Alright so back in March I was out with some friends at a club and a guy asked me to dance. Later on, I found him again, we chatted a bit, I asked for his number, he put it in my phone. Then he said he would go to the bathroom and be right back, but never returned. Whatever. This was the first time I'd ever asked a guy for his number in my whole adult life, so I was pretty happy. I didn't pester him, just casually asked him for the number, and he gave it to me.
So the next day, I was out with two friends and I told them the story, and how I was super nervous about texting the guy, not sure when I should do so. Then we went to dinner, the first place we went to wouldn't allow minors (one girl was under 19) so I suggested we go to my favorite place. I hadn't been there in forever, as I had only moved back to the city within the year and I just never had the opportunity to go. So we go there, they only card myself and the friend who is drinking, and we meet our waiter. Who I swear looked very similar to Jensen Ackles!
Anyway my friends and I enjoy a lovely meal, though we do end up talking a lot about the cute waiter, and my friends get super insistent I get his number. Feeling a little emboldened from successfully getting a guys number the night before, I decide I should try. It takes me forever to build up the courage. If he says no, it's not big deal, but I really hope he gives me his number. So when he comes with the bill this happens:
Me- Hey can I get your number with that receipt? (OH MY GOD! What am I doing? Abort Abort! Don't hit on wait staff.)
Waiter- Sure. But how do you know I don't have a girlfriend?
Me- If you had a girlfriend, you wouldn't be giving me your number. (wow good job, that was really cool. And you gave him an out, he can say he has a girlfriend and everything is fine. )
Waiter- *writes his name and number on the paper tablecloth* Or maybe I'm just bad.
I swear I almost had a heart attack. My friends were super impressed, and one of them spent the whole next day bugging me to text the guy. I wait a few days, and I text both guys. Neither gets back to me. I'm really disappointed, and kind of pissed. I mean, if they didn't want to give me their number they could have just said no. I only asked them each ONCE. But whatever, I get over it. I'll probably never see them again, and if I do, I can't have made that much of an impression.
Except, that my friend who was under 19 in March, went back to the restaurant alone a few weeks ago. And her server was the waiter from March. And he remembered her, and me. From what she told me, she asked if he texted me, and he just said no. I only know that much. There may be more or less to the story.
But NOW, I can never go back to that place. Because the mere idea of it gives me an anxiety attack. I think going there would give me a full grown panic attack. Even now a thousand horrifying scenarios are running through my head of what might happen if I were to go there for dinner again.
Why couldn't he have just said no?
Anyway, my question was this: When you get someone's number (not that I will ever have the nerve to ask again, but if I do) how long after you get it is a good amount of time to call them or text them? And should you call or should you text? Right after it happened I asked a ton of people I know IRL about it, and they told me to just do what I felt was best. But I have almost zero experience with guys, so I have no idea how to act. So is the next day best, or should you wait longer? Is a week too long? I'm just not sure.
EDIT- Sorry if this is in the wrong thread. I didn't realize i posted it in Off topic until I had posted it.
So the next day, I was out with two friends and I told them the story, and how I was super nervous about texting the guy, not sure when I should do so. Then we went to dinner, the first place we went to wouldn't allow minors (one girl was under 19) so I suggested we go to my favorite place. I hadn't been there in forever, as I had only moved back to the city within the year and I just never had the opportunity to go. So we go there, they only card myself and the friend who is drinking, and we meet our waiter. Who I swear looked very similar to Jensen Ackles!
Anyway my friends and I enjoy a lovely meal, though we do end up talking a lot about the cute waiter, and my friends get super insistent I get his number. Feeling a little emboldened from successfully getting a guys number the night before, I decide I should try. It takes me forever to build up the courage. If he says no, it's not big deal, but I really hope he gives me his number. So when he comes with the bill this happens:
Me- Hey can I get your number with that receipt? (OH MY GOD! What am I doing? Abort Abort! Don't hit on wait staff.)
Waiter- Sure. But how do you know I don't have a girlfriend?
Me- If you had a girlfriend, you wouldn't be giving me your number. (wow good job, that was really cool. And you gave him an out, he can say he has a girlfriend and everything is fine. )
Waiter- *writes his name and number on the paper tablecloth* Or maybe I'm just bad.
I swear I almost had a heart attack. My friends were super impressed, and one of them spent the whole next day bugging me to text the guy. I wait a few days, and I text both guys. Neither gets back to me. I'm really disappointed, and kind of pissed. I mean, if they didn't want to give me their number they could have just said no. I only asked them each ONCE. But whatever, I get over it. I'll probably never see them again, and if I do, I can't have made that much of an impression.
Except, that my friend who was under 19 in March, went back to the restaurant alone a few weeks ago. And her server was the waiter from March. And he remembered her, and me. From what she told me, she asked if he texted me, and he just said no. I only know that much. There may be more or less to the story.
But NOW, I can never go back to that place. Because the mere idea of it gives me an anxiety attack. I think going there would give me a full grown panic attack. Even now a thousand horrifying scenarios are running through my head of what might happen if I were to go there for dinner again.
Why couldn't he have just said no?
Anyway, my question was this: When you get someone's number (not that I will ever have the nerve to ask again, but if I do) how long after you get it is a good amount of time to call them or text them? And should you call or should you text? Right after it happened I asked a ton of people I know IRL about it, and they told me to just do what I felt was best. But I have almost zero experience with guys, so I have no idea how to act. So is the next day best, or should you wait longer? Is a week too long? I'm just not sure.
EDIT- Sorry if this is in the wrong thread. I didn't realize i posted it in Off topic until I had posted it.
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