Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Out of the Frying Pan...

Collapse
This topic is closed.
X
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Out of the Frying Pan...

    Hi, I'm fairly new here and have one or two tales about some of the places I've worked.

    First a bit about my former Jobs

    1. Restaurant - I used to work a variety of roles in a Restaurant which had (much to the joy of the people working there) a small staff and lots of customers.

    I regularly ended up working 16-18 hours a day and more often ending up rotating between all of the jobs I had there in any one day, which were;

    Chef - I was a Chef de Partie and thanks to the low staff often ended up having to manage several stations (not that I minded) Given the fact that we could be serving up to 90 people at any one time, it could end up confusing (though thankfully I managed to never screw anything up, well except for the mercifully small amount of complaints of customers who in most instances, didn't have a clue)

    Kitchen Porter - Your basic pot washer and gopher guy, Though I always used to give a hand to the rest of the kitchen staff if they needed it (Which they invariably did, many a time I sacrificed well earned breaks to help the rest of the guys)

    Waiter - Nothing too special just a regular waiter who also sometimes got punted to the Bar if need be. And also thanks to this job, I'm often sent out

    Tale #1 - Oh God.

    It was a busy night for me, not only was it busy, it was also a themed night, this one being a 70's theme, so of course, I was wearing an Afro wig. I go to serve one table, which happens to have on it, the Priest of the Church where my grandmother goes to. As I'm bringing the starters (in the Priests case, soup) my afro must have gotten loosened (thanks to me being somewhat tall and a door frame) as I was serving the Priest his soup, disaster! My wig fell off and landed right in his soup. In his most stern tone, he said to me "I think you'd better take that away" and after pausing for a few seconds he then said, much more jovially "Otherwise everyone else might want one with theirs" (He'd obviously heard the "Waiter there's a fly in my soup" gag.

    Now before I continue, I should let you know about Amber. Amber is a waitress in the same restraunt as I was working at and Amber and I are very close, not dating close but close nonetheless, I view her, treat her and consider her (and for all intents and purposes she is) my little sister, much to her annoyance since she's a few days older than me. We also have a trump card, if she's ever having trouble with a customer and I'm sent out to sort it (which happened rather a lot) I generally inform the troublesome customer that she's my sister (which she isn't but playing that card can be helpful in some situations) She's also very insecure and doesn't react well to obvious, horrible and persistant flirting. Having a friendly chat with her? That's fine, but being flirted with really upsets her, thanks in no small way due to the numerous bad relationships she's ended up in.

    Tale #2 - Barking Mad (I'd like to point out that I love animals of ALL kinds, well, except spiders)

    So it was a normal, busy day for me, all went well until the evening. I saw Amber and the Manager walk into the kitchen, Amber had the expression of a deer caught in the headlights of a car mixed with one that seemed like someone just killed her favourite pet(The reason for this look will be explained later). She mouths one word to me "Dog" I glance at the Manager and she nods to me, obviously a cusotmer has brought a dog in and guess who gets to deal with it? That's right.

    Me = The Talented, overworked marvel that is, well, me.
    GWD = Guy with Dog

    So I head over to the customer, who seems to be in his late 40's, after observing him so that I can be sure it isn't either a seeing eye dog or a disability helper dog.

    Me: "Sir, I'm afraid I'll have to ask you to either tie your dog up outside"
    GWD: "Why?"

    Me: "For one, it's against the rules for animals to be allowed in here unless they are for the disabled or blind" (I didn't check but logic dictates said rule, If it was a seeing eye dog or disability helper dog that's fair enough but it just seemed like it was just the guys pet, yes, it was a Lab but there was no indication of it being used for either of the two previous tasks) "And two, your dog is terrifying one of the staff"

    GWD: "That's her problem, not mine" (this really annoyed me and you'll see why)

    Me: "The member of staff in question, who just happens to be my sister, was mauled by a dog as a small child and it nearly killed her, she's been scared of them ever since" (Which I did play the "She's my sister" card, her being mauled was completely true

    GWD: "Oh..."

    Me: "So I'm afraid I'll have to ask you to either leave or tie the dog up outside, but if you're worried about the welfare of your dog while he's outside, I'll speak with one of the managers and see if I can stay outside with him and look after him"

    The guy nodded, so I went over to the manager and asked her, though she'd been listening to what I was saying and agreed, after asking the kitchen staff if they could manage without me for a while. So I spent Two hours outside with the dog, making sure it was fed and watered and excersized, which was important for both of us because it was in the middle of December and Absoloutely Freezing.

    Tale #3 Bring in Bessie.

    So it was a normal day (Yet again not to be so for long) and one particular customer was often sending his steak back saying that it wasn't rare enough, by the time I got sent out to deal with it, it was as rare as I could safely, legally and morally make it. Amber also happened to be serving this guy. I quickly hatched a devilish scheme.

    Me = Me
    Amber = Amber
    FMG = Fresh Meat Guy

    Me: "Is there a problem Sir?"
    FMG: "Yes, this steak isn't rare enough" (Practically dripping)
    Me "Well I'm sorry sir, it's as rare as I can legally, morally and safely make it" I take great pride in my work.
    FMG: "I want it rarer"
    Me: *Great big sigh and then looked sideways at amber* "Alright, Amber, could you please bring in Bessie"
    Amber: (Not really sure of what was going on but managed to go along with it "Alright"
    FMG: "Who's Bessie?"
    Me: "Well sir, Bessie is our resident Cow, for when people like yourself who find the food that we cook them not rare enough"
    FMG: "Oh, You know what, I'll think I'll have my steak just the way it is thanks"

    I head back into the Kitchen, after watching Amber rush in the direction of the bathroom, presumably to laugh till her sides hurt.

    Yes, I tended to get odd customers when I worked there. There was once a guy who sent his gammon steak back because it was salty. We tried to explain how pork produce always has something of a salty taste, but he was having none of it, so we finally gave up and scoffed it ourselfs.

    Final Tale - The Idiot. (Not a customer but still a sucky guy)

    Another job that I had was as a receptionist (decievingly simple title for what I did) at a mobility centre, that hired out (for free, after a joining fee) electric powered mobility scooters to people that need them. One of our regular customers has a grand daughter who is a similar age to me and who also happens to be completely blind (Not hard to tell that with the White Cane and sunglasses that she has), She'll often come with her grandmother and either wait for her at the centre, conversing with the staff or if it's my lunch hour, I'll often take her round the town, spend time with her and have a chat, generally making sure she has a good time. So one day we were walking through a shopping centre when a guy cuts across intous, nearly knocking us both over. The guy gave us her a glare and said "Watch where you're going!" That stung her and annoyed me but he was soon walking off before we could react. I was thinking in my head "Yeah mate, I'd have watched were we were going if I saw you coming, but you cutting across gave me no reaction time and she can't because she is blind. "

    I'll bring you more tales just as soon as I get around to remembering them
    I am the nocturnal echo-locating flying mammal man.

  • #2
    My girlfriend was telling me about some sports jock she knew. I don't remember which sport it was, but it's the kind where the guys are all bulky and 'tough'. Whatever. So.
    They went to a Japanese hibachi, the place where the food is cooked and served right in front of you. The team goes in, and one of the guys orders a raw steak. Completely raw. Chef informs him that isn't possible and says it has to touch the pan. Guy nods, chef puts the steak onto the grill and immediately the guy says 'Flip it'. Well, he got his way. Ate it, too. 3 of 'em.
    At Outback, the waitress was so funny and nice to us. I ordered a rare steak and she explained how rare it would be (and it was. yum.) and when I agreed, she jokingly called me a carnivorous sheila. It made me laugh, especially when my girlfriend ordered the same.

    Comment


    • #3
      One thing that utterly dumbfounds me is when customers can't comprehend the fact that I have to (Here comes a shockers) COOK the food that they want to eat, they can't seem to figure out that they can A. Wait and have their food hot, cooked and safe to eat or B. Spend the weekend in the bathroom, no matter how I'm tempted to teach them that lesson, I'm afraid my morals won't allow me to do so.
      I am the nocturnal echo-locating flying mammal man.

      Comment


      • #4
        Wow. I love dogs, but that was just over and above! (And I don't know where you're located, but I'd say it's a pretty safe bet that the health department wouldn't take too kindly to a non-working dog in a restaurant.) If it was up to me I'd have told him he needed to leave, and maybe offer to wrap up his food to go.

        Question: Is there a reason the manager didn't deal with him? Really, it seems that would be the manager's job, not the chef/waiter/whatever's.
        I don't go in for ancient wisdom
        I don't believe just 'cause ideas are tenacious
        It means that they're worthy - Tim Minchin, "White Wine in the Sun"

        Comment


        • #5
          Yep, I'm in the UK, where we have the Wonderful (Not really) Health and Safety guys, which can make normal tasks a living nightmare.

          What got me was why the guy thought bringing his dog out to a restaurant of all places was a good idea at all.

          Even if it was a working dog, I'd have politely asked the person if it was all possible for a member of staff to take the dog outside and take care of it, explaining Ambers problem with it, considering that having a dog in the Restaurant would have ensured that Amber wouldn't have been able to step foot in there.

          And the reason I got sent out instead of the manager dealing with it was that I somehow gained a reputation of being able to deal with problematic customers so I often got sent out and got the responsibility of dealing with any problems. Could be a pain sometimes, but I didn't mind doing it, especially if it involved Amber being caught up in/affected by it.

          Plus I have a long fuse and can, if need be, give a stare that pretty much says "I'm going to hunt you down, kill you, your family and your family pet if you keep on being such a pain." Which will make most people think twice about being arses with me.
          Last edited by RayvenQ; 02-10-2008, 10:29 PM.
          I am the nocturnal echo-locating flying mammal man.

          Comment


          • #6
            Nothing much to say, really, except that anyone cutting across me is going to be stopped the moment they strike me unless they outmass me by better than 150 lbs. (I know, I've stopped people cold who massed less than that.) Since I'm currently up around 300, that's going to take some doing.

            Also, I love gammon steak!
            The Case of the Missing Mandrake; A Jude Derry, Sorceress Sleuth Mystery Available on Amazon.

            Comment


            • #7
              Oh, I was also reminded of a story my dad likes to tell. Apprently some guy he used to know liked his steak "blue"...basically, like you described above, lay it on the pan, flip it over, and done. Or, in the guy's words, "Just run the cow by the table and I'll take a bite."



              Except for hamburgers, I used to like my beef fairly rare (not that rare, though) until one day I got a really thick hamburger that looked practically raw in the middle. It turned my stomach and ever since, I order any kind of beef medium or medium well, and hamburgers (if given a choice) well done. Too much red just kills my appetite.
              I don't go in for ancient wisdom
              I don't believe just 'cause ideas are tenacious
              It means that they're worthy - Tim Minchin, "White Wine in the Sun"

              Comment


              • #8
                Quoth BookstoreEscapee View Post
                Oh, I was also reminded of a story my dad likes to tell. Apprently some guy he used to know liked his steak "blue"...basically, like you described above, lay it on the pan, flip it over, and done. Or, in the guy's words, "Just run the cow by the table and I'll take a bite."


                Sounds like your dad used to know my ex-husband. He once told a waitress, "Knock its horns off, wipe its ass, and get it out here."

                Also ate his hamburgers almost raw. As in, couldn't tell the meat from the ketchup.

                euuwwgh.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Quoth BookstoreEscapee View Post
                  Except for hamburgers, I used to like my beef fairly rare (not that rare, though) until one day I got a really thick hamburger that looked practically raw in the middle. It turned my stomach and ever since, I order any kind of beef medium or medium well, and hamburgers (if given a choice) well done. Too much red just kills my appetite.
                  If you're not going to eat that burger....

                  I tell my waitstaff to give me my steak/burgers/BEEFDAMMIT to me as rare as they are allowed to go. The bloodier the better. Mum's the same way, so I probably got it from her. Whenever we barbeque burgers (as we tend to do in the summer), Dad leaves ours on the grill for about 12 nanoseconds. Just enough to melt the cheese, plates 'em, and hollers for us.

                  We have fun grossing out our vegan cousin.

                  The rest of my meat I'll take cooked, thanks.
                  Now a member of that alien race called Management.

                  Yeah, you see that right. Pink. Harness.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    The discussion of how rare the meat should be reminds me of a story my dad told me about my grandfather. The family was eating at a rather well known Milwaukee restaurant. My grandfather knew the owner quite well. That night, my grandpa ordered a steak "medium rare." When the steak arrived, it was absolutely blood rare.

                    After a moment, my grandpa called to owner of the restaurant over to the table and said, "Gus, I ordered my steak medium rare, but, just look at this. I've seen cows hurt worse than this and live."

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      lol @ the priest... good to see he had a sense of humor

                      and bessie... can i have some of that please?
                      yes, i've often asked for meat "as rare as legally possible"

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Quoth RayvenQ View Post
                        So it was a normal day (Yet again not to be so for long) and one particular customer was often sending his steak back saying that it wasn't rare enough, by the time I got sent out to deal with it, it was as rare as I could safely, legally and morally make it.

                        We had a guy like that at the resturant I worked at. Though he wasn't sucky, just confused the waitress and grill cook for a second.

                        He came in, and ordered a steak: (direct quote) "...as rare as you can legally make it."

                        The waitress gave the order to cook, he asked "what the hell does that mean!?". She didn't know, so they asked the manager. The manager thought about it a second, picked up a menu and read the standard disclaimer at the bottom.

                        "Eating undercooked meat or eggs could result in potential health problems." (or whatever it says, I'm sure you know it lol)

                        Then he looked at company policy, all it REQUIRES, outside of the basic health codes, is that everything cooked on the grill MUST have the criss-cross grill marks.

                        So...

                        (again, direct quote)
                        Manager: "Okay! Put grill marks on it and send it out!"

                        That steak spent less than 3 minutes on the grill. As a reference, our "VERY RARE" steak took ~6 minutes, depending on how hot the grill was at the time.

                        As a side note (I don't want to make this long, but this should give a frame of reference), the manager that authorized this was an awesome manager, his sole job was to run the kitchen, and he was VERY good at it. He was able to please the customers, but at the same time, do it in a way that didn't piss off the kitchen staff

                        We had one guy order a "Philadelphia Style steak" which is basically a flat-iron steak, cooked with butter. It's essentially what you would make in your own kitchen if you were just making a pan-cooked steak. (It allows the meat to be very seared on the outside, and still have the center remain tender and juicy... it''s actually a very nice contrast). It's not THAT big of a request, really, but we just weren't equipped for it... plus a steak cooked in this way requires a LOT of attention.

                        So the manager went so far as to cook it himself. He got two of our flat fajita pans (which are heated in a 400 degree [Fahrenheit] oven), laid one on the grill, put the steak on top of it, and then put the other pan on top. He spent the next 15 minutes pouring melted butter over this steak and using the two flat pans to cook it. That's just how awesome he was. Giving the customer what they wanted, but not pissing off the staff in order to do it.
                        Last edited by Lingering Grin; 02-11-2008, 07:54 AM.
                        <Insert clever signature here>

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Quoth PepperElf View Post
                          lol @ the priest... good to see he had a sense of humor

                          and bessie... can i have some of that please?
                          yes, i've often asked for meat "as rare as legally possible"
                          It was as rare as I could legally make it without 1. Getting arrested and imprisoned 2. Getting fired and prevented from working in kitchens again and 3. Losing my food Hygiene certifications (all 3 of them Basic, Intermediate and Advanced, I had all three while for a normal kitchen post I would have needed up to intermediate at most).

                          And yet the guy still wasn't happy with it being that rare.

                          Anytime a customer wanted their food done and done now, without it being cooked properly, would get a subtle hint from me at the horrible symptoms of several different kinds of food poisoning.

                          Speaking of Grills, we had one that could quite literally turn bread into carbon within 30 seconds, so of course, when I was doing my Porter duties, people would leave metal dishes under there and then put them on the area where I work for me to clean them...without telling me that they'd been on the grill, It's an annoyance at best having to try and pull off plates that are stuck to your skin, I soon learned to assume that anything metal = white hot.
                          Last edited by RayvenQ; 02-11-2008, 10:31 AM.
                          I am the nocturnal echo-locating flying mammal man.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Quoth RayvenQ View Post
                            One thing that utterly dumbfounds me is when customers can't comprehend the fact that I have to (Here comes a shockers) COOK the food that they want to eat, they can't seem to figure out that they can A. Wait and have their food hot, cooked and safe to eat or B. Spend the weekend in the bathroom, no matter how I'm tempted to teach them that lesson, I'm afraid my morals won't allow me to do so.
                            I always order "blue" steak when I go to Jack Astor's. And they bring it to me exactly how I ordered it. The thing is, with steak, the dangerous bacterias are all surface only. If the cooking surface is hot enough, there's really VERY little risk. Personally, if I can't get my steak cooked the way I want it, I'll just order something else. I hate overcooked (in other words, cooked) meat LOL
                            GK/Kara/Jester fangirl.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Wow. Um, shoot. Granted, bacterial issues in the stomach aren't pleasant, but some people have better tolerance/ability to handle than others. What keeps me from ever having truly rare meat is tapeworm.

                              I'd go into detail, but...

                              Although the philly style one sounds yum.
                              There is no .sig that still seems clever 50 posts later.

                              Comment

                              Working...
                              X