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Your All-Time Favorite Quotes!

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  • Simon: Gentlemen, I'd like you to meet your captain, Captain Oveur.
    Clarence Oveur: Gentlemen, welcome aboard.
    Simon: Captain, your navigator, Mr. Unger, and your first officer, Mr. Dunn.
    Clarence Oveur: Unger.
    Unger: Oveur.
    Dunn: Oveur.
    Clarence Oveur: Dunn. Gentlemen, let's get to work.
    Simon: Unger, didn't you serve under Oveur in the Air Force?
    Unger: Not directly. Technically, Dunn was under Oveur and I was under Dunn.
    Dunn: Yep.
    Simon: So, Dunn, you were under Oveur and over Unger.
    Unger: Yep.
    Clarence Oveur: That's right. Dunn was over Unger and I was over Dunn.
    Unger: So, you see, both Dunn and I were under Oveur, even though I was under Dunn.
    Clarence Oveur: Dunn was over Unger, and I was over Dunn.

    From Airplane II - the sequel



    Dark Helmet: Before you die there is something you should know about us, Lone Star.
    Lone Starr: What?
    Dark Helmet: I am your father's brother's nephew's cousin's former roommate.
    Lone Starr: What's that make us?
    Dark Helmet: Absolutely nothing! Which is what you are about to become.


    Dark Helmet: Who is he?
    Colonel Sandurz: He's an asshole sir.
    Dark Helmet: I know that! What's his name?
    Colonel Sandurz: That is his name sir. Asshole, Major Asshole!
    Dark Helmet: And his cousin?
    Colonel Sandurz: He's an asshole too sir. Gunner's mate First Class Philip Asshole!
    Dark Helmet: How many asholes do we have on this ship, anyway?
    [Entire bridge crew stands up and raises a hand]
    Entire Bridge Crew: Yo!
    Dark Helmet: I knew it. I'm surrounded by assholes!

    From Spaceballs

    (quotes taken from IMDB)

    Comment


    • There is no other species on the Earth that does science. It is, so far, entirely a human invention, evolved by natural selection in the cerebral cortex for one simple reason: it works. It is not perfect. It can be misused. It is only a tool. But it is by far the best tool we have, self-correcting, ongoing, applicable to everything. It has two rules. First: there are no sacred truths; all assumptions must be critically examined; arguments from authority are worthless. Second: whatever is inconsistent with the facts must be discarded or revised. We must understand the Cosmos as it is and not confuse how it is with how we wish it to be.
      -- Carl Sagan, Cosmos
      "I look at the stars. It's a clear night and the Milky Way seems so near. That's where I'll be going soon. "We are all star stuff." I suddenly remember Delenn's line from Joe's script. Not a bad prospect. I am not afraid. In the meantime, let me close my eyes and sense the beauty around me. And take that breath under the dark sky full of stars. Breathe in. Breathe out. That's all."
      -Mira Furlan

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      • England is not a part of Europe, Rebecca! We tolerate it, like a person tolerates herpes! ~ Assassins Creed: Brotherhood

        The historian guy...i don't remember his name.
        I can only please one person a day, today isn't your day, and tomorrow doesn't look good either.

        When someone asks you a stupid question, give them a stupid answer.

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        • That would be Shaun.

          Here's another one from Assassin's Creed II & Brotherhood:

          [on seeing Ezio freerun/climb]
          Man 1: He must be late.
          Man 2: She must be beautiful.
          "I look at the stars. It's a clear night and the Milky Way seems so near. That's where I'll be going soon. "We are all star stuff." I suddenly remember Delenn's line from Joe's script. Not a bad prospect. I am not afraid. In the meantime, let me close my eyes and sense the beauty around me. And take that breath under the dark sky full of stars. Breathe in. Breathe out. That's all."
          -Mira Furlan

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          • If there is one thing I learned from James T. Kirk, it was that having sex with aliens is the best way to make friends.

            (I don't know the name of the person who said that. It was a comment on a website discussion about the deleted sex scene from the movie Avatar.)
            When you start at zero, everything's progress.

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            • "'Speak the oath'... 'cuz everybody knows the oath...
              Holds power ring up to face of power battery
              I, Hal Jordan, do solemnly swear...
              to pledge allegiance...
              to a lantern...
              that I got from a dying, purple alien...
              in a swamp..."

              --Hal Jordan's (Ryan Reynolds) first attempt to speak the Green Lantern Corps Oath, from Green Lantern (2011)

              Last edited by Jack T. Chance; 08-14-2011, 03:57 PM.
              "Eventually one outgrows the fairy tales of childhood, belief in Santa and the Easter Bunny, and believing that SCs are even capable of imagining themselves in our position."
              --StanFlouride

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              • "You should be kissed. And often. And by somebody who knows how." Rhett Butler to Scarlett O'Hara in "Gone With The Wind".
                "Imagine that. Human souls, trapped like flies in the World Wide Web, stuck forever, crying out for help."-The Doctor
                "Isn't that basically Twitter?"-Clara

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                • Favorite Blackadder quote: “This is a crisis. A large crisis. In fact, if you got a moment, it's a twelve-story crisis with a magnificent entrance hall, carpeting throughout, 24-hour portage, and an enormous sign on the roof, saying 'This Is a Large Crisis'. A large crisis requires a large plan. Get me two pencils and a pair of underpants.”

                  Other favorites:

                  "You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than dreaming" ~ Dr.Seuss

                  "Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid." ~ Albert Einstein

                  "There are no elevators to success - you have to take the stairs." ~ Unknown

                  "You cannot change the cards you're dealt, just how you play the hand" ~ Randy Pausch

                  "Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea." ~ Robert A. Heinlein

                  "We do not believe in ourselves until someone reveals that deep inside us is valuable, worth listening to, worthy of our trust, sacred to our touch. Once we believe in ourselves we can risk curiosity, wonder, spontaneous delight or any experience that reveals the human spirit. "~ e.e. cummings

                  "Those who do not have power over the story that dominates their lives, power to retell it, rethink it, deconstruct it, joke about it, and change it as times change, truly are powerless, because they cannot think new thoughts." ~ Salman Rushdie, "One Thousand Days in a Balloon", New York Times, December 12, 1991
                  The large print giveth, and the small print taketh away.

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                  • "Cry havoc, and let slip the dogs of war" - Shakespeare, most notably in the play Julius Caesar..spoken by Antony.

                    There are many other great quotes I like, but this is probably my favorite.
                    Engaged to the amazing Marmalady. She is my Silver Dragon, shining as bright as the sun. I her Black Dragon (though good honestly), dark as night..fierce and strong.

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                    • Daemonmonkey--love the Spaceballs quotes! My favorite is, "One, two, three, four, five?? That's the combination an idiot would have on his luggage!" Well, I could quote the entire movie--so many funny ones.

                      OK, mine:

                      "Dogs have owners. Cats have staff."

                      My mom will sometimes refer to something as "uglier than homemade sin."

                      My friend: "People have turned the simple act of goods exchange into an exercise in personal validation and species hierarchy competition."
                      "Is it hot in here to you? It's very warm, isn't it?"--Nero, probably

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                      • Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint. - Mark Twain
                        I don't go in for ancient wisdom
                        I don't believe just 'cause ideas are tenacious
                        It means that they're worthy - Tim Minchin, "White Wine in the Sun"

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                        • Forgot one of my own: "Sometimes you have to let your inner child out. Just don't let him run into the street!"
                          "Is it hot in here to you? It's very warm, isn't it?"--Nero, probably

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                          • "Put. The bunny. Back. In the box."~ Cameron Poe(Nicolas Cage) in "Con Air".
                            "Imagine that. Human souls, trapped like flies in the World Wide Web, stuck forever, crying out for help."-The Doctor
                            "Isn't that basically Twitter?"-Clara

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                            • A rose by any other name would smell as sweet. But you call it a s___blossom, and I doubt most people would ever go near it to find out.
                              Something kind of sad about the way that things have come to be.
                              Desensitized to everything, what became of subtlety?

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                              • "When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade. Make life take back the lemons back! Get mad! I don't want your damn lemons! What am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life's manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I'm the man who's gonna burn your house down! WITH THE LEMONS! I'm gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that BURNS YOUR HOUSE DOWN!"

                                "BURN HIS HOUSE DOWN! Burning people! He says what we're all thinking!"
                                PWNADE(TM) - Serve up a glass today! | PWNZER - An act of pwnage so awesome, it's like the victim got hit by a tank.

                                There are only Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse because I choose to walk!

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