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Three hours I'll never get back

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  • Three hours I'll never get back

    I went to a three-hour ... THREE-HOUR ... corporate cheer-a-thon tonight.

    It wasn't just to introduce the holiday stuff coming out soon. Oh no. We had to do the "Is everybody EXCITED?!" (No, actually, I'm cold, I'm hungry, I'm tired, it was overall a crappy day, and I'd really rather be home watching short horror films on YouTube.)

    "We're gonna have FUN!" (Oh GAWDS)

    "We're so excited to be here!" (Really? Wow. And I thought MY life was boring ...)

    It reminded me more than a little of this, although ours wasn't nearly as heavily attended (we had probably two dozen people there) It also wasn't nearly as whacked-out as this one. But if they could have made it so ... they would have.

    We got a nine-page full-colour booklet to fill out. It included questions like "What is the Human Spirit?" and "When you show up for work, do you feel like you're Inspiring and Nurturing your customers' Human Spirit?" and "Would the way we define Best Moments at [The Mothership] be any different from how we personally experience Best Moments?"

    P.S. The excessive capitalizations are NOT typos. Well, they're not mine, anyway.

    They had the company motto in BIG letters on one page and the exact same thing on the PowerPoint slide. My Bitchy Inner Editor noted that "nurture" was misspelled ("nuture").

    And yes, apparently this is an annual "thing."

    Customer service: More efficient than a Dementor's kiss
    ~ Mr Hero

  • #2
    Wow. Urum. Wow. Bleah. (looks sideways and start to job hunt AGAIN, dammit) Gag me.

    I knew I was burnt out on my last job (huge corporation) when I nearly couldn't get through a team meeting without rolling my eyes pretty hard. So glad I left, really wish I'd landed in a better job like I thought I had...

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    • #3
      Did the speaker do any of these?
      You said it's annual, is it mandatory?
      I'm trying to see things from your point of view, but I can't get my head that far up my keister!

      Who is John Galt?
      -Ayn Rand, Atlas Shrugged

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      • #4
        You got paid for this, right?

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        • #5
          OMG. I couldn't possibly do that with a straight face. What a waste of time. No one is rah-rah, no one cares about this crap. You want to work, get paid, go home.

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