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  • I'm upset and I just need to post

    I actually had a good day at work today. It was insanely busy with back to school, and I was running all over helping customers, but I like solving problems for people. Then my mood got ruined. I came home and ate, got into basically pajamas, and went to church. (Yeah, I wear PJs to church sometimes. ) We were almost at the end of a prayer service with the lights down and windows open, since the weather is so nice and cool today, when a bat flew in. No one noticed it right away, and most were unsure what to do after it was spotted. The minister was hiding behind his wife, lol, because he has had baaad experiences with bats, and ended up running out the building. I am a vegetarian and feel bad about killing even bugs, so I kept saying "Don't hurt it" and "If we let it be it won't hurt us." I know there are ways to get one out of a building without killing it, which by the way, is a federal offence. I have had a bat in my apartment. Anyway, Brother X kept swatting at it with a pillow from the couch, which was agitating it even more, while I kept pleading with people not to hurt it. He got it into a corner by swatting it down out of the air and stomped it to death. Now, I know he was just reacting, as guys are wont to do, but that was unnecessary and upsetting to me, so I yelled his name and told him so very loudly, adding he'd just killed a protected animal. I admit I wanted to smack him--not proud of that--so I said, "I'm outta here," grabbed my stuff, and ran out as he kept saying, "They're pests...." in a pleading voice. When I got to my car, a friend who hadn't gone in was in her car and asked what was wrong, and I told her, and it was clear I was upset. I must have looked crazy because our other friend came out and was trying to figure out what was going on. I zoomed out of there and went home and cried. I left to avoid saying or doing something I'd regret, and I'm sure Brother X feels bad about it now. He's not a jerk. *sigh* Now I will have to find some way to talk to him about it, as we don't believe in leaving conflict to sit. Of course I care about the animal, but the human relationship mustn't be broken. It's just gonna be uncomfortable. Thanks for "listening" y'all.
    "Is it hot in here to you? It's very warm, isn't it?"--Nero, probably

  • #2
    They aren't pests...not to me. Not when there is a couple near me that keep the insect population down enough that the city doesn't have to spray around here.

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    • #3
      I was sitting there transfixed by it, watching it fly. Once I got to see one up close (that time in my old apartment--it had settled into my window frame), I saw how cute they are. I felt sorry for it; it was agitated and trying to get out. Poor little thing. I hope it died instantly; I can't bear to think of it suffering.
      "Is it hot in here to you? It's very warm, isn't it?"--Nero, probably

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      • #4
        I think I'd have done this in this order, smacked the hell out of Brother X and then reported him to the authorities. I like bats, (given that I think Vampire bats look cute lol). How would Brother X like it if he got lost somewhere on his way home and then someone started hitting him and stomping the hell out of him?!

        I have a bat buddy somewhere around here, anytime he's around and I make a sqeaking noise out of my back bedroom window, he flies past as if to say hello.
        I am the nocturnal echo-locating flying mammal man.

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        • #5
          What a bad experience for you, brother X and the bat. So sorry to hear about your beautiful day ending so badly.....

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          • #6
            *huge hugs* That was horrible! I hope that the relationship-stuff can be sorted out quickly, and please don't feel bad for reacting like you did. *hugs*

            I love bats too and have loved them ever since I found two ghost bats roosting near our campsite when I was a teen. They were so tiny and adorable!
            Don't tempt pixies, it never ends well.

            Avatar created by the lovely Eisa.

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            • #7
              I would have been really upset too. There are better ways to handle something like that.

              I think it depends on what species it was whether or not it was federally protected. But that doesn't excuse how he handled it.

              Bats are really cool, IMO. They lived in my old neighborhood, and if you walked around at dusk you could see them flying around.
              "If you pray very hard, you can become a cat person." -Angela, "The Office"

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              • #8
                I'm sorry. I like bats, too. People just tend to freak out about them due to all the stupid old vampire movies, not to mention being scared of rabies (don't blame them for worrying about that part, but you don't stomp on one if you're worried about that).
                When you start at zero, everything's progress.

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                • #9
                  Thanks, you guys. I feel a bit better, but I tear up if I picture it, 'cause I watched it happen.
                  "Is it hot in here to you? It's very warm, isn't it?"--Nero, probably

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                  • #10
                    Not a great experience all around, to be sure. (hugs).

                    Bats stir up lots of odd emotions in people - they have some odd associations that go back a long time, most people have very little accurate knowledge about them, and a lot of people have rarely, if ever encountered them.

                    We had one come into our garage one evening when my daughter and I were working on something (hubby was away), and though we weren't terrified, we weren't too keen on having it touch us, plus we knew the local bats were protected, and if it decided to take up residence, we wouldn't be able to send it packing, we'd have to learn to live with it. So it was probably pretty funny, both of us with brooms trying to very gently guide it out without hurting it, but make it clear it wasn't welcome to move in. All the time throwing our arms around our heads when it swooped.

                    As for Brother X, unless he has a history of some bat-caused trauma or a morbid fear of them or been bitten by one in the past or something, I would be a bit concerned about him. Your comment :
                    He got it into a corner by swatting it down out of the air and stomped it to death. Now, I know he was just reacting, as guys are wont to do"

                    Sorry, I know males & females do sometimes react differently to things, but that's way, way beyond a normal "guy" reaction, to trap an animal & stomp it to death. Heck, my hubby the tough sailor would never hurt any type of animal unless it was absolutely necessary - I've seen him open a door to let a moth out, rather than kill it unnecessarily. I've never seen anyone without some sort of obsessive fear, or serious anger issues, who would stomp an animal to death rather than simply try to just get it out of the house, unless it was actually attacking somone.

                    Hopefully you can talk to him, and get to the bottom of why he reacted so badly. I have a relative who would probably have reacted that way - he's had a total fear & revulsion for bats since being bitten by one, and having to undergo the series of rabies shots (extremely painful, as this was back in the 70's, before less painful treatments were found) since it couldn't be determined if the bat was rabied or not.

                    Again, hugs, it was definitely something I would be upset over as well.

                    Madness takes it's toll....
                    Please have exact change ready.

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                    • #11
                      Yeah, our minister is the one who had the awful bat experience, and he just hid behind his wife before running outside.
                      "Is it hot in here to you? It's very warm, isn't it?"--Nero, probably

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                      • #12
                        Oh geez that's horrible! <hugs> Food Lady.

                        We had a grounded bat in our apartment building. We think it somehow either flew or fell from the shared loftspace down through the utility cupboard and the under the gap at the bottom of the door. Poor thing was exhausted and couldn't fly so my boyfriend managed, with a lot of swearing and maneuvering) to get it into a shoebox. We put a clean cloth for it to hide under, some water and some airholes in the lid, taped the lid down and drove over to the wildlife centre, where there was a small vet/hospital for wild animals.

                        The little guy did NOT like the car, he squeaked everytime we went over a bump! Once we took the lid off the box so the vet could check his wings he took off flying like....well like a bat out of hell really! She managed to catch him when he landed on the curtains, checked him over and said he was fine, probably just tired and a bit stressed. She told us to keep him in the box with water and the cloth to hide under until dusk and then release him out in the garden.

                        We did, he flew away and we saw him go back into a gap at the outside of our building so we knew he got back to the rest of the colony OK. Luckily we've not had anymore in the building since, but in the summer evenings we do see/hear them going off the hunt for the night. It's lovely having them around, they eat all the annoying bitey midges.
                        "I fell out of favour with heaven somewhere and I'm here for the hell of it now"

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                        • #13
                          it's hard for me to say how i'd have handled it.

                          i don't remember where i learned my fear but... when I was growing up, a lot of the girls feared the bats would somehow tangle in our hair. so even to this day, being buzzed by one makes the skin on my back crawl. even now, thinking about it.

                          i mean sure i've seen educational things about them, see them flying up eating bugs and know they eat bugs that i dislike. so i harbor no hatred. but my skin still goes all weird if they get close.

                          i've had 2 semi-close encounters myself.

                          first was in nursing school. the bat knocked itself unconscious and a maintenance man was going to beat it with a shovel. the other students freaked and said they'd get a straw and CPR it back to life if he dared. So he conceded and used the shovel to pick it up and put it outside instead.

                          second was in my inlaw's cottage. bats had gotten into the walls and one was flying around inside the upstairs bedrooms. we ended up huddled in one room altogether while it swooped around the ceiling. don't remember what happened to it - i think it went outside eventually. Tho i do remember that sis's MIL called the exterminator the next day and he blocked off the vents that they'd been using to get inside. so afaik it's been bat-free ever since.


                          which reminds me... i finally saw my first cicada the other day. bleh. They look like flying roaches.

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                          • #14
                            when I was growing up, a lot of the girls feared the bats would somehow tangle in our hair.
                            Thats one of the worst misconceptions about bats ever, unsuprisingly, it's the movie industry to blame. The reason they fly near is because people attract bugs, the chances of bats actually getting tangled in your hair are slim to none. They can fly within a milimeter of something (even something as small as a hair) and not hit it.
                            I am the nocturnal echo-locating flying mammal man.

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                            • #15
                              ya i know that... still it doesn't stop my skin from crawling if they get within a foot or 2 of my head.

                              i just don't take it out on them.

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