Don't know if I did OK....

[GooseCreek]

Hey Gang! Long time lurker, yadda, yadda, yadda.

Last night I had my first real run in with a SC. I think I handled it OK....

<back> Went to "Sporting Goods of Richard" so that my partner E could get some walking shoes. The store is laid out so that the shoes are along the back wall with the center being mens, right side women’s/youth and left side being boots. Standing in the middle of the section you can see from side to side.

We went in and E had to go to the bathroom. He asked the associate, S, where it was and he had to walk past the right side to get to there. I stayed in the center and small talked with S until a couple of people came up to the women’s side (she went and greeted them) and another to the boots (ditto). E came back and we looked at the different shoes, found to pairs and went to where S was to get the sizes. While we were looking, another 4 groups of people came up and started asking her for sizes. S handled the rush really well, but couldn't get very far because all 6 groups were standing at the door to either get new sizes or take the ones she brought out. </back>

cast:
SC - the lady that came up on the right side while E was in the bathroom
SCH - her husband
GC - why me of course! ;-)
E - my partner
S - Sales Associate.

SC walks up to S and in the most condescending, belligerent tone says "I guess I only get one chance to get a correct fitting shoe?" (Said as a question, but with the 'get over here and serve me you stupid thing' tone in the voice.)
S apologizes, asks for the size, and goes into the back to get the shoe.
GC (witnessing this and snapping, and said loud enough for the department to hear): Hey E, don't you just feel sorry for the sales clerks who get slammed and have to try and help everybody?
SC: You just need to stay out of this. I was waiting over there for over an hour. And she only came over to me one time and then she helped all of you because you are just SO much more important.
GC: Well, she's obviously slammed and working alone. If you wanted a shoe maybe you should do like the rest of us and come to where she is.....
SC (cutting me off): Well I have been here longer than any of you
GC (getting talked over): you weren't here when we came up...
SC: <ramble ramble> you're just trying to bully me<ramble ramble>
GC: What ever lady (doing dong the "don't pay him any attention" hand gesture from Beyoncé’s Single Lady video). Just go away you're bothering me.
SC: (Thumping her chest): Yeah go ahead and hit me. Just hit me.
GC: (standing up to my 6'6" & smirking at her): Lady I don't even like looking at you let along touching you. Now . go . away, I'm trying to shop.

SC continued to rant for a while. I really just kept a smirk on my face, watched her in my peripheral vision and acted like she wasn't there. Finally she stormed off. E and I continued to shop and pretty soon SCH came up. S saw him first and called for a manger to come over because there was "going to be a fight" *her words.

SCH: Did you talk to my wife?
GC: yeah (pleasant smile on my face, looking at the shoes I was trying on, and watching him in the peripheral).
SCH: I don't like the way you were talking to her.
GC: Whatever (still not giving him eye contact)

SCH rambled on for a while, but I tuned him out. I did do the dismissive hand gesture and said "go away I'm shopping" a couple of times. He did move in closer trying to get me to "fight" with him. I just wasn't having any of it - I knew that he wanted me to make eye contact and I knew that would lead to the fight. So I just treated him like he wasn't significant/wasn’t there.

His last statement caught my attention, though: If you ever talk to my wife like that again I'll call the police.
GC: standing again, turning arms spread wide & laughing: Go ahead, I'm sure they will give you a ticket for it.
SCH: I'll do it. This isn't a threat
GC (uhm, yeah it is): Call them; I'll be shopping here for a while, plenty of time for them to show up.

SCH walks away with me laughing. S came over and I told her what was going on and that the escalation had nothing to do with her. I also talked to her manager who told me that the other couple was banned from the store.

Today I realized I didn't give my contact information - I have a feeling the other couple is going to call corporate and complain to "save face". So, I stopped by and wrote out an incident report and left my name, phone, and email address. The manger on duty and I talked for a while and he said that he really appreciated me coming back in and giving them that and that if SC/SCH called would I be willing to give a formal statement. I had no problem doing that- thanks to reading here, I wanted to stick up for the S as she couldn't (told him as much).

But, now I'm feeling iffy…. I kinda understand why the SC was feeling left out – other people she perceived as coming in after her were getting service and she wasn’t. But come on, there’s better ways to handle it. The fact that the people getting waited on moved to where S was coming out of the back room was kind of an indication of what SC needed to do. And the snotty tone was not called for. She needed to be called out on her behavior. But did I help at all? I probably just made her madder and she took it out on someone else. I want to say I did something good, but inside I feel like I didn’t do anything but make the situation worse….

Oh well, thanks for letting me vent.

[Food Lady]

All I can say is, what was SCH going to say to the police?? What charges? There's no law against talking. Whatever. Mature people calmly ask to speak to the manager, as I had a customer do today. I really respect her for not causing a scene and not even raising her voice while talking to the manager. I'm glad you were there to put those tantrum-throwing SCs in their place, and for being willing to back up the sales associate. Thank you.

[SemperFi]

While I think it's great that you stood up for the sales associate, you could both have been charged with Disorderly Conduct. In fact, I write those tickets almost every day. Sadly, there is quite a large chunk of society that cannot fathom social responsibility. Sounds like this SC and her husband certainly qualify.

[draggar]

All I can say is, what was SCH going to say to the police?? What charges? There's no law against talking. Whatever.

People like those two have no problems making up something that sounds good to the police. GC threatened them, GC threatened his wife, GC took a swing at them, etc.. They'll lie just to prove their point.

Of course, witnesses and security cameras will tell a different story but they'll usually don't think about that.

[LillFilly]

I think you did a good job standing up for the salesperson. Technically, you weren't addressing the SC, she approached you first, thus initiated contact. So I don't think they'd have much of a case of charging you with anything. If the store had wanted to be jerks, they could have thrown you both out, but luckily they had a spine. And I believe it would be the store who would have to ask the police to charge you, as it's private property. Also, if there's an altercation and someone wants to press charges, the other party has the chance to do so as well, so one or the other will usually back down and nobody is charged. At least, that's the way it works where I live, and mostly what I've seen at my job.

[Jetfire]

From the way you described it, you handled it very well. While you did respond initially, you (IMO Smartly) did what you could to just ignore the situation without escalating it (well without escalating it too much), leading to the couple escalating it themselves out of frustration. One of the most frustrating things for a bully is to be ignored.

And kudos for going back and reporting your side officially. Hopefully it won't be needed but it's good ammo to have at the ready.

[RecoveringKinkoid]

Well, I would say no suck on your part. If you suck, then I suck worse, I had sort of the same thing happen to me in a hardware store, but I wasn't as nice about it as you were. Same situation, too, some asshole pissed because he was too special to go find himself a clerk and instead begrudged the fact that

1. I was getting served because I went and got a clerk, and
2. I was a broad in a hardware store. Perish the thought.

There was language and the threat of violence. So personally, I thought you showed a remarkable level of restraint. But then, you're a big dude and you don't have to do much growling to establish your turf. Me, I'm a a foot shorter and female.

[wagegoth]

2. I was a broad in a hardware store. Perish the thought.

There was language and the threat of violence.

I'm the handyperson at home, not my husband. I've spent a lot of time in hardware stores over the years. There's an Ace hardware near my home that I use all the time, because the employees are helpful and not condescending because I'm female.

I get ignored at a store while men get helped, I'm out of there and I make a point to contact corporate to let them know why.

[RecoveringKinkoid]

It was in fact an Ace hardware that my "incident" happened in.

I offered to escort a man out into the parking lot and kick his ass. He didnt' take me up on it. In fact, he hurried off.

Py.

I think the clerk was scared of me after that.

Sometimes you have to act like a redneck to get your point across, alas.

[LillFilly]

Wow. I honestly don't think I've ever been ignored in a hardware store yet, though I've seen plenty of stories. Most everyone has been really helpful. Guess the day may come though. Only places I've really been ignored was *est *uy and 'Stacys.'

[terakhan]

The SC was in the wrong, period. As you said, you got there, and were able to sit and chat with S for a while before the rush started. SC claimed she had been waiting for an hour for her shoes.

If I asked for help with something and the person didn't come back in 10 minutes or so, I think I would be looking/asking around to ascertain if there was a problem. In even my most belligerent and stubborn days, I would never wait an hour for shoes.

She probably came right after you did and claimed the hour part to try to get you to back down because 'she was there first.' Just another EW that didn't get her way.

[GooseCreek]

Thanks, Gang! I guess I just needed to know that I did OK. Interesting about the possible Disorderly Conduct ticket, I hadn't thought about that. Except for the first comment to E and the laughing at the end, the rest of my conversation was at normal voice as I was trying to ignore them and make them go away. I'll keep that in mind for the next time (and why do I believe that there will be a next time.....