Narrowly avoided tip-suck

[HorrorFrogPrincess]

Had a brunch date earlier today. Our waitress was very nice and attentive, and my date wasn't a jerk or anything. Until we were leaving and I noticed no tip had been left. I made an excuse that I left my ring at the table and asked him to wait up front. Returned to the table and left a few dollars for the waitress.

Meh, he's not very interesting, anyway.

[chainedbarista]

for me, that's a deal breaker; i've heard the best way to learn about someone is how they treat staff in a restaurant.

[zombiequeen]

My husband was raised not to tip, because his parents are jerks. I explained it to him at our first date when I asked where the tip was, and that waitstaff makes less than minimum wage. He never knew before, which is sad.

He tips at least 25% every time now.

[bainsidhe]

Any chance he added it to the check? I rarely carry cash and always add the tip to the charge slip.

[HorrorFrogPrincess]

Any chance he added it to the check? I rarely carry cash and always add the tip to the charge slip.

This was a "Pay at the register" place.

[Mr Hero]

Any chance he added it to the check? I rarely carry cash and always add the tip to the charge slip.

This was a "Pay at the register" place.

I don't feel this answers the question. I've been to "Pay at the register" places and usually don't carry cash. The CC slip they give me usually has a line I can add in for tip.

[Falor]

My husband was raised not to tip, because his parents are jerks. I explained it to him at our first date when I asked where the tip was, and that waitstaff makes less than minimum wage. He never knew before, which is sad.

He tips at least 25% every time now.

My wife was the same way when we were dating, and would even check with me on how much to leave on the occasions that we went out on her dime. Now though, it's all back on my math skills with the electronic payments since we've got just the one primary account.

So yeah, there are those people out there who just don't know better. The poor dears.

[Phantomgrift]

I'll admit this is one I've always had to watch for.
A combination of being one step removed from poor and a string of unfortunate wait-staff encounters had got me to the point where I refused to tip for anything outside of above-and-beyond, Bronze Star medal kind of service.

Thankfully, my wife subtlety threatened me with immediate harm if I didn't learn how to start tipping in at least the 5-10% range.

Though, for the longest time, one of the events that had lead me to swear off all tips was a miserable experience at a particular Outback Steakhouse.

My service was beyond slow despite a nearly empty dining room, my waiter was curt to the point of being rude, my steak was indeed cold and when I tried for that "quietly talking about it" approach, I received the "we'll treat you like you've been a screaming asshole" response.

At that point, when the bill finally showed up, on that little line where you write in a tip? I simply penned in: "Get a better job."

It was honestly two to three years before I ever dared to brave an Outback again. Thankfully, I've determined that earlier event was some sort of rare fluke.

[justhere]

This is my first post, but I had to respond. When I was dating (married now, so no more dating except when hubby and I can afford a babysitter so we can do something fun), I would end relationships over how guys treated waiters and other staff at the venues we were going to. One guy I broke up with right outside the restaurant because I was so upset about how he'd treated our waiter. It was horrible, and the only reason I didn't break up with him in the restaurant was because I was already embarressed enough inside the restaurant, I didn't want to cause a scene. Fortunately, we'd met there after work, so after I broke up with him I went inside to give our waiter his tip - it was more than our meal cost, because he up with a lot of crap from my date that night and was incredibly polite the entire time. Another guy I broke up with because he did a "whatever", with the eye roll, when the security guard asked him to check his bags because book bags were not allowed in the museum. Guy was doing his job, and the signs were posted clearly. I always felt that if that is how he was going to treat other people, how was he going to treat me once we were past the initial stages of a relationship?

[Spork4pedro]

I also wonder if maybe it was left on the CC slip. I think in my adult life I've left an actual cash tip on the table maaaybeee...3-4 times total. I'm just not a cash person. (I know that most servers prefer this but I figure that I tip well enough I can do it anyway I want)

But I do also agree that if said tip was actually missing that it is a deal breaker for me as well.

[Racket_Man]

I'll admit this is one I've always had to watch for.
A combination of being one step removed from poor and a string of unfortunate wait-staff encounters had got me to the point where I refused to tip for anything outside of above-and-beyond, Bronze Star medal kind of service.

Thankfully, my wife subtlety threatened me with immediate harm if I didn't learn how to start tipping in at least the 5-10% range.

Though, for the longest time, one of the events that had lead me to swear off all tips was a miserable experience at a particular Outback Steakhouse.

My service was beyond slow despite a nearly empty dining room, my waiter was curt to the point of being rude, my steak was indeed cold and when I tried for that "quietly talking about it" approach, I received the "we'll treat you like you've been a screaming asshole" response.

At that point, when the bill finally showed up, on that little line where you write in a tip? I simply penned in: "Get a better job."

It was honestly two to three years before I ever dared to brave an Outback again. Thankfully, I've determined that earlier event was some sort of rare fluke.

Please Please Pease do not take one or two bad experiences and apply it to the whole of the waiters and waitresses out there. yes your responce to that particular situation was justified but not every server is "that" server.

unfortuenately in my job I have "suffer" for some mistake made by "some driver" years and years ago. I also have suffer the "they are JUST doing their job, why should I tip them" thing too.

[Peppergirl]

I feel compelled to advise everyone to please not turn this into a 'tipping -vs- non tipping' rant.

A couple of the comments are skirting the line a little, and I'd like to see us get back on track.

If anyone wants to debate the merits of tipping, feel free to start a thread over at fratching. Tipping threads over there tend to become...er...'lively', to say the least.

Thanks!!

[Phantomgrift]

No worries.
Like I said, my wife slowly brought me around to being a bit less stingy than I used to be.

[siead_lietrathua]

its a rare occasion when we dont tip. usually the been here over an hour before eating, rarely seen the waitress, resteraunt not even busy kinda deal. even then though, the whole group we are with will usually get 2 pennies each and put them infront of our plates. "our two cents" on their service.
we are jerks when we dont get to eat. heh.

[PepperElf]

i had a date who didn't tip and to be honest it kinda embarrassed me
my bf however is... very good about that. and about remembering the server's name too. his manners really make going out a nice experience