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  • Family for the holidays :(

    I work part time, go to school full time. It is one of those crunch weeks where a lot needs to be done before I get a 2 day break over which, I still have to work, and have to do homework. Did I work on all the things I need to get done over the last few days? No. I have been cleaning because my future sister-in-law and brother-in-law invited themselves for thanksgiving. It pisses me off. Every ime she visits she makes comments about how I should clean more since I "only" work part time.
    Anyway today the vacuum cleaner exploded. BF forgot to clean out the filter like I asked. So lovely. SIL BIL and BF called me to see how I was doing and thought it was hilarious. It makes me so angry. I have 5 deadlines in the next 10 days and laughing because I had to take 2 hours to clean up after the vacuum exploded isn't going to make hate me happy to see you. I feel silly taking the time to post this but I really need to vent.

    I really want to tell them all off, pack up and leave. If it wouldn't be a massive drive to make my work and classes for the next week I would just go to my parents house for the week. I cannot believe how selfish and inconsiderate they are being. I try and think about the people who stay with when I stay over at a friend or relatives house. I'm being evicted from my bedroom and my workroom. I really don't want to be evicted from my home.

  • #2
    If she finds your housekeeping so substandard then she can find herself a nice hotel to stay at. Who the hell incites themselves to be a guest at someone else's home - especially during the holidays?!?!

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    • #3
      How terrible of your future in-laws, and of your boyfriend. One of them must be his sibling, yes? Why didn't he put his foot down when they invited themselves over?

      If it were me, I would call the in-laws and tell them they cannot come, you don't have time to have them over, and that they are very inconsiderate to invite themselves. Seriously, how did that happen? How does stuff like that go down? I just can't imagine people being so rude.

      It sounds like you may also have to have a sit-down with your boyfriend and tell him how you're feeling. Does he know how stressed out you are? Sometimes my husband is totally oblivious to how stressed or upset I am about something, even if I think it's obvious, and once I tell him why I'm stressed/upset, he makes moves to help or fix the situation.

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      • #4
        He won't, he adores his sister and can't see what could possibly be annoying about the whole situation. He was so happy they are coming. I cannot understand why they are coming. He goes HOME to his mother's house EVERY Christmas. I work a stupid retail job so I can't go but they have him EVERY Christmas. Isn't that enough? I am on the verge of tears. He also work out of town almost ever week and is only home on weekends so he blames me for any messiness of the house. I am so fed up.

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        • #5
          Time to have a long talk with your boyfriend. The situation you described can't continue.
          "Life is tough. It's even tougher if you're stupid" Redd Foxx as Al Royal - The Royal Family - Pilot Episode - 1991.

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          • #6
            Quoth Aislin View Post
            I work part time, go to school full time. It is one of those crunch weeks where a lot needs to be done before I get a 2 day break over which, I still have to work, and have to do homework. Did I work on all the things I need to get done over the last few days? No. I have been cleaning because my future sister-in-law and brother-in-law invited themselves for thanksgiving. It pisses me off. Every ime she visits she makes comments about how I should clean more since I "only" work part time.
            Check out the story and comments here: http://www.fark.com/comments/6751471...voting-enabled
            They might give you some ideas...

            I'd recommend you leave the place a mess and have a Thanksgiving dinner of KFC and Doritos. "Oopsie! I guess I should clean more, since I only work part time!" Yeah, your SO may get pissed, but he'll get over it. Your in-laws never will.

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            • #7
              Quoth Aislin View Post
              I have been cleaning because my future sister-in-law and brother-in-law invited themselves for thanksgiving.
              They invited themselves?!

              No. Just NO. You never invite yourself anywhere; you call and ask the person if you can come by and visit. If the answer is, "sorry, I can't," you accept that. I'm no Miss Manners, but even I know that inviting yourself over is extremely rude. Imposing yourself on someone else and mocking their cleaning skills goes beyond extremely rude. Where the hell did these two learn manners?!
              Quoth MaggieTheCat View Post
              If it were me, I would call the in-laws and tell them they cannot come, you don't have time to have them over, and that they are very inconsiderate to invite themselves.

              Quoth MaggieTheCat View Post
              It sounds like you may also have to have a sit-down with your boyfriend and tell him how you're feeling.
              It wouldn't hurt, but if he was raised in the same household as those two rude gits, he might not comprehend that what they are doing is wrong, and think the OP is making a big fuss over nothing.
              I don't have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem.
              My LiveJournal
              A page we can all agree with!

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              • #8
                I presume that because the boyfriend is always so happy to see the future in-laws, they assume they have a permenant invite because he will just LOVE to see them! Aislin's feelings aren't important - BF certainly doesn't seem to be paying much attention to them.

                I second (third? fourth? fifth?) the comments above - have a talk with the BF. If it was my husband, he would be getting a very detailed explanation and a mandatory "what are we doing about this situation?" discussion, but then I don't deal well with study deadline stress.

                Also, re going to your parents - I honestly think it would be a good move at any time. You'd get peace, you wouldn't be complained at by your BF, and it might take some of the stress off you. Eviction is if your BF/in-laws throw you out - if you leave by choice, it's your action and you then control that.
                I speak English, L33t, Sarcasm and basic Idiot.

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                • #9
                  I'm being evicted from my bedroom and my workroom.
                  W.T.F.?

                  If - IF - you and your boyfriend have an agreement that your workroom doubles as the guest bedroom, I can see you being evicted from it for the duration of the stay.

                  But guests NEVER get MY bed. And should never expect to. They're coming to my house, they can couch-surf. I'm not rich enough to have a 'guest bedroom'.
                  Seshat's self-help guide:
                  1. Would you rather be right, or get the result you want?
                  2. If you're consistently getting results you don't want, change what you do.
                  3. Deal with the situation you have now, however it occurred.
                  4. Accept the consequences of your decisions.

                  "All I want is a pretty girl, a decent meal, and the right to shoot lightning at fools." - Anders, Dragon Age.

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                  • #10
                    What.The.Hell. That's just incredibly rude of them to invite themselves to your house, hijack your bedroom and have the audacity to mock you and your home. It's time to have a talk with BF about that. Sorry but NOBODY but me and my SO get to sleep in our bedroom. Either it's the futon or the hotel for the guests.
                    I don't get paid enough to kiss your a**! -Groezig 5/31/08
                    Another day...another million braincells lost...-Sarlon 6/16/08
                    Chivalry is not dead. It's just direly underappreciated. -Samaliel 9/15/09

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