The Tow Files - 2018 Wrap Up Edition

[Argus]

Quoth Argabarga

I tried finding Mr. Grounded's YouTube channel so I could link you all to the video he surely uploaded,

On the off-chance that this video does eventually turn up, is F.A.'s tablet video in a form that can be easily uploaded as a reply?

[Smapti]

Quoth Argabarga

Hmmm, that’s odd, last time I checked in a tow truck, a balaclava and pillowcase full of doorknobs wasn’t on the equipment sheet, so I find a claim we shook down your progeny for cash a little dubious, perhaps you’d like to give us some more information, so we can further research this?

So, Argabarga, how do you explain the fact that since you started doing tows, petty crimes such as parking violations are down 80%, while heavy sack beatings up are up a shocking 900%?

[MoonCat]

R2-Detour

The guy who came right back to the SAME LOT HE GOT TOWED FROM as soon as he picked up his car....WTF, dude?? I hope he doesn't reproduce because that is some A-level stupid right there.

[Argabarga]

Quoth Smapti

So, Argabarga, how do you explain the fact that since you started doing tows, petty crimes such as parking violations are down 80%, while heavy sack beatings up are up a shocking 900%?

"Well, I'm not going to lie and say we aren't possibly investing in other revenue streams as of late"

[morgana]

Quoth Argabarga

R2-DETOUR

This whole post had me giggling, but THAT is what made me fall off my chair.

[Naaman]

Quoth Argabarga

What followed was, what could only be entitled “Incoherence” It was a disjointed tirade about how we were liars, we’d be sorry, we can’t prove that picture isn’t altered, he was a 9th level ninja-lawyer with a high +12 barratry skill and a vice-partner in some law firm and we’ll be seeing him in court and, oh, mustn’t forget this, f*ck us, f*uck our police report, f*uck us, f*ck our company and f*uck us some more.

Beantown counter-counter-replied with another email informing our lawyer friend that his last communication with us seemed to be a bit hard to figure out. He could try mailing us again, if he’d like to continue to press the matter, but also that any and all future emails would be forwarded to both or company attorney and the state Bar Association if we continued to have trouble deciphering what he was trying to say in between those copious amounts of “F*ck You”

It would have been awesom e if he'd used one of the classic replies*;

"Attached is a letter that we received on November 19, 1974. I feel that you should be aware that some asshole is signing your name to stupid letters. "


*The other classic, of course, being Arkell V Pressdram

[CrazedClerkthe2nd]

Love me some tow files!

That daddys girl that kept telling you to take the ticket back was funny as hell. You'd think at some point she'd realize it's cheaper to park a little further away and walk rather than keep eating the tow fees.

Also:

"scofflaw assistance hotline"

That is brilliant and I am so stealing it.

[RealUnimportant]

Quoth Argabarga

we would have the bejeezus sued out of us so hard that we'd have to go looking for a compatible donor bejeezus and he'd sue THAT one out of us as well.

In a sea of quotability, this, THIS is ... *chef's airkiss*

[Jetfire]

Love the stories, and now I have a tow story of my own to share.

I am the president of the condo corporation I live in. Since I live in the Canadian Maritimes, Mother Nature likes to periodically dump lots of frozen water on us. Frozen water that has to be moved around the parking lot so people can get their cars in and out.

We have a contract with a plowing company and have let all the owners know what to expect. During a storm, the plows come out every so often to clear the driveways. And 11:30 am the day after a storm, they will come back and do a full lot clearing.

To keep things simple, we have a rule at the complex; when the plows come for the 11:30 full lot clearing, all vehicles MUST be off the lot so they can have room to do their job. And generally speaking, most people do that without a problem.

Of course, some of the units are rented out to tenants. And for whatever reason, the owner has not let the board know who lives in those units, so we don't have them on our email notice list. A notice list where I've regularly sent out storm warnings and heads up about upcoming plowing, as well as reminders of the plowing schedule.

So that setup done, just after Christmas, Mother Nature dumped 6-10cm of snow on us. So despite the holidays, we had to get the lot cleared and did so. There was one car parked in a corner spot somewhat out of the way, but we were generous and let it be.

A few days go by, the car is still untouched. I send out a notice asking if anyone knows who owns the car. Forecast says another 10cm of snow is coming New Years Day, meaning another full plowing on Jan 2nd (thank goodness it wasn't on Jan 1st; I'd probably just say 'screw it' on that day). I sent a warning that the car would be towed if it wasn't moved by then.

New Years comes, we get the snow. Jan 2nd shows up, the car is still untouched, so we call our local towers before the plows come. Truck comes up, pulls it out with no issue by 10, plows show up at 11 and all is good. (okay we have 2 cars left behind; one with a dead battery and missing keys despite the owners best efforts, the other a truck that was left just for that storm so I let it be for a change). The truck owner did contact me later on and say they were on the way back but were a few hours outside the city. Way too late by then if I had been feeling nasty, but in the end no issues there.

By early afternoon, we start getting the calls and emails from the car owners, about how it's unfair that they can't leave their car in an isolated corner of the lot, and what are people supposed to do if they're away on vacation or on leave, etc....

Thank goodness for Google Groups. I'm able to forward links to the group emails saying "Well here's where we tried to find the owner. Here's the notice about the upcoming storm, and the plowing. Here's one of the many emails I sent outlining the plowing policy. As we did not know who you were, did your landlord not send you these?"

We did get another email about it not being fair and all that, but it wasn't worth responding to, and as they are tenants not owners, it is purely a tenant-owner issue in the end.

And now Mother Nature has another 30cm of snow coming our way for Wednesday. Gonna be a fun week.

[earl colby pottinger]

They complained about being towed, then don't do it.

On the other hand the snow has to go somewhere, I think I know where to dump the snow after clearing the rest of the parking lot.