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But ... it's on your menu ...

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  • But ... it's on your menu ...

    Customer comes in today and wants a cold brew. We tell him sorry, all we have is iced coffee.

    As I understand it (since I STILL suck at the drink-making part, and in fact have done virtually none in the past month or two), the iced coffee is just a coffee drink with ice tossed into it, while the cold brew is actually ... well, brewed cold. Hot water never touches those beans.

    Mildly Sucky Customer: "But, but ... it's on your menu!"

    Me: "Yes, but we still haven't got any."

    We did a couple of rounds of this and then the manager on duty came over to explain that cold brew takes 20 hours to brew (WTF ... ?!? ) and so once we're out, it takes a while before we've got it again. In fact, we are currently brewing a batch, which will be ready ... tomorrow.

    Apparently the concept of "We've run out" is something this customer has not managed to grasp.

    Good thing he didn't ask for a sandwich or panini; he'd have had to wrap his mind around the concept of "broken oven" as well.
    Customer service: More efficient than a Dementor's kiss
    ~ Mr Hero

  • #2
    I would imagine the call for cold brew is less this time of year, thus your store makes less. Also a concept this customer probably can't wrap their head around.
    Replace anger management with stupidity management.

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    • #3
      Quoth Pixelated View Post
      Apparently the concept of "We've run out" is something this customer has not managed to grasp.
      Come work over in the Warehouse's bakery with me, you'll want to walk out after having to explain the concept of "we're out until further notice" for the millionth time.
      Eh, one day I'll have something useful here. Until then, have a cookie or two.

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      • #4
        Quoth Pixelated View Post
        ... cold brew takes 20 hours to brew (WTF ... ?!? ) ...
        Without the heat, it takes a whole lot longer for the water to extract all of the flavor and caffeine from the beans. It makes a lot of sense that it would take hours; 20 of them does not sound completely outside the realm of possibility.

        You can even experiment with it yourself if you like. Take some fresh grounds, put them in a filter, and put that in a cup that you fill half-full of water. Then stick it in the fridge, and see how long it takes until it looks like coffee.... That's cold-brew!
        “There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old’s life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged.
        One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world.
        The other, of course, involves orcs." -- John Rogers

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        • #5
          Quoth notalwaysright View Post
          I would imagine the call for cold brew is less this time of year, thus your store makes less. Also a concept this customer probably can't wrap their head around.
          You'd think so, wouldn't you? But the number of requests we've gotten over my past few shifts for iced drinks is just unbelievable ... as least, IMO.

          And I seriously wanted to curse out the young girl who showed up with some arcane recipe on her cellphone, on a hellishly busy day, to ask if we could make that. We couldn't. So then she fiddles with her phone and comes up with yet another arcane recipe, dredged from the depths of The Mothership's website, and asks for that instead.

          Seriously, kid, come back next week when nobody's on Christmas vay-cay and ask for your ridiculous liquid diabetes then, okay? We had ONE barista trying to cope, and she had anywhere from 10-15 cups lined up at any given time. She appreciated this even less than I did (there was another person on duty who kept coming up to the bar and doing some relief drinks-making until the pile up cups dwindled.)

          Quoth Android Kaeli View Post
          Come work over in the Warehouse's bakery with me, you'll want to walk out after having to explain the concept of "we're out until further notice" for the millionth time.
          Tell them the House Elves are on strike and your magic wand is back at Ollivander's for repairs ...
          Customer service: More efficient than a Dementor's kiss
          ~ Mr Hero

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          • #6
            If yer out, yer out.

            What puzzles me is when I order something that's on the menu and am told, "We've never had that."
            When you start at zero, everything's progress.

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            • #7
              Quoth Nunavut Pants View Post
              Without the heat, it takes a whole lot longer for the water to extract all of the flavor and caffeine from the beans. It makes a lot of sense that it would take hours; 20 of them does not sound completely outside the realm of possibility.

              You can even experiment with it yourself if you like. Take some fresh grounds, put them in a filter, and put that in a cup that you fill half-full of water. Then stick it in the fridge, and see how long it takes until it looks like coffee.... That's cold-brew!
              I can be slightly more specific: Take a quart jar. Put in a quarter to a third cup of grounds. Fill with water; close and shake to wet the coffee and get the air out; top off with more water. Leave in fridge for 24-36 hours. (20 hours sounds a bit quick to me). Pour result through filter into another jar. You now have cold-brew concentrate. Mix with 3 parts or more water, according to taste.

              Yes, I do that regularly. ;-) This is good for overroasted or lower-quality coffee, as cold-brewing leaves out a lot of the bitterness from such coffees.

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              • #8
                My wife's business completely sold out of Christmas trees on the 23rd. In years past she'd give away trees that were left over after 4:00pm on the 24th. This year there wasn't any. She and my middle daughter were cussed up one side and down the other because there were no free trees. Some actually wanted them to go out and buy some down the street to give to them. She offered them the left over garland but nope she ruined their Christmas. Some of these folks were driving really expensive cars.
                Bow down before me for I am ROOT

                Preserving precious bodily fluids sine 1952

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                • #9
                  No good deed goes unpunished.

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                  • #10
                    I can definitely tell the difference between cold brew and iced coffee but if you were out of one I'd just order the other. I like most any kind of coffee and out of all the battles I could choose, this is just waaaay down on the list. Even when I had the troubles at the coffee shop a couple of months ago (ordered something on the menu they insisted didn't exist) I politely gave up. It wasn't worth the argument and especially not worth getting a manager. It's just a drink.
                    "Is it hot in here to you? It's very warm, isn't it?"--Nero, probably

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                    • #11
                      Quoth MoonCat View Post
                      If yer out, yer out.

                      What puzzles me is when I order something that's on the menu and am told, "We've never had that."
                      I had that happen at Starbucks once - I think it was a "London Fog" that I'd ordered, it was definitely on their menu, but the barista was REALLY confused as to what I was talking about. (she could have been new on the job, though)

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                      • #12
                        Cold brew is about the only kind of coffee I can tolerate - everything else is just unbearably bitter or diabetes-level sweet. But OUT is OUT. (And OUT means "order chai.")

                        (speaking of which, am I the only one who gets irritated when I hear "chai tea?" It's chai. Chai means "spiced tea.")

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                        • #13
                          (How about Personal IdentyNumber Number? Drives me nuts every time I hear it. Internally only, I certainly don't have enough time in my day to correct everyone who uses it incorrectly. Don't even get me started on decimate.)

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                          • #14
                            Quoth Slave to the Phone View Post
                            (How about Personal IdentyNumber Number? Drives me nuts every time I hear it. Internally only, I certainly don't have enough time in my day to correct everyone who uses it incorrectly. Don't even get me started on decimate.)
                            You mean like when people say they put their PIN number into the ATM machine?
                            "I don't have to be petty. The Universe does that for me."

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                            • #15
                              Quoth Mental_Mouse View Post
                              I can be slightly more specific: Take a quart jar. Put in a quarter to a third cup of grounds. Fill with water; close and shake to wet the coffee and get the air out; top off with more water. Leave in fridge for 24-36 hours. (20 hours sounds a bit quick to me). Pour result through filter into another jar. You now have cold-brew concentrate. Mix with 3 parts or more water, according to taste.

                              Yes, I do that regularly. ;-) This is good for overroasted or lower-quality coffee, as cold-brewing leaves out a lot of the bitterness from such coffees.
                              i guess i skipped a step there. i made that once, and didn't realize you needed to dilute it, granted i like strong coffee. THAT will wake you up quick.
                              This is a drama-free zone; violators will be slapped. -Irving Patrick Freleigh
                              my blog:http://steeledragon.wordpress.com/

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