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Things I am not allowed to do at work.

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  • When someone asks if anyone needs to use the vacuum cleaner, I'm not allowed to say, "Sure, I could use a little sucky sucky."
    This site proves Corey Taylor right. Man really is a "four letter word."

    I'm now using my Deviant Art page to post my humor.

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    • Quoth catcul View Post
      When someone asks if anyone needs to use the vacuum cleaner, I'm not allowed to say, "Sure, I could use a little sucky sucky."
      Did Kit hack your account?
      My son thinks I'm Lucifer Morningstar. I'm not sure he's wrong.

      Comment


      • Quoth YamiNoHime View Post
        Did Kit hack your account?
        Doesn't this site have enough room for two perverts?
        This site proves Corey Taylor right. Man really is a "four letter word."

        I'm now using my Deviant Art page to post my humor.

        Comment


        • Quoth catcul View Post
          Doesn't this site have enough room for two perverts?
          Are we down to two?
          "I don't have to be petty. The Universe does that for me."

          Comment


          • Quoth Ironclad Alibi View Post
            Are we down to two?
            I'm sure we have more, but Kit-Ginevra and I are the most active ones AFAIK.
            This site proves Corey Taylor right. Man really is a "four letter word."

            I'm now using my Deviant Art page to post my humor.

            Comment


            • Quoth catcul View Post
              I'm sure we have more, but Kit-Ginevra and I are the most active ones AFAIK.
              Trust me, you two are not the only ones.
              Don’t worry about what I’m up to. Worry about why you are worried about what I’m up to.

              Comment


              • Quoth AkaiKitsune View Post
                Trust me, you two are not the only ones.
                Quoth AkaiKitsune View Post
                The pants are not “optional”
                I see what you mean. It's too bad I'm not allowed to ask for pictures while on the job.
                This site proves Corey Taylor right. Man really is a "four letter word."

                I'm now using my Deviant Art page to post my humor.

                Comment


                • I'm not allowed to grab people by the back of the head and yell, "WHAT THE F DOES THE FEN SIGN SAY, AHOLE?!?!"
                  This site proves Corey Taylor right. Man really is a "four letter word."

                  I'm now using my Deviant Art page to post my humor.

                  Comment


                  • On days like that, I refer to my family mantra, "Limited Bail Money"
                    My son thinks I'm Lucifer Morningstar. I'm not sure he's wrong.

                    Comment


                    • Despite the fact that he collects naughty people using steel restraints, I'm not allowed to call a member of law enforcement "Officer Krampus."
                      This site proves Corey Taylor right. Man really is a "four letter word."

                      I'm now using my Deviant Art page to post my humor.

                      Comment


                      • Tell people "have a nice day," not "enjoy your next 24 hours."

                        Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

                        "I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily

                        Comment


                        • Quoth catcul View Post
                          Despite the fact that he collects naughty people using steel restraints, I'm not allowed to call a member of law enforcement "Officer Krampus."
                          How about Office Krupke?
                          My son thinks I'm Lucifer Morningstar. I'm not sure he's wrong.

                          Comment


                          • Quoth YamiNoHime View Post
                            How about Office Krupke?
                            It's better than calling him Barney Fife.
                            This site proves Corey Taylor right. Man really is a "four letter word."

                            I'm now using my Deviant Art page to post my humor.

                            Comment


                            • Quoth Irving Patrick Freleigh View Post
                              Tell people "have a nice day," not "enjoy your next 24 hours."

                              But doesn’t “have a nice DAY” imply that you hope they get what they deserve come nightfall? So doesn’t that fit customer service much better?

                              The grinch is not the Christmas mascot. I am not allowed to use the old cutouts from a previous Christmas Champaign to make it look like the grinch is peeping into anywhere. No adding a Santa hat does not excuse the grinch left in the bathroom.

                              I am not allowed to put the elf on a shelf in positions that “compromise store integrity” even if they are only in places the staff go and everyone else thinks it’s funny.
                              Don’t worry about what I’m up to. Worry about why you are worried about what I’m up to.

                              Comment


                              • Quoth catcul View Post
                                I'm not allowed to grab people by the back of the head and yell, "WHAT THE F DOES THE FEN SIGN SAY, AHOLE?!?!"
                                Which could also be reworded to “I must not actualize my fantasies on staff or customers.” To be fair upper management doesn’t have the brain cells to spare and you can’t harm what isn’t there in the customers.
                                Last edited by AkaiKitsune; 11-11-2019, 11:07 PM. Reason: I apparently can’t spell worth shit
                                Don’t worry about what I’m up to. Worry about why you are worried about what I’m up to.

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