Pirates and Chase Boats and Thieves, Oh My!

[SailorMan]

My ship is docked in San Diego now, which means we're hooked-up to the pierside cable TV connection -- oh joy!

Yesterday morning, as I was getting ready for work, I watched something on the History Channel about 'modern day pirates.' It reminded me of my own pirate experience, a couple of years ago. We were transiting the Strait of Malacca northbound. Pirates there attack you a lot of times by coming up your stern, where the radar is the weakest (especially when they're in small, fast motor boats, which don't have much in the way of radar-reflective material). This is what happened to us; but luckily, our lookout spotted them when they were still a few miles away from us (and they weren't on radar!) So we sped up, and then rigged out some continuously running fire hoses on deck: they could see that anyone trying to grapple their way onboard would be washed back over the side, and broke-off their approach.

I told my girlfriend about this, and later on our conversation drifted to be about her place of work. Her supermarket chain has a nautical theme: they all wear Hawaiian shirts, and their manager is called the store's 'Captain,' the assistant manager is the 'First Mate,' and so on. I won't tell you the name of this chain, but I will say it isn't called "Trader Vic's".

Anyway, given the store's devotion to the shipboard experience, we thought it would be cool, when an employee spotted a shoplifter, if they would get on the PA and say: "Arghhhh, Mateys! Thar' be Pirates in aisle nine! Away the Master o' Arms! Catch the scurvy dog!"

[BethB]

I would love to work in a place that let us talk like pirates on the overhead announcements.

[Igorina]

I've seen the Straits of Malacca from the penninsula of Malaysia.

The friends I was traveling with didn't believe me about the pirates until I took them to one of the naval museums.

[PhotoChick]

I learned about pirates from Muse Magazine. Come to think, probably half the random stuff I know came from that magazine.

[TTAZ]

Totally OT but one time I was at "not Trader Vic's" and was singing along to the radio to myself, and one of the stockers offered to get me my frozen tiramisu for free if I went on the PA and sang "Radar Love".

In retrospect, I'm not entirely sure why I didn't do it.

[DeltaSierra]

I LOL'ed when I read that!! I'd love to hear that over the PA system!!!

[Animae]

I really wish I could talk like a prate at work.

I'm not entirely sure I can't. Maybe I'll try.


That's funny though.

[JustADude]

For some reason I recall reading something on these boards about one of our members being on a ship with a hidden HMG emplacement for just such occasions. A fire-hose may work as a deterrent, but nothing says "Fuck You" like a Browning M2.

[Jester]

I really wish I could talk like a prate at work.

I actually CAN. I work at a bar that has a heavy pirate theme.

Yes, my job rocks.

[Chromatix]

I suspect that many if not most ships are capable of being lightly armed. Many freighters and liners built in the inter-war period had strengthened decks to allow 3-inch and AA gun mounts to be added relatively quickly. Ships built *during* the war - including the Liberties - nearly always had something to defend themselves with. (Not that it helped much against the U-boats.)

Three-inchers won't do much to an actual warship (which will usually stand outside their effective range), but they're better than nothing, and will see off the vast majority of pirates. The AA guns can be used to repel boarders too. Any pirate group that manages to get a real warship will, I would hope, have an actual navy after them in double-quick time. Small boats are much easier to hide.

The olden-days, canonical pirates were normally actually mutineers - so they started off with a proper warship, or at least an armed merchantman, which is almost as good. Mutiny was punishable by death, so a life of piracy was often the only way out from under a tyrannical Captain.

[Phantomgrift]

Err... As one who is currently serving as an IS Petty Officer in the Navy, I would like to caution "Sailor Man" about getting to specific with posts of the above nature.

As fun as it is to tell of where we've been and what we've done, Operational Security needs to be maintained when posting online so as not to inadvertantly reveal information over an unsecure source.

[Darkwolf]

nothing says "Fuck You" like a Browning M2.

Quoted for truth

[smileyeagle1021]

A fire-hose may work as a deterrent, but nothing says "Fuck You" like a Browning M2.

isn't a M-2 a grenade launcher? if so, I like your thinking

[CaroPhoenix]

My Assistant Manager, Darkness, and I sometimes like to talk in Renn Speak. The regulars get into the spirit. Those coming in for the first time? They pause before they realize we're just joshing!

[hopie144]

Totally OT but one time I was at "not Trader Vic's" and was singing along to the radio to myself, and one of the stockers offered to get me my frozen tiramisu for free if I went on the PA and sang "Radar Love".

In retrospect, I'm not entirely sure why I didn't do it.

I LOVE "not Trader Vic's"! I went to the new location near my house and was walking down the wine aisle, just minding my own business, singing along to the radio and kinda dancing....and an employee had seen me and told me I should do that in one of their commercials. I was kind of embarrassed someone had seen me, but hey I was happy...hello, wine aisle.

Back on topic, I also would love to work at a place where I could be a pirate. I love me some pirates! Captain Jack is my fav!