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I may have mentioned here about my trip back to Arizona in April, where surprisingly, my older sister (The Witch) and I mostly got along, but my younger sister (Lil Sis) was so belligerent and defensive that not only I was taken aback, but my older sister was as well; as was my mother, who though she normally defends her children (usually to her other children), made several comments on Lil Sis's behavior; as was my stepfather, who generally is driven mad by The Witch, but even he commented on what a PITA Lil Sis was. All of which was weird, because she had a new boyfriend, who came along with her on the trip, and seemed like a generally mellow and good guy, and for the life of us, none of us could figure what had crawled up Lil Sis's ass and died.
Well, today we had this exchange on a social network (with the names changed, of course):
LIL SIS: "So, tonight I brought home a bottle of the fella's favourite wine - and he brought home a bottle of mine. Awwww...."
--FRIEND ONE: "You two are so right for each other it's sickening...in a lovely way of course!
x"
--FRIEND TWO: "That is awesome...i say finish them both!!!"
--FRIEND THREE: "isn't that an o'henry story?"
--JESTER: "And the obvious question is: what are the wines in question?"
--LIL SIS: "That's totally not the point, my brother."
--JESTER: "Oh no, sis, I totally understand the POINT of the story. I think it's sweet and romantic, and I love the fact that it happened. But as a fellow wine drinker, I am still curious what your and his favorite wines are."
--LIL SIS: "Well, I like a nice Spanish Irrelevant, whereas Martyn's partial to a playful little Australian Talk About Something Other Than Booze."
--JESTER: "Sorry I asked."
--LIL SIS: "Aw, don't take it personally, Jester. Time and place. x"
Okay, call me crazy, but is she or is she not being totally snarky and rude here.
Look, we don't always get along, and there are times when she accuses me of being thoughtless and inconsiderate (and some of those accusations hold some weight, don't get me wrong), but here I was expressing interest in the details, and even after my initial possible faux pas of not LIKEing it or AWWWing it, still made it clear that I thought the whole thing was pretty cool, and was merely trying to find out what their favorite wines were. Why? To add depth to the story. As a fellow wine enthusiast. For potential future gifts. Because I am always curious about the details. Just plain curiousity. Take your pick. But, while she claims I don't often take an interest in her life*, here I am, doing just that, and she basically cuts me off at the knees, telling me that this was not the time or place. Well.....WHY NOT? I don't think I said anything inappropriate or embarrassing, or that I asked something that was not germane. I have always been interested in details, and she knows this.
So, am I wrong? Is she overreacting, than trying to smooth things over after the fact? (It should be noted that she, living in the UK, is five hours later than me, meaning most of these comments took place between 1 and 3 am her time.)
*(She gets upset if she sends me an email with 800 of the latest pictures of her dog, or her boyfriend, or locales near her, or any combination of the above, and I don't immediately look at every single one and make some comments. I'm sorry, but I have these things called A JOB and A LIFE. It is not just her that I don't always look at the pics of...I do this with most people, and few of them get upset, because they know that I have a life outside of theirs. Also, I am only slightly exaggerating when I say it's 800 pics of her dog. It's close. And I've never met her dog, so have no emotional attachment to it. It seems cool enough. But seriously, this strikes me as pretty much the same phenomenon as parents who can't understand why the entire world is not as blown away and awed by their children as they are.)
Feel free to tell me that I'm an unfeeling, inconsiderate wretch in all this. Or that she is just being snarky to be snarky. Or whatever. Just give me your honest opinion. Because I would rather have your brutal honesty, whatever it may be, than what you may think I want to hear.
I want to hear what you think is the truth, please.
Well, today we had this exchange on a social network (with the names changed, of course):
LIL SIS: "So, tonight I brought home a bottle of the fella's favourite wine - and he brought home a bottle of mine. Awwww...."
--FRIEND ONE: "You two are so right for each other it's sickening...in a lovely way of course!
x"--FRIEND TWO: "That is awesome...i say finish them both!!!"
--FRIEND THREE: "isn't that an o'henry story?"
--JESTER: "And the obvious question is: what are the wines in question?"
--LIL SIS: "That's totally not the point, my brother."
--JESTER: "Oh no, sis, I totally understand the POINT of the story. I think it's sweet and romantic, and I love the fact that it happened. But as a fellow wine drinker, I am still curious what your and his favorite wines are."
--LIL SIS: "Well, I like a nice Spanish Irrelevant, whereas Martyn's partial to a playful little Australian Talk About Something Other Than Booze."
--JESTER: "Sorry I asked."
--LIL SIS: "Aw, don't take it personally, Jester. Time and place. x"
Okay, call me crazy, but is she or is she not being totally snarky and rude here.
Look, we don't always get along, and there are times when she accuses me of being thoughtless and inconsiderate (and some of those accusations hold some weight, don't get me wrong), but here I was expressing interest in the details, and even after my initial possible faux pas of not LIKEing it or AWWWing it, still made it clear that I thought the whole thing was pretty cool, and was merely trying to find out what their favorite wines were. Why? To add depth to the story. As a fellow wine enthusiast. For potential future gifts. Because I am always curious about the details. Just plain curiousity. Take your pick. But, while she claims I don't often take an interest in her life*, here I am, doing just that, and she basically cuts me off at the knees, telling me that this was not the time or place. Well.....WHY NOT? I don't think I said anything inappropriate or embarrassing, or that I asked something that was not germane. I have always been interested in details, and she knows this.
So, am I wrong? Is she overreacting, than trying to smooth things over after the fact? (It should be noted that she, living in the UK, is five hours later than me, meaning most of these comments took place between 1 and 3 am her time.)
*(She gets upset if she sends me an email with 800 of the latest pictures of her dog, or her boyfriend, or locales near her, or any combination of the above, and I don't immediately look at every single one and make some comments. I'm sorry, but I have these things called A JOB and A LIFE. It is not just her that I don't always look at the pics of...I do this with most people, and few of them get upset, because they know that I have a life outside of theirs. Also, I am only slightly exaggerating when I say it's 800 pics of her dog. It's close. And I've never met her dog, so have no emotional attachment to it. It seems cool enough. But seriously, this strikes me as pretty much the same phenomenon as parents who can't understand why the entire world is not as blown away and awed by their children as they are.)
Feel free to tell me that I'm an unfeeling, inconsiderate wretch in all this. Or that she is just being snarky to be snarky. Or whatever. Just give me your honest opinion. Because I would rather have your brutal honesty, whatever it may be, than what you may think I want to hear.
I want to hear what you think is the truth, please.
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