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Psuedo Luxury Cars, Baldness, and Six Year Olds

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  • Psuedo Luxury Cars, Baldness, and Six Year Olds

    I've been kinda busy for while what with work and school and all but here's a few stories I've collected.

    A Saturn does not equal a Lexus

    Especially not a used Saturn. It will not perfrom like a Lexus. It will not drive like a Lexus. Most importantly your 2001 L300 psuedo-luxury car will, I repeat with added emphasis, WILL rattle. SURPRISE, plastic shrinks and expands with the temperature. We have extremes of hot and cold here. This means the plastic will not fit the same way it did from the factory after 7 years of this. It WILL make NOISE!!!

    What you should be more concerned about is the front end suspension noise your car has. But hey, whatever, its your crappy car.

    Bald tires are bad

    Car comes in for an oil change, and while I'm doing that I see that the front two tires are so worn that there's no tread left at all on them and the rear tires are pretty close to that too.

    I write up an estimate with several tire choices on it ranging in price from $130 to $400 for all four tires. When I try and sell the tires this conversation ensues.

    Me = Superman
    WM = Weird Man

    Me: Sir, I noticed that your tires are gettin kinda thin, I brought you an estimate with several different choices. These tires right here I highly recomend as you'll be getting the most bang for your buck and at $233 dollars for all four including labor these are really a good deal.

    WM: No thanks, I just had my tires replaced a little while back, they're still fine.

    Me: Well sir, the tread on your front tires is completly gone and the tread on your rear tires is at 1/32ds and 2/32ds right and left respectively. I highly recomend you replace them as soon as possible.

    WM: Hmm... Okay then. Thanks for letting me know. But I think I'll pass on the tires for now.

    Me: .... Alright sir, your car will be ready in a few minutes...

    I don't really know what to say about this one but I guess it's his blowout at 70 miles an hour.

    Nothing else I feel like typing up right now except a list of reasons why you shouldn't let your six year old run around in a shop.

    Cars raised 6+ feet in the air.
    Expensive tools
    Large tools.
    Sharp tools.
    Falling heavy objects.
    200+ degree farenheit engines and exsuast parts.
    Used motor oil.
    Used coolant.
    Brake dust.
    Ornery mechanics.
    Foul language.
    Second hand ciggarette smoke.
    and last but not least
    WE'RE NOT A DAYCARE FACILITY!

  • #2
    A kid... running around... WHY?!
    Ridiculous 2009 Predictions: Evil Queen will beat Martha Stewart to death with a muffin pan. All hail Evil Queen! (Some things don't need elaboration.....) -- Jester

    Ridiculous 2010 Predictions: Evil Queen, after escaping prison for last years prediction, goes out and waffle irons Rachel Ray to death. -- SG15Z

    Ridiculous 2011 Prediction: Evil Queen will beat Gordon Ramsay over the head with a cast-iron skillet. -- FireHeart

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    • #3
      Quoth Evil Queen View Post
      A kid... running around... WHY?!
      This particular childs loving and attentive scumbags... erm... parents were picking up some parts.

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      • #4
        Quoth Evil Queen View Post
        A kid... running around... WHY?!
        Don't tell me you expect parents to parent, do you? That's ridiculous.
        Excuse me, good sir paladin, can you direct me to your EVIL district?

        http://www.dywhcomic.com

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        • #5
          I totally believe it. My boyfriend's father has his own shop, and some of his employees are real white trash scumbags who sometimes have their kids at the shop with them (I don't want to speculate too much or stereotype, but I guess it may be the only time they have with the kids?).

          Yeah..it's really safe for kids to be around when the guys are hoisting a 600 pound engine up and it's really safe for kids to be around when a car is being lifted and there are sharp objects and tools around.

          One day I went with my boyfriend to look at an engine that his dad had picked out for him to put in his truck, and two little girls were jump roping nearby the engine that was sitting on the floor. Imagine one of them tripping over that thing.
          You really need to see a neurologist. - Wagegoth

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          • #6
            Quoth coldcupofjoe View Post
            A Saturn does not equal a Lexus
            Nah, but I bet you could probably run some impressive games on a Lexus...
            *seriously thought you meant a Sega Saturn first, had to think a few minutes to realize Saturn's a car...*
            "I call murder on that!"

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            • #7
              I remember when I was a kid and my dad worked at a car shop. My brother and I were either in the waiting room annoying the guy at the counter (my dad hated him so we never got in trouble) or we were outside well away from the cars playing. To let your kid run lose is shear stupidity.
              Honey and Thorns ~ Handmade Knit and Jewelry

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              • #8
                Our local, non chain, shop doesn't officially let customers into the shop area. If needed they will escort you back to your car if they need to show you something or explain a issue before you authorize work.

                We have been using the same mechanic for years and if you pull in to the lot and see him in plain view in the shop he dosen't mind if you take a walk i few feet to say hi.

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                • #9
                  I don't really know what to say about this one but I guess it's his blowout at 70 miles an hour.
                  Unless he swerves into oncoming traffic, then he gets to share the pain with some unwilling and undeserving innocent.

                  They REALLY need to make bi-annual vehicle inspections and driver testing mandatory... It MIGHT just keep some idiots off the road.
                  *There is no greater gift than to be reborn with every heartbeat*
                  *Grudges should only be held for as long as it takes to deliver a proper vengence!*

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                  • #10
                    No, it won't. But it MIGHT keep some idiots with unsafe cars and poor driving skills off the road. At best.
                    "I am not able rightly to apprehend the kind of confusion of ideas that could provoke such a question."

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                    • #11
                      Quoth coldcupofjoe View Post
                      These tires right here I highly recomend as you'll be getting the most bang for your buck and at $233 dollars for all four including labor these are really a good deal.
                      Holy shoot. I would jump on that deal before you finished the sentence!
                      Now would be a good time to visit So Very Unofficial!

                      "I've had so many nasty customers this week, my bottomless pit is now ankle-deep."-Me.

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                      • #12
                        I ran around Dad's shop all the time. *shrug* But that was HIS shop, not a place of business.

                        One day me and my sister took turns hoisting each other up on one of his jacks. It was all fun and games until we ran into the house with oily circles on our bottoms. :P (Dad thought it was hilarious - Mom, not so much.)
                        "Even arms dealers need groceries." ~ Ziva David, NCIS

                        Tony: "Everyone's counting on you, just do what you do best."
                        Abby: "Dance?" ~ NCIS

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                        • #13
                          Quoth Samaliel View Post
                          But it MIGHT keep some idiots with unsafe cars and poor driving skills off the road.
                          We have annual inspections here in PA. For the most part, you don't see as many rusted-out shitboxes as you used to. Some of that is because cars don't rust like they once did. Some of it is because the state's inspection program is more strict. Still, there are a few out there...mainly because some garages (usually in rural areas) will pass anything. Most don't--they have signs stating that they will not remove your catalytic converter, they won't mess with your emissions controls, etc.
                          Aerodynamics are for people who can't build engines. --Enzo Ferrari

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                          • #14
                            My state has a law now that customers (anyone who is not an employee) isn't allowed in a professional garage/shop any more. It used to be for say the yearly inspections that you'd drive your car into the garage and operate the lights, wipers, etc, for the employee. Now you have to park the car outside the garage and give them the keys and they drive the car in and do the inspection without you.

                            Oh, I guess the law does allow customers to go in when escorted by an employee, to look at damage, etc, but that's it.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Quoth tigerlily0 View Post
                              My state has a law now that customers (anyone who is not an employee) isn't allowed in a professional garage/shop any more. It used to be for say the yearly inspections that you'd drive your car into the garage and operate the lights, wipers, etc, for the employee. Now you have to park the car outside the garage and give them the keys and they drive the car in and do the inspection without you.
                              I don't like that law. I've been scammed by "inspection" shops before... I want to be able to watch. I'm fine with watching from a distance, but if you claim I have worn brake pads when they're at least half there, but can miss the cracked rotor... it was amazing how much the police wanted me to testify against that particular shop, too, when I mentioned it to them.

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