"What About Mah Lincoln?"

[blas]

An old gas station story tale.

I was an 18-19 year old girl working at a small gas station, alone. It was getting close to closing time.

Up pulls this older Lincoln and out comes a man weebling and wobbling. Oh, a drunk trying to get gas. Or, just parking by a pump and coming inside like a select few tards would do.

He wobbles in, and says, "Dontchas gots a hanger I can borrow? Ah locked mah keys in mah Lincoln!"

I looked under the counter a bit (pretended to), and replied, "I'm sorry, but I don't know if we do or not. If we do, it's gone."

That's when the booze he wreeked of starting turning the wheels in his head the wrong way. "Well, what am ah supposed to do?! That's my LINCOLN out there! Ah can't just leave it here!"

Since I figured I had nothing to lose, I said "Are you sure you should even be driving that fancy of a car after drinking a bit, there?"

(he was a regular PITA customer, so I figured the worst he could do was tell my boss he came in drunk and I was mean to him. Boo hoo.)

It wasn't a fancy car, by the way, either. It was an older Lincoln, nothing anyone would dash to steal. Anyone around these parts with a Lincoln or a Cadillac or whatever, they are usually older than dirt and not in the best of shape as is. But, the white trash people think it makes them look and seem important, eh.

Since we were a small gas station with a clientel of regular trash- I mean customers, I figured it wasn't worth getting in trouble for having him towed or anything, so I just left a note that his car was there, and told him, hoping he could still understand me, that he could leave his car until the morning, but he'd have to get someone to help him move it before it got to be the morning rush the next day.

[Kristev]

You did right by asking. Though a call to the police would probably have been wise.

[downforit2008]

Oh, definitely! The police are usually the ones who have the equipment to get a door open and to get your keys out of the car. I'm sure if you even HAD a hangar, he'd demand that you suddenly turn into the expert to pry the door open for him as well.

People should remember this stuff before they're thickheaded enough to lock their keys in the car. I've been driving for ten years now and it's NEVER happened to me because I can REMEMBER things like this. Plus, the doors on my last car never locked automatically like today's models do. I would have to literally use my key to turn it in the keyhole to lock it, and for THAT, I would NEED the key to do so! Therefore, it'd be IMPOSSIBLE for me to lock my keys in the car! Why don't they make cars like that anymore?

[Nonstop_Death]

Why don't they make cars like that anymore?

Because Logic is getting expensive.

[ADeMartino]

Oh, definitely! The police are usually the ones who have the equipment to get a door open and to get your keys out of the car. I'm sure if you even HAD a hangar, he'd demand that you suddenly turn into the expert to pry the door open for him as well.

People should remember this stuff before they're thickheaded enough to lock their keys in the car. I've been driving for ten years now and it's NEVER happened to me because I can REMEMBER things like this. Plus, the doors on my last car never locked automatically like today's models do. I would have to literally use my key to turn it in the keyhole to lock it, and for THAT, I would NEED the key to do so! Therefore, it'd be IMPOSSIBLE for me to lock my keys in the car! Why don't they make cars like that anymore?

The doors that could be locked without the key were considered a 'mandatory convenience' back when that idea was introduced in the 1960s. I hate doors that can be locked without a key. I like my old Fords that required you to lock the doors with the key from OUTSIDE THE CAR. Now, power locks and (ugh!) AUTO-locks are on every damned thing.

It amazes me the 'innovations' that the automakers come up with. Power windows? Okay, I could see that. But a few years ago, the 'new improvement' on the idea was ONE-TOUCH power windows. You have to only press the button for a split-second and the window rolls all the way down. HATE THEM. I had a car with that feature and it was annoying enough for me to sell the car only a few months later. Seriously? It was TOO HARD to push and hold a button? We had to come up with THIS?

You don't drive a 'car' anymore. You drive a damned video game. My belief, personally, is if you want all the comforts of home....STAY THERE.

Okay, this old fart is done ranting now. Go on about your business....

Okay, I'll stop ranting now. Damn, I'm old.

[Argabarga]

A lot of police departments will refer you to a locksmith/towing company if you lock yourself out, they have the tools, but they'd rather not spend the time doing it if they can help it, figuring it's a job better left to the roadside service industry and they also don't want to be liable for damage trying to get you back in.

Any modern car (like from about 1995 to current) is pretty much coat-hanger proof anyway so even if you had an old wire hanger, you probably won't be getting back in and will just scratch up your paint for nothing if you try.

[sms001]

Well, except for blocking one of the station pumps for a while the next morning, I'd say that worked out perfectly. If only more cars would lock their drivers out when they're drunk! Glad you're not in that biz anymore Blas.


On a side note, when the battery in one of our key-fobs failed, it sent out a signal. No, of COURSE not "Unlock" or even "Alarm." Dang things literally locked themselves in. In this case, the old wire trick did work, and distressingly easily; straight down from the top of the window to poke the door lock button on the bottom frame console.

[blas]

My 98 Neon was still very hanger-accessible, though those cars are such little shitboxes, they weren't meant to be very secure. It had manual locks, and I did have my dad help, and he did scratch the paint a bit, but he still got the thing undone. And I never locked my keys in there again.

If I had to guess, "Mah Lincoln" was definetly from around the time I was born, maybe even before that.

[neon81159]

My 98 Neon was still very hanger-accessible, though those cars are such little shitboxes, they weren't meant to be very secure. It had manual locks, and I did have my dad help, and he did scratch the paint a bit, but he still got the thing undone. And I never locked my keys in there again.

If I had to guess, "Mah Lincoln" was definetly from around the time I was born, maybe even before that.

I always carry a spare key in my billfold, in case I do lock myself out.

and I just bought a 2001 Neon a couple months ago..the day I bought it, I locked the drivers door, pumped gas, then tried to unlock it.. nope, key turns 360 degrees in the lock.. costs $50.00 to fix, more if parts need to be replaced.

I just leave it unlocked.. nothing to steal, glovebox is empty also.

[Raveni]

A lot of police departments will refer you to a locksmith/towing company if you lock yourself out, they have the tools, but they'd rather not spend the time doing it if they can help it, figuring it's a job better left to the roadside service industry and they also don't want to be liable for damage trying to get you back in.

I'm sure they would come if you said "Officer, there's a drunk guy who locked his keys inside his car. He's trying to open it with a coat hanger so that he can drive home."

[Shalom]

Some of the older ('80s) Lincolns could be opened without a key, if you went through the driver's side front fenderwell, accessed the wire harness that went into the door, and shorted two particular wires together. You could also bend a hanger into an S-shape and use it to unlatch the wing window; if your arm was skinny enough, you could then reach in and lift the button.

(Fastest way was through the back door, though. Those were much easier to bypass. I once saw another locksmith do it in six seconds, start to finish. I haven't been in the car-opening business since 1993, though, so I have no idea what they're doing these days.)

As to those lockout-proof doors that popped the lock button up every time you shut the door, you could override that "feature" by holding the pushbutton in as you shut the door. (That's the button on the handle that you pushed to open the door, not the one on the inside that you lifted to unlock. Two different buttons. Modern cars don't have either of those buttons, of course; they now have a horizontal lever for the lock, and a handle that lifts or pulls out to open the door; I can't see how you'd close the door while simultaneously pulling the handle, which would be the equivalent action on today's cars, but of course you don't have to anymore.)

[vloglady]

And even if you did give him a wire coat hanger to help unlock his door, he would scratch it. they he'd yell he's gonna sue you because it's all your fault. LOL (-:

[blas]

Backtracking to the auto windows.....when I got my new car two summers ago, at first I was puzzled why the hell if I touched that button too hard, the window went all the way down. I just wanted to crack it to smoke, not to make a wind tunnel while driving 70 on the freeway!

I love my keyless entry and remote start, though. I wouldn't change that for the world. I also love that I can program it to lock as soon as I start the car, or shift from park. Makes me feel a lot safer, and I don't have to remember to push down the lock every time I get in.

[Lovecats]

I love my keyless entry and remote start, though. I wouldn't change that for the world. I also love that I can program it to lock as soon as I start the car, or shift from park. Makes me feel a lot safer, and I don't have to remember to push down the lock every time I get in.

My car locks automatically when I put it in gear. I love that, too!

[cashierbex]

I helped my coworker with her Buick. She got to the point of breaking the car window. Not like its worth anything to steal or has anything worthy of stealing in it.

One of my friends hates her car enough to leave the keys in it unlocked and sometimes window open. She said as long as they leave the seat/steering wheel cover, its ok. They are worth more than her car