Today Ms. Dytch and I drove to our favorite Everything's-A-Dollar place, which had been renting space in a strip mall, but just moved across the street into a new building of their own. We drove up and immediately saw the VERY BIG SIGN filling the entire glass doorway which advised potential cusstomers that they have moved across the street, and that this location is now closed. As we began to drive away to go across the street, we spotted a woman angrily stomping toward the door with body language screaming "SC". I rolled down my window.
Dytch: "Ma'am, they've moved across the street."
She stops, turns and gives me the Cat Butt Face! Then she heads toward the door again.
Dytch: "Let's park and watch, this is going to be good."
Act I: She face-plants on the door and rebounds when it fails to open for her. She then yanks on the door handle. She yanks repeatedly with both hands.
Act II: She steps back and stares at the door for a minute of so with cow-like incomprehension. She then mashes her face on the glass next to the door (which is still covered on the inside by the VERY BIG SIGN). There are no lights on inside, but there is enough daylight to clearly see that there are no shelves inside, no merchandise, no retail slaves, nothing!
Act III: She starts slamming the glass with her fist and yelling "Hey! Unlock the !@#$%^&* door!" She then begins to kick the door. "Open this door right !@#$%^&* now! I know your store hours! You ain't supposed to close before 8! I'LL HAVE YOUR JOB FOR THIS!"
Act IV: Employees from adjoining stores are peeking out their doors and talking on cell phones. We decide that if the cops are to be called, they have the situation in hand. We drive across the street to the new location of Everything's-A-Dollar.
Dytch: "Ma'am, they've moved across the street."
She stops, turns and gives me the Cat Butt Face! Then she heads toward the door again.
Dytch: "Let's park and watch, this is going to be good."
Act I: She face-plants on the door and rebounds when it fails to open for her. She then yanks on the door handle. She yanks repeatedly with both hands.
Act II: She steps back and stares at the door for a minute of so with cow-like incomprehension. She then mashes her face on the glass next to the door (which is still covered on the inside by the VERY BIG SIGN). There are no lights on inside, but there is enough daylight to clearly see that there are no shelves inside, no merchandise, no retail slaves, nothing!
Act III: She starts slamming the glass with her fist and yelling "Hey! Unlock the !@#$%^&* door!" She then begins to kick the door. "Open this door right !@#$%^&* now! I know your store hours! You ain't supposed to close before 8! I'LL HAVE YOUR JOB FOR THIS!"
Act IV: Employees from adjoining stores are peeking out their doors and talking on cell phones. We decide that if the cops are to be called, they have the situation in hand. We drive across the street to the new location of Everything's-A-Dollar.
Comment