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  • Out of the mouths of babes...

    When my students say something cute, I try to remember to make it my status on Facebook after. So now I have lots of fun quotes saved up. I thought you might like them. They're in order from newest to oldest. Keep in mind this is just this school year. I had more the year before, but that would involve more traveling back in Facebook history. Maybe I'll add that later.

    "Ms. T, you're lucky. You don't have to work hard like we do." Maybe she's been watching the news...?

    "Ms. T, I didn't say a**, she did. I told her, 'You say the first part and I'll say hole."---said by one of my little angels today. They both got to go on a little trip to the office.

    Students trying to think of long o words--Student 1: "All we need to do is find one more with oe and we'll be done." Student 2: "I know! Ho Ho Ho!" I start thinking, "Uh oh." Then he continues: "Oh wait, that's o by itself, nevermind!" I know there's the innocent hoe, but my mind didn't go there.

    Student: "Ms. T, why do you make us learn so much?" Me: "Because that's my job. Mr. K won't pay me if he knows I'm not teaching." Student: *starts crying* "But sometimes it's so hard when you make us learn."

    I was told "You stec!" (You stink) on a note today by a student

    I wonder if the icon of a disk to save on documents will ever be replaced by something more modern? Part of me hopes not because that's my childhood calling. Part of me hopes so because try explaining to your 6 year old students how to save a document without having a lesson on what that thing is.

    We are reading "Arthur's Thanksgiving," in which Arthur has to direct a school play and can't find anyone to play the part of the turkey because the costume is silly. The story says, "Arthur kept thinking, 'Where can I find a turkey?'" My student: "HEB!" (a grocery store)

    Me: "I am on your face and I'm spelled c-h-i-n. What am I?" Student: "Pie!"

    Student to me during morning duty: "Are you hungry? You want some breakfast?" Me: "No, I'm good." Him: "In that case, would you mind if I ate? I'm starving." Apparently, he was confused slightly on who was the one in charge.

    Question: "What do spiders eat?" Answer: "Incest" Ew...

    Continuing the theme of "Make Ms. T feel old week": Kid, about picture on paper, "What's that?" Me, "It's called a Walkman. It's like an iPod but it's what we had when I was a kid." Them, "Oh, so it's from a long time ago, huh?"

    Bus driver to my students on a field trip to the circus: "Make sure you're nice and quiet because there are lions and tigers over there, and they don't like noise." A student: "Lions and tigers?" Me: "...and bears. Oh my!" All the kids, "Huh?" "What?" "There are bears too?" I felt sad.

    I had an interesting day. It involved an ER trip for a student to have the tip of his pinky re-attached.

  • #2
    Quoth TexasT View Post
    I had an interesting day. It involved an ER trip for a student to have the tip of his pinky re-attached.
    I'm dieing to know this one. O.o
    I can only please one person a day, today isn't your day, and tomorrow doesn't look good either.

    When someone asks you a stupid question, give them a stupid answer.

    Comment


    • #3
      Quoth TexasT View Post
      "Ms. T, I didn't say a**, she did. I told her, 'You say the first part and I'll say hole."---



      ...... "What's that?" Me, "It's called a Walkman. It's like an iPod but it's what we had when I was a kid." Them, "Oh, so it's from a long time ago, huh?"
      And when I was a kid, what was your Walkman, was my similarly sized transistor AM radio, with built-in speaker, and single earphone for private listening!



      PLEASE, keep these coming!



      Mike
      Meow.........

      Comment


      • #4
        Quoth TexasT View Post

        "Ms. T, I didn't say a**, she did. I told her, 'You say the first part and I'll say hole."---said by one of my little angels today. They both got to go on a little trip to the office.
        Clever little thing ain't she?



        Student: "Ms. T, why do you make us learn so much?" Me: "Because that's my job. Mr. K won't pay me if he knows I'm not teaching." Student: *starts crying* "But sometimes it's so hard when you make us learn."
        I don't know whether to consider that kid a potential struggler with need of extra assistance or to have my brain do the bit.



        I wonder if the icon of a disk to save on documents will ever be replaced by something more modern? Part of me hopes not because that's my childhood calling. Part of me hopes so because try explaining to your 6 year old students how to save a document without having a lesson on what that thing is.
        Short way to do it:

        To student: that save icon is based on what disks used to look like when computers first came into existence (hold up a 3 1/2 inch floppy) and as it is so common these days, nobody has thought of changing it.

        We are reading "Arthur's Thanksgiving," in which Arthur has to direct a school play and can't find anyone to play the part of the turkey because the costume is silly. The story says, "Arthur kept thinking, 'Where can I find a turkey?'" My student: "HEB!" (a grocery store)


        Me: "I am on your face and I'm spelled c-h-i-n. What am I?" Student: "Pie!"
        Om nom nom.



        Question: "What do spiders eat?" Answer: "Incest" Ew...
        Oh to be a kid and mangle your words, although I do have to wonder if it was purely innocent...




        I had an interesting day. It involved an ER trip for a student to have the tip of his pinky re-attached.
        I'd love to know about this one as well.
        The best professors are mad scientists! -Zoom

        Now queen of USSR-Land...

        Comment


        • #5
          Quoth fireheart17 View Post
          I don't know whether to consider that kid a potential struggler with need of extra assistance or to have my brain do the bit.
          He's not a struggler for the most part. He's pretty much average and right on target in all areas. He's just got his own way of looking at the world. He's also VERY sensitive and a huge worrier. He's the kind of kid who starts crying, you ask him why, and he tell you, "Didn't you hear on the news? A big storm hit Japan," and you wonder why a 7 year old would know or care.

          Quoth fireheart17 View Post
          Oh to be a kid and mangle your words, although I do have to wonder if it was purely innocent...
          That one was actually written down. I should've specified. Sorry.

          Quoth fireheart17 View Post
          I'd love to know about this one as well.
          It's a lot less exciting than you'd think (at least looking back). We have heavy, fireproof, metal doors. A student went to put the bathroom pass up and had his hand on the door frame. He moved out of the way to let another student get the pass, moving his hand into the doorframe, so the door closed on it. When he pulled his hand out, he left his fingertip behind.

          Comment


          • #6
            It may be less exciting, but none the less to say the least.
            I can only please one person a day, today isn't your day, and tomorrow doesn't look good either.

            When someone asks you a stupid question, give them a stupid answer.

            Comment


            • #7
              Gah! I know, right?

              Comment


              • #8
                Quoth TexasT View Post
                He's not a struggler for the most part. He's pretty much average and right on target in all areas. He's just got his own way of looking at the world. He's also VERY sensitive and a huge worrier. He's the kind of kid who starts crying, you ask him why, and he tell you, "Didn't you hear on the news? A big storm hit Japan," and you wonder why a 7 year old would know or care.
                Probably found out from parents. Although that kid sounds like a walking textbook for anxiety.


                That one was actually written down. I should've specified. Sorry.
                Still damn funny

                It's a lot less exciting than you'd think (at least looking back). We have heavy, fireproof, metal doors. A student went to put the bathroom pass up and had his hand on the door frame. He moved out of the way to let another student get the pass, moving his hand into the doorframe, so the door closed on it. When he pulled his hand out, he left his fingertip behind.
                ouch.
                The best professors are mad scientists! -Zoom

                Now queen of USSR-Land...

                Comment


                • #9
                  I had a comment I got from one of my Brownies a few weeks ago I thought you'd appreciate. We took them to a local pioneer museum for a field trip and the guide was showing them things from long ago that were used in various ways. She asked them what they thought an artifact was and the one little dear replied "Something from long ago like 1997?" I think all of us leaders felt very old at that point.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Some from last year:

                    (working on sight word "about") Me-If we were Canadian, we could say "aboot" Boy1-I'm Canadian! I eat Canadian bacon! Boy2-I love bacon! Girl-We should cook Ms. T until she tastes like bacon! Boy2-You can't do that. It's against the rules. No cooking teachers allowed. Girl-Why not? She probably tastes like chicken!

                    ‎"Oh, I get it. We're going to eat the carrot and pretend it's a root."

                    ‎(Talking about the word stupid.) "Ms. T, I don't say that word. Ever! I go to church."

                    Ms. T is the best teacher in the hole in tire wolrd. Beat that!

                    Me: ‎"Use this word (hot) in a sentence." Student-"My girlfriend is soooooo hot!"

                    While I was eating chocolate, "Ms. T, you better watch out, chocolate makes you have..." *pinches his upper arm's fat*

                    ‎"Ms. T, if you glue this 5 on backwards, it will look like a backwards five."

                    ‎"Ms. T, I don't think the boy in this picture is being very safe when he's skating. His eyes are closed." Me: "No, his eyes are like that because he's Asian."

                    TexasT was able to watch 80 first graders get so ecstatic about snow that they showed a joy us adults could only dream of. It was an amazing experience. The cutest part was them making "snow angels" in the gravel.

                    Two extremes: "Ms. T, so-and-so said a really bad word." "Ok, can you whisper it to me so I know?" "I don't know. It's really, really bad. I can't say it." "Say it really quiet." "Ok. Dang." Later that same day, "MR. S (coworker), SO-AND-SO SAID I WAS F******** STUPID IN THE BATHROOM!!!!" (or something like that)

                    ‎"Ms. T, I didn't know your glasses came off your face."

                    ‎"Ok, class, with this game, you match the picture of the peanut that has the addition problem and the picture of the elephant that has the sum." "Ms. T, I can't play that game. I'm allergic to nuts." I love my job.

                    Part 1: TexasT went into work this morning to get next week ready (and she will be there). She found get well cards from all her students. Bet you don't get 17 poorly written cards with very colorful pictures if you're sick (unless, of course, you are an elementary teacher as well ). They're adorable!
                    Part 2: TexasT is slightly disturbed that one of her get well cards says, "I want you." Creepy. Two others didn't quite finish their thoughts. "I hope you feel," and "I love." Lets theorize what he loves.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Quoth TexasT View Post
                      Some from last year:

                      (working on sight word "about") Me-If we were Canadian, we could say "aboot" Boy1-I'm Canadian! I eat Canadian bacon! Boy2-I love bacon! Girl-We should cook Ms. T until she tastes like bacon! Boy2-You can't do that. It's against the rules. No cooking teachers allowed. Girl-Why not? She probably tastes like chicken!

                      ‎"Oh, I get it. We're going to eat the carrot and pretend it's a root."

                      Me: ‎"Use this word (hot) in a sentence." Student-"My girlfriend is soooooo hot!"


                      TexasT was able to watch 80 first graders get so ecstatic about snow that they showed a joy us adults could only dream of. It was an amazing experience. The cutest part was them making "snow angels" in the gravel.

                      Two extremes: "Ms. T, so-and-so said a really bad word." "Ok, can you whisper it to me so I know?" "I don't know. It's really, really bad. I can't say it." "Say it really quiet." "Ok. Dang." Later that same day, "MR. S (coworker), SO-AND-SO SAID I WAS F******** STUPID IN THE BATHROOM!!!!" (or something like that)

                      ‎"Ms. T, I didn't know your glasses came off your face."

                      ‎"Ok, class, with this game, you match the picture of the peanut that has the addition problem and the picture of the elephant that has the sum." "Ms. T, I can't play that game. I'm allergic to nuts." I love my job.
                      All of those are cute and funny all at once
                      The best professors are mad scientists! -Zoom

                      Now queen of USSR-Land...

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Quoth TawnyMyst View Post
                        "Something from long ago like 1997?" I think all of us leaders felt very old at that point.
                        I know I'm old...
                        I was singing "Somebody to Love" to myself at UScan a couple months ago, and a little girl came up to me, maybe just barely above my belt line, strains to look up at me, and her face breaks into this huge grin... "Oh, my gosh! I love Glee!"
                        Ouch!
                        "I call murder on that!"

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Quoth Juwl View Post
                          I know I'm old...
                          I was singing "Somebody to Love" to myself at UScan a couple months ago, and a little girl came up to me, maybe just barely above my belt line, strains to look up at me, and her face breaks into this huge grin... "Oh, my gosh! I love Glee!"
                          Ouch!
                          LOL well...at least she's learning the "old" songs. Just think about how Bach and Beethoven feel. Their music is "ancient" and not many people know it...or if they do, it's beacuse they heard it on a commerical/tv show/movie.

                          Though, there are the few who took music appriciation and what not...so life is not all in vein.
                          I can only please one person a day, today isn't your day, and tomorrow doesn't look good either.

                          When someone asks you a stupid question, give them a stupid answer.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Preschool teacher came into my line today. She mentioned that since it's St. Pattie's day, the kids kept saying that they were going to 'punch' (pinch) her. She finally had to correct them since they were saying it so much!
                            My only regret is that I don't have a better word for "F@#k You".

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Quoth Amusement Gal View Post
                              St. Pattie's day
                              No. No. No. No. No.

                              I'm bringing disdain back...with a vengeance.

                              Oh, and your tool box called...you got out again.

                              Comment

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