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for the first time, I understand why people kill themselves

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  • for the first time, I understand why people kill themselves

    Well, what was supposed to be the best day of the year for me has turned into easily one of the worst in my life, and honestly, at points, wished it was the last day of my life, which isn't true, quite honestly, I wish I had been aborted.
    Today was supposed to be, or what I was told, was going to be the first day of my dream job. The staffing company I worked with twice confirmed to me that I started Monday, September 24th, and 8am. That is when I showed up to the job site only to be told, we fired you for no calling no showing all of last week when you were supposed to start.
    So, now, I have no job (my old job has a 6 month reapply policy, so can't go back for at least 6 months, not that I'd want to go back), no prospects for a job (the staffing agency gave me a woops and we'll try to find you something else, which I know there isn't. My degree isn't worth the paper it's printed on, because honestly, employers don't give half a shit about education, all they care about is experience, and I have absolutely none, unless I want to go back to customer service and live in poverty the rest of my life as I pay off said useless degree), and a husband and a mother telling me I should go on the war path against the staffing agency, as if in a right to work state that will get me anywhere except frustrated and even more depressed than I am already. As it is, I give it two months, maybe three of unemployment, before I have to apply for foodstamps, the beautiful thing about that though is the card can be sharped enough to kill myself with, which I think is the entire point (culturally in Utah suicide is viewed better than being on public assistance. The dominant religious belief in this state is that you must help the needy, but you are going to hell if you ever become one and fail your God given obligation to support yourself and your family).
    And the worst part of all of this, is my mother is supporting me, she refuses to tell me that I've failed, despite the fact that all the evidence says otherwise. I failed to get into a school who's degrees are worth anything (in Utah there is but one university, and depending on who you ask, that is BYU or UofU). I failed to find a job on my own, instead depending on a staffing agency. And I failed to use better judgement in who to trust, getting myself into this situation. Sounds like an awful lot of failure on my part, and it sickens me to hear people talk of how great I am, when I know it's all a lie.


    And before anyone freaks out, no, I'm not even close to killing myself, I'm far too cowardly to actually do that, because I know that hell will await me if I do... at this point it may be unavoidable, but I sure as hell (is there a pun there, wasn't intended if there was) plan on putting it off as long as I can.
    Last edited by RecoveringKinkoid; 09-25-2012, 03:39 AM. Reason: Fratching.
    If you wish to find meaning, listen to the music not the song

  • #2
    Did you have the start date in writing?

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    • #3
      I might get banned for saying this.. FUCK IT!

      There are times to look in the mirror and say "Enough is enough. I am causing this." Then there are times when you look in the mirror and say "Are you going to take this lying down?"

      The Staffing agency saying "Whoops!" is not sufficient. The company saying "We fired you after no direct contact, or attempts at such." is not sufficient. I know you hurt. I know you feel the weight of the world right now.

      GET.
      MAD.

      Call up and ask for the company's CEO. If they refuse, ask for their legal department. Scream. Bitch. Take every nasty entitled trick you've heard from here and use them. Get a meeting. Lawyer up. Pretend to have a lawyer. THEN get on the phone and reduce every drone from the staffing company to a quivering mess until you get someone with authority speaking to you.

      Threaten.
      Scream.
      Call back thirty five straight times until you make them hang up at the sound of your voice. Then have someone else call them and take over the phone.

      You hear people, on this site, acting in such a manner over a $20 overage, or waiting in line for thirty seconds. This is the EXACT time you should act in such a manner.

      You have already tried being polite and respectful. You were abused.

      BE.
      A.
      BITCH!!

      And fuck anyone who tries to stop you. You were promised something. Go get it.
      Last edited by RecoveringKinkoid; 09-25-2012, 03:40 AM. Reason: We do not condone illegal activities at CS.
      You hold power over me and abuse it. I do not like it, and say so. Suddenly I am a problem.. FIND. A. MIRROR!

      Comment


      • #4
        Smiley, listen to me carefully:
        You.
        Did.
        Nothing.
        Wrong.
        The staffing company I worked with twice confirmed to me that I started Monday, September 24th, and 8am.
        You said so yourself. You checked! TWICE! YOU did everything right. What the hell else were you supposed to do? Camp out in the parking lot in the off chance the professionals who GET PEOPLE JOBS FOR A LIVING screwed up the date? You had no way of knowing. None.
        Be smart. Take the help you can get, fuck whatever the hell anyone else thinks and WORK YOUR ASS OF DAY IN AND DAY OUT TO GET SOMETHING! I know it's your dream job. I know you wanted it badly. But set that aside right now. That door is closed for now. FOR NOW. Find something temporarily.
        Want me to give you the site to an @Home call center I know that's legit? They're hiring now.

        EDIT:
        Quoth yeahwhatev View Post
        FUCK IT
        Or that
        I have a...thing. Wanna see it?

        Comment


        • #5
          Unless dream job has already replaced you (which I doubt could have happened in less than a week), get on the staffing agency's back about them going to dream job and telling them they fucked up. And while you're at it, make them give you a letter, in writing, of their culpability.

          You did nothing wrong. There is zero reason anyone should have any reason to believe that the staffing agency that got them a position fucked up the date.

          It is also curious that the dream job made no effort to contact either you or the agency (and if they did contact the agency, then ) despite expecting you to be there bright and early Monday morning.

          You don't have to be an SC, but you sure as hell don't have to be passive about this. You can be a pest without ever crossing the line.

          Were I in your position, I would be camped out in agency's office (not like you have a job to be at ) until they fixed what they fucked up or they got me another job.

          ^-.-^
          Last edited by Ree; 09-24-2012, 11:38 PM. Reason: Fixed smiley
          Faith is about what you do. It's about aspiring to be better and nobler and kinder than you are. It's about making sacrifices for the good of others. - Dresden

          Comment


          • #6
            The company also f'd up - they got a staff member from an agency who then pulled a NCNS and they didn't contact the staffing company to find out what was going on? WTF! That could have been fixed by a few phone calls the first day. Many people let you down on this.

            I've lived in Utah and needed assistance - I never got that vibe - the food bank people were esp. nice and understanding, but I didn't grow up in Utah so maybe I missed something - or they realized I recently married a person the same relgion as the food bank and were on their best behavior?

            Comment


            • #7
              smiley, you did EVERYTHING right. This is not your fault. If you won't believe the people who love you, believe a near total stranger. YOU DID NOTHING WRONG.

              There is no shame in using a staffing agency to get a job. There is no shame in needing assistance. Bad shit just happens, and sometimes it happens to good people. You're not special. This didn't happen to you because you deserved it. It just happened.

              Call your dream job, ask them to give you a chance. Beg them. I know it's humiliating, but this is your dream job we're talking about. There's nothing that's not worth it for that. (OK, that's hyperbole. If I hear about you killing anyone, we never spoke . )
              The High Priest is an Illusion!

              Comment


              • #8
                Smiley, that sucks beyond words, Hon.

                But your mom, your hubby, all of us here agree: YOU DID NOTHING WRONG HERE.

                You did not fail yourself. You worked and struggled to get that degree (think I wasn't following you on FB? I kept up.)

                I know you worked your ass off for that piece of paper. You earned that degree, no doubt. Don't ever say you didn't try - you have been trying and quitters don't quit.

                Get yourself up off that floor, brush the dust off, start looking for another job. In the meantime, some of the others' suggestions about contacting the company for a further explanation (as well as figuring out exactly where and how the fuckup happened) might not be a bad idea - but don't give in to being sucky (you'll lower yourself to those we make fun of here and I know and you know you are way better than that.)

                Also contacting the staffing agency to get clarification might be a good idea as well - be persistent but not pushy.

                Again, in the meantime you and hubby have bills to pay, so a job is a must. Find one that you can get as soon as you can but still put in (check listings online) for job openings in your area in your degree field and start sending out the resumes.

                If you have to apply for assistance, then do it. That's what it's there for - to help those who need it. Pride doesn't fill an empty belly - food does.

                Somewhere, somebody will want to hire you. Why I think that I can't put my finger on, but that's what my inner voice is telling me.

                It just can't piss on the same dog every single day, Smiley. Your day will come, it's just going to take a bit longer than originally anticipated.

                And don't make me have to come all the way from NC to Utah to kick your butt, either.

                Hang in there . . . we're behind you 110%.
                Human Resources - the adult version of "I'm telling Mom." - Agent Anthony "Tony" DiNozzo (NCIS)

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                • #9
                  Oh man, Smiley.... <big hugs> That...just wow. I really want to just knock on the door of the staffing company and....talk to them. I'm so so sorry to hear they did that to you.

                  <hugs> Cheer up, things will get better. Every storm must eventually pass, you'll see. Hang in there, and spit in this day's face and say FORGET YOU I CAN EAT ALL THESE APPLES. And then proceed to make this day feel very, very ashamed of itself.

                  I'll be praying for you.
                  By popular request....I am now officially the Enemy of Normalcy.

                  "What is unobtainium? To Seraph, it's a normal client. :P" -- Observant Friend

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                  • #10
                    Quoth Aethian View Post
                    Did you have the start date in writing?
                    no, not that it matters, it was at will employment, so they could change the terms at any time with or without notice and still legally be fine. Gotta love Utah's employee protection laws (or lack thereof)

                    Quoth auntiem View Post

                    I've lived in Utah and needed assistance - I never got that vibe - the food bank people were esp. nice and understanding, but I didn't grow up in Utah so maybe I missed something - or they realized I recently married a person the same relgion as the food bank and were on their best behavior?
                    my husband had that happen when he applied for food stamps. He had office workers at the DWS ask him if he had gone to any non profits such as churches for assistance, he told them that he had not as he was not a member of any of those churches and was not comfortable going to them when he was not of that faith, they told him "well, maybe if you were part of that church you'd understand your God given duty to support yourself and your family and wouldn't be here", I have friends that work at grocery stores, and the things they say about people who use food stamps behind their backs is appalling, hell, there was even a time that I bought into that culture, and believed that the measure of a good man was how much he helped others, and clearly if you are the one getting help, you aren't of much help to others. I didn't grow up in Utah, but I adapted to that culture quicker than I wish to admit, because it happened to line up with what my father's side of the family was always saying, that there is no greater shame than to admit weakness.

                    Quoth ArcticChicken View Post
                    I know it's humiliating, but this is your dream job we're talking about.
                    it really isn't... it was a dream company, but not my dream job. It was drudge work client services, but the pay was decent enough that I could live with it until I could get my foot far enough in the door to get one of the jobs I really wanted. So dream job may have not been the best choice of words... or maybe it could, because it is the best I could have dreamed of given my circumstances.
                    Besides, they have already told me that they are going to remove the no call no shows from my record and put me on the list for any future training classes, but as of right now they don't have any scheduled. They may not have been able to hire someone else yet, but they always overhire because they know there is going to be turnover, they know there is going to be people who can't pass training, they know that there is people who will be promoted, and it is easier to be temporarily over staffed each training session than to have to hire on demand... I just became that statistic.
                    Last edited by smileyeagle1021; 09-25-2012, 12:26 AM.
                    If you wish to find meaning, listen to the music not the song

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Quoth smileyeagle1021 View Post
                      "well, maybe if you were part of that church you'd understand your God given duty to support yourself and your family and wouldn't be here"
                      See, and this is why I don't carry anything that can be used as a weapon, because I honestly don't know if I could restrain myself from hurting someone I heard say that.

                      Quoth smileyeagle1021 View Post
                      or maybe it could, because it is the best I could have dreamed of given my circumstances.
                      Don't say that. You deserve big, wild, wonderful dreams.

                      Quoth smileyeagle1021 View Post
                      Besides, they have already told me that they are going to remove the no call no shows from my record and put me on the list for any future training classes
                      That's good. At least you know they aren't unreasonable dickheads.

                      I really think it's going to work out for you. I am absolutely convinced something bright and wonderful is going to come along for you.
                      The High Priest is an Illusion!

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                      • #12
                        It was definitely the Staffing agency that did wrong. Yes, you should bring it to them, and the company. More than a few people here have been burned by staffing agencies.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          A quick reminder, folks: This is not Fratching. Please don't fratch here. We're toeing the line pretty hard.

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                          • #14
                            A quick updated thought on this, as was pointed out to me, what does it say about the job if it is so common for people not to show up their first week that no one at the job site thought to call the staffing agency.
                            If you wish to find meaning, listen to the music not the song

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Well...just another reason to never deal with staffing agencies. As if I needed it anyway.

                              You got hosed as badly as the Packers did last night. Even more so, since this is money and livelihoods we're talking about, not a child's game.
                              Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

                              "I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily

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