What exactly gives you the impression I'm open?

[Food Lady]

Is it the darkened light? The phone at my ear? The fact that the 8 people ahead of you in line all the way on the other side of the front lanes from me aren't standing here? And even if I were open, since when does the last person in line go first?

[sms001]

No, it's the shining beacon from the heavens that outlines you in a glittering halo - a checker, a checker just for me and me alone! She even has her phone ready, in case she needs assistance treating me as is my due. O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!

[Food Lady]

LOL I know, it must be exactly what they think! I could see her trying to communicate with me because I made the mistake of facing her direction. Let me say the phone is a bright primary color and I had it to the ear facing her.

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Maybe they want to check out by the sassy lady who looks like Kat Dennings. Have you ever thought of that?

[An Haddock]

One morning I came into our store to open up but I had to take a leak... I left the lights off and the Closed sign up while I hightailed it to the back real quick.

When I came back up front, there was a woman standing in the store with a blank look on her face.

"We're not open yet."
"The door was unlocked."
"The lights are off and the closed sign is up."
"Oh."
"*sighing internally* can I help you?"

Yeah... my fault for not locking the door but I had to piss like a racehorse. The woman had been in a couple of times before and she's a little... off. Pleasant enough, though, and has money to spend. She tremors a bit so I think she has Parkinson's or something similar.

Just annoying that people would ignore clear signs that a business isn't open yet, but what can you do.

[Food Lady]

Maybe they want to check out by the sassy lady who looks like Kat Dennings. Have you ever thought of that?

I looked her up, though I don't know who she is. I don't think I look like her.

[Ironclad Alibi]

Maybe they want to check out by the sassy lady who looks like Kat Dennings. Have you ever thought of that?

I just goggled Kat Dennings. I want her to play the next Morticia Addams.

[Shalom]

she's a little... off. Pleasant enough, though, and has money to spend. She tremors a bit so I think she has Parkinson's or something similar..

or she's taking heavy-duty antipsychotics, of which Parkinsonian tremors are a common side-effect.

[An Haddock]

or she's taking heavy-duty antipsychotics, of which Parkinsonian tremors are a common side-effect.

Well now I don't want to be alone with her in a darkened store.

[Food Lady]

I just goggled Kat Dennings. I want her to play the next Morticia Addams.

You goggled her? LOL I know, it's a typo. Still funny.

[Monterey Jack]

I goggle at Kat Dennings all the time.

[Shalom]

Well now I don't want to be alone with her in a darkened store.

Oh, as long as she continues taking them, she'll be fine.

It's when she stops tremoring that you should watch out...

(OK, I'm exaggerating. There are, and should be, ways to control that side effect; generally they give some Cogentin (benztropine) along with the antipsychotic, to help the dopamine go where it's supposed to. If the tremor goes away, it may just mean that they've got her dosage straightened out, not that she's stopped her meds. Or she may just have Parkinsons and not be taking any psychotropics at all, no way for me or anyone to know.)

In any case she shouldn't be in the store when it's closed, regardless of her mental state at the time.

[GyourselF]

Had a similar thing happen when I used to work for an auto parts store,the manager that was supposed to open didn't show up so I waited for him outside dressed in my uniform along with a couple of customers one of them kept asking me if I was going to open up after I had told him "I DON'T HAVE KEYS" the first time he asked, you can tell the idiot had been drinking he smelled like he had bathed in beer.

[Smapti]

I'm reminded of a few years back when I ran a fast food restaurant, in an older building that had been constructed sometime in the '70s. We were having our ancient grease trap (which was way too small and often filled up between drainings, resulting in all our floor drains overflowing with greasy water every time we ran the dishwasher) replaced with a new 3,000 gallon tank, which necessitated closing the store over a weekend so a giant hole could be gouged into our parking lot, the new tank installed, and then paved back over.

While this was going on, I nonetheless had to swing in for a few hours early in the morning so I could do inventory and close out labor, food cost, etc. for the week. When I arrived, both our driveways were coned off, there were several large construction vehicles sprawled around the lot, everything was covered with a fine sheen of dust and earth, all the lights in the lobby were off, and it was plain to anyone with common sense that this was not a restaurant open for business.

During the three hours or so I was there, I heard the drive-thru intercom turn on about ten times, followed by furtive shouts of "Hello? HELLO?" People had been stopping on the curb, moving the traffic cones, and navigating past the construction equipment to try to get at our drive-thru board. Every single time I had to go grab a headset, assure them that no, the closed signs and traffic cones weren't all part of an elaborate hoax to stop them from getting their breakfast sandwich and large coffee, and that we would be back open tomorrow.

[gerund]

I goggle at Kat Dennings all the time.

There's not many of them to the pound.