The tale of Psycho B@*%h

[FormerCallingCardRep]

I am so excited. I have my first truly sucky customer story.

A little background first though. For a couple of years my company applied Polyurethane Foam roofs with a Polyurea top coat to protect the foam. This was done to provide insulation and seal the roof.. We have quit putting these roofs on due to issues we were starting t see, but we still honor the warranties on the 157 roofs that we did in which the warranty has not expired. This is the important point. End of background

Back in December we got a letter from a woman demanding that we pay her $6,000,00 to have her roof redone since her roof was "still under warranty and had failed". In looking up her information we discovered that her warranty had expired in October of 2010. We notified her that her roof was not under warranty and that we would not be sending her money to put a new roof on her house. She then sent a second letter in January stating, and I quote, " To avoid the following I expect a check for $6,000 OR I will sue you w/the above mentioned original installers testifying on my behalf for the $10K plus, blacklist you on Angie's list, Google Review, both the M and the P Chamber of Commerce/Better Business Bureau. I will blog your company on any site that could possibly provide you with business. And I will start the drama machine which you well know thrives on this sort of situation."

She is claiming she paid $10K for the job when in fact she paid $7,400. We went up in 2007 (two years before the original warranty expired) and fixed a small crack that had developed and left her with extra caulking at her request. We also went back up in 2008 (one year before expiration of original warranty) recoated the roof and extended her warranty by one year as a courtesy.

Today, I came into the office to a letter from the Better Business Bureau. I have been working off and on all day getting things together to answer her complaint.

Oh, and the name above for her, came from one of my bosses at after lunch when we were discussing her.

[Kheldarson]

So...basically..."Pay me for a new roof or I'll tell everyone how bad you are, even though I'm lying"?

Did somebody not progress beyond toddler-hood?

[KhirasHY]

I'm starting to wonder if Psycho Bitch isn't becoming some kind of whacked out lesser deity in our modern age. Psycho Bitch, when chosen as a deity, provides a penalty of -8 to Charisma and -6 to Intelligence, but automatically grants the feats "Hosebeast" and "Rage of the Incompetent." Followers of Psycho Bitch suffer a permanent penalty to stealth, as their every interaction with others must be performed at a screaming pitch; this provides a slight bonus to intimidation. The alignment of Psycho Bitch, and her followers, is generally Chaotic Evil in most game settings.

Note that, in the Retail Hell campaign setting, Psycho Bitch may be used as a final boss, wherein she can be slain by using the legendary weapons Reason and Common Sense, but only if her outer defenses are previously dissolved by use of Disintegrate or a similar quality spell/tool.

/Yeah, I just nerded out there
//So what!?

[Ben_Who]

Psycho Bitch, when chosen as a deity, provides a penalty of -8 to Charisma and -6 to Intelligence, but automatically grants the feats "Hosebeast" and "Rage of the Incompetent." Followers of Psycho Bitch suffer a permanent penalty to stealth, as their every interaction with others must be performed at a screaming pitch; this provides a slight bonus to intimidation. The alignment of Psycho Bitch, and her followers, is generally Chaotic Evil in most game settings.

Note that, in the Retail Hell campaign setting, Psycho Bitch may be used as a final boss, wherein she can be slain by using the legendary weapons Reason and Common Sense, but only if her outer defenses are previously dissolved by use of Disintegrate or a similar quality spell/tool.

/Yeah, I just nerded out there
//So what!?

Well, I'm more of an MMORPG player, and I don't really see Psycho Bitch as a final boss; s/he's more along the lines of a first or second dungeon or raid boss. One of the low-level ones, easily tanked but capable of considerable damage if not put down quickly. Among her abilities are Lawsuit Threat, which is likely to cast "fear" on lower-level tank-managers, causing them to cast "capitulate" in an attempt to reduce the degree of threat - and depending on whether the tank is using customized or standardized Manager-Weapons. Customized high level manager-weapons include Shop Ownership, Strong Policy, and Trespass, each of which has the ability to defeat Psycho Bitch in less than three melee attacks.

Secondary or phased attacks by Psycho Bitch include Rude Letter, which she may use long after her perceived defeat to devastate the DPS. Attacks such as News Media and Lawsuit Threat aren't as powerful as Psycho Bitch believes them to be. A weak tank, however, will allow Psycho Bitch to do tremendous damage to DPS and support characters, and may even wipe the party.

(I just let my WoW subscription lapse. I don't actually miss it all that much.)

[shopgirl15]

I'd love to see this one play out.

[emax4]

I'm starting to wonder if Psycho Bitch isn't becoming some kind of whacked out lesser deity in our modern age. Psycho Bitch, when chosen as a deity, provides a penalty of -8 to Charisma and -6 to Intelligence, but automatically grants the feats "Hosebeast" and "Rage of the Incompetent." Followers of Psycho Bitch suffer a permanent penalty to stealth, as their every interaction with others must be performed at a screaming pitch; this provides a slight bonus to intimidation. The alignment of Psycho Bitch, and her followers, is generally Chaotic Evil in most game settings.

I just rolled a d20 Saving Throw vs. Stupidity and avoided her. The invisible cloak came in handy!

I love the line "Pay me for a new roof or I'll tell everyone how bad you are, even though I'm lying.". That would have been one of my replies, along with, "okay, you'll be famous on clientsfromhell.net and customerssuck.com"

[dbuzman]

The way she phrased the letter may constitute blackmail. I'd ask someone in the legal profession and if it does press charges.

[Dips]

The way she phrased the letter may constitute blackmail. I'd ask someone in the legal profession and if it does press charges.

I agree. Sounds like attempted extortion to me. And she put it in writing too!

[FormerCallingCardRep]

I had the same feeling when I read it. She was even dumb enough to put it in her complaint to the BBB. I have our reply composed, just waiting to sit down with the bosses to go over it and see what revisions they want to make. This feels like it is going to be epic. The big boss told me yesterday that if this does end up going to court that he is going to depend on me.

[PepperElf]

I would also consider combing the complaint sites to see if she really does start libeling you.

you can always use that as evidence, especially if she puts lies in it

[gbsi]

Stats, Damn Stats, and Lies

One in four individuals has a mental disorder of one kind or another. Half of the population is below average intelligence (by definition). One in eight is naturally belligerent. Therefore, with an even distribution of the first and third, eleven sixteenths of the population has potential to cause problems on a regular basis. More than two thirds. So if you're in a group of three...
Please let me know if this post makes you disoriented, confused or angry. Thank you.

[EricKei]

At the very least -- forward her email to the BBB and anywhere else that seems to have gotten wind of this, wherein she openly admits in writing that she intends to commit fraud against you. Include the info about the follow-up visits, as well.

That, and go ahead and see if you can get your company to lawyer up now, before it gets too huge. Best to let them handle it, and redirect ALL communication attempts with her to the legal team (just say "Our attorneys have requested that they be the ones to communicate with you directly, and we are not permitted to comment on this situation at all at our level")

[Brojekk]

/Yeah, I just nerded out there
//So what!?

I like...no..love the way you think Khiras

Well, I'm more of an MMORPG player, and I don't really see Psycho Bitch as a final boss; s/he's more along the lines of a first or second dungeon or raid boss.

Just like with Khiras...I love they way you put things.

[Alpha Strike]

...Note that, in the Retail Hell campaign setting, Psycho Bitch may be used as a final boss, wherein she can be slain by using the legendary weapons Reason and Common Sense, but only if her outer defenses are previously dissolved by use of Disintegrate or a similar quality spell/tool.

Hrm. I didn't think that Reason or Common Sense ever worked on a Psycho Bitch? Maybe you're just more effective at crafting and wielding your weapons...

... The big boss told me yesterday that if this does end up going to court that he is going to depend on me.

No pressure there eh? Good luck if it goes that far!

[EricKei]

Hrm. I didn't think that Reason or Common Sense ever worked on a Psycho Bitch?

Hey, everyone rolls a natural 20 from time to time...