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  • Confused grocery employees

    I went shopping with my wife tonight and had a couple interesting encounters with the staff.

    Isn't that a good thing?

    I have recently discovered I am allergic to the protein in products made from cow's milk. The lack of butter is tough, though there are plenty of substitutes that work. But cheese. Oh, my glorious cheese, why hast thou forsaken me?!?

    Fortunately, I can still have goat cheese. Huzzah! And Ye Olde Grocery Shoppe carries not only normal goat cheese but a variety of goat cheddar (!!!) which, to me, is basically indistinguishable from normal cheddar but for a slight hint of 'goatiness' as my wife calls it. I don't mind it at all, but we're of two minds on that one.

    Tonight, I noticed the goat cheddar slot was empty when I tried to grab some. I went up to the deli counter to ask when it would be restocked.

    Me: Excuse me, I was wondering when you will have the goat cheddar back in stock. Is there a normal delivery day for it so I can know when to come back?

    Cheese Dude: Oh, uh, nope. I don't think we're going to get more back at all.

    Me: *I haz a sad* Really? It seemed popular. Is it something I could special order? Is there a minimum amount for doing so?

    Cheese Dude: Well, I don't want to order more because every time we get some it sells out in a few days and we have to place another order. It's really annoying. I don't want to do special orders because then people will just want order more and buy it. You're like the third person tonight to ask for it, so I'll add some to next week's order, I guess. *walks away into the back*

    Me: It sells out every time you get it and this is bad?

    Clean up, but only liquids:

    As we continued through the store, we got into an aisle where someone had spilled a bunch of animal crackers on the floor. And other people had clearly just been walking right through the spill, grinding them into dust. WTF, people, WTF.

    Since I had to get lottery tickets anyway, I went up to the customer service desk to do so and report the spill. She called it out over the PA while running my tickets.

    When I get back to the aisle to meet up with my wife, I see one of the clerks literally standing with his feet straddling the cookies with a rag and a bottle of cleaning spray. He asks two other customers nearby where the spill is located and what they spilled. They just shake their heads and walk away.

    Clerk: *shouting to the woman at the service desk* Hey, there's no spill, didn't you say aisle 9?

    Me: Um, dude, I the one who reported it. It's the crackers right there in the middle of the aisle by your feet.

    Clerk: Crackers? Yeah, I saw those. But they're not a spill, so I can't wipe it up with a rag.

    Me: So, dustpan and a broom, maybe?

    Clerk: But clean ups have to be done with a rag!

    Me: Tell you what, I'll just go speak to a manager about it, then.

    Clerk: FINE! I'll use the broom, but that's not a CLEAN up, it's a SWEEP up! She *pointing at service desk* said clean up. *storms off*

    I look at the woman at the service desk, we both exchange and move on with our lives. I did swing back after we got to the end of the next aisle to see the clerk had showed with a broom and dustpan to clean up the crackers. He appeared to be muttering to himself the whole time. Probably because cleaning & sweeping are two very different activities.

  • #2
    Cheese Chump is just unhappy because all these people are on his case to do this... job thing. Seriously, who wants to do that crap? There's, like, nothing in it for him.

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    • #3
      Goat Cheddar sounds delicious, and is also the name of my next band.
      This was one of those times where my mouth says "have a nice day" but my brain says "go step on a Lego". - RegisterAce
      I can't make something magically appear to fulfill all your hopes and dreams. Believe me, if I could I'd be the first person I'd help. - Trixie

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      • #4
        Quoth RealUnimportant View Post
        Goat Cheddar ... is also the name of my next band.
        And your first single will be... "Cheese It, The Trolls!"
        I am not an a**hole. I am a hemorrhoid. I irritate a**holes!
        Procrastination: Forward planning to insure there is something to do tomorrow.
        Derails threads faster than a pocket nuke.

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        • #5
          Quoth RealUnimportant View Post
          Goat Cheddar sounds delicious
          It really, really is. And it melts like normal cheddar cheese, so I can use it for grilled cheese sandwiches, homemade pizzas, etc. It's fantastic.

          Expensive, though - $20 per pound. Fortunately, I am in a place where I can make the switch to this cheese without entirely breaking my wallet.

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          • #6
            Cheese Dude sounds like our manager: she doesn't want to (we have heard her say these exact words) order items that we all know sell out and that customers want.
            "I am quite confident that I do exist."
            "Excuse me, I'm making perfect sense. You're just not keeping up." The Doctor

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            • #7
              Urg, I wonder if the Cheese guy's superior would like to know that he deliberately doesn't order things which sell out of sheer laziness? I bet the store makes a pretty penny on expensive products like that and would love for them to keep selling.
              Replace anger management with stupidity management.

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              • #8
                Just out of interest, have you tried cheese made out of sheep's milk? It's rather nice. The most well-known type is feta cheese, which is either made purely out of sheep's milk or from a mixture of sheep and goat's milk.
                "It is traditional when asking for help or advice to listen to the answers you receive" - RealUnimportant

                Rev that Engine Louder, I Can't Hear How Small Your Dick Is - Jay 2K Winger

                The Darwin Awards The best site to visit to restore your faith in instant karma.

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                • #9
                  Quoth greek_jester View Post
                  Just out of interest, have you tried cheese made out of sheep's milk?
                  I have, though I'm not as big on sheep's milk cheeses. Something about them doesn't quite sit right on my palate. I have found pecorino romano to be something of a parmesean replacement, even though parmesean is still clearly superior.

                  I have opinions. If you disagree with them, you're wrong.

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                  • #10
                    Quoth Gerrinson View Post
                    I have opinions. If you disagree with them, you're wrong.
                    I'm 1/4 Greek, 1/4 Irish, and various proportions English, Indian, and Jewish. Try me.
                    "It is traditional when asking for help or advice to listen to the answers you receive" - RealUnimportant

                    Rev that Engine Louder, I Can't Hear How Small Your Dick Is - Jay 2K Winger

                    The Darwin Awards The best site to visit to restore your faith in instant karma.

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                    • #11
                      For all the cheese aficionados out there I offer you the song Quattro Sabatino from Box Trolls. The lyrics are here, with descriptions of all the cheeses in the song.
                      "I don't have to be petty. The Universe does that for me."

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                      • #12
                        Chuh-chuh-chuh-chuh-HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZEEEEEEEEEEEE....!

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                        • #13
                          Quoth greek_jester View Post
                          I'm 1/4 Greek, 1/4 Irish, and various proportions English, Indian, and Jewish. Try me.
                          With either the Irish *or* the Jewish you should do right fine arguing with yourself!
                          I am not an a**hole. I am a hemorrhoid. I irritate a**holes!
                          Procrastination: Forward planning to insure there is something to do tomorrow.
                          Derails threads faster than a pocket nuke.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Quoth dalesys View Post
                            With either the Irish *or* the Jewish you should do right fine arguing with yourself!
                            Been there, done that...
                            "It is traditional when asking for help or advice to listen to the answers you receive" - RealUnimportant

                            Rev that Engine Louder, I Can't Hear How Small Your Dick Is - Jay 2K Winger

                            The Darwin Awards The best site to visit to restore your faith in instant karma.

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                            • #15
                              Quoth dalesys View Post
                              With either the Irish *or* the Jewish you should do right fine arguing with yourself!
                              Hey, nothing wrong with spirited discussions with the voices in your head. You're always assured semi-intelligent conversation.*

                              * - Only semi-intelligent because there's always that one voice that resists logic and common sense.
                              PWNADE(TM) - Serve up a glass today! | PWNZER - An act of pwnage so awesome, it's like the victim got hit by a tank.

                              There are only Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse because I choose to walk!

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