Phone lessons for the SC...

[Pinkie]

A few Do's and Don'ts for SC's when they call in to a call center for billing help/information....

Feel free to add your own!
(Can you tell it's been a bad week?)



1. When I say "I'll be asking you some questions", that means it's time for you to shut up, listen and answer just the questions I'm asking!!

2. If your call comes through on my line, and you've put us on hold, I'm releasing the call. My time is just as important as yours!

3. Stop talking to whom ever is there with you. This will benefit you as well as me because sometimes we discover you're a scammer when you think we can't hear you! It will save us both time as well because I won't have to repeat myself!

4. Don't use your "pity me" voice, cry, swear at me or use local slang. It wins you no points in my book.

5. Do not use the toilet/flush! I can hear you!!

6. Do not eat or smoke while on the phone. The last thing I want to hear is some lip smackin' or you inhaling or exhaling when you take a drag. We can hear most everything!!

7. Let me finish giving you answers before you butt in!! You called me for answers so dambit, let me give them to you!!

8. Do not sneeze and/or cough in my ear. It's LOUD and it HURTS my ears!!

9. Please do not call if you are off your meds!

10. If you are angry, think twice before calling, because if you go off on me, you're not going to get me on your side. Treat me with respect and I'll bend over backwards to help you, but treat me like garbage, and garbage is what you'll get!

[Falconess]

(for ording office products)

11. It helps greatly, if you have at least some idea of what you're looking for. "Inky Pen" doesn't help, as there are litterally thousands. Best if you just get SKU before you call in, with your order.

12. It says, on our web site, in our catalog, and on the card you're looking at, that we close at 5pm PST, please don't call in at 4:59pm, with an order you MUST have by tomorrow.

(that's all I got for now, but more may come to me later...I is very tired right now)

[calulu]

11. Don't yell at me. I'm not yelling at you so I expect you to treat me with the same courtesy.

[Evil Queen]

12. Please have your credit card ready when you make the call, and don't leave it out in "Mah Buddy's truck, mm-hm."

[calulu]

15. Don't stop and keep consulting someone else for every damn question. If you don't know the answers put the other person on.

[Rattslinger]

I found this article a while ago, it's pretty much what we're talking about here.

Maximize Your Customer Service Call

[smileyeagle1021]

13. if you are calling in for reservations for the love of all things holy know when you are travelling

14. the correct answer to "may I ask with whom I'm speaking" is not, "yes, I'll be staying there this weekend"

15. this applies doubly for travel agents... know what hotel you are calling, you lose the right to complain about how expensive a room is the second you punch in the number for a 5 star resort.

16. similar to 15, know where the hotel you are calling... when you are calling a hotel in manhatten don't tell me about the rate you got in cleveland... cleveland is a lot cheaper than manhatten for pretty much everything, real estate, gasoline, retail prices... and yes hotels.

17. your inability to have a cell phone with good signal is not our personal failing, if you want us to udnerstand you either call back on a landline or when you have found a spot with better service.

[South Texan]

If you are ordering food, figure out what you and your buddies want BEFORE YOU CALL. Nothing is more irritating that someone who says"I wanna get a pizza" but then has to yell around the room as to what size, crust, toppings, etc. the group wants.

[Bradester]

When I ask you for a description of your neighbor's dog, please give me more details than "it's a hunting dog." How about, you know, color and size?

[tropicsgoddess]

18. Do not hit on me or get fresh with me. You called a 1-800 customer service line. If you want to be "serviced", please (for the love of all things holy) call the 1-900 line!!!

[Gothicsmurf]

- Do not call me with half the information I need then place me on hold while you call another person. This isn't the first time either of us have done this and we both know that other person isn't going to be there.

- TURN THE TV/RADIO DOWN. It's hard to hear what you're asking me for when all I can hear is "You ARE the father."

- We have two phone lines. One for this and one for that. Do not call this line asking for that. You can't pretend you didn't know either. I sent you an email an hour ago with the number for that.

[Pinkie]

Here's one I forgot yesterday....


When I ask for your name, don't say "the account is listed under Joe Blow". I asked for YOUR name, not the name the account is listed under! I have to document who I spoke with. Duh!

[zigcat]

Don't ask "How big is your 16" (or other size) pizza.
About THIS big (holds arms apart) can you see it?

When I ask if you'd like anything else, don't tell me no and then change your mind once I've run your credit card.

Also if you're going to use a coupon, tell me up front, again not after I've processed your cc information.

If I ask you to hold and you say no I will hang up on you.

You wanna call up and order pizza? Great! Love to have you! But don't have your buddy call and then have to relay information.
"Hey Josh, what's your address?"
"Hey Josh what's your phone number?"
"Hey Josh, what's your apartment number" etc.

[Naaman]

2. If your call comes through on my line, and you've put us on hold, I'm releasing the call. My time is just as important as yours!

2a. Whilst we understand you're calling at the busiest time of year and the queue times are long, if you've put the phone to speaker and are wandering around the house we will start the 'hang-up'* game if we don't receive an adequate response after the 3rd "Hello! Is anyone there?"


*Hang up game is when they come running to the phone and you try judge it so that you hit the call release button just as they've got their fingers on the handset..

[rerant]

I'm just going to quote something I wrote a few days ago on another site, since it relates directly to this thread.

When calling me do not hack, wheeze, spit, cough, choke, drink, chew food, make any sort of gurgling sound, hold a screaming child, stand near a TV, put me on hold, yell, curse, scream, whine, or otherwise act unpleasant.
I will hang up on you.
When calling me please do know where you live. That's all I ask.
I just want you people to fucking know where you live. Learn your directions, because I will be asking you very difficult questions such as, "Are you East or West of this street?" and while I can't see you I can only imagine that you're staring blankly at a wall, slack-jawed and drooling while the rusty cogs in your head try to comprehend the information I require from you.

I hate people.