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"I don't mind eating broken glass"

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  • "I don't mind eating broken glass"

    Early evening. It's a fairly quiet evening and one of the cooks is wandering around finding things to clean. He spots a mark on the ceiling that ends up annoying him. The mark is on a glass covering of a light fixture. He decides to climb a ladder over the hot equipment (yes, I know, very fucking stupid!) and give it a clean. He isn't happy with the result and decides the best option is to take the fixture down.

    Yeah. He dropped it. A three foot piece of glass fell to the ground. It landed on the grill and the deep fat fryer, shattering into a million pieces. The kitchen was left in shocked silence, while a co-worker ran out.

    CW: Did you hear that?
    Me: What's happened?
    CW: Come and look.

    Myself and the manager walked in. There was glass EVERYWHERE.

    Manager: Fucks sake. Right, kitchens closed. Turn everything off. Get the vacuum cleaner.

    It's a good job we have such understanding customers!

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    SC: I would like to order some meals please.
    Me: Oh I'm sorry, but we have had to close our kitchen for the evening.

    I point to the massive chalk board sign next to the customers face that states this.

    Me: A large piece of glass has fallen out the ceiling and shattered in there. We need to close to avoid any form of contamination.
    SC: Oh it's ok! I'm only ordering a salad.
    Me: The kitchen closing also includes salad.
    SC: But that doesn't count!!

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    SC: Is this sign telling the truth??
    Me: Yes, it is incapable of lying.
    SC: But I brought my family for dinner! What can we eat then??
    Me: We have bar snacks...
    SC: Like a burger?
    Me: No.

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    SC: Where else am I supposed to eat??
    Me: I recommend *Japanese restaurant* It's amazing.
    SC: No!
    Me: If you like Italian food there's *Italian restaurant*
    SC: No!
    Me: There's the Chinese place, the Mexican, the Jamaican, Burger Bar, *Rival Pub*, McDonalds, KFC, Burger King, Steak House, Other Italian Restaurant, Indian, Pizza Place, American Diner-
    SC: There's no choice in this town!!!

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    SC: What happened??
    Me: *explains*
    SC: Well, if they are really careful it should be ok.
    Me: I am not putting any food orders through.
    SC: Surely they will spot a piece of glass!
    Me: Some of the glass is very small. The entire kitchen needs cleaning from top to bottom.
    SC: I can pick the glass out myself!
    Me: NO! Plus all the equipment is off and will be cool by now.
    SC: I can't believe this. I'm a grown man! I'll decide what's good for me.
    Me: Broken glass isn't good for anyone.

  • #2
    There are seriously times I wish we didn't live in an age of "I was a numpty and hurt myself but it's your fault" lawsuits, so we could get away with letting these numpties eat broken glass and die, to preserve the gene pool.

    But of course they'll probably have already procreated, so it's too late for that.
    PWNADE(TM) - Serve up a glass today! | PWNZER - An act of pwnage so awesome, it's like the victim got hit by a tank.

    There are only Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse because I choose to walk!

    Comment


    • #3
      Yet another example of why common sense is not a present or a prize, but a punishment for all of us who have it. Because we have to put up with all the ones who don't!

      Comment


      • #4
        Quoth XRogue View Post
        Yet another example of why common sense is not a present or a prize, but a punishment for all of us who have it. Because we have to put up with all the ones who don't!

        These days Common Sense is so rare, it's a superpower!

        And yes, it sucks royally living amongst the mere mortals. More like mentally exhausting just trying to figure out how they made it through life as far as they have without killing others with their stupidity.

        Out of wine . . . send more
        Human Resources - the adult version of "I'm telling Mom." - Agent Anthony "Tony" DiNozzo (NCIS)

        Comment


        • #5
          Idiots.

          I especially hate the one who said there's "no choice in this town." I counted; you named 13 other places he could go eat. I repeat: Idiots.
          When you start at zero, everything's progress.

          Comment


          • #6
            Quoth DGoddessChardonnay View Post
            These days Common Sense is so rare, it's a superpower!

            And yes, it sucks royally living amongst the mere mortals. More like mentally exhausting just trying to figure out how they made it through life as far as they have without killing others with their stupidity.

            Out of wine . . . send more

            I am not out of wine, having learned to make mead, and will sent plenty posthaste! Lort knows we all need it.

            Comment


            • #7
              Quoth MoonCat View Post
              Idiots.

              I especially hate the one who said there's "no choice in this town." I counted; you named 13 other places he could go eat. I repeat: Idiots.
              Ah, but you see, what the idiot means is there's NO OTHER PLACE EXACTLY LIKE CRML'S PLACE. There is, thus, no other place to eat.

              Jay 2K Winger: I absolutely agree. Wish like hell we could let these idiots reap the consequences of their own stupidity. If nothing else, people who work with the public would only have to put up with each twit one time. 'Cause then Darwin's Law would kick in.
              Customer service: More efficient than a Dementor's kiss
              ~ Mr Hero

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              • #8
                "'Cause I'd rather spend eternity eating shards of broken glass, Than spend one more minute with you"
                To right the countless wrongs of our days... We shine this light of true redemption, that this place may become as paradise...Oh, what a wonderful world such would be...

                Comment


                • #9
                  Quoth Mr Hero View Post
                  "'Cause I'd rather spend eternity eating shards of broken glass, Than spend one more minute with you"
                  Weird Al quotes are always in order.
                  Life's too short to drink cheap beer

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    my one and only thought reading this?

                    I think that worker needs a drug test cause that aint normal behavior

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Quoth MoonCat View Post
                      Idiots.

                      I especially hate the one who said there's "no choice in this town." I counted; you named 13 other places he could go eat. I repeat: Idiots.
                      From reading some of CRML's previous posts, there's a good chance his customers have been banned from all those other places. Hence, "no choice".

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Quoth Mr Hero View Post
                        "'Cause I'd rather spend eternity eating shards of broken glass, Than spend one more minute with you"
                        Weird Al FTW!
                        "I try to be curious about everything, even things that don't interest me." -Alex Trebek

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          And the CW in the kitchen when he was doing this didn't try to stop him because....?
                          "I am quite confident that I do exist."
                          "Excuse me, I'm making perfect sense. You're just not keeping up." The Doctor

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Quoth Dreamstalker View Post
                            And the CW in the kitchen when he was doing this didn't try to stop him because....?
                            He probably didn't think much of it until it reached the "oh, shit!" stage.

                            I've got to wonder about CRML's customers. I mean, these people have absolutely no common sense or self-preservation instincts. How did so many thick-heads end up in one area? I guess these dopes breed faster than they can Darwin-Award themselves out of existence.
                            I don't have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem.
                            My LiveJournal
                            A page we can all agree with!

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Quoth XCashier View Post
                              He probably didn't think much of it until it reached the "oh, shit!" stage.

                              I've got to wonder about CRML's customers. I mean, these people have absolutely no common sense or self-preservation instincts. How did so many thick-heads end up in one area? I guess these dopes breed faster than they can Darwin-Award themselves out of existence.
                              These are also the habitues of a pub, and hence, drinkers, so their mental acuity may not always be top-notch.
                              PWNADE(TM) - Serve up a glass today! | PWNZER - An act of pwnage so awesome, it's like the victim got hit by a tank.

                              There are only Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse because I choose to walk!

                              Comment

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