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My parents just got back from a brief vacation in Vegas. They told me they had an...adventure waiting for their flight home.
So mom and dad are waiting in the gate area for their plane to Milwaukee when along comes Drunky McPissedup, his son who must've been of legal drinking age and not far behind dad in the being wasted department, his wife and his daughter. As he's staggering into the gate area, Drunky falls over some old man and dumps or spills something on him.
Cue a loud and animated philosophical discussion which causes people sitting nearby to get up and move because they're afraid fists will soon start flying. Son is trying to play peacemaker and explains to the old man "We're sorry, we missed our first flight out and have been waiting a whole day for another one." As though that excuses Drunky's inebriated state. Meanwhile Drunky's wife and daughter, who my mom describes as looking like a couple of losers, are laughing their asses off. Tee hee hee, daddy's acting like a drunken fool again! Tee hee.
Finally old man calms down and accepts Drunky's apologies, but not before a call to security is made. Then it's finally time to board the plane, which is late getting into Las Vegas for some reason. Everybody's lined up to board when Drunky's wife asks "Now where did he go now?"
Son replies "He went to have a cigarette," and Drunky suddenly re-emerges, cutting in front of my mom in line to get on the plane back to Milwaukee.
Trying to find his way to his seat and dragging his carry-on behind him, Drunky manages to nearly fall flat on his face in the aisle when his bag gets tangled on something. As he passes the two flight attendants, one of them waves her hand in front of her nose in the "you stink" gesture. The other, noticing Drunky's behavior, says "He's not getting on my plane."
Everybody's seated, Drunky and his family in the "first class" section, and the flight attendant goes into the cockpit, presumably to get the okay to toss Drunky, which she does. So the flight attendants, along with a couple of plain-clothes air marshalls or cops or something, find Drunky and his family and tell him he has to go. Being led off the plane with his family, Drunky hollers "I'm never flying Southwest again!"--apparently missing that he's on a Frontier Airlines plane, with no connection to Southwest at all.
An announcement is then made that four seat with "stretch" seating have become available, and for the rest of the trip my parents refer to Drunky as Stretch. As in "I wonder where Stretch is now!"
So mom and dad are waiting in the gate area for their plane to Milwaukee when along comes Drunky McPissedup, his son who must've been of legal drinking age and not far behind dad in the being wasted department, his wife and his daughter. As he's staggering into the gate area, Drunky falls over some old man and dumps or spills something on him.
Cue a loud and animated philosophical discussion which causes people sitting nearby to get up and move because they're afraid fists will soon start flying. Son is trying to play peacemaker and explains to the old man "We're sorry, we missed our first flight out and have been waiting a whole day for another one." As though that excuses Drunky's inebriated state. Meanwhile Drunky's wife and daughter, who my mom describes as looking like a couple of losers, are laughing their asses off. Tee hee hee, daddy's acting like a drunken fool again! Tee hee.
Finally old man calms down and accepts Drunky's apologies, but not before a call to security is made. Then it's finally time to board the plane, which is late getting into Las Vegas for some reason. Everybody's lined up to board when Drunky's wife asks "Now where did he go now?"
Son replies "He went to have a cigarette," and Drunky suddenly re-emerges, cutting in front of my mom in line to get on the plane back to Milwaukee.
Trying to find his way to his seat and dragging his carry-on behind him, Drunky manages to nearly fall flat on his face in the aisle when his bag gets tangled on something. As he passes the two flight attendants, one of them waves her hand in front of her nose in the "you stink" gesture. The other, noticing Drunky's behavior, says "He's not getting on my plane."
Everybody's seated, Drunky and his family in the "first class" section, and the flight attendant goes into the cockpit, presumably to get the okay to toss Drunky, which she does. So the flight attendants, along with a couple of plain-clothes air marshalls or cops or something, find Drunky and his family and tell him he has to go. Being led off the plane with his family, Drunky hollers "I'm never flying Southwest again!"--apparently missing that he's on a Frontier Airlines plane, with no connection to Southwest at all.
An announcement is then made that four seat with "stretch" seating have become available, and for the rest of the trip my parents refer to Drunky as Stretch. As in "I wonder where Stretch is now!"
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