From the mouths of babes

[bhskittykatt]

Boss Man's granddaughter and friend went to the mall to sit on Santa's lap. Their ages are three and four, respectively.

Boss Man's granddaughter told Santa she wanted a toilet plunger. She's too young to understand what it does, but thinks it might be fun. Her mother said she almost wants to get her one, since they're cheap, but is afraid once her daughter learns what it's really used for, that there will be a big mess.

Her friend told Santa she wanted a "crack-ho Barbie." Someone had to have taught her that since she's too young to understand it, though Boss Man's daughter says she doesn't know where she picked it up. I wish someone would have filmed Santa's reaction to that request, though!

[Ironclad Alibi]

These were apparently entries in a contest: Pimp Daddy Ken & Crack Ho Barbie.

[Crossbow]

I'm willing to bet that Santas get all sorts of completely off-the-wall requests from kids (probably after having been put up to it by a relative or friend.)

My favorite story (as relayed by a friend) was of a 3 year old that was carefully coached by a smart-a$$ uncle. Mom and Dad took him to see Santa at the mall and when asked what he wanted for Christmas calmly replied "Power of Attorney." I really wish I could have seen the looks on the parents' faces....

[AriGriffin]

I worked at a Santa photo booth at the mall during the Christmas of 2007.
Most of the requests were the usual toys, but some were weird...

remote control to control the parents
a mute button to work on a brother
a magic carpet
a real unicorn
a live snail

and some were heartbreaking...

food
for a parent to get a job
for a friend with cancer to get well.

[Legal Eagle]

when i played santa in a church fair one year the funniest one i had was a young boy (6-7) and his mum.

The kid asked for Grand Theft Auto:San Andreas (that specific), the mum showed no emotion at this, "i think that may be a bit old for you" was the only reply i could think off, so the mother suddenly asks what it is,. I try to explain that it's an adult video game with guns, drugs and killing. "but daddy let's me play with his" the kid suddenly pipes up.

I'm glad i wasn't daddy when mummy got home that day.

[Sapphire Silk]

when i played santa in a church fair one year the funniest one i had was a young boy (6-7) and his mum.

The kid asked for Grand Theft Auto:San Andreas (that specific), the mum showed no emotion at this, "i think that may be a bit old for you" was the only reply i could think off, so the mother suddenly asks what it is,. I try to explain that it's an adult video game with guns, drugs and killing. "but daddy let's me play with his" the kid suddenly pipes up.

I'm glad i wasn't daddy when mummy got home that day.

Why do I get the feeling dad only gets the kid on weekends?

[bainsidhe]

No crazy santa stories, I'm afraid. But I'm pleased to say that this was the first year that my niece didn't start screaming when introduced to santa (she's 5yr old now). Matter of fact, she was quite excited. Mommy curled her hair and she got all dressed up to meet santa. I'm still waiting on the picture.

[Shalom]

Boss Man's granddaughter told Santa she wanted a toilet plunger. She's too young to understand what it does, but thinks it might be fun. Her mother said she almost wants to get her one, since they're cheap, but is afraid once her daughter learns what it's really used for, that there will be a big mess.

This is funny, because I did get my then-three-year-old son a plunger. A sink plunger, though, not a toilet plunger.

All he knows about what it's for is that if I jam it against the wall, it sticks there. He finds this hilarious. What can I say, three year old humour is pretty basic.

(The Berenstain's Baby Book, published 1951, had a lot of tongue-in-cheek recommendations; one of them was regarding baby toys. Basically they said you can get lots of great toys for very little money, as long as you stay out of the toy department.

On your way to the houseware counter to get a set of brightly colored measuring spoons on a ring, stop by the hardware department and pick up the business end of a sink plunger; as Baby gets older, graduate to a larger size. ...

)