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  • The Dumbest Joke I've Heard In a Long Time

    Q: What's blue and smells like red paint?

    A: Blue paint.

    I don't know why, but it cracks me up.

  • #2
    *giggles madly*

    I love it. Imma tell EVERYONE.

    Comment


    • #3
      What's yellow and knocks down walls?

      A bulldozer.

      Comment


      • #4
        Quoth hecubus View Post

        I don't know why, but it cracks me up.
        I told it to my mom. I laughed. She looked at me like I'm crazy.
        I don't go in for ancient wisdom
        I don't believe just 'cause ideas are tenacious
        It means that they're worthy - Tim Minchin, "White Wine in the Sun"

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        • #5
          One in a similar vein that we used to tell all the time in kindergarten...

          What's green and looks like a bucket?

          A green bucket!

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          • #6
            What can you sit on, brush your teeth with and fly in?


            a chair, a toothbrush and a plane.
            "All I've ever learned from love was how to shoot somebody who out-drew ya"

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            • #7
              A neutron walks into a bar and asks the bartender "How much are drinks in here?"

              Bartender replies "For you, no charge."
              Ba'al: I'm a god. Gods are all-knowing.

              http://unrelatedcaptions.com/45147

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              • #8
                An atom walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, little guy, why are you so sad?"

                Atom says, "I lost an electron."

                Bartender says, "Are you sure?"

                Atom: "Yes. I'm positive."
                My basic dog food advice - send a pm if you need more.

                Saydrah's leaving the nest advice + packing list live here.

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                • #9
                  Quoth Saydrah View Post
                  An atom walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, little guy, why are you so sad?"

                  Atom says, "I lost an electron."

                  Bartender says, "Are you sure?"

                  Atom: "Yes. I'm positive."
                  .............................my old AP Chem teacher would have loved you. He loved chem jokes!
                  I am Wolverine.............and Wolverine does not do high kicks.

                  He was a hero to me....and heroes are not supposed to die.

                  Oh good, my dog found the chainsaw!

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                  • #10
                    Quoth hecubus View Post
                    Q: What's blue and smells like red paint?

                    A: Blue paint.
                    It's not paint; it's makeup!
                    "For the love of all that is holy and 4 things that aren’t but feel pretty good anyway" ~ Gravekeeper

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                    • #11
                      What's red and goes "ding dong"?
                      A red ding dong.
                      What's blue and goes "ding dong"?
                      A blue ding dong.
                      What's yellow and goes "ding dong"?
                      A yellow ding dong.
                      What's green and goes "ding dong"?
                      A green ding dong, right?
                      Nope, they don't come in green.
                      "We were put on this Earth to fart around, and don't let anyone ever tell you otherwise." -Kurt Vonnegut

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                      • #12
                        How do you shoot a blue elephant?
                        With a blue elephant gun.

                        How do you shoot a red elephant?
                        With a red elephant gun.

                        How do you shoot a green elephant?
                        Paint it red, and shoot it with a red elephant gun.



                        What's brown and sticky?

                        A stick
                        When I said "From my research", what I actually meant to say was "Made shit up" - from a thottbot thread

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                        • #13
                          here's some from when I was a kid...

                          What's big, green and goes "slam, slam, slam, slam"?
                          A 4-door dinosaur.

                          What time is it when a brontosaurus steps on your fence?
                          Time to get a new fence.

                          Why did the elephant cross the road?
                          Because the chicken retired, duh.
                          (alt. Cause he was stapled to the chicken.)

                          If Jack helped you off your horse, would you help Jack off his?

                          How do you stop a Triceratops from charging?
                          Take away his credit cards!


                          And one that my CW Mac thought up...

                          What happens when you stick a lollipop to a rooster?
                          You get a cocksucker.

                          "FUCK NO I DON'T WANT YOUR FREAKY ALIEN MOTHERSHIP ORANGES. " - Cookiesaur
                          ~~

                          Munkie's NaNo WC: 9648

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                          • #14
                            What's red and invisible?




                            NO TOMATOES!!!

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                            • #15
                              What's green and has wheels?

                              Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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