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  • Excessive Religion + Consumer Society = Fail

    I think it must be something in the water because my store gets at least one religous nutcase a week, but this guy takes the cake.

    On Tuesday he spent at least 4 and a half hours wandering around our store with a pen a nd notebook writing things down and muttering to himself.

    Dosent seem that wierd right.......

    The next day he comes into the store walks up to the service desk and starts lecturing the checkout superviser on, get this, "Changes that need to be made to this store to prevent your staff from burning in hell". He spent the next 20 minutes lecturing her on blasphemy, god and hell.

    And here comes the big one....

    He gives us a 55 page report detailing all of the blasphemous and un-christian things that he has found in our store. Just to give you and idea of the content, here is one of his faults with our store.


    The product line *Generic Cleaning Company* Antibacterial wipes. The packaging claims that there is nothing better, this is blasphemy as it implies that the product is better than God himself.

    WTF!!!!!1

    PS: for all of you wondering I would post a copy of the report but during its time in the lunch room a certain member of the nightfill staff *cough Stuart, spilt 2 litres of coke onto it, on the plus side most of the store had a good laugh at it before its untimley demise.
    Last edited by Eggmont; 09-08-2007, 05:28 AM. Reason: adding somthing
    Oh yeah? well you have a gambling problem! - Homer Simpson

    Protect the beef - Various <prestige> warlocks

  • #2
    Render unto god that which is god's, render unto customer that which will not satisfy no matter how far backwards you bend for them...

    Is that a 55 page report or a 55 point report?

    Rapscallion

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    • #3


      It's people like him that give religious people a bad reputation among many.
      Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

      "I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily

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      • #4
        Quoth Irving Patrick Freleigh View Post


        It's people like him that give religious people a bad reputation among many.
        Real nice, IPF. That poor man is doing the Lord's work and you're persecuting him for it.
        I know nothing and I can prove it!

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        • #5
          Quoth Eggmont View Post
          The product line *Generic Cleaning Company* Antibacterial wipes. The packaging claims that there is nothing better, this is blasphemy as it implies that the product is better than God himself.
          HAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

          ...oh wait, you're serious. Let me laugh even harder.

          BWAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! /Bender
          "Maybe the problem just went away...maybe it was the magical sniper fairy that comes and gives silenced hollow point rounds to people who don't eat their vegetables."

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          • #6
            Wow! You must give us more examples! I love stuff like this......how much for you to mail me a copy of the report? I'll pay shipping! Haha...great lunch-time reading!

            j/k
            "If it offends one person, it effects everyone".....me, on the PC world in which we dwell.

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            • #7
              Quoth Eggmont View Post

              The product line *Generic Cleaning Company* Antibacterial wipes. The packaging claims that there is nothing better, this is blasphemy as it implies that the product is better than God himself.

              WTF!!!!!1
              Hey.. I have a buddy in advertising.. that's pretty good!

              "Buy Acme anitbacterial wipes. They are better than God himslef."

              Wow.. how do you argue with that??
              I will never go to school!

              Comment


              • #8
                wow

                How do you even respond to something like that? Like, I seriously spent the last couple of minutes trying to come up with a snarky, witty response, were I in your situation, and all I get is drool. From my mouth hanging open in astonishment/horror.

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                • #9
                  When I threaten to give my big guy a butt kicking the likes of which God Himself has never seen, is that blasphemy?

                  And, NO I wouldn't really give my son a butt kicking.
                  Do not annoy the woman with the flamethrower!

                  If you don't like it, I believe you can go to hell! ~Trinity from The Matrix

                  Yes, MadMike does live under my couch.

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                  • #10
                    Sometimes, there are just some situations where a reply is best unspoken.

                    I suspect this would have been one of those situations - religion or not.

                    Speaking of religion, let's keep this civil and leave the bashing out - I've seen too many threads shut down because they would deteriorate to which religion is better/why/et al.

                    So this is an official reminder to keep it nice - SC's are nondiscriminatory.
                    Human Resources - the adult version of "I'm telling Mom." - Agent Anthony "Tony" DiNozzo (NCIS)

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                    • #11
                      How about posting a pdf of that report there?
                      The only words you said that I understood were "His", "Phone" and "Ya'll". The other 2 paragraphs worth was about as intelligible as a drunken Teletubby barkin' come on's at a Hooter's waitress.

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                      • #12
                        I consider insanity in any form to be highly entertaining on many levels, about 95% of the time, so I too vote for a more indepth report on the report.
                        Ba'al: I'm a god. Gods are all-knowing.

                        http://unrelatedcaptions.com/45147

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                        • #13
                          How dare he use my name in vein without my permission.

                          I am blasphemy and I shall decree what is and what isn't truly blasphemy.

                          SO THERE!
                          You really need to see a neurologist. - Wagegoth

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                          • #14
                            Do you have a copy of the report? Any chance you could possibly put it up for us (obviously doctored a bit to remove all identifying comments)? That sounds like a scream.

                            I know its not kind to laugh at the obviously mentally ill, but some people are just so off-the-wall there isn't much else you can do. Apparently my grandfather's nanny suffered from religious mania and died in an asylum before the first world war. A hundred years later, i don't know if its better or worse that now we don't lock people up for suffering from the same condition, but let them wander the streets becoming distressed at what they see around them.
                            A person who is nice to you, but not nice to the waiter is not a nice person
                            - Dave Barry

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                            • #15
                              Call me crazy, but I'd have been tempted to lean in real close to that guy, and, speaking in a low, conspirational
                              whisper, say, "Hi....My name is Satan. And I'm going to barbecue you when you die."
                              Herewith, a nugget of wisdom from the very wise Mike Brady: "Alone, we can only move buckets. But if we work together, we can drain rivers."

                              --
                              mannabozo.wordpress.com

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