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iradney 01-09-2007 10:54 AM

Three old ladies sitting on a bench in a park. Suddenly, a young man rushes up to them and flashes them! The first old lady has a stroke! The second old lady has a stroke! The third old lady can't reach... ;)

MadMike 01-09-2007 06:45 PM

Three hard-of-hearing old ladies are sitting on a park bench.

"Windy, isn't it?" asks the first.

"No, it's Thursday!" answers the second.

"Me too," says the third, "Let's go get a drink!"

Irving Patrick Freleigh 01-09-2007 07:32 PM

My groaner for the day....

You have two potatoes. How do you tell which one is the prostitute?

You look for the label that says "Idaho"!

DarthRetard 01-11-2007 04:19 AM

The credit for this one goes to monty python......

What's brown and like a bell?


Irving Patrick Freleigh 01-13-2007 01:18 AM

Anybody hear the latest joke for psychics?


Okay! Here it is:

BlaqueKatt 01-16-2007 03:58 AM

I had to name my pet pig Ink-

He kept running out of his pen

Irving Patrick Freleigh 01-16-2007 07:57 PM

Oh yeah?!

My parents bought me a dog for protection once. He was a wonderful dog. One time when I got held up, he sat and watched. He was a watchdog.

Most people name their dogs something "Fido" or "Rover". I named my dog "sex".

One day I took Sex for a walk, and he ran away from me. I spent all day looking for him. A cop came up to me and asked me "What are you doing in this alley at 3:00 in the morning?"

I told him "I'm looking for Sex". That wasn't much fun to explain to the judge.

One day I went to get a license for my dog. I told the clerk "I'd like to get a license for Sex." He said, "I'd like to have one too!"

Then I told him "But this is the dog!" The clerk told me he didn't care how she looked.

I then said "But I've had Sex since I was three years old!"

When I got divorced from my wife, we went to court for custody of the dog. I told the Judge, "Your Honor, I had Sex before we were married!" He said "So did I!"

I then told him that after we married, Sex left me. He said "Me too!"

When I told him I once had Sex on TV, he said "Show-off!" I them told the Judge it was a contest, and he said I should have sold tickets.

I also told the judge that when we got married, on our honeymoon I told the hotel clerk I wanted a room for my wife, and a special room for Sex. He told me "All our rooms are for sex!"

"But you don't understand!" I said to the clerk. "Sex keeps me awake at night!" He said "Me too!"

I give up.

Broomjockey 01-17-2007 06:13 AM

Did you hear about the two guys who robbed the calendar factory?

They each got six months!

Sphinx 01-17-2007 01:49 PM

:roll: Omg am I wrong for loving these kind of jokes??:lol:

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