Customer Suck Digests/Archives

[Seraph]

Compiling my threads?....You're attempting to summon something of fire, aren't you?

In all seriousness, I have no idea how I made your list, but thanks. Seriously, my first thoughts were GK, Jester, Kara, CRML, and Arga. Definitely shocked here. But...thank you.

[BroSCFischer]

Compiling my threads?....You're attempting to summon something of fire, aren't you?

In all seriousness, I have no idea how I made your list, but thanks. Seriously, my first thoughts were GK, Jester, Kara, CRML, and Arga. Definitely shocked here. But...thank you.

Only one not on my (not Cooper's) list that you mentioned is Jester, and that's because his is a monumental task, considering some of his best stories are in his replies to other member's threads.

But, yeah, Seraph, you made the cut as far as I am concerned as well. No need to be so shocked by it, you are quite entertaining in your posts.

SC

[Eevie]

Compiling my threads?....You're attempting to summon something of fire, aren't you?

In all seriousness, I have no idea how I made your list, but thanks. Seriously, my first thoughts were GK, Jester, Kara, CRML, and Arga. Definitely shocked here. But...thank you.

I'm agreeing with BroSCFischer on this one. Seraph, know it or not, I'd say you're probably one of CS's celebrities. I know you and Jester are at the top of my list if I had to decide who is most entertaining. Hard to decide a third place, however...

[Jester]

I know Jester, and CRML both have more than 20 pages worth of threads that they have created. I don't know how many other members have as well. However, if the poster has well over 1,000 posts you will probably need to, at the very least, refine your search.

Remember that, as far as I recall, posts made in Off Topic are not counted towards a member's post tally. Saying that, and seeing that I have over 5,600 posts, and happen to know I have often been very active in Off Topic, I wish you luck with this whole project. It seems you're gonna need it.

Only one not on my (not Cooper's) list that you mentioned is Jester, and that's because his is a monumental task, considering some of his best stories are in his replies to other member's threads.

I am both humbled by this and reminded that sometimes, I'm a verbose little shit.

I know you and Jester are at the top of my list if I had to decide who is most entertaining.

And now I'm really humbled.

[Cooper]

I've actually finished yours, Seraph, but because yours is the shortest, I'm not going to upload a raw, and just finish sorting them. (Yours is closer to 300 pages in word.)

Seraph, you're the enemy of normalcy. Of course you're included.

The ones I have on my list right now are the ones I thought of on the top of my head. I know there's a couple more that I'm probably missing, but in the sake of not biting off more than I can chew, I'm not making any promises just this second.

[Kara]

I have a pretty complete set for Kara (I think up to 2012).

I never saved any of my posts. Maybe I should have. But it would seem I have willing minions to do that for me.

This is an interesting idea. I don't ever read my old posts, it'll be fun to look at them again. I think I was a lot more witty and entertaining when I was required to censor myself at work.

If I wasn't so savagely hyper-critical of my own artwork, I'd entertain the notion of doing some illustrations. But when I try to do something artistic, I just wind up hating it.

[ArcticChicken]

To add to the list: Whiskey, Dips, Joitheartist

[Cooper]

So, Seraph, you'll get a kick out of this. I figured I'd finish yours entirely tonight, and put it up. But the power went out. Because THREE trees knocked down the same powerline that happens to lead to my home. (I'm on a dead-end road, and the last tree isat the corner.)

I figured that wouldn't stop me, but I went down to my parent's house, realizing they had a radio, internet, tv, even a phone, meaning I would know if there was a tornado warning.

Which there was.

A cop is now blocking my way home now, so I'm stuck here away from my work. (ahh)

I have GK's on a flash-drive, so I can keep working on that if I'd like, but I'm just vainly hoping for the cop car to leave. But seeing as gain, the power line is down in three places...

[Seraph]

...I...I promise I didn't do it. <-<

[EricKei]

Another vote for Kusanagi, here -- I believe I came in towards the end of the time he was here >_>

A story he had posted (regarding delivery services in California during wildfire season -- specifically, dealing with customers who could not understand why having roads that were actively on fire, or inaccessible by other reasons, would prevent their deliveries from getting through) was the first mega-thread of note I ever read here, and the one that convinced me to stay and post, rather than stay and lurk. It appears that my Search-Fu is weak today, as I have, as of yet, been unable to locate it x.x I wanna say it was in War Stories, as, if it's not, it deserves to be there.

...I...I promise I didn't do it. <-<

Uh-huh . Just give it up and change your avatar to your true form: Discord.

[Kara]

Uh-huh . Just give it up and change your avatar to your true form: Discord.

Nah, Discord wrSeaks mayhem on purpose. Seraph is more like a localized natural phenomenon.

[Cooper]

So, this was my 'apocalyptic log' from last night. Afterwards I had a mild panic attack, hence the meds, because with them, 'oh god I'm gonna die' turns into 'I'm having a panic attack. I can breathe. I just have to take a deep breath.'

Cooper: OH GOD THE WIND IS SHAKING MY HOUSE
Cooper: THE LIGHTNING IS ALMOST EPILEPTIC
Cooper: THE INTERNET IS GONE
Cooper: THE POWER IS GONE
Cooper: GOD HELP ME
Cooper: I CAN'T EVEN LOOK UP HOW CLOSE THE LIGHTNING IS
Cooper: I JUST KNOW THERE IS ABOUT 2 SECONDS BETWEEN EACH FLASH
Cooper: THIS IS MY APOCALYPTIC LOG YOU WILL READ IT SOMEDAY
Cooper: I DIDN'T MEAN TO SUMMON THE MEGAVILWATTSTORMOFEVIL HELP ME

Then I realized I had no radio, no landline, no TV access, no internet access, no way to tell if there was a tornado coming.

So I got in my car, and turned the radio on. Then decided to see where the power went out. I couldn't actually get to the end of the road without going through someone's yard. (They had two driveways. One was on one side of the tree that fell, one was on the other.) It wasn't very polite. I blame it on the panic attack. (Note, I need to stop driving when I have those.)

Around 11:30, a cop showed up to inform people about the tree, and refuse to let people through.

AT 12, I checked to see if I could get home. Nope. The cop told me I could walk home. With downed power lines, puddles that could be up to my knees, and downed power lines, I decided not to.

At 1, he left, but the tree was still there. So I went around the tree rudly again, got home, and slept.

Power came back on sometime this morning.

I got ice cream out of it, which was also a mixed bag, as it was delicious but confirmed I was lactose intolerant.

[EricKei]

Kara -- So, she's Pinkie Pie, everyone's favorite walking, talking, dancing (and occasionally baking) incarnation of Chaos, then?

[Seraph]

Nah, Discord wrSeaks mayhem on purpose. Seraph is more like a localized natural phenomenon.

The truth is sad but...true.

[Jay 2K Winger]

Nah, Discord wrSeaks mayhem on purpose. Seraph is more like a localized natural phenomenon.

Discord = Mayhem on Purpose

Seraph = Accidental Apocalypse