at this very moment, but I really don't want to. I feel out of place now. The new girls that have been hired are not all that nice, and they are all stunning. I don't think it's healthy to keep comparing myself to other people like this. My self esteem is just low at the moment, and I don't want to be in a job that is based on the way I look.

Ree
07-22-2006, 12:36 PM
I don't want to be in a job that is based on the way I look.Then don't be.

NightAngel
07-22-2006, 05:41 PM
DO NOT STARVE YOURSELF. Period. End of conversation.

Go get another job- one that doesn't put you in this sort of self-depreciating predicament.

We can tell you all day that you're pretty and skinny and whatever but until you decide you are happy with you- none of it will really matter.

JuniorMintz
07-22-2006, 08:42 PM
Then don't be.

Seconded.

Face it Comi, you are a pretty girl who was hired to be a dancing piece of eye candy in a place full of drunken, leacherous losers. I'm not so sure it's a coincidence that you keep finding yourself in the company of total bastards when you're off the clock. Your boss calling you fat should be the least of your worries, at this point. You spend too much of your time in a totally unhealthy enviornment, and you deserve better than that.

Please, for the love of god, do what you have to do to get a different job and get the hell out of the dancing business! (You can always go out dancing when you want to once you're done with your 9-5 for the day. :) )

COMINATCHA
07-23-2006, 01:31 AM
I've already quit!! :respect:

Yes, I am now un-employed. :o

Last night was the last straw, I could not even bring myself to get ready for work, I was just dreading it. So I rang my boss and told him I won't be in again. He didn't have much to say to that, I guess he will have to scrounge up someone else to annoy.
After I made that call, I went to the freezer, and ate some icecream :roll:

My mum is really happy, she never liked me working there. Now she's all keen to help me find a course to study. I'd rather get a better full-time job, but will have to explore my options before I decide. I get my new car next week (i'll post pics when I get it), so I really think I need to be working in order to pay my mum back the money that she loaned me A.S.A.P. I'll see how things go.

*burns stupid skimpy clothing*

Greenday
07-23-2006, 01:52 AM
Good for you Comi! Starving yourself for a job is a horrible idea. Besides, anorexia isn't sexy. You are so beautiful as you are. You don't need to change yourself.

Ryu
07-23-2006, 04:17 AM
i second what greenday said since he said it before me

LostMyMind
07-23-2006, 04:18 AM
Well Cominatcha, good luck in your job search. Hope you find a better place to work at.

P.S. Everyone knows ice-cream is calories and fat free after a stressful day ;)

Becks
07-23-2006, 03:37 PM
Glad you made your escape, Comi!!!!!!!!!! Best of luck!!!!!!!!!!!!

chainedbarista
07-23-2006, 04:41 PM
definitely; don't starve yourself because one idiot makes an inappropriate comment.

a little extra is better than a lot under; i have some extra too, but i don't beat myself up over it. if they like it, fine; if they don't, i'm good with that too!

any guy in his right mind would pick a girl that doesn't starve herself over one that does; we all worry about weight, but when it controls everything you do, then it's a serious problem

your boss can bugger off big time.

SuperDan
07-23-2006, 06:02 PM
Comi,

It seems I'm jumping into this thread a bit late, so here's what I have to say to all of it.

1) You don't even know the meaning of fat. In fact, I have about 150 lbs on my body that I don't particularly need, and you're welcome to take it from me.

2) Your now ex boss is an insensitive prick.

3) Like some others here, I don't particularly find a visible ribcage attractive. From what I can tell from the pics I've seen on your MSN space, you could probably go on the Supersize Me diet for three months and I'd still think you're hot. If you got much skinnier than that, I'd probably pass you up.

4) Starving yourself is never the way to go. If your body notices it isn't getting enough food, your metabolism WILL slow down, resulting in a total loss of energy and quite possibly even more weight GAINED (it doesn't make sense at first glance, but it's true).

5) Ice cream is totally the right way to go for getting over this. Especially peanut butter cup ice cream.

6) If you're still having self-esteem issues, MSN me and we'll talk for a while. If you catch me in a particularly depressed mood, I could probably convince you that you're royalty compared to my pathetic piece of crap life.

7) My personal advice would be to go back to school but keep a part-time job while you're doing that to cover personal expenses and your debt to your mom. You will be able to come up with a much better job with a degree than without one.

8) Before you throw out the skimpy clothes, take a few pictures for the enjoyment of us CS guys:p

COMINATCHA
07-24-2006, 01:25 AM
Comi,

It seems I'm jumping into this thread a bit late, so here's what I have to say to all of it.

1) You don't even know the meaning of fat. In fact, I have about 150 lbs on my body that I don't particularly need, and you're welcome to take it from me.

2) Your now ex boss is an insensitive prick.

3) Like some others here, I don't particularly find a visible ribcage attractive. From what I can tell from the pics I've seen on your MSN space, you could probably go on the Supersize Me diet for three months and I'd still think you're hot. If you got much skinnier than that, I'd probably pass you up.

4) Starving yourself is never the way to go. If your body notices it isn't getting enough food, your metabolism WILL slow down, resulting in a total loss of energy and quite possibly even more weight GAINED (it doesn't make sense at first glance, but it's true).

5) Ice cream is totally the right way to go for getting over this. Especially peanut butter cup ice cream.

6) If you're still having self-esteem issues, MSN me and we'll talk for a while. If you catch me in a particularly depressed mood, I could probably convince you that you're royalty compared to my pathetic piece of crap life.

7) My personal advice would be to go back to school but keep a part-time job while you're doing that to cover personal expenses and your debt to your mom. You will be able to come up with a much better job with a degree than without one.

8) Before you throw out the skimpy clothes, take a few pictures for the enjoyment of us CS guys:p

RE: 1) I think what that should say, is that the boss doesn't know the meaning of the word.

I know I am not fat. Yes I have put on a bit of weight, but it doesn't mean i'm FAT. But when you compared me to all the other girls I was working with, they were so skinny that I probably DID look chubby. That's what I was talking about, which is why I got out of there. Now that i'm back in the real world (lol) I'm not so critical of myself, and I don't get anxious about how I look and whether i'm going to be scrutinised over my body. I'm happier already. If I had stayed there any longer then I think I could have ended up sick.

I actually have a sneaking suspision that it wasn't a coincidence that a bunch of new girls were hired at the same time I was insulted...?

I'm still going to try and lose that little bit of weight though, just for myself :)

RE: 8) :roll:

Ryu
07-24-2006, 02:27 AM
please dont try to lose any weight
being able to see a girls bones is a major turnoff for most if not all guys
i dont think your that skinny but unless you really think you need to lose weight yourself, please dont, you look great the way you are

COMINATCHA
07-24-2006, 02:31 AM
please dont try to lose any weight
being able to see a girls bones is a major turnoff for most if not all guys
i dont think your that skinny but unless you really think you need to lose weight yourself, please dont, you look great the way you are

Thanks for the compliment, but I never said I was going to diet to the extreme of having bones sticking out. When you say 'you look great the way you are' that is based on photos of me BEFORE i put on this bit of weight, so i'm just trying to get back to that. All is good, don't worry. I will never become a stick insect :)

RavenStarr
07-24-2006, 03:23 AM
Comi, quitting that job was best decision. Your ex-boss is nothing but a sleazebag. You are beautiful just the way you are. Don't let nobody tell you otherwise.

One-Fang
07-24-2006, 04:42 AM
You've put on weight because YOU'RE HAPPY!!! You said so yourself. Ain't nuthin' wrong with THAT! :D

If you feel you have to lose a couple of pounds go ahead and start watching the diet. Work out a lot though, aye? Because since you were a dancer, you were doing a lot of exercise at work. Now that you're not, if you don't keep up that level of exercise, you may gain even more weight.

I suspect that you are now that kind of size where there's a bit of flesh, something to grab, but you can still pull off hipsters and crop tops. Wear clothes that flatter your actual figure, not the stupid stick insect skimpy things you had to wear as a dancer, and you might even find that you love it the way you are.

lordlundar
07-24-2006, 02:09 PM
gee, I would have walked in with a 5 foot pole with the clothing tied to it and handed it to the boss. When he asks "what's this?" I would have replied "My replacement.":devil:

If you're happy with your weight, then that's all that counts. Exercise to burn some fat if YOU want to. And put up some recent pics. I doubt you are that heavy that it's a big deal.:angel:

Good luck on that job search. We'll be here for you.:wave:

Cia
07-24-2006, 10:53 PM
gee, I would have walked in with a 5 foot pole with the clothing tied to it and handed it to the boss. When he asks "what's this?" I would have replied "My replacement.":devil:

You forgot the sticker with a :) stuck to the top of the pole. (One must always be able to tell which end is up.)

Silvercat
07-25-2006, 12:13 AM
As one of those sticks, I'll tell you now, it's not that fun to be skinny. Pick a weight you're happy with and work on staying to that.

I assure you, my curvy boobacious sister gets ogled much more than I do... of course that might be because she wears tank tops and I wear hawaiian shirts...

Good luck with the job hunt!