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As this wasn't really *Life* Advice, didn't know if this should go there or not. Apologies.
So anyways, there's not a lot of kids in our neighborhood, just two girls that are sorta kinda near my kid's age. One of them, I'm perfectly fine with, she's a sweetie, and she understands how I don't want random kids inside the house.
Second one, I've mentioned here before, she's disobedient, and the subject of this thread. We'll call her Mab. She's eight, which means, she knows better for a lot of things.
So, Mab visited yesterday, and there was a small incident where I found a baby frog, and brought it to the kids to see. I explained they needed to be gentle, and as my kids are very gentle with small things, left it at that. An hour later, my oldest comes in crying that the frog is dead, and I run out to see what happened. Mab claims it just "fell over dead", I suspect bullcrud, but take the frog away and bury it.
Today, Mab comes by again, and they find a second baby frog. Alllrighties, I explain how to be gentle again, and have to leave for a bit to talk on the phone with family. I'm checking on them frequently, so I figured, not a big issue. I noticed after about 20 minutes, that the frog is gone, and my oldest explains that the frog ran away. Ok, at least its alive.
Well, an hour later, Mab complains she's hot, and hungry, so I give the kids all popsicles. She doesn't even say thank you, but my kids do. Eh, whatever. After she devours it, she asks for more snacks. I explain that I don't want to cause problems for her parents, but then my kids also ask, and I offer a snacksize applesauce, with the stipulation of no more snacks. Again, no thank you, just nom nom. Alllllrighties.
I'm cleaning house, when Mab sends in my oldest to ask for more snacks. I explain no, and then she explains "Mab says that she wants you to cook her food, she says her mom never feeds her, and that you have to make her food." Say WHAT.
Lemme tell you, that kid is OBVIOUSLY not underfed, she's quite healthy looking.
I say no, but hey, if they're really THAT starving, I have raisins. Mab says no, she wants me to COOK food. Yeah well, that ain't happening, if she wants food, she's more than welcome to go home, and she can come back afterwards. Mab declines, and skips off to play more.
A few minutes later, both of my kids come in crying, Mab shot them with the hose at full blast. I change their shirts, go outside and am very stern, explaining that if the hose goes on again, there will be TROUBLE. Mab puts on an innocent face, and says that it was an accident. BS. I go back inside to pop the shirts in the laundry, and as I come back upstairs, kids are awaiting me, crying, because Mab shot them AGAIN.
I go outside, tell Mab to cut it out. Literally. And that if stuff keeps going on, she'll need to go home. Mab pouts, but walks off from the hose.
At this point, I'm very frustrated. So when my oldest comes in not FIVE MINUTES later and tells me Mab is saying she wants to come inside and play (cardinal rule, no kids inside, she KNOWS this)...and suddenly....behind her I see Mab, sneaking into our den, I snap (sort of).
In the words of Rarity, OH. IT. IS. ON.
Mab claims she just "needs to use the bathroom". Yes well, you have no idea where the bathrooms are, use the guest one, and then you need to go home. You can come back later tonight, but playtime is now over. Mab then loudly says in front of the kids "Well if I have to go home, IM NOT COMING BACK TO PLAY AGAIN."
This floors my poor kids, who look horrified, and my younger one nearly bursts into tears. I inform Mab that well, that's just too bad, go potty, and that I'm sure we'll see her again later.
After mab's inglorious departure, my oldest is near tears, and I ask her what happened outside. Its then I hear the worst part of it.
Remember the frog I mentioned? That randomly disappeared? Apparently, Mab was torturing it, prying its mouth open and trying to shove rocks in there. My kids took it away from her, telling her that was not good to do, and Mab promptly grabbed it back. And then, "tried to shove a stick up its butt, and was laughing, saying look its a frog on a stick". Its a bit jumbled at this point, because it upset my kids a lot, but somehow there was a struggle over the frog and it escaped down through the planks in the porch.
I don't know what to do now. I am extremely ticked that she'd do this, and that she constantly acts this way....but I know this neighborhood. If I exile the kid, we're gonna be seen as the bad guys, and it'll be very difficult for my kids to make friends. I guess at this point, I'm going to have to completely keep a constant watch on them, whenever Mab is over. This is going to cause massive problems, frankly, I'm gonna have to basically just do my work at night, which will torch the last bits of free time that I have.
So, so frustrated, and not sure how to handle this, besides the constant monitoring. Which, of course, shoots me in the foot.
So anyways, there's not a lot of kids in our neighborhood, just two girls that are sorta kinda near my kid's age. One of them, I'm perfectly fine with, she's a sweetie, and she understands how I don't want random kids inside the house.
Second one, I've mentioned here before, she's disobedient, and the subject of this thread. We'll call her Mab. She's eight, which means, she knows better for a lot of things.
So, Mab visited yesterday, and there was a small incident where I found a baby frog, and brought it to the kids to see. I explained they needed to be gentle, and as my kids are very gentle with small things, left it at that. An hour later, my oldest comes in crying that the frog is dead, and I run out to see what happened. Mab claims it just "fell over dead", I suspect bullcrud, but take the frog away and bury it.
Today, Mab comes by again, and they find a second baby frog. Alllrighties, I explain how to be gentle again, and have to leave for a bit to talk on the phone with family. I'm checking on them frequently, so I figured, not a big issue. I noticed after about 20 minutes, that the frog is gone, and my oldest explains that the frog ran away. Ok, at least its alive.
Well, an hour later, Mab complains she's hot, and hungry, so I give the kids all popsicles. She doesn't even say thank you, but my kids do. Eh, whatever. After she devours it, she asks for more snacks. I explain that I don't want to cause problems for her parents, but then my kids also ask, and I offer a snacksize applesauce, with the stipulation of no more snacks. Again, no thank you, just nom nom. Alllllrighties.
I'm cleaning house, when Mab sends in my oldest to ask for more snacks. I explain no, and then she explains "Mab says that she wants you to cook her food, she says her mom never feeds her, and that you have to make her food." Say WHAT.
Lemme tell you, that kid is OBVIOUSLY not underfed, she's quite healthy looking.
I say no, but hey, if they're really THAT starving, I have raisins. Mab says no, she wants me to COOK food. Yeah well, that ain't happening, if she wants food, she's more than welcome to go home, and she can come back afterwards. Mab declines, and skips off to play more.
A few minutes later, both of my kids come in crying, Mab shot them with the hose at full blast. I change their shirts, go outside and am very stern, explaining that if the hose goes on again, there will be TROUBLE. Mab puts on an innocent face, and says that it was an accident. BS. I go back inside to pop the shirts in the laundry, and as I come back upstairs, kids are awaiting me, crying, because Mab shot them AGAIN.
I go outside, tell Mab to cut it out. Literally. And that if stuff keeps going on, she'll need to go home. Mab pouts, but walks off from the hose.
At this point, I'm very frustrated. So when my oldest comes in not FIVE MINUTES later and tells me Mab is saying she wants to come inside and play (cardinal rule, no kids inside, she KNOWS this)...and suddenly....behind her I see Mab, sneaking into our den, I snap (sort of).
In the words of Rarity, OH. IT. IS. ON.
Mab claims she just "needs to use the bathroom". Yes well, you have no idea where the bathrooms are, use the guest one, and then you need to go home. You can come back later tonight, but playtime is now over. Mab then loudly says in front of the kids "Well if I have to go home, IM NOT COMING BACK TO PLAY AGAIN."
This floors my poor kids, who look horrified, and my younger one nearly bursts into tears. I inform Mab that well, that's just too bad, go potty, and that I'm sure we'll see her again later.
After mab's inglorious departure, my oldest is near tears, and I ask her what happened outside. Its then I hear the worst part of it.
Remember the frog I mentioned? That randomly disappeared? Apparently, Mab was torturing it, prying its mouth open and trying to shove rocks in there. My kids took it away from her, telling her that was not good to do, and Mab promptly grabbed it back. And then, "tried to shove a stick up its butt, and was laughing, saying look its a frog on a stick". Its a bit jumbled at this point, because it upset my kids a lot, but somehow there was a struggle over the frog and it escaped down through the planks in the porch.
I don't know what to do now. I am extremely ticked that she'd do this, and that she constantly acts this way....but I know this neighborhood. If I exile the kid, we're gonna be seen as the bad guys, and it'll be very difficult for my kids to make friends. I guess at this point, I'm going to have to completely keep a constant watch on them, whenever Mab is over. This is going to cause massive problems, frankly, I'm gonna have to basically just do my work at night, which will torch the last bits of free time that I have.
So, so frustrated, and not sure how to handle this, besides the constant monitoring. Which, of course, shoots me in the foot.
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